Chapter 2: SOS: Save Our Show!
I kept humming that catchy "skidoo" theme as I got into the tub to take my bath. After a few miles of hiking through a neighborhood that suddenly turned from 3D to 2D, I was more than ready for a soothing and refreshing bath. The bar of soap waiting on the soapdish was white but had no name labeled on it, so I wasn't really sure what brand it was. It smelled pretty nice. But as I leaned back and washed with the soap, I thought I heard the soap very quietly singing to one of Eminem's songs...and pretty badly, too.
"I'm slim Slippery, yes I'm the real Slippery, all you other Slipperies are just...imitating! So won't the real Slippery please stand up, please stand up, please stand up?"
Of course, I stood up. Not only did I stand up, but I shot up and slammed the soap back onto the dish, and faintly hearing a "MMPH!" right after. I jumped out of the tub and almost slipped running to the bathroom mirror, and I turned on the faucet in the bathroom sink to splash my face.
"I like Eminem, but I'm not going to listen to a bar of soap for entertainment," I whispered to myself. "Hmmm...schizophrenia DOES run through my family..." Thankfully as I brushed my hair, I found out that the brush couldn't talk. Neither could the toothbrush...oh, wait a minute, I was using my own. Thank the Lord I packed to come here. I slipped on my velvety sky blue PJ's with silver stars on them and put my furry blue slippers under the bed's edge for in the morning, and I realized how much my "fashionable" sleepwear clashed with the balloon-print wallpaper. There was a mobile made of spoons hanging in the window. I slipped under the covers and turned off the lamp, then tried to sleep.
"Good night, Devon," I thought I heard the bedside clock whisper...
The clock was nice that night, but the next morning...
A very loud alarm was going off as the clock shouted in my ear. Her voice was similar to that of my P.E. coach suffering PMS.
"WAKE UP, YOU LOSER! IT'S TIME TO ROCK AND ROLL! GET OUT OF THE BED! GET READY FOR TODAY, BECAUSE YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK!" After the fifth "YOU SUCK", the clock suddenly went bye-bye in a fiery explosion. The only thing that I could assume about the clock was that the clock said a certain number of "YOU SUCK"s to indicate the hour, so it was about 5 a.m. Oh boy. I slowly got out of bed and put on my fuzzy pink robe and used two feathery black ponytail holders to get my long golden hair into a couple of ponytails. Then I walked into the living room.
"Huh?" I said when I saw a note laying on the giant red armchair. I picked up the note and sat on the chair to read it. Why did I get a tingle up my spine when I sat there?
Anyway, the note read:
Dear Devon,
I'm sorry I've left on such short notice, but I've decided to finally actually pursue my music career. I'm hitting the road to do a little soul- searching for some good lyrics. Please make sure to take care of Blue while I'm gone...which is going to be for a while.
--Steve Burns
I sighed. I already had a house, even though I'm just 14, along with a dog to take care of, plus talking household items to avoid. But as I read the last line of his letter...
"Hi, there!"
"AHH!" I squealed and jumped. I looked up from the note and saw a Steve look-alike, except he wore an orange shirt with squares. "Who the heck are you?"
"I'm Steve's little brother, Joe! He asked me to host the show while he was gone." He shook my hand. "You must be Devon, right? Steve told me all about you."
"Yeah, I'm Devon," I responded as I slowly realized what show I was on...
"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! I'm on Blue's Clues!!!!" I screamed in horror. I tried to escape by running out through the half of the house that was chopped off to reveal the interior to the viewers, but I rammed smack into a glass wall.
"OW!!! Why is there a glass wall here???" I frantically asked.
"That's actually there to protect the cast members if a crazy little preschooler tries to get on the set," Joe explained.
I sighed again. "Great. Steve moved the house into the TV studio. I'm stuck in a studio."
"Oh, lighten up, Devon," Joe said as he set some scrambled eggs out on the table. "After this one episode, we'll talk to the director and the producers and see about getting you out of here to your parents."
I tried some of the scrambled eggs, which tasted like cardboard, but all I said was, "Okay, one episode. Then we find my parents."
"All RIGHT!" Joe shouted and grinned, then started singing this moronic song. "Devon's going to play with us, Devon's going to play with us, Devon's going to play with us, wonder what we'll do!" Joe stopped singing and dancing and whispered to Blue, "Say Blue, what WERE we supposed to be doing in this episode? I forgot to check the script."
Blue shrugged with her ears and said in doggy-talk, "I don't know---"
"OHHHHH NOOOOOO!!!!!" one of the producers cried. He charged toward us and shattered the glass wall. He caught his breath.
"Oh, look, children, it's our friend, Mr. Producer!" Joe enthusiastically exclaimed.
"Hi, Mr. Producer!" the preschooler audience said in unison.
"What's the problem, Mr. Producer?" I asked as I took a bite of scrambled cardboard.
Mr. Producer stopped bawling for a few minutes. "It's a financial crisis," he moaned. "We're losing viewers. Our ratings are rising like a lead balloon."
Joe suddenly lost his idiotic grin and said, "That's horrible. What's going to happen to our show?"
"Well, if the few loyal kids right out there in the audience don't like this episode, everyone will quit watching the show. We're already broke, but we'll go bankrupt if this happens! We may even have to cancel the show..."
Joe nearly choked. "CANCEL THE SHOW?!? Are you nuts?? My older brother Steve had another career to turn to. I don't. What am I gonna tell my mom when she sees me like this?"
"I can't believe I'm saying this, but we have to save the show!" I exclaimed pounding my fist on the table. The table rattled a little.
"Hey, watch it!" griped Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper.
"Sorry," I said sheepishly. "But we have to save the show. I have little cousins who love the show. My friends have little brothers and sisters who are hardcore fans of Blue's Clues. How can we disappoint them by canceling it?"
"Hear, hear. Devon's right," said Mr. Producer.
"Right on, Devon!" Joe shouted, regaining his usual happy self. "But how are we going to save the show?"
"Woof! Woof!" Blue barked, looking out the window, then slapping her familiar paw print onto the suddenly rebuilt glass screen.
Joe jumped up and snapped his fingers. "That's it! THAT'S IT! We'll play Blue's Clues to figure out what Blue found that can save our show!"
"Of course!" I said. "Being a teenager, I usually don't do these things, but it's for a good cause."
"We could do that," said Mr. Producer. "But in the quest to save our show, this better interest the viewers, Burns."
"Oh, this is going to be our most interesting episode, believe me," reassured Joe.
"You can count on it!" I agreed.
"Woof!" replied Blue.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Not the Blue's Clues episode you expected, huh? This is going to turn exciting. Read the third chapter when I have it up! By the way, Devon's kind of based off of me.
I kept humming that catchy "skidoo" theme as I got into the tub to take my bath. After a few miles of hiking through a neighborhood that suddenly turned from 3D to 2D, I was more than ready for a soothing and refreshing bath. The bar of soap waiting on the soapdish was white but had no name labeled on it, so I wasn't really sure what brand it was. It smelled pretty nice. But as I leaned back and washed with the soap, I thought I heard the soap very quietly singing to one of Eminem's songs...and pretty badly, too.
"I'm slim Slippery, yes I'm the real Slippery, all you other Slipperies are just...imitating! So won't the real Slippery please stand up, please stand up, please stand up?"
Of course, I stood up. Not only did I stand up, but I shot up and slammed the soap back onto the dish, and faintly hearing a "MMPH!" right after. I jumped out of the tub and almost slipped running to the bathroom mirror, and I turned on the faucet in the bathroom sink to splash my face.
"I like Eminem, but I'm not going to listen to a bar of soap for entertainment," I whispered to myself. "Hmmm...schizophrenia DOES run through my family..." Thankfully as I brushed my hair, I found out that the brush couldn't talk. Neither could the toothbrush...oh, wait a minute, I was using my own. Thank the Lord I packed to come here. I slipped on my velvety sky blue PJ's with silver stars on them and put my furry blue slippers under the bed's edge for in the morning, and I realized how much my "fashionable" sleepwear clashed with the balloon-print wallpaper. There was a mobile made of spoons hanging in the window. I slipped under the covers and turned off the lamp, then tried to sleep.
"Good night, Devon," I thought I heard the bedside clock whisper...
The clock was nice that night, but the next morning...
A very loud alarm was going off as the clock shouted in my ear. Her voice was similar to that of my P.E. coach suffering PMS.
"WAKE UP, YOU LOSER! IT'S TIME TO ROCK AND ROLL! GET OUT OF THE BED! GET READY FOR TODAY, BECAUSE YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK!" After the fifth "YOU SUCK", the clock suddenly went bye-bye in a fiery explosion. The only thing that I could assume about the clock was that the clock said a certain number of "YOU SUCK"s to indicate the hour, so it was about 5 a.m. Oh boy. I slowly got out of bed and put on my fuzzy pink robe and used two feathery black ponytail holders to get my long golden hair into a couple of ponytails. Then I walked into the living room.
"Huh?" I said when I saw a note laying on the giant red armchair. I picked up the note and sat on the chair to read it. Why did I get a tingle up my spine when I sat there?
Anyway, the note read:
Dear Devon,
I'm sorry I've left on such short notice, but I've decided to finally actually pursue my music career. I'm hitting the road to do a little soul- searching for some good lyrics. Please make sure to take care of Blue while I'm gone...which is going to be for a while.
--Steve Burns
I sighed. I already had a house, even though I'm just 14, along with a dog to take care of, plus talking household items to avoid. But as I read the last line of his letter...
"Hi, there!"
"AHH!" I squealed and jumped. I looked up from the note and saw a Steve look-alike, except he wore an orange shirt with squares. "Who the heck are you?"
"I'm Steve's little brother, Joe! He asked me to host the show while he was gone." He shook my hand. "You must be Devon, right? Steve told me all about you."
"Yeah, I'm Devon," I responded as I slowly realized what show I was on...
"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! I'm on Blue's Clues!!!!" I screamed in horror. I tried to escape by running out through the half of the house that was chopped off to reveal the interior to the viewers, but I rammed smack into a glass wall.
"OW!!! Why is there a glass wall here???" I frantically asked.
"That's actually there to protect the cast members if a crazy little preschooler tries to get on the set," Joe explained.
I sighed again. "Great. Steve moved the house into the TV studio. I'm stuck in a studio."
"Oh, lighten up, Devon," Joe said as he set some scrambled eggs out on the table. "After this one episode, we'll talk to the director and the producers and see about getting you out of here to your parents."
I tried some of the scrambled eggs, which tasted like cardboard, but all I said was, "Okay, one episode. Then we find my parents."
"All RIGHT!" Joe shouted and grinned, then started singing this moronic song. "Devon's going to play with us, Devon's going to play with us, Devon's going to play with us, wonder what we'll do!" Joe stopped singing and dancing and whispered to Blue, "Say Blue, what WERE we supposed to be doing in this episode? I forgot to check the script."
Blue shrugged with her ears and said in doggy-talk, "I don't know---"
"OHHHHH NOOOOOO!!!!!" one of the producers cried. He charged toward us and shattered the glass wall. He caught his breath.
"Oh, look, children, it's our friend, Mr. Producer!" Joe enthusiastically exclaimed.
"Hi, Mr. Producer!" the preschooler audience said in unison.
"What's the problem, Mr. Producer?" I asked as I took a bite of scrambled cardboard.
Mr. Producer stopped bawling for a few minutes. "It's a financial crisis," he moaned. "We're losing viewers. Our ratings are rising like a lead balloon."
Joe suddenly lost his idiotic grin and said, "That's horrible. What's going to happen to our show?"
"Well, if the few loyal kids right out there in the audience don't like this episode, everyone will quit watching the show. We're already broke, but we'll go bankrupt if this happens! We may even have to cancel the show..."
Joe nearly choked. "CANCEL THE SHOW?!? Are you nuts?? My older brother Steve had another career to turn to. I don't. What am I gonna tell my mom when she sees me like this?"
"I can't believe I'm saying this, but we have to save the show!" I exclaimed pounding my fist on the table. The table rattled a little.
"Hey, watch it!" griped Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper.
"Sorry," I said sheepishly. "But we have to save the show. I have little cousins who love the show. My friends have little brothers and sisters who are hardcore fans of Blue's Clues. How can we disappoint them by canceling it?"
"Hear, hear. Devon's right," said Mr. Producer.
"Right on, Devon!" Joe shouted, regaining his usual happy self. "But how are we going to save the show?"
"Woof! Woof!" Blue barked, looking out the window, then slapping her familiar paw print onto the suddenly rebuilt glass screen.
Joe jumped up and snapped his fingers. "That's it! THAT'S IT! We'll play Blue's Clues to figure out what Blue found that can save our show!"
"Of course!" I said. "Being a teenager, I usually don't do these things, but it's for a good cause."
"We could do that," said Mr. Producer. "But in the quest to save our show, this better interest the viewers, Burns."
"Oh, this is going to be our most interesting episode, believe me," reassured Joe.
"You can count on it!" I agreed.
"Woof!" replied Blue.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Not the Blue's Clues episode you expected, huh? This is going to turn exciting. Read the third chapter when I have it up! By the way, Devon's kind of based off of me.