AN: Let's unpause the movie! An update! Really, procrastination from studying, but in the end it's the same diff, yeah? Love your reviews, keep em coming! And don't forget...cast your vote if you haven't already. I've answered a couple of reviews in my profile but I love you all, never fear (just answered the ones that have questions).
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Last time, on POTC: Jack, your brother and Will have joined forces to defeat the Matrix once and for all, while gaining the One Ring in the process. Nah, not really, but at this stage, does it really matter what came before? Your brother is Norrington. You watch the movie with that one vital difference.
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Your brother barks his orders. "Men! I want to see all hands on the Interceptor, immediately! Captain Jack Sparrow is trying to steal the Dauntless, I need all hands on deck!"
Well. This is a scene that's unfamiliar to you. As the army/navy/whoever the hell they are run around like ants on the Interceptor, your brother walks up the gangplank and the ship starts to move off. When they come level with the Dauntless, your brother yells for the army to board the ship. But what's this? He himself isn't moving a muscle, still standing rooted to the deck of the Interceptor in one position. A couple of the men who are last to board the Dauntless turn around and stare at him uncertainly from her decks.
"Are you coming, sir?" they shout, confused as to his lack of movement.
"Of course I am," your brother yells, "can't you see that I'm right behind you?"
He nods at the bow of the Dauntless, and two figures swing down on ropes: Jack and Will. Jack sweeps his hat off in a low bow, and Will waves merrily to the befuddled crew stuck aboard the Dauntless. A random naval officer - you don't know his name, and don't care enough to look it up in the credits - stares at your brother, mouth agape.
"Commodore Norrington, have you gone berserk? That there's the pirate captain!" he shouts, shocked beyond disbelief.
"Oh, so it is," replies your brother unconcernedly. "Whoops. I may have inadvertently helped him to steal the ship. He must be one of the best pirates I've ever heard of."
Jack preens at this last comment, while Will rolls his eyes. Far away, in another time and place, you roll your eyes too. Your brother was sneaky enough to be included in this voyage. He got the ship going - good for him. You are so jealous that you don't even want to appreciate how smart your brother has been so far. If you'd been stuck in the movie, you have no doubt you would have accidentally got yourself killed in the raid on Port Royal, or worse, but you don't want to give Ihim/I the credit - oh no. As the Interceptor leaves land far behind, your brother pops down to the galley to see what food's on offer. Typical teenage boy, he can't last an hour without stuffing his face. He brings some bread and wine up on deck - apparently his alter ego Norrington keeps the ship well stocked - and sits on a barrel up on the bridge to enjoy it.
Will approaches Jack and your brother with a determined look on his face. "I'm not a simpleton, Jack. You knew my father."
"So did I," your brother says through a mouthful.
Jack looks at your brother. "Did you now?"
"Bootstrap Bill?" your brother pauses, and then swallows his bread. "Nah, I didn't know him. Just pulling your leg." He tears off another chunk.
"Who is Bootstrap Bill?" Will demands. "He sounds like a pirate."
"Well, he is. And he's your dad, so get used to it mate," your brother says.
Jack winks. "I swear you look just like him."
"My father was Inot/I a pirate." Will pulls out his sword. You think that he is far too eager to fight, and also hope that your brother, whose only experience of fighting with a sword was when he owned a plastic one that came with flashing lights and swoopy noises, doesn't bother challenging him to a fight. You know, he is your brother after all.
"Oh, for crying out loud." Your brother takes a swig of his wine. "Give it a rest."
Will swings his sword at your brother. "What would you know, Norrington? You barely even know what's going on in the world outside that wig of yours."
Your brother reaches up to feel at his head. "My God, you're right, I'm wearing a wig." He pulls it off and chucks it overboard, then takes off about six layers of clothing till he's down to his shirtsleeves. "Much better. Thanks, Will."
Actually, you're surprised it took him that long to take the coat off, considering in the middle of winter he used to walk around the house with shorts on.
"No...problem," Will says uncertainly. Then he turns to Jack, who has been watching the entire proceedings with a grin, and threatens him with the sword. "My father was not a pirate!"
"And mine wasn't a merchant banker, but we've all got problems," Jack replies. "Can you sail under my command to find your lovely lass or do you want me to take you home to your mother? We can't sail this ship," gestures at your brother and himself, "all by our twosies."
"Twosies," Will repeats incredulously, then: "My mother's dead."
"Fine, then you shall stay. But pirate is in your blood, boy, and you'll realise that one day, soon enough."
"Soon enough, ya tosser," your brother says with a smile. "Are we going to sail into Tortuga, Jack?"
"We'll be there soon enough, Norrington mate," Jack says as he reaches for the wine bottle your brother is holding.
"I need a better name. How about Nozza, or Norro?"
You don't believe it. Your brother is asking for a nickname. Why doesn't he just use his own first name? Then you realise...he doesn't know what Norrington's first name is, and can't risk Will giving him a strange look as he announces that his name is George when it's Jim, or whatever. Still, he seems a bit of a tool asking for a nickname.
Jack looks at Will. "I like Nozza, what do you reckon?"
"What about Norrie?"
Jack and your brother both sigh in exasperation. "Well, Iyeah/I, if you want him to sound like a Igirl/I"
"Norro?"
"Norro's good for me, is it good for you?"
"Yeah, I quite like it."
"Yeah, all right," your brother says. "Call me Norro."
He borrows a knife from Jack and begins to cut off the bottom of his trousers. You clap one hand on your head as you realise he's introducing shorts into the uniform of the Royal Navy.
AN: next time: Tortuga!
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Last time, on POTC: Jack, your brother and Will have joined forces to defeat the Matrix once and for all, while gaining the One Ring in the process. Nah, not really, but at this stage, does it really matter what came before? Your brother is Norrington. You watch the movie with that one vital difference.
------------------------------------------
Your brother barks his orders. "Men! I want to see all hands on the Interceptor, immediately! Captain Jack Sparrow is trying to steal the Dauntless, I need all hands on deck!"
Well. This is a scene that's unfamiliar to you. As the army/navy/whoever the hell they are run around like ants on the Interceptor, your brother walks up the gangplank and the ship starts to move off. When they come level with the Dauntless, your brother yells for the army to board the ship. But what's this? He himself isn't moving a muscle, still standing rooted to the deck of the Interceptor in one position. A couple of the men who are last to board the Dauntless turn around and stare at him uncertainly from her decks.
"Are you coming, sir?" they shout, confused as to his lack of movement.
"Of course I am," your brother yells, "can't you see that I'm right behind you?"
He nods at the bow of the Dauntless, and two figures swing down on ropes: Jack and Will. Jack sweeps his hat off in a low bow, and Will waves merrily to the befuddled crew stuck aboard the Dauntless. A random naval officer - you don't know his name, and don't care enough to look it up in the credits - stares at your brother, mouth agape.
"Commodore Norrington, have you gone berserk? That there's the pirate captain!" he shouts, shocked beyond disbelief.
"Oh, so it is," replies your brother unconcernedly. "Whoops. I may have inadvertently helped him to steal the ship. He must be one of the best pirates I've ever heard of."
Jack preens at this last comment, while Will rolls his eyes. Far away, in another time and place, you roll your eyes too. Your brother was sneaky enough to be included in this voyage. He got the ship going - good for him. You are so jealous that you don't even want to appreciate how smart your brother has been so far. If you'd been stuck in the movie, you have no doubt you would have accidentally got yourself killed in the raid on Port Royal, or worse, but you don't want to give Ihim/I the credit - oh no. As the Interceptor leaves land far behind, your brother pops down to the galley to see what food's on offer. Typical teenage boy, he can't last an hour without stuffing his face. He brings some bread and wine up on deck - apparently his alter ego Norrington keeps the ship well stocked - and sits on a barrel up on the bridge to enjoy it.
Will approaches Jack and your brother with a determined look on his face. "I'm not a simpleton, Jack. You knew my father."
"So did I," your brother says through a mouthful.
Jack looks at your brother. "Did you now?"
"Bootstrap Bill?" your brother pauses, and then swallows his bread. "Nah, I didn't know him. Just pulling your leg." He tears off another chunk.
"Who is Bootstrap Bill?" Will demands. "He sounds like a pirate."
"Well, he is. And he's your dad, so get used to it mate," your brother says.
Jack winks. "I swear you look just like him."
"My father was Inot/I a pirate." Will pulls out his sword. You think that he is far too eager to fight, and also hope that your brother, whose only experience of fighting with a sword was when he owned a plastic one that came with flashing lights and swoopy noises, doesn't bother challenging him to a fight. You know, he is your brother after all.
"Oh, for crying out loud." Your brother takes a swig of his wine. "Give it a rest."
Will swings his sword at your brother. "What would you know, Norrington? You barely even know what's going on in the world outside that wig of yours."
Your brother reaches up to feel at his head. "My God, you're right, I'm wearing a wig." He pulls it off and chucks it overboard, then takes off about six layers of clothing till he's down to his shirtsleeves. "Much better. Thanks, Will."
Actually, you're surprised it took him that long to take the coat off, considering in the middle of winter he used to walk around the house with shorts on.
"No...problem," Will says uncertainly. Then he turns to Jack, who has been watching the entire proceedings with a grin, and threatens him with the sword. "My father was not a pirate!"
"And mine wasn't a merchant banker, but we've all got problems," Jack replies. "Can you sail under my command to find your lovely lass or do you want me to take you home to your mother? We can't sail this ship," gestures at your brother and himself, "all by our twosies."
"Twosies," Will repeats incredulously, then: "My mother's dead."
"Fine, then you shall stay. But pirate is in your blood, boy, and you'll realise that one day, soon enough."
"Soon enough, ya tosser," your brother says with a smile. "Are we going to sail into Tortuga, Jack?"
"We'll be there soon enough, Norrington mate," Jack says as he reaches for the wine bottle your brother is holding.
"I need a better name. How about Nozza, or Norro?"
You don't believe it. Your brother is asking for a nickname. Why doesn't he just use his own first name? Then you realise...he doesn't know what Norrington's first name is, and can't risk Will giving him a strange look as he announces that his name is George when it's Jim, or whatever. Still, he seems a bit of a tool asking for a nickname.
Jack looks at Will. "I like Nozza, what do you reckon?"
"What about Norrie?"
Jack and your brother both sigh in exasperation. "Well, Iyeah/I, if you want him to sound like a Igirl/I"
"Norro?"
"Norro's good for me, is it good for you?"
"Yeah, I quite like it."
"Yeah, all right," your brother says. "Call me Norro."
He borrows a knife from Jack and begins to cut off the bottom of his trousers. You clap one hand on your head as you realise he's introducing shorts into the uniform of the Royal Navy.
AN: next time: Tortuga!