A Rose By Any Other Name.
By Kes.
Disclaimer: You know it, I know it, so let's just get on with the story…
"You want us to end it?" Hermione asked in disbelief. She could not even consider that it was happening. "But why?" She looked puzzled, apparently not taking in any of Albus' speech. "Don't you want us to be happy?" She sounded so young and looked like she was about to cry.
Albus sighed. "Of course I do…it's just that the safety of the school and students is paramount." He looked at her sympathetically. "If the Daily Prophet or the Ministry ever found out, the school would be in danger…"
Severus muttered something incomprehensible and shifted in his chair.
Albus leaned forward. "Pardon?"
Severus looked at him darkly. "I said 'bullshit'". He kept eye contact until Albus looked away.
When Severus actually swears instead of a sarcastic put down, it usually means he's in a lot of pain, is very tired, or exceedingly annoyed…to put it mildly. Oh dear.
Before Albus could respond, Severus began to speak in such a calm voice it disturbed him.
"All my life, I have been denied what I've wished for. First, the desire to have a normal life and a normal family. Denied to me by my own father. Then, denied the right to have a mother, again denied by the bastard who killed her, my father. Then the desire to have friends, to be liked and admired. Denied by a snot-nosed little brat who thought he was better than the rest because he knew a couple of hexes and had Lily Evans eating out of his hand - aka, James Potter with followers Peter Pettigrew and Sirius Black.
All I've ever wanted is to be myself, to live a so-called 'normal' life. Even when I came to you to repent my sins and attempt to live again, you took that from me. You forced me - via guilt and a subconscious obligation to you – to do your bidding. Return to the Dark. Kill more people than I can remember, yet I still see their faces. For the good of the light, for the cause. You think this reasoning helps their souls rest? Well it doesn't help mine either.
I have been continually denied what I want, what I need to survive. For the good of others, for the 'many'. I've accepted that. It didn't hurt anyone but me. What was the harm, right? Only one person affected. But now you're asking me to relinquish the one person who actually likes me for me. Not because I'm useful to her, or because she fears me, but because she, hopefully, loves me. Fine. I will, once again, deny myself happiness for the good of the people who neither like me nor know me, and who, if they ever found out about my sacrifices, would not even give me a second glance." He looked at Hermione and got up. "I'm sorry my love. 'It is for the good of the many'" Beginning sincerely, and ending in a mocking tone, and now once again sincere. "I love you. I really do. More than I ever thought possible." He bent down and kissed her gently, silencing her with his kiss.
He rose swiftly, and made his way to the door. He looked at a flabbergasted Hermione and a remorseful Albus. He glared at the elderly man and opened the door and slammed it behind him, but not before saying.
"Merry bloody Christmas."