He was going to leave. He actually was going to leave. A thousand
thoughts ran through his head - sadness, fear, torture, but mostly guilt.
Guilt. He felt guilty for planning to leave her. They were once happy. They
thought they had everything planned. Everything was so perfect. They were
deeply in love and they were trying for a baby. Nothing could have made him
happier. Then that one phone call changed his life.
~*flashback: 3 months earlier*~
(Chandler on the phone) Hello? Oh hi, Dr. Connelly. No, she's not here, but you know, I can tell her. Should I be sitting down for this? (Smile fades) Oh. (Pause) Well, so what does that mean? (Pause) Okay. Ok, thank you, thanks.
~*present*~
He hated that phone call. He wished he never found out, that he and Monica had kids, that this wasn't something to worry about. But it was. This was real. He had to deal with it. He just wished he didn't have to put Monica through it too.
~*Flashback, the same day three months earlier*~
Chandler: Well, we're gonna.we're gonna figure this out.
Monica: I know.
~*present*~
That was a lie. They couldn't figure it out. It was too hard. Everything was so complicated.
After the call they still had hope, there was still a small chance. But now, everyday that hope seemed to chip away, until there was none left. They tried anything to help them, but nothing worked. And he and Monica were falling apart.
He knew babies were all she ever thought about. It was on her mind 24/7, at work, hanging out with her friends, even in the bedroom. He could see it in her eyes too. Every time she looked at Emma, or any other baby for that matter, she had this twinkle in her eyes. It was like she wanted a baby so bad, but she knew that would never happen for her.
So she started shutting him out of her life. And now he didn't know how to comfort her, or even talk to her. And he knew it was all his fault.
Monica always wanted kids. Ever since he could remember, she would always talk about them. And she was made to be a mother. She had those motherly instincts. She knew just how to handle kids, and it seemed like all children loved her.
So why did this have to happen to her - to them? He thought god had finally forgiven him for all the crap he did as a kid. Why did God want to cause him more pain? And Monica?
He knew it wasn't fair, not just for him, but Monica.
And now he hated himself. He hated the fact that he put Monica through this.
So he finally came to a decision. He was going to leave her. He caused everyone too much pain, especially Monica. He hoped she would find someone else to love and have kids with, because he couldn't give her that. Hell, maybe she should just go back to Richard, he loved her, and maybe he had changed his mind about kids. I mean, he did say he loved her on the night he was going to propose. But he didn't really care about that right now. He just hoped that after he left, Monica would remember the good things about him, the things that made her happy. He wished she'd remember the way he used to be. Remember the way he loved her.
~*flashback: 3 months earlier*~
(Chandler on the phone) Hello? Oh hi, Dr. Connelly. No, she's not here, but you know, I can tell her. Should I be sitting down for this? (Smile fades) Oh. (Pause) Well, so what does that mean? (Pause) Okay. Ok, thank you, thanks.
~*present*~
He hated that phone call. He wished he never found out, that he and Monica had kids, that this wasn't something to worry about. But it was. This was real. He had to deal with it. He just wished he didn't have to put Monica through it too.
~*Flashback, the same day three months earlier*~
Chandler: Well, we're gonna.we're gonna figure this out.
Monica: I know.
~*present*~
That was a lie. They couldn't figure it out. It was too hard. Everything was so complicated.
After the call they still had hope, there was still a small chance. But now, everyday that hope seemed to chip away, until there was none left. They tried anything to help them, but nothing worked. And he and Monica were falling apart.
He knew babies were all she ever thought about. It was on her mind 24/7, at work, hanging out with her friends, even in the bedroom. He could see it in her eyes too. Every time she looked at Emma, or any other baby for that matter, she had this twinkle in her eyes. It was like she wanted a baby so bad, but she knew that would never happen for her.
So she started shutting him out of her life. And now he didn't know how to comfort her, or even talk to her. And he knew it was all his fault.
Monica always wanted kids. Ever since he could remember, she would always talk about them. And she was made to be a mother. She had those motherly instincts. She knew just how to handle kids, and it seemed like all children loved her.
So why did this have to happen to her - to them? He thought god had finally forgiven him for all the crap he did as a kid. Why did God want to cause him more pain? And Monica?
He knew it wasn't fair, not just for him, but Monica.
And now he hated himself. He hated the fact that he put Monica through this.
So he finally came to a decision. He was going to leave her. He caused everyone too much pain, especially Monica. He hoped she would find someone else to love and have kids with, because he couldn't give her that. Hell, maybe she should just go back to Richard, he loved her, and maybe he had changed his mind about kids. I mean, he did say he loved her on the night he was going to propose. But he didn't really care about that right now. He just hoped that after he left, Monica would remember the good things about him, the things that made her happy. He wished she'd remember the way he used to be. Remember the way he loved her.