Disclaimer: Tolkien created this wonderful world that I write in. He's the king and I'm just a pawn.
Author's Notes:
Please note that the summary of the story has been changed because the plot is slightly different to what I had expected. I only really expected to write one chapter and never write again because I didn't expect that I would get any reviews at all! Please review this is THE LONGEST chapter ever!
Kata Malfoy: I honestly don't know but I don't think I've gotten there yet. There is lots and lots more talking ahead so I'm not sure if you'll like this fic. A lost of the healing has to be psychological and this involves communication so that the problem can be resolved. This is why talking features a great deal…
Gershwhen: I know that Herendil is taking more of a different role. Its shows later on. This is a reason why I have changed the summary of this story.
Mr Padfoot: I promise that this fic will be finished before Christmas. But honestly, I don't really know where I'm going…it could end anytime I guess.
Elessar* Lover: I can' say much about the end. I haven't got there yet!
More Elrond…Legolas' thoughts are in italics.
The next morning, Legolas and Herendil awoke refreshed. They had their first night of restful sleep. They were able to alleviate their burdens on their heart. Legolas was still troubled but he felt a new sense of direction. Could it be hope?
He felt like having a bath. His bandages had been changed frequently over the last few days when he wasn't talking to Herendil or when he was resting. His physical wounds did not pain him much, but his back was still tender. The weals were closed and were now pink stripes. The dark bruises were now a fading purple-yellow. He wrist was almost healed and the split would probably be removed later today, he thought. Slowly he moved his dislocated shoulder. That is almost healed too. Legolas was excited as his recovery. It is faster than I thought. Perhaps the legendary healing powers of Imladris are real after all.
Legolas strode to the window, he could hear Herendil preparing himself in the bathroom. The young prince closed his eyes and inhaled the fresh scent of the trees. How I love the smell of the forest. It does remind me of home. Legolas caught himself before he could think about his father. No, I don't want to make myself sad. I won't cry. Legolas closed his eyes again, letting his thoughts wander into safer territory.
Unknowingly, the King of Mirkwood was doing the same. He was sitting in his throne room, gazing out the window. Thranduil was a strong man, he rarely doubted his decisions except this one. Why had he sent his son away? He found himself unable to answer this simple question. There was an uneasy feeling that was eating at his heart. Was it guilt? Thranduil tried to tell himself it wasn't. He couldn't weaken in his decisions. But it had been wrong and you shouldn't have hit him, his conscience told him.
Thranduil called his advisor to him. "Can you answer my question honestly? You know I trust you as my adviser, but also as a friend."
The advisor seemed nervous. "You faith in my opinion is undeserved, my Lord. I will answer the question as truthfully as I can, to the best of my ability."
"What do you think of me as a person?" Thranduil asked.
"As a person?" The advisor seemed surprised at the self-consciousness in the usually proud King's voice. The king sounded uncharacteristically doubtful. "I sincerely believe that you are a great King, my Lord. I'm not saying this to flatter you but you have made some great decisions that our people respect you for. You are seen as an elf with honour. I truly believe that you are a wonderful person." The advisor was confident in his answer.
Thranduil thanked his advisor and dismissed him. He was grateful for the frank opinion of his advisor. Yes, he was a great king but was he a great father? Would an elf with honour hit his own child? No one witnessed the scene between him and Legolas. It had been so long ago. It was the same scene that haunted him in his nightmares. I have made some great decisions, maybe so but I think I have made even greater mistakes. Thranduil felt the uneasiness inside him grow. It had been a mistake but didn't Legolas have to learn to be strong? That reason seemed less and less convincing to him now.
Herendil emerged from the bathroom, on seeing Legolas by the window he smiled. He was glad that Legolas was having some peace. He deserved it, Herendil thought. The sub-supervisor put away his things and made up both their beds quietly, he didn't want to disturb Legolas.
Some time later, a soft knock was at the door drawing both of the elves' attention. Legolas gave Herendil a quick question gaze. Herendil nodded and rose to open the door with Legolas behind him.
Elrond stood there, flanked by Glorfindel. "Good morning, Herendil and Legolas. I trust that you had a peaceful night's sleep?"
"Good morning. Yes, we did. We thank you for your wonderful hospitality," Herendil replied politely.
Elrond smiled at Legolas, who bowed in respect. The Elven Lord was glad to note that Legolas was becoming less shy and was acting more like an elfling. "Where would you like your breakfast today? Will you eat in the Great Hall?" Elrond asked.
Herendil looked at Legolas to consult his opinion. Legolas suddenly looked shy. Please don't make me eat in the Great Hall. Legolas seemed to look more like a timid child at the mention of meeting strangers, he held onto Herendil's robes as if trying to hide.
"I am deeply sorry that I must refuse your offer Elrond. I think we would be more comfortable here for the time being. Perhaps if Legolas were to be gradually introduced to the other guests and residents so it would not be as overwhelming? I am concerned that we might be unused to the customs here. We do not wish to offend anyone." Herendil suggested. He didn't want to push Legolas but he did want him to start meeting other elves. He shouldn't be afraid of his own kind, Herendil grieved silently. Legolas only seemed to shrink out of sight with his bashfulness.
Although Elrond was slightly disappointed, he didn't show it. The Elven Lord was gracious in his reply, "I understand. You do not need to be sorry. I will make sure personally that your breakfast arrives. It would be overwhelming to meet so many elves at once. What an excellent idea! Whenever Legolas feels up to it, I can give you a tour and introduce you to some of the other guests. The customs here are very similar to Mirkwood except that we do not really have titles and meals are less formal. Everyone eats together, we do not have separate places for the servants. Please make yourselves comfortable. I will return shortly after breakfast to discuss some matters of importance if you feel at ease with the arrangements."
"Thank you, Elrond. The arrangements are fine. We do appreciate your understanding. Legolas and I are at your service," Herendil offered. He was relieved that Elrond was not angry at his suggestion.
"As am I and my entire household," Elrond said with a respectful nod. This signalled the end of the conversation. He swiftly exited the room, the shimmering silk of his robes disappearing down the corridor.
After a sumptuous breakfast, Elrond returned alone to the Healing House.
"Herendil, perhaps it is more wise if Legolas gets his bandages changed now? I don't want to risk any infection. I will tend to you in the other room," Elrond suggested.
He doesn't want me to know something. I can feel it. It must have something to do with my fa- the King. Legolas complied, although his eyes betrayed his longing. I want to know what's going on! Why won't anyone tell me? Don't they think I can handle it? Legolas felt frustrated. He didn't want his bandages to be changed right now.
As the healer moved to remove his tunic Legolas snapped, "Don't touch me! I don't want to have my bandages changed!"
The healer wasn't surprised. He saw the look in Legolas' eyes when Herendil left. He assumed that Herendil was probably the child's father and that Legolas just wanted to be with his dad.
"There, there. Be a good child. You don't want your wounds to be infected do you? Come on. Let me change your bandages," the healer said with a sugary sweet voice.
Legolas fumed. "Don't talk to me like that! I'm not stupid!"
Meanwhile in the other room, Elrond was removing Herendil's stitches.
"The messengers will leave Imladris this afternoon. I was wondering if you wanted to write a letter to your King or do you prefer it if I did? I'm not sure that your King completely trusts me, seeing that the peace treaty is still being negotiated," Elrond explained, getting straight to the point."
"I understand. I will write a reply telling him of our extended stay and of the impending decision of the peace treaty. It is my duty to inform him of Ruthiun's death and I will do so accordingly," Herendil decided, "I wish to personally bring the message to the King of Mirkwood as is our customs. I feel that I am well enough to travel. I can bring the message to him myself."
"What about Legolas? You may have recovered sufficiently but I do not think that he should travel yet," Elrond objected. "He needs more time to recover. This is why I did not wish to discuss this matter in front of him. He does not seem to like the subject of death. Speaking of which, I though the Mirkwood custom only applied to family members, perhaps I am mistaken. I do not know your customs too well, I'm afraid."
"I have no intention of bringing Legolas with me. He does need more time. I can travel faster alone. Thank you for not discussing this. He is still young and this is the first time he has witnessed such a horrible thing. He should not have had to seem Ruthiun die…" Herendil paused. "Regarding the custom. Yes, it only applies to family members." After another pause he added softly, "Ruthiun was my foster brother."
"Which would make Githil your foster father?" Elrond had an amazing memory. Herendil was shocked that he had remembered, but then he is a great healer he thought.
"Yes," Herendil verified.
"When you first came here, I had to stitch your stomach. I noticed some scars on your back. If you do not mind me asking, how did you get such scars? I have some cream that can help with the scarring, although it will fade with time," Elrond said.
"Thank you for your offer…" Herendil said. "I got the scar…from a beating." He was starting to look very uneasy as if Elrond was intruding on a secret.
"Was it…was it Githil?" Elrond asked. He put two and two together, he had a strong suspicion he was right.
Herendil did not know how to answer. He was saved when he heard Legolas shouting in the other room.
In the other room the healer was coaxing Legolas as if he were only a baby, "Be a good little elf. I won't hurt you. Your daddy would be proud of you." The healer was hoping to placate Legolas, but he made the situation worse.
"I'm not a BABY! MY FATHER WOULD NEVER BE PROUD OF ME! YOU LIE!" Legolas was shouting himself hoarse. I won't cry. Why? Why me? Why can't my father love me the way I want him to?
Faster than the wind, Herendil was in the room. Legolas, in a storm of rage, ran off into the corridor. Herendil started to chase but was stopped by Elrond.
"Let me go, please," Herendil gritted his teeth in frustration.
"No. Let him calm down. It is safe in Imladris, no one will hurt him. Just let him have some room," Elrond persuaded.
Herendil relaxed and Elrond released his grip although he was still tense.
"What happened?" Elrond asked the healer.
The confused healer then told Elrond and Herendil what had happened. "And then the child got very distressed. I could see he really wanted to be with his father so I told him that his father would be proud of him. Then he got angry, he took it as an insult. I really don't understand. He said his father would never be proud of him and started to insult me."
"I'm not his father!" Herendil said. Then the full impact of the healer's words hit him. "You said, 'Your father would be proud of you.' Is this correct?"
"Yes." The healer was puzzled at why this was important.
"Oh Valar. What have you done?" Herendil gave the healer a glare. Elrond sensing that something was amiss sent the healer away.
"Why was Legolas so upset about his father?" Elrond asked Herendil.
Herendil replied, giving the least amount of information possible, "Because his father sent him away."
Elrond could still see that Herendil was worried. "He is safe. Legolas just needs some time to cool down. He will come back before you know it," Elrond said reassuringly. "Come, we will give him some time. We can go to my study so you can write the letter and prepare for your trip."
Herendil was uncertain but he accompanied Elrond anyway, even if it was to take the worry off his mind.
Sombrely, Herendil enter Elrond's study. The beauty of the room penetrated his dark mood. It was neat and tidy. It was not overly big but was cosy. The room was decorated with rich materials of deep velvety colours. A large wooden desk stood in the corner, nestled between many bookshelves filled with books about healing. Small trinkets lined the shelves. Herendil was amazed at the beauty of this room.
"Take a seat." Elrond motioned for Herendil to sit in a plush, red chair. There was a small tabletop next to the desk which had a quill and a parchment for Herendil to use. "You can use those to write your letter."
Herendil nodded his thanks and began to compose the letter. Occasionally his mind still drifted as he worried about Legolas' safety.
Elrond noticed that Herendil was distracted. The Elven Lord fel the same way but he hid it well. He was not worried about Legolas' safety because he was well informed about the happening inside Imladris. No, he was more concerned about the state of Legolas' mind. Elrond was alarmed at the way Legolas had been treated. He now suspected that Legolas had been hurt – very badly when his father sent him away. He wondered who Legolas' father was. Elrond suspected that he probably knew Legolas' father but he probably had not met him for some time – at least not in the recent millennia.
Herendil was only half-heartedly writing the letter, he too busy thinking of what Legolas was feeling. He sympathised with the young elfling. The poor kid, he doesn't need someone to remind him of his father! What about Elrond? I think he knows too much now…but I owe it to him to at least answer his questions. Memories flowed freely in Herendil's mind. Perhaps a burden told is a burden halved.
Out of the blue, Herendil's tongue talked for him. He was not really thinking, "It was Githil…"
Elrond was confused at the sudden revelation and then he remembered what they had been talking about earlier. He questioned softly, "Why?"
Herendil told him everything he had told Legolas, perhaps even more. The pain was too much for him. He had held it in him too long. Now all his disappointments and frustrations were surfacing. Legolas, the King, Ruthiun, his wounds, being hurt, being healed…It was too much for him. Everything wasn't meant to be this way.
"It's no shame to cry. Don't keep it all inside. Let the pain flow out. All your hurt, anger and sorrow. It has been too long since you've had someone to care for you," Elrond said kind-heartedly. He put his hand on Herendil's shoulder. "My friend."
Herendil turned away so Elrond would not see the tears forming in his eyes. He had never met such understanding. He had never felt such love – not romantic love, but love like a parent had for a child.
Elrond give Herendil some space, he would not watch the elf cry if he did not want him to. Inaudibly, he left the room so Herendil could release his sorrows alone.
Herendil did not hear Elrond leave. He was crying in earnest, without shame. The tears rolled down his face unchecked and unhindered, draining all the years of pain and guilt away.
Minutes and hours passed. It was now late afternoon and Herendil's worries returned. Legolas?! Where could he be! I must find him before I leave for Mirkwood! I must find him! Where is Lord Elrond?
Just as Herendil's patience threatened to give way, Elrond returned promptly.
"I must find him! I cannot leave before I talk to him!" Herendil said. He was tense.
"Relax, my friend. We will find him. Do not worry, it is not yet dark. You do not have to leave for Mirkwood yet. There is plenty of time. We can start searching from the corridors near the healing house," Elrond directed. His tone was authoritative but was not indifferent. He gave Herendil a comforting squeeze, to which Herendil gave a grateful nod.
Both elves felt that a change had occurred inside them, the first seeds of hope had been sown in their hearts. With this hope lingering in their minds, they set off in a swift pace to search for an elf they both cared for very much.
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