Title:
Too Much
Author: All Things Holy
Rating: PG
Character: Donna-centric
Email: fox_e_girl_7@hotmail.com, feedback is like candy
Disclaimer: Ha.
Summary: "She'll realize that was when she started to hear too much."
Spoilers: 18th and Potomac
She answers the phone. Almost manages to sound chipper this time. Filters out the sounds of people typing, talking, ordinary sounds of ordinary people doing this extraordinary job, manages to catch that Josh's 3 o'clock has to be rescheduled.
More sounds, only scratches of pencil on paper, should be lost in this chaotic din, but everything these days is over-exaggerated. Her smile, her laugh, all so close to fake she's shocked that no one's noticed, doesn't feel relieved when she's decided it's only because no one really cares.
"Donna!" bellowed over all the noise, she understands now why Josh feels the need to shout. Sound of heels on hardwood floor and she considers just standing still to make it stop. Keeps walking, she knew she would. Always walking, never really getting anywhere.
Stops in Josh's doorway, his voice like nails on a chalkboard and she's wondering when exactly she started to hate this so much, when waking up because a chore, the alarm clock like stab wounds, and even the sound of the running shower made her envy the deaf.
She contemplates, not for the first time, the reasons she does this job, has done this job, so well so long. She considers, not for the thousandth time, walking away and never coming back.
She hates the bullpen all of a sudden with ferocity and envies the senior staff their private offices. She wants a door, just wants the ability to turn some of this life around her down.
She'll realize eventually that it all started the day that Toby told her about the President's health. When she found out about the MS. She'll realize that was when she started to hear too much.
She has yet to learn that this, this job, these decisions she's made for herself, her life, this is one of those things you learn to regret over time.