Moria

:: They skate down the mountain and to the entrance.

Gimli: The doors of Moria

Legolas: ( sarcastically) well obviously, what does it look like

Gandalf: Quiet! The inscription on the door says " Speak friend and enter"

Gimli: which means to speak the password it you're a friend

Legalos: and what in Middle Earth is the password

Gimli: um... I forgot

:: Legolas rolls his eyes. Meanwhile Gandalf has tried every password possible

Matthias: Actually, if you ask me, we're making a bigger deal of this than it really is. What's Elvish for Friend

Gandalf says it and the doors swings open\

Gandalf: Man, how did you figure that out so quick

Matthias: Well it was easier than the I-am that is riddle( glares at Martin)

Martin: ( turning red) Hey! I was desperate

:: everyone walks inside. Pippen throws a stone into the water which disturbs the watcher and it grabs Frodo

Frodo: Ahhhhhhh!!! Help me people!!!!

Mariel: ( starting to battle madly with her gullwacker) well don't just stand there!

:: The rest of the fellowship attacks. Everyone with swords slashes everything, Gonff organizes a dagger throwing squad with the hobbits, Legalos and Grath are shooting arrows side by side and Mariel is crazily whacking everything with the Gullwacker until the watcher drops Frodo.

Dandin: well that was a close one

:: Gandalf lights up his staff and leads the way deeper into Moria

Gonff: (starting to sing) This is the sooong that never ends. It just goes on and on my friend.

Merry and Pippen: ( catching on) Some Hobbits started singing it not knowing what it was

And now they keep on singing it forever just because...

:: repeats until Dandin walks up to them

Dandin: Hey let me try( singing) I know a song that gets on Mariel's nerves, Mariel's nerves, Mariel's nerves. I know a song that gets on Mariel's nerves and this is how it goes.

:: Continues until Mariel swings her Gullwacker threateningly They continue walking into Moria

Gandalf: Interesting, I have no memory of this place

Brocktree: (starts getting bloodwrathy) now you tell us!!!!!

Frodo: um... something's following us

Gandalf: I know, it's Gollum, but don't hurt him. I foresee that he'll have an important part to play in the future

Mariel: ( knocks Gollum out with her Gullwacker) well that should keep him down for a while

Gandalf: Come on! Let's get going

:: Everyone follows him into the Tomb of Records

Merry, Pippen, Gonff and Dandin: ( starting to sing again) I know a song that gets on Gandalf's nerves, Gandalf's nerves, Gandalf's nerves... opps

:: Pippen knocks the skeleton into the pit

Gandalf: Fool of a Took! Throw yourself into the next pit to rid us of your stupidity

:: Rumbling starts. Borimir inspects the door and is almost shot by two arrows

Borimir: Now that's what I call lousy aim ( he and Tagg bar the door)

:: Gonff, Merry and Pippen forms a dagger throwing squad, Frodo, Mariel, Dandin and Sam get into a fighting-square, Grath and Legalos load their bows, Gimli and Brocktree draw their weapons out and Martin, Aragorn, Borimir, Gandalf, Matthias, Tagg and Triss draw their swords... trolls break through the doors

Redwall warriors: Redwalllll!!!! Eulaliaaaaaaa!!!!! Death on the wind!!! (throws themselves at the trolls and starts fighting madly

LOTR people: Charrrrrrge!!! ( also starts fighting)

Gonff, Merry and Pippen: ( starting to chant while throwing unlimited daggers) WE ARE THE FELLOWSHIP, THE MIGHTY, MIGHTY FELLOWSHIP!!!!!

Mariel: ( to Dandin) your great- grandfather is weird( whacks the troll with her Gullwacker, knocking it out)

Dandin: not as weird as Frodo's cousins ( stabs another troll)

Frodo: Actually, I have to agree with you

Martin : Compared to wild cats, trolls are nothing

Triss: This is a lot like fighting snakes in Brockhall

Brocktree: ( from the other side of the chamber) There were SNAKES in Brockhall!?!

Triss: Yep

Grath: Legolas, you dropped an arrow

Legolas: Darn, I had a perfect record for a hundred years

Grath: Okaaay

:: Gonff, Merry and Pippen had discovered that their unlimited supply of daggers wasn't that unlimited after all. Martin was halfway through with stabbing an orc, Aragorn had just beheaded one, Triss and the rest of the champions had just formed a fighting circle and were wreaking havoc, Brocktree was swinging an orc around and was causing considerable damage, Gimli was standing on Brocktree's shoulder and was whacking the approaching orcs with his axe, Boromir was screaming at an orc for making a chip in his horn, Mariel and Dandin were fighting back to back, Sam was hiding behind a huge pillar, and Frodo was seconds away from being stabbed.

Frodo: A little help here?

Dandin: (stopping the troll's club) you owe me for that one

Legolas: (shoots at the troll and misses) Man you're bad luck to me Grath! That was the first time I missed in a millennia

Grath: ( kills the troll) Heh heh!

:: leaves the room and are immediately surrounded by more orcs

Brocktree: Yay!!! More orcs( laughs crazily)

Triss: What's that stomping noise

Gandalf: It's the Balrog ( all the orcs run away)

Brocktree: Darn!

Gandalf: quick! we need to make it to the bridge of Kazal-dum ( looks at Broctree) NOW!!!

:: The Fellowship runs to the bridge everyone jumps across except Gandalf, who stayed to fight

Gandalf: YOU MAY NOT PASS!!!!

Frodo: ( in cheerleading voice and waving pom-poms) Go Gandalf! Go Gandalf!

Mariel: ( to Frodo) I'll bet you 10 dollars it'll pass

:: The Balrog roars and charges. Gandalf makes part of the bridge collapse and the Balrog falls in. Just when Gandalf turns to walk away, the Balrog pulls him in too.

Frodo: NOOOOO!!!!!!!! GANDALF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mariel: Ten dollars please. But don't worry, he'll come back more powerful than ever.

Aragorn: In that case, let's get out of here. (Everyone walks out)