DISCLAIMER: These Fruits Basket characters exist, but only thanks to the
great Takaya Natsuki, who if you think about it, is really talented to make
so many fantastic characters for everyone to fall in love with.
They're..beautiful..Miss Natsuki.*sniffle*.Thank you..*sniffle*
I'm.going..to cry now..
Val: YAY! Look, it's Ritsu! HI RITSU! *waves a little too enthusiastically*
Rei: Its not that great..
Val: *gets really big with evil glowing eyes* Yes..it is..
Rei: *Blinks* .
Ritsu: Hello! And who are you?
Val: MY NAME IS VAL! AND THIS IS..uh...um...errr...REI!
Rei: .Is my name that hard to remember?
Val: No, I just HAD to make an errrr before the word Rei cuz then it's like errrREI like Thunderbolt The Wonder Dog's bark..You know, Ruff ruff errrRUFF! From 101 Dalmatians 2? Y'know?
Rei: Whatever.
Momiji: Hi, you must be the newcomers I sensed coming with my amazing psychic powers, that, might I add, are neutral.
Rei: I'm sorry readers, but I can't come up with any snazzy catchphrase right now cuz I'm boring..so..stop staring at me..and reading this sentence..stop it..you're still there..LEAVE DAMMIT!
Ritsu: So, what are your names?
Val: I ALREADY TOLD YOU STUPID!!!!
Rei: .Do you have to act like that? You could just tell him again.It doesn't matter. I think you're overreacting..
Val: Oink! ^__^
Ritsu: I AM SO SORRY, I DIDN'T MEAN TO ASK AGAIN! IT ISN'T MY FAULT! WAIT, YES IT IS! I AM SUCH A HORRIBLE PERSON! I NEED TO SUFFER AND BURN IN HELL!!!!!
Val: *gasps* Ritsu...you said the H-Word..
Ritsu: NO!! I'M SO SORRY FOR MY BLASPHEMY!!!! I SHOULDN'T HAVE EVER OPENED MY MOUTH TO SPEAK!! I SHOULD BE BUSY DOING SOMETHING ELSE, LIKE DYING OR SOMETHING!!! AND FOR THOSE WHO SKIPPED THIS PARAGRAPH CUZ IT'S JUST A BUNCH OF RITSU NONSENSE, YOU'RE MISSING OUT ON THE SECRET SURPRISE I'M ABOUT TO GIVE THE READERS WHO ACTUALLY READ THIS!! HERE READERS HAVE A COOKIE!!!
Rei: *blinks* Readers..I'm not even going to ask.
Val: *looks up at sky* You mean..people are...reading us? Our every speech and movement is being written down or typed on a computer, and someone named Katie is reading this right now somewhere in the world? And in case there IS a Katie reading this, hi Katie! Isn't this a cool fic? We're actually addressing you from your name Katie! We're so interactive!
Hatori: *staring at Val wondering why she's talking to the sky*
Rei: Val.What are you doing? You're making yourself look really stupid..
Val: But I AM really stupid..
Rei: I know.
Momiji: Judging by my psychic intuition, there's a boy watching us from the bushes...His name is Li Syaoran, and he's from Cardcaptor Sakura! Which doesn't belong to the writers of this fic!
Hatori: *still doesn't understand the "fic" thing everyone's blabbering about*
Hiro: Um..Momiji...when'd you become psychic?
Momiji: Yesterday! ^__^
Hiro: Aren't people born with those?
Momiji: Not in my case!
Hiro: Whatever..
Li: *jumps out of the bushes* I watch you from my bush, Rei!
Hatori: Why? Why Rei? First she was the savior of Candy Land, now she has a stalker who hides in the bushes? I don't understand..
Rei: Neither do I, but that's okay! I have a Li!
Shigure: You..HAVE..a Li?
Rei: It appears that way.
Li: I shall stare at you from my bush, Rei. I don't care where you go..
Hatori: He's only talking in one-syllable words..
Li: Let's keep it that way, uh..Ha. San.
Hatori: How did you know my name? Or rather, my nickname?
Rei: Because.He's my Li.
Shigure: YOUR Li?
Rei: MY Li.
Li: HER Li.
Val: Okay, so what's going on? Do you know him?
Rei: No, but oh well. He's my Li now.
Li: I know you, though. I've watched you your whole life from my bush.
Val: You've been sitting in a bush your entire life watching Rei? What a boring waste of your time.
Rei: You're just jealous that I have a Li and you don't!
Val: No, not really..Wait a sec.why is their a person from CardCaptor Sakura in Fruits Basket world? And why does he follow YOU? *IS starting to get jealous she doesn't have a Li*
Rei: Because, he is MY Li.
Hatori: Fruits Basket world? What's that?
Val: Okay, you guys are all from a Japanese cartoon called Fruits Basket where Tohru's the main characters and you guys are just a bunch of side- characters who she helps with their sorrows.
Hatori: Huh?
Val: In other words, you play NO role in the story except to be bishies.
Hatori: *is confused now*
Li: ......What is that word you speak of? What does it mean?
Val: Huh? Bishie? It's short for bishonen, it means hot guy...Why? Can you not say the word cuz it has more than one syllable?
Rei: Leave my Li alone!!
Li: Yeah, leave me...leave me be.
Val: C'mon Syllable Boy! Say "Bishie"!
Li: Cute boy.
Val: ARGH! NO! SAY BISHONEN!
Li: Hot guy.
Val: Aah, forget it..Okay, can we go see Akito now?
Rei: *Eyes widen* Why?
Val: Cuz if we're being sucked into the Fruits Basket world, what if we only have a limited amount of time here? I want to give him a hug and tell him he's kawaii!
Rei: Can I not come?
Li: *clings to Rei's leg* Don't go. You can't. I must stalk you, but I don't want to go in the Main House and leave my bush.
Rei: Yeah! Don't make me leave my Li!! *Hugs her Li*
Val: Li's a dirty rotten pervert!
Li: What? Why?
Val: Because, obviously, if this is the first time he's ever clinged to your leg before going inside where there aren't bushes, then obviously in the past he's hidden somewhere like a bush outside your window to watch you. Even when you're taking a shower!
Rei: .
Li: ..No. I don't watch when she bathes. I close my eyes. But I am in a bush by the glass paned hole in the wall that light comes through.
Val: Just say window.
Li: No. That is too long.
Val: Whatever..Anyways, let's go visit Akito! Please! Please!
Hatori: I don't..want to go though..
Val: Hatori, you can't say you aren't coming just because your name means Temple Pigeon! Come on! Let's go!
Hatori: .....But I never used that as an excuse.
Val: So? It would make a good excuse.
Hatori: No, not really.
Val: I wanna see Akito! *bursts into tears*
Rei: *Clings to her Li* I don't want to see Akito! You cant make me!!
Val: But I HAVE to see Akito..I am his ultimate fan! *pulls out action figures and magazines and posters and a T-Shirt that says "I Luv God" and a gigantic and I mean GIGANTIC stuffed Akito plushie that's about 4 feet tall*
Hatori: Wow...Um...who manufactures these goods?
Val: Dorothy in Kansas.
Hatori: What?
Val: Gosh, if I'm gonna have to repeat myself then why say anything at all? *huggles 4 foot tall Akito plushie*
Rei: No.I am not going to see Akito...You know very well I am afraid of him..
Val: Well I'm not, all the more reason to go.
Hatori: What makes you Queen?
Val: Cuz my birthday's next month. *sticks tongue out at Hatori*
Hatori: *is about to say that doesn't make sense at all but stops himself* Fine..let's go.
Rei: Li! I don't want to go!! *Clings to her Li again*
Li: Rei does not want to go, she should not have to. I will stay here with her and wait for you to come back.
Val: Okay, we'll bring Akito back to you! Like a pizza delivery! Okay?
Rei: No.Leave me alone! I don't want to see him!!
Akito: ...Why?
Rei: *Jumps a little* I..um..I wanted to stay with my Li.
Akito: *has a slice of pizza and is very content* Who's Li? And who are you? Mmm, pepperoni! ^__^
Rei: I'm Rei.
Akito: Last name?
Rei: My last name is *a truck speeds by with a bad muffler* Yep. That's my last name. *Bows*
Akito: *is having the pizza slide, if anyone knows what that is* Okay..um...can you go away now? You're an outsider.
Val: *big sparkly eyes* WOW! AKITO SOHMA! HELLLLOOOOOO! *clings to akito's arm* I love you! ^___^
Akito: *blinks*
Val: Ewww, you're having the pizza slide.
Akito: ..What's a pizza slide?
Val: When the cheese and sauce and stuff all dribbles down out of your mouth onto your chin and then goes on your shirt and ruins your clothes and- --
Akito: *really has no mess at all* Um...no I'm not.
Val: DON'T ARGUE WITH ME YOUNG MAN! *swats Akito's nose* BAD!
Rei: *eyes widen and clings to her Li in fear of an angry Akito* ....
Akito: WHAT WAS THAT FOR?! YOU HAD NO REASON TO DO THAT, YOU OUTSIDER, YOU, YOU---
Val: DON'T YELL AT ME LIKE THAT! BAD BAD BAD! For all you kids at home, here's a tip. When your dog or Akito is bad, swat it on the nose! NOW BEHAVE YOUNG MAN! *swats Akito on the nose*
Akito: *is stupefied* .....You just.you..
Val: THAT'S RIGHT, NOW SHUT UP! I love you! ^__^
Akito: O__O
Rei: *Is VERY nervous right now and clinging to her Li.Still* ...
Li: Do not be scared Rei. You can cling all you want, I don't mind. This guy can be quite mean, but I will not let him hurt you.
Val: He won't be mean while I'm around, ^_^, RIGHT AKITO? *turns to Akito*
Akito: *shakes head quickly* O.O
Val: Good boy. *puts akito on a leash* Let's go for a walk around to meet the other Sohmas everyone! ^___^ I just love meeting new people!
Rei: Um.Okay.*is still a little nervous but now clinging to her Li's arm* Let's.Um.Let's go.
Val: Okay, Akito, down on all fours like a puppy! ^__^
Akito: No. I don't want to.
Val: DO IT!! NOW!!!! *yanks on the leash*
Akito: *is practically choked* Fine.fine..let's go.*goes on all fours*
Val: Yay! ^_^
~THEY ALL WALK PLEASANTLY DOWN THE PATH WHEN THEY MEET UP WITH KISA SOHMA~
Hiro: Kisa! Hi! I want you to meet Rei and Val, Shigure's adopting them!
Kisa: Shigure's adopting you? That's nice. *smiles then jumps a foot in the air* Wh.why do you have Akito on a leash? On all fours?
Akito: -__-
Val: Because he's my dogie! Git along little dogie! *kicks Akito in the rear*
Akito: *moves forward*
Val: Good dogie. ^_^
Rei: *Blinks and lets go of her Li* Hello Kisa, it's nice to meet you. *Clings to her Li's arm again* And this is my Li.
Li: Hi young girl.
Kisa: My name's Kisa Sohma, if you didn't know already.
Li: I can't say that.
Kisa: Why not? It's a short and easy name to say!
Rei: Oh, my Li only says one syllable words! Right Li?
Li: Yeah.
Kisa: Okay..um..here, I assume I've the first girl you've met, judging by there's only boys following you. ^_^ I'll introduce you to the other two girls in the Zodiac.
Akito: *wants to kill Kisa for mentioning the Zodiac in front of two outsiders plus a Li*
Kisa: *understands Akito's murderous glare* Um, the Zodiac Club I mean.it's a little.uh.club-thingy we Sohmas made..
Li: Club? Cool.
Val: Don't worry, Akito, we already know about the Curse. You don't have to worry about us telling anyone about it.
Li: Hm? Curse? What Curse?
Rei: Nothing ,my Li, just forget about it.
Li: All right then. I will.
~AT RIN AND KAGURA'S HOUSE~
Rin: Hi.
Kagura: Hello, I'm Kagura, this is Rin. We knew you were coming because Momiji told us with his psychic powers. We're planning on joining his brainwashing psychic cult next week.
Rin: You don't tell people that.
Kagura: Okay. I won't.
Rin: It's too late now, you already did.
Akito: I have to go to the bathroom...
Val: *hisses* YOU'RE A DOG DAMMIT! PEE ON A FIRE HYDRANT!!
Akito: There aren't any fire hydrants around, and I wouldn't urinate on one anyway.
Val: Well then go in the bushes!
Li: No! Don't pee in my bush! It is my bush!
Rei: NOT THE BUSH! THAT IS MY LI'S BUSH!! *Clings to Li's arm again*
Akito: Well, can you please let me off this leash so I can find a bathroom?
Val: NO! YOU SHALL STAY UNTIL I SAY YOU CAN GO!
Rin: She's a lot like you and Kyo, Kagura.
Kagura: What? You think so?
Rin: Mm-hmm.
Rei: *looks to Val* You're insane..You're YELLING at Akito...
Akito: *realizes that suddenly* You're right! How dare you! You aren't allowed to yell at me! I am the Sohma Head! I AM THE LEADER! You'RE JUST AN OUTSIDER! *decides to attack the closest person, which just so happens to be Rei cuz she's the one that has all the events happen to her like the Li and the Gingerbread Men*
Rei: *eyes widen* Why me!? Why not Val!? She is the one who was doing it!
Val: Well you're special!
Akito: NO! YUKI'S SPECIAL! *attacks Val*
Val: I feel loved. ^__^ I'm being attacked by THE Akito...THE...THE...
Kyo: Uh, why are you saying THE like it's some amazing word? Why not Akito?
Val: Because THE is God..
Akito: I'M GOD!
Val: I DON'T CARE! GET BACK ON YOUR LEASH, DOGIE!
Akito: NO!
Val: YOU'D BETTER LISTEN TO ME!
Akito: YOU'D BETTER LISTEN TO ME!
Val: YOU'D BETTER---*notices Hiro exists* Oh, Hiro! ^___^ Kawaii! *gives Hiro a noogie*
Yuki: He was here since almost the beginning...You didn't notice him?
Val: The Beginning of Time? WOW! ETERNAL HIRO! *pets Hiro and shoves a grape in his mouth* EAT IT!
Hiro: *trying to escape* Why?!
Val: BECAUSE YOU'RE MY SECOND FAVORITE FRUITS BASKET CHARACTER!!!!
Hiro: *is confused and has been petted too hard so he passes out*
Val: N.no...Hiro.I.I.I killed him...Hiro...
Hiro: @_@
Rei: *Is VERY scared because she was just attacked so she is clinging to her Li* ..........
Li: Calm down. It's all right. He did not hurt you.
Val: *pets Hiro hoping that the Pet Of Life will resurrect him*
Hatori: He's just knocked out. He'll be fine...you shouldn't uh..pet him so hard..
Val: REALLY? Thank you for advising me against my overly-painful pettings! *hugs Hatori*
Hatori: *turns into a seahorse* Why did you hug me?
Val: Oops...
Li: He has turned int-
Rei: Yes I see that..
Val: Careful Li, you almost said "into"! COUNT THE SYLLABLES!
Li: *counts silently on his fingers and gasps* No! You are right! Rei cut me off so I did not say a long word! You saved me Rei! Thank you!
Rei: You are welcome.
Val: *points to Yuki* AND YOU ARE WILLARD!!!!
Yuki: Uh...*stares at Val's pointing finger* I..am? Who is Willard?
Val: *remembers that Fruits Basket takes place in the year 1999, when Willard hadn't come out yet*
Rei: Willard is a guy that has a bunch of rats! I love rats! ^_^
Yuki: *edges away from the Rei who just burst out cackling at her love of rats*
Val: *tackles yuki* WILLY WILLARD!!!!!!
Yuki: Ack! Why?!
Val: DON'T ABOMINATE ME WILLARD!!!!!!
Yuki: Huh?
Rei: *stops cackling* Abomma what?
Val: Ah, never mind...HEY! WHERE'S MY BEAUTIFUL DOGIE?!!
Akito: *is running away at the speed of a zooming akito, which isn't very fast*
Val: *runs up at like 70 MPH* COME BACK TO ME DOGIE!!!!
Akito: *is...pant..almost..pant..there..the...guy's..bathroom*
Val: DOGIE!!!!!!!!!
Akito: *hides in the guy's bathroom, THINKING he'll be safe in here*
Val: DON'T ABANDON ME DOGIE! *runs in the guy's bathroom*
Everyone Outside The Bathroom: *hears silence*
Val: EEEEEK! *runs out and hides behind Shigure*
Akito: *pops his head out the door and sticks his tongue out at Val*
Val: *throws a rock at Akito's head*
Akito: *has been hit by a five-ton rock*
Hatori: Shigure, take Rei, Val, Li, and the others back to your house..I'll take care of Akito..
Akito: *is sitting there with swirly eyes*
~AT SHIGURE'S HOUSE~
Tohru: Oh, hello there! ^__^
Rei: Hello I'm Rei, this is Val, and THIS.*Grabs Li and waves him in front of Tohru, Li wobbling like flubbery jelly, or it might just APPEAR that way like that pencil trick* ...is my Li. *pulls Li away from Tohru and strokes his head* My Li.^_^ *Hugs her Li and then clings to him* ^_^
Shigure: You see, Tohru, these three are going to be living with us for awhile..we're adopting them, so to speak.
Tohru: Oh wow, that's great! I hope to become friends with both of you!
Rei: Yeah, and my Li too. ^_^
Val: *will NOT talk because she doesn't have her Dogie*
Kyo: Uh, where will they sleep?
Shigure: Tohru's room. I'll just put some sleeping bags on the floor for now.
Tohru: Oh, how wonderful! We can have an all-girl slumber party!
Rei: NO! THAT'S WRONG! Its an all-girl PLUS a Li Slumber party! Right Li? *Hugs her Li*
Li: *yawns* Right Rei...
Shigure: No, Li won't be sleeping in a room with three girls, he'll be outside watching...from his bush..
Li: My bush? Oh yes! Do not be scared, Rei, I will watch you all from my bush!
Rei: Okay my Li! ^___^
Val: *notices Rei's a lot more perkier when her Li is around* ...
Yuki: What's wrong, Miss Val?
Val: I want my Dogie! *bursts into tears*
Val: So, did you like it? Read and Review plz! We love your reviews, even if you flame us! ^__^
Rei: Whatever.Where is my Li?! *is in a bad mood and wants her Li*
Val: Li went back to CardCaptor Sakura world until the next chapter...but it's okay...I threw a rock at my Dogie! I hope he's okay!
Rei: I hope my Li is okay!
Val and Rei: *hug each other crying*
Val: YAY! Look, it's Ritsu! HI RITSU! *waves a little too enthusiastically*
Rei: Its not that great..
Val: *gets really big with evil glowing eyes* Yes..it is..
Rei: *Blinks* .
Ritsu: Hello! And who are you?
Val: MY NAME IS VAL! AND THIS IS..uh...um...errr...REI!
Rei: .Is my name that hard to remember?
Val: No, I just HAD to make an errrr before the word Rei cuz then it's like errrREI like Thunderbolt The Wonder Dog's bark..You know, Ruff ruff errrRUFF! From 101 Dalmatians 2? Y'know?
Rei: Whatever.
Momiji: Hi, you must be the newcomers I sensed coming with my amazing psychic powers, that, might I add, are neutral.
Rei: I'm sorry readers, but I can't come up with any snazzy catchphrase right now cuz I'm boring..so..stop staring at me..and reading this sentence..stop it..you're still there..LEAVE DAMMIT!
Ritsu: So, what are your names?
Val: I ALREADY TOLD YOU STUPID!!!!
Rei: .Do you have to act like that? You could just tell him again.It doesn't matter. I think you're overreacting..
Val: Oink! ^__^
Ritsu: I AM SO SORRY, I DIDN'T MEAN TO ASK AGAIN! IT ISN'T MY FAULT! WAIT, YES IT IS! I AM SUCH A HORRIBLE PERSON! I NEED TO SUFFER AND BURN IN HELL!!!!!
Val: *gasps* Ritsu...you said the H-Word..
Ritsu: NO!! I'M SO SORRY FOR MY BLASPHEMY!!!! I SHOULDN'T HAVE EVER OPENED MY MOUTH TO SPEAK!! I SHOULD BE BUSY DOING SOMETHING ELSE, LIKE DYING OR SOMETHING!!! AND FOR THOSE WHO SKIPPED THIS PARAGRAPH CUZ IT'S JUST A BUNCH OF RITSU NONSENSE, YOU'RE MISSING OUT ON THE SECRET SURPRISE I'M ABOUT TO GIVE THE READERS WHO ACTUALLY READ THIS!! HERE READERS HAVE A COOKIE!!!
Rei: *blinks* Readers..I'm not even going to ask.
Val: *looks up at sky* You mean..people are...reading us? Our every speech and movement is being written down or typed on a computer, and someone named Katie is reading this right now somewhere in the world? And in case there IS a Katie reading this, hi Katie! Isn't this a cool fic? We're actually addressing you from your name Katie! We're so interactive!
Hatori: *staring at Val wondering why she's talking to the sky*
Rei: Val.What are you doing? You're making yourself look really stupid..
Val: But I AM really stupid..
Rei: I know.
Momiji: Judging by my psychic intuition, there's a boy watching us from the bushes...His name is Li Syaoran, and he's from Cardcaptor Sakura! Which doesn't belong to the writers of this fic!
Hatori: *still doesn't understand the "fic" thing everyone's blabbering about*
Hiro: Um..Momiji...when'd you become psychic?
Momiji: Yesterday! ^__^
Hiro: Aren't people born with those?
Momiji: Not in my case!
Hiro: Whatever..
Li: *jumps out of the bushes* I watch you from my bush, Rei!
Hatori: Why? Why Rei? First she was the savior of Candy Land, now she has a stalker who hides in the bushes? I don't understand..
Rei: Neither do I, but that's okay! I have a Li!
Shigure: You..HAVE..a Li?
Rei: It appears that way.
Li: I shall stare at you from my bush, Rei. I don't care where you go..
Hatori: He's only talking in one-syllable words..
Li: Let's keep it that way, uh..Ha. San.
Hatori: How did you know my name? Or rather, my nickname?
Rei: Because.He's my Li.
Shigure: YOUR Li?
Rei: MY Li.
Li: HER Li.
Val: Okay, so what's going on? Do you know him?
Rei: No, but oh well. He's my Li now.
Li: I know you, though. I've watched you your whole life from my bush.
Val: You've been sitting in a bush your entire life watching Rei? What a boring waste of your time.
Rei: You're just jealous that I have a Li and you don't!
Val: No, not really..Wait a sec.why is their a person from CardCaptor Sakura in Fruits Basket world? And why does he follow YOU? *IS starting to get jealous she doesn't have a Li*
Rei: Because, he is MY Li.
Hatori: Fruits Basket world? What's that?
Val: Okay, you guys are all from a Japanese cartoon called Fruits Basket where Tohru's the main characters and you guys are just a bunch of side- characters who she helps with their sorrows.
Hatori: Huh?
Val: In other words, you play NO role in the story except to be bishies.
Hatori: *is confused now*
Li: ......What is that word you speak of? What does it mean?
Val: Huh? Bishie? It's short for bishonen, it means hot guy...Why? Can you not say the word cuz it has more than one syllable?
Rei: Leave my Li alone!!
Li: Yeah, leave me...leave me be.
Val: C'mon Syllable Boy! Say "Bishie"!
Li: Cute boy.
Val: ARGH! NO! SAY BISHONEN!
Li: Hot guy.
Val: Aah, forget it..Okay, can we go see Akito now?
Rei: *Eyes widen* Why?
Val: Cuz if we're being sucked into the Fruits Basket world, what if we only have a limited amount of time here? I want to give him a hug and tell him he's kawaii!
Rei: Can I not come?
Li: *clings to Rei's leg* Don't go. You can't. I must stalk you, but I don't want to go in the Main House and leave my bush.
Rei: Yeah! Don't make me leave my Li!! *Hugs her Li*
Val: Li's a dirty rotten pervert!
Li: What? Why?
Val: Because, obviously, if this is the first time he's ever clinged to your leg before going inside where there aren't bushes, then obviously in the past he's hidden somewhere like a bush outside your window to watch you. Even when you're taking a shower!
Rei: .
Li: ..No. I don't watch when she bathes. I close my eyes. But I am in a bush by the glass paned hole in the wall that light comes through.
Val: Just say window.
Li: No. That is too long.
Val: Whatever..Anyways, let's go visit Akito! Please! Please!
Hatori: I don't..want to go though..
Val: Hatori, you can't say you aren't coming just because your name means Temple Pigeon! Come on! Let's go!
Hatori: .....But I never used that as an excuse.
Val: So? It would make a good excuse.
Hatori: No, not really.
Val: I wanna see Akito! *bursts into tears*
Rei: *Clings to her Li* I don't want to see Akito! You cant make me!!
Val: But I HAVE to see Akito..I am his ultimate fan! *pulls out action figures and magazines and posters and a T-Shirt that says "I Luv God" and a gigantic and I mean GIGANTIC stuffed Akito plushie that's about 4 feet tall*
Hatori: Wow...Um...who manufactures these goods?
Val: Dorothy in Kansas.
Hatori: What?
Val: Gosh, if I'm gonna have to repeat myself then why say anything at all? *huggles 4 foot tall Akito plushie*
Rei: No.I am not going to see Akito...You know very well I am afraid of him..
Val: Well I'm not, all the more reason to go.
Hatori: What makes you Queen?
Val: Cuz my birthday's next month. *sticks tongue out at Hatori*
Hatori: *is about to say that doesn't make sense at all but stops himself* Fine..let's go.
Rei: Li! I don't want to go!! *Clings to her Li again*
Li: Rei does not want to go, she should not have to. I will stay here with her and wait for you to come back.
Val: Okay, we'll bring Akito back to you! Like a pizza delivery! Okay?
Rei: No.Leave me alone! I don't want to see him!!
Akito: ...Why?
Rei: *Jumps a little* I..um..I wanted to stay with my Li.
Akito: *has a slice of pizza and is very content* Who's Li? And who are you? Mmm, pepperoni! ^__^
Rei: I'm Rei.
Akito: Last name?
Rei: My last name is *a truck speeds by with a bad muffler* Yep. That's my last name. *Bows*
Akito: *is having the pizza slide, if anyone knows what that is* Okay..um...can you go away now? You're an outsider.
Val: *big sparkly eyes* WOW! AKITO SOHMA! HELLLLOOOOOO! *clings to akito's arm* I love you! ^___^
Akito: *blinks*
Val: Ewww, you're having the pizza slide.
Akito: ..What's a pizza slide?
Val: When the cheese and sauce and stuff all dribbles down out of your mouth onto your chin and then goes on your shirt and ruins your clothes and- --
Akito: *really has no mess at all* Um...no I'm not.
Val: DON'T ARGUE WITH ME YOUNG MAN! *swats Akito's nose* BAD!
Rei: *eyes widen and clings to her Li in fear of an angry Akito* ....
Akito: WHAT WAS THAT FOR?! YOU HAD NO REASON TO DO THAT, YOU OUTSIDER, YOU, YOU---
Val: DON'T YELL AT ME LIKE THAT! BAD BAD BAD! For all you kids at home, here's a tip. When your dog or Akito is bad, swat it on the nose! NOW BEHAVE YOUNG MAN! *swats Akito on the nose*
Akito: *is stupefied* .....You just.you..
Val: THAT'S RIGHT, NOW SHUT UP! I love you! ^__^
Akito: O__O
Rei: *Is VERY nervous right now and clinging to her Li.Still* ...
Li: Do not be scared Rei. You can cling all you want, I don't mind. This guy can be quite mean, but I will not let him hurt you.
Val: He won't be mean while I'm around, ^_^, RIGHT AKITO? *turns to Akito*
Akito: *shakes head quickly* O.O
Val: Good boy. *puts akito on a leash* Let's go for a walk around to meet the other Sohmas everyone! ^___^ I just love meeting new people!
Rei: Um.Okay.*is still a little nervous but now clinging to her Li's arm* Let's.Um.Let's go.
Val: Okay, Akito, down on all fours like a puppy! ^__^
Akito: No. I don't want to.
Val: DO IT!! NOW!!!! *yanks on the leash*
Akito: *is practically choked* Fine.fine..let's go.*goes on all fours*
Val: Yay! ^_^
~THEY ALL WALK PLEASANTLY DOWN THE PATH WHEN THEY MEET UP WITH KISA SOHMA~
Hiro: Kisa! Hi! I want you to meet Rei and Val, Shigure's adopting them!
Kisa: Shigure's adopting you? That's nice. *smiles then jumps a foot in the air* Wh.why do you have Akito on a leash? On all fours?
Akito: -__-
Val: Because he's my dogie! Git along little dogie! *kicks Akito in the rear*
Akito: *moves forward*
Val: Good dogie. ^_^
Rei: *Blinks and lets go of her Li* Hello Kisa, it's nice to meet you. *Clings to her Li's arm again* And this is my Li.
Li: Hi young girl.
Kisa: My name's Kisa Sohma, if you didn't know already.
Li: I can't say that.
Kisa: Why not? It's a short and easy name to say!
Rei: Oh, my Li only says one syllable words! Right Li?
Li: Yeah.
Kisa: Okay..um..here, I assume I've the first girl you've met, judging by there's only boys following you. ^_^ I'll introduce you to the other two girls in the Zodiac.
Akito: *wants to kill Kisa for mentioning the Zodiac in front of two outsiders plus a Li*
Kisa: *understands Akito's murderous glare* Um, the Zodiac Club I mean.it's a little.uh.club-thingy we Sohmas made..
Li: Club? Cool.
Val: Don't worry, Akito, we already know about the Curse. You don't have to worry about us telling anyone about it.
Li: Hm? Curse? What Curse?
Rei: Nothing ,my Li, just forget about it.
Li: All right then. I will.
~AT RIN AND KAGURA'S HOUSE~
Rin: Hi.
Kagura: Hello, I'm Kagura, this is Rin. We knew you were coming because Momiji told us with his psychic powers. We're planning on joining his brainwashing psychic cult next week.
Rin: You don't tell people that.
Kagura: Okay. I won't.
Rin: It's too late now, you already did.
Akito: I have to go to the bathroom...
Val: *hisses* YOU'RE A DOG DAMMIT! PEE ON A FIRE HYDRANT!!
Akito: There aren't any fire hydrants around, and I wouldn't urinate on one anyway.
Val: Well then go in the bushes!
Li: No! Don't pee in my bush! It is my bush!
Rei: NOT THE BUSH! THAT IS MY LI'S BUSH!! *Clings to Li's arm again*
Akito: Well, can you please let me off this leash so I can find a bathroom?
Val: NO! YOU SHALL STAY UNTIL I SAY YOU CAN GO!
Rin: She's a lot like you and Kyo, Kagura.
Kagura: What? You think so?
Rin: Mm-hmm.
Rei: *looks to Val* You're insane..You're YELLING at Akito...
Akito: *realizes that suddenly* You're right! How dare you! You aren't allowed to yell at me! I am the Sohma Head! I AM THE LEADER! You'RE JUST AN OUTSIDER! *decides to attack the closest person, which just so happens to be Rei cuz she's the one that has all the events happen to her like the Li and the Gingerbread Men*
Rei: *eyes widen* Why me!? Why not Val!? She is the one who was doing it!
Val: Well you're special!
Akito: NO! YUKI'S SPECIAL! *attacks Val*
Val: I feel loved. ^__^ I'm being attacked by THE Akito...THE...THE...
Kyo: Uh, why are you saying THE like it's some amazing word? Why not Akito?
Val: Because THE is God..
Akito: I'M GOD!
Val: I DON'T CARE! GET BACK ON YOUR LEASH, DOGIE!
Akito: NO!
Val: YOU'D BETTER LISTEN TO ME!
Akito: YOU'D BETTER LISTEN TO ME!
Val: YOU'D BETTER---*notices Hiro exists* Oh, Hiro! ^___^ Kawaii! *gives Hiro a noogie*
Yuki: He was here since almost the beginning...You didn't notice him?
Val: The Beginning of Time? WOW! ETERNAL HIRO! *pets Hiro and shoves a grape in his mouth* EAT IT!
Hiro: *trying to escape* Why?!
Val: BECAUSE YOU'RE MY SECOND FAVORITE FRUITS BASKET CHARACTER!!!!
Hiro: *is confused and has been petted too hard so he passes out*
Val: N.no...Hiro.I.I.I killed him...Hiro...
Hiro: @_@
Rei: *Is VERY scared because she was just attacked so she is clinging to her Li* ..........
Li: Calm down. It's all right. He did not hurt you.
Val: *pets Hiro hoping that the Pet Of Life will resurrect him*
Hatori: He's just knocked out. He'll be fine...you shouldn't uh..pet him so hard..
Val: REALLY? Thank you for advising me against my overly-painful pettings! *hugs Hatori*
Hatori: *turns into a seahorse* Why did you hug me?
Val: Oops...
Li: He has turned int-
Rei: Yes I see that..
Val: Careful Li, you almost said "into"! COUNT THE SYLLABLES!
Li: *counts silently on his fingers and gasps* No! You are right! Rei cut me off so I did not say a long word! You saved me Rei! Thank you!
Rei: You are welcome.
Val: *points to Yuki* AND YOU ARE WILLARD!!!!
Yuki: Uh...*stares at Val's pointing finger* I..am? Who is Willard?
Val: *remembers that Fruits Basket takes place in the year 1999, when Willard hadn't come out yet*
Rei: Willard is a guy that has a bunch of rats! I love rats! ^_^
Yuki: *edges away from the Rei who just burst out cackling at her love of rats*
Val: *tackles yuki* WILLY WILLARD!!!!!!
Yuki: Ack! Why?!
Val: DON'T ABOMINATE ME WILLARD!!!!!!
Yuki: Huh?
Rei: *stops cackling* Abomma what?
Val: Ah, never mind...HEY! WHERE'S MY BEAUTIFUL DOGIE?!!
Akito: *is running away at the speed of a zooming akito, which isn't very fast*
Val: *runs up at like 70 MPH* COME BACK TO ME DOGIE!!!!
Akito: *is...pant..almost..pant..there..the...guy's..bathroom*
Val: DOGIE!!!!!!!!!
Akito: *hides in the guy's bathroom, THINKING he'll be safe in here*
Val: DON'T ABANDON ME DOGIE! *runs in the guy's bathroom*
Everyone Outside The Bathroom: *hears silence*
Val: EEEEEK! *runs out and hides behind Shigure*
Akito: *pops his head out the door and sticks his tongue out at Val*
Val: *throws a rock at Akito's head*
Akito: *has been hit by a five-ton rock*
Hatori: Shigure, take Rei, Val, Li, and the others back to your house..I'll take care of Akito..
Akito: *is sitting there with swirly eyes*
~AT SHIGURE'S HOUSE~
Tohru: Oh, hello there! ^__^
Rei: Hello I'm Rei, this is Val, and THIS.*Grabs Li and waves him in front of Tohru, Li wobbling like flubbery jelly, or it might just APPEAR that way like that pencil trick* ...is my Li. *pulls Li away from Tohru and strokes his head* My Li.^_^ *Hugs her Li and then clings to him* ^_^
Shigure: You see, Tohru, these three are going to be living with us for awhile..we're adopting them, so to speak.
Tohru: Oh wow, that's great! I hope to become friends with both of you!
Rei: Yeah, and my Li too. ^_^
Val: *will NOT talk because she doesn't have her Dogie*
Kyo: Uh, where will they sleep?
Shigure: Tohru's room. I'll just put some sleeping bags on the floor for now.
Tohru: Oh, how wonderful! We can have an all-girl slumber party!
Rei: NO! THAT'S WRONG! Its an all-girl PLUS a Li Slumber party! Right Li? *Hugs her Li*
Li: *yawns* Right Rei...
Shigure: No, Li won't be sleeping in a room with three girls, he'll be outside watching...from his bush..
Li: My bush? Oh yes! Do not be scared, Rei, I will watch you all from my bush!
Rei: Okay my Li! ^___^
Val: *notices Rei's a lot more perkier when her Li is around* ...
Yuki: What's wrong, Miss Val?
Val: I want my Dogie! *bursts into tears*
Val: So, did you like it? Read and Review plz! We love your reviews, even if you flame us! ^__^
Rei: Whatever.Where is my Li?! *is in a bad mood and wants her Li*
Val: Li went back to CardCaptor Sakura world until the next chapter...but it's okay...I threw a rock at my Dogie! I hope he's okay!
Rei: I hope my Li is okay!
Val and Rei: *hug each other crying*