Disclaimer: itz not mine!!!!!!!!!!! Except for the plot. I think?!
We will start off with the ringwraiths.....
Another boring day in Mordor, and for some weird tutoring setup meeting, Sauron is off in Rivendell.
"So what is this about us tutoring the Fellowship?" asked RW 1
A~N:::the Witchking is Ringwraith 9, and RW stands for Ringwraith
"Lord knows" answered RW 2 drily.
"Then I must be your lord" said RW 9 as he strode into the room imperiously.
"Dude, I coulda sworn you were the Witch king. Dude, did you like, change your name to lord? That's like, gnarly dude" said RW 3
"Oh shut up, witch-boy's just boss's favorite, nothing more. He is DEFINITELY not our lord!" exclaimed RW 1
"You guys are hopeless!" said RW 4
yet another ringwraith rushed into the room
"Hey guys, I just heard the ringwraith's 5, 6, and 8 died!" cried RW 7 as he entered the room
"sweet!" cried RW 3.
"you idiot! How are we going to do the mentor program for the Fellowship if 3 of us are dead!?!?!" said RW 2 loudly
"Hey, I thought ringwraiths couldn't die!?" asked RW 2
"they can now" said RW 9, "but we better get working on this mentor program. I don't know what we're supposed to do with a bunch of hobbits and elves and mean and dwarves"
"we'll each only have 1 of them, DUH!" yelled RW 4
"dude, aren't some of us dead now. Gnarly" said RW 3
"1st of all, stop ending every sentence with gnarly!!!! That is driving me insane!!! But 4 has a point, some of us will have to double up" announced RW 9.
Soon, everone was screaming and yelling, and no one knew what anybody else was saying.
"EVERYBODY SHUT UP NOW!!!!!!!!!! WE HAVE TO GET THIS MENTOR PROGRAM TOGETHER! WE ALL HAVE TO BE IN RIVENDELL IN 3 HOURS! SO GET CRACKING!" screamed RW 9 at the top of his lungs.
Everyone started bustling around and packing their suitcases, and 1 hour later they were ready to go.
"allright everyone, we want to set a good example, because Sauron is depending us, and because I don't want us to all make fools of ourselves! I heard of an invention called the evil cloud. It is big and black, and it is willing to give us a lift. None of you insult the evil cloud, or else we will all be dead! Lets go! The Evil Cloud is waiting!" said RW 9 when everyone was packed
"I have a few words to say," said RW 4, and everyone shut up and listened to him. "I would like to let you all know that clouds have feelings too you know, and we all need to respect that! Just like mosquitoes and lady bugs! Especially ladybugs! No one ever respects the poor little ladybugs, but really they are good, kind little creatures that never meant to hurt anybody, so I think that everybody should be nicer from now on to the lady.."
suddenly the rest of them cut him off, and everyone threw tomatoes at RW 4. Then RW 9 gave everyone an evil glare and they all marched off in silence to the evil cloud.
As usual in Mordor, the skies were dark and cloudy. Everyone was silent as they single file stepped onto the evil cloud, which was hovering just outside of the tall black tower where the ringwraiths usually live. The evil cloud was a dark, dark shade of gray, almost black, and was very large, soft, and fluffy. The evil cloud said nothing, yet all of the ringwraiths were filled with a dark sense of foreboding as they climbed onto the evil cloud. They expected it to be very cruel and ruthless, and only RW 9 seemed confident
"don't worry, guys. Evil Cloud may seem evil but really she is quite.....well, I'll let you find out for yourselves" said the witchking mysteriously as they were boarding.
"Oh great, this is really gonna suck" complained RW 1 lamely as they seated themselves on the evil cloud.
"Yeah, I can only hope that we get to rivendell alive" replied RW 2.
I get the feeling this chapter is going to get really long boring, so I will speed up the evil cloud journey......
When all the RWs were seated, the dark cloud flew high into the sky and zoomed away. But, by the time they were way way high, and no one could see anything but clouds, changes started occurring. the evil cloud got a lighter shade of gray, and then miraculously turned pink!
Lollipops popped in the RWs hands out of no where, and RW 4 even a dozen or so ladybugs perched on his arms and shoulders.
At first, the RWs were pleased. A little bit of happiness is good everbody, right?! But, when the fairies jumped out of nowhere and started singing (as an example: stay on the sunny side/always on the sunnyside/stay on the sunnyside of life/it will help relieve the pain/it will brighten all your days/if you stay on the sunnyside of life!!!!!) happy songs, the rainbows started popping up everwhere, and cupcakes with pink icing appeared in everyone's hands it got to be a little too much. Except, of course, for 4, who was in his own little world of ladybugs.
Then, chaos took control. The ringwraiths went crazy, all of the peace and happiness of the evil cloud was driving them insane, their evil brains couldn't stand the pressure.
The Witchking was the only one to remain calm, and (don't ask me how) he talked to Evil Cloud.
"Maybe you should tone down a bit" suggested RW 9, panic stricken that Evil Cloud would get angry and kick them off.
"Never! This is the way my transportation is, and I'm not going to change that! But we are approaching a good windstream, and we're fairly close to Rivendell. I don't know if that helps, though. But please do your best to quiet them, I need to concentrate" whispered Evil Cloud to the Witchking
"AHA! I have an idea!", and with that Witchking snapped his fingers, and suddenly all 6 ringwraiths had strange packs on their backs, with odd pulltabs.
There was complete silence, and the Witchking addressed the RWs.
"Listen, you are all obviously having trouble behaving for Evil Cloud, so we will have to find our own means of transportation. I have provided you all with parachutes. Now, do exactly as I say. We will all stand on the edge of Evil Cloud, and when I give the word we jump. As we are falling, I will whistle loudly, and when I whistle you will all yank your pull tab. But we must all jump and pull our parachute tabs TOGETHER!!!!!"
Everyone nodded solemnly, and they assembled themselves on the edge of Evil Cloud.
"When I give the word!...1..2..3..JUMP!!!!" yelled the Witchking, and the 6 ringwraiths jumped.
After about 10 seconds, Witchking whistled loudly, and everyone pulled their parachute tabs. Unfortunately, a ladybug landed on RW 4's arm just as Witchking gave the signal to release your parachute.
"Hello friend. How has the great wide world been treating you? Good, I hope, because if not then....." 4 trailed off, as RW 3 pulled the parachute tab for him.
"Dude, you gotta stop talkin' to those little red things. It like, totally messes stuff up. I mean, sure maybe you think little red bugs are gnarly, but you're gonna get yourself killed. Dude" said RW 3, midair, after saving RW 4.
Meanwhile, the Fellowship had gathered in Rivendell, and everyone was out on the patio with Elrond, Haldir, and Sauron.
"They are late. I thought you said your servants are always PROMPT, Sauron. I have a city to run, meetings to attend to, I cannot wait here all day! So how are they getting here, anyhow?" said Elrond nervously
"Ummmm...you mean transportation? Well, they decided that the most reliable form of getting around is by...ummmm..cloud" answered Sauron uncertainly
"CLOUD! FOR GOD'S SAKE, WHAT WERE YOU THINKING! THIS IS IMPORTANT, SAURON! I CAN'T HAVE IMPORTANT PEOPLE THAT ARE MEMBERS OF IMPORTANT PROGRAMS FLYING IN ON PINK BALLS OF FLUFF!"
"Well actually, this is an EVIL Cloud" muttered Sauron.
"OH GREAT, SO NOW IT BREATHES FLAMES! GREAT IMPROVEMENT THERE!" Elrond continued to scream
Suddenly, Haldir interrupted their heated argument.
"Ummm, guys, look over there. What is that?" asked Haldir tentatively.
Everyone turned to see......
"What in Middle Earth is that? Sauron, that's no pink fluffy cottonball I see descending from the sky!!!" exclaimed Elrond
dun dun dun!............
they never got to meet the Fellowship, but oh well, if it was any longer then...I don't know, but I don't want to make it any longer!!!!
NEXT chap, they will finally meet eachother, and be paired off.
Hope you enjoyed!!!
R&R!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEEZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We will start off with the ringwraiths.....
Another boring day in Mordor, and for some weird tutoring setup meeting, Sauron is off in Rivendell.
"So what is this about us tutoring the Fellowship?" asked RW 1
A~N:::the Witchking is Ringwraith 9, and RW stands for Ringwraith
"Lord knows" answered RW 2 drily.
"Then I must be your lord" said RW 9 as he strode into the room imperiously.
"Dude, I coulda sworn you were the Witch king. Dude, did you like, change your name to lord? That's like, gnarly dude" said RW 3
"Oh shut up, witch-boy's just boss's favorite, nothing more. He is DEFINITELY not our lord!" exclaimed RW 1
"You guys are hopeless!" said RW 4
yet another ringwraith rushed into the room
"Hey guys, I just heard the ringwraith's 5, 6, and 8 died!" cried RW 7 as he entered the room
"sweet!" cried RW 3.
"you idiot! How are we going to do the mentor program for the Fellowship if 3 of us are dead!?!?!" said RW 2 loudly
"Hey, I thought ringwraiths couldn't die!?" asked RW 2
"they can now" said RW 9, "but we better get working on this mentor program. I don't know what we're supposed to do with a bunch of hobbits and elves and mean and dwarves"
"we'll each only have 1 of them, DUH!" yelled RW 4
"dude, aren't some of us dead now. Gnarly" said RW 3
"1st of all, stop ending every sentence with gnarly!!!! That is driving me insane!!! But 4 has a point, some of us will have to double up" announced RW 9.
Soon, everone was screaming and yelling, and no one knew what anybody else was saying.
"EVERYBODY SHUT UP NOW!!!!!!!!!! WE HAVE TO GET THIS MENTOR PROGRAM TOGETHER! WE ALL HAVE TO BE IN RIVENDELL IN 3 HOURS! SO GET CRACKING!" screamed RW 9 at the top of his lungs.
Everyone started bustling around and packing their suitcases, and 1 hour later they were ready to go.
"allright everyone, we want to set a good example, because Sauron is depending us, and because I don't want us to all make fools of ourselves! I heard of an invention called the evil cloud. It is big and black, and it is willing to give us a lift. None of you insult the evil cloud, or else we will all be dead! Lets go! The Evil Cloud is waiting!" said RW 9 when everyone was packed
"I have a few words to say," said RW 4, and everyone shut up and listened to him. "I would like to let you all know that clouds have feelings too you know, and we all need to respect that! Just like mosquitoes and lady bugs! Especially ladybugs! No one ever respects the poor little ladybugs, but really they are good, kind little creatures that never meant to hurt anybody, so I think that everybody should be nicer from now on to the lady.."
suddenly the rest of them cut him off, and everyone threw tomatoes at RW 4. Then RW 9 gave everyone an evil glare and they all marched off in silence to the evil cloud.
As usual in Mordor, the skies were dark and cloudy. Everyone was silent as they single file stepped onto the evil cloud, which was hovering just outside of the tall black tower where the ringwraiths usually live. The evil cloud was a dark, dark shade of gray, almost black, and was very large, soft, and fluffy. The evil cloud said nothing, yet all of the ringwraiths were filled with a dark sense of foreboding as they climbed onto the evil cloud. They expected it to be very cruel and ruthless, and only RW 9 seemed confident
"don't worry, guys. Evil Cloud may seem evil but really she is quite.....well, I'll let you find out for yourselves" said the witchking mysteriously as they were boarding.
"Oh great, this is really gonna suck" complained RW 1 lamely as they seated themselves on the evil cloud.
"Yeah, I can only hope that we get to rivendell alive" replied RW 2.
I get the feeling this chapter is going to get really long boring, so I will speed up the evil cloud journey......
When all the RWs were seated, the dark cloud flew high into the sky and zoomed away. But, by the time they were way way high, and no one could see anything but clouds, changes started occurring. the evil cloud got a lighter shade of gray, and then miraculously turned pink!
Lollipops popped in the RWs hands out of no where, and RW 4 even a dozen or so ladybugs perched on his arms and shoulders.
At first, the RWs were pleased. A little bit of happiness is good everbody, right?! But, when the fairies jumped out of nowhere and started singing (as an example: stay on the sunny side/always on the sunnyside/stay on the sunnyside of life/it will help relieve the pain/it will brighten all your days/if you stay on the sunnyside of life!!!!!) happy songs, the rainbows started popping up everwhere, and cupcakes with pink icing appeared in everyone's hands it got to be a little too much. Except, of course, for 4, who was in his own little world of ladybugs.
Then, chaos took control. The ringwraiths went crazy, all of the peace and happiness of the evil cloud was driving them insane, their evil brains couldn't stand the pressure.
The Witchking was the only one to remain calm, and (don't ask me how) he talked to Evil Cloud.
"Maybe you should tone down a bit" suggested RW 9, panic stricken that Evil Cloud would get angry and kick them off.
"Never! This is the way my transportation is, and I'm not going to change that! But we are approaching a good windstream, and we're fairly close to Rivendell. I don't know if that helps, though. But please do your best to quiet them, I need to concentrate" whispered Evil Cloud to the Witchking
"AHA! I have an idea!", and with that Witchking snapped his fingers, and suddenly all 6 ringwraiths had strange packs on their backs, with odd pulltabs.
There was complete silence, and the Witchking addressed the RWs.
"Listen, you are all obviously having trouble behaving for Evil Cloud, so we will have to find our own means of transportation. I have provided you all with parachutes. Now, do exactly as I say. We will all stand on the edge of Evil Cloud, and when I give the word we jump. As we are falling, I will whistle loudly, and when I whistle you will all yank your pull tab. But we must all jump and pull our parachute tabs TOGETHER!!!!!"
Everyone nodded solemnly, and they assembled themselves on the edge of Evil Cloud.
"When I give the word!...1..2..3..JUMP!!!!" yelled the Witchking, and the 6 ringwraiths jumped.
After about 10 seconds, Witchking whistled loudly, and everyone pulled their parachute tabs. Unfortunately, a ladybug landed on RW 4's arm just as Witchking gave the signal to release your parachute.
"Hello friend. How has the great wide world been treating you? Good, I hope, because if not then....." 4 trailed off, as RW 3 pulled the parachute tab for him.
"Dude, you gotta stop talkin' to those little red things. It like, totally messes stuff up. I mean, sure maybe you think little red bugs are gnarly, but you're gonna get yourself killed. Dude" said RW 3, midair, after saving RW 4.
Meanwhile, the Fellowship had gathered in Rivendell, and everyone was out on the patio with Elrond, Haldir, and Sauron.
"They are late. I thought you said your servants are always PROMPT, Sauron. I have a city to run, meetings to attend to, I cannot wait here all day! So how are they getting here, anyhow?" said Elrond nervously
"Ummmm...you mean transportation? Well, they decided that the most reliable form of getting around is by...ummmm..cloud" answered Sauron uncertainly
"CLOUD! FOR GOD'S SAKE, WHAT WERE YOU THINKING! THIS IS IMPORTANT, SAURON! I CAN'T HAVE IMPORTANT PEOPLE THAT ARE MEMBERS OF IMPORTANT PROGRAMS FLYING IN ON PINK BALLS OF FLUFF!"
"Well actually, this is an EVIL Cloud" muttered Sauron.
"OH GREAT, SO NOW IT BREATHES FLAMES! GREAT IMPROVEMENT THERE!" Elrond continued to scream
Suddenly, Haldir interrupted their heated argument.
"Ummm, guys, look over there. What is that?" asked Haldir tentatively.
Everyone turned to see......
"What in Middle Earth is that? Sauron, that's no pink fluffy cottonball I see descending from the sky!!!" exclaimed Elrond
dun dun dun!............
they never got to meet the Fellowship, but oh well, if it was any longer then...I don't know, but I don't want to make it any longer!!!!
NEXT chap, they will finally meet eachother, and be paired off.
Hope you enjoyed!!!
R&R!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEEZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!