**
His only way out: Part Seven**
She called the number as soon as she got home, well, after she sat down and let it all sink in. The hotel was in Boston. She would go there.
The Jeep was warm. Lorelai wound down the window and let the fresh air blow across her motionless face.
The voice of the male radio announcer filled the car. "It's 5.43 on this sunny Saturday afternoon and it looks to be . . ." she hit the off button. The wind picked up slightly. She sighed and tried to think about what she felt about this whole situation. So what did he tell me again? Lets just get this whole thing straight. 'The person I can't be away from his standing in front of me.' Okay. How did I make him feel this way?
She pondered. Arrghh! How am I supposed to know? He's my friend . . . so I guess I act friendly. There's a start. So we have acting friendly. But he acts friendly to me! Well not when he doesn't give me coffee, he's just plain mean. So, he acts friendly to me, but I could live without him. I think. Come to think about it I probably couldn't cause I'd be taken over by a severe case of coffee deprivation . . . and I wouldn't have anyone to complain to, although Rory is only a phone call away; she is pretty busy. I wonder if he meant 'I couldn't live without you' like, I cant live without you because my business would go bust? No, if he was gonna leave he wouldn't have a business. Ahh! What did he mean? Maybe I'm reading too much into it. She sat concentrating on the road, trying to avoid what her mind came to. Maybe he meant it as in 'I cant live without you' because. . . I love you? That sounds scary. Luke in love with me sounds scary. I can't picture Luke in love. He has a weird way of showing it if he was in love with me . . . if he is in love with me. Luke's in love with me. Is he? She asked herself questions she couldn't really answer or was too scared to answer. But do I love him? She shivered at the thought, but she didn't know if it was a bad or good shiver. She was finally going to confront this. What the hell is love anyway, I mean who can really define love?! Okay, um, let's have an example. I love coffee! Hm, coffee. I can't be away from coffee. Coffee makes me happy. Coffee keeps me relatively sane. Coffee has a great taste. Coffee can keep me awake . . . Coffee . . . She swallowed hard and compared coffee to Luke, they had no difference. Coffee is Luke . . .
She felt a knot form in her stomach. The realization happened, as her face paled slightly. She swallowed hard and took a deep breath. "I'm in love with Luke." She said quietly. "It's Luke." She relaxed a fraction and half smiled before she sank her back into the seat. "Luke."
**
Lorelai pulled into the driveway. She was there. And so was Luke. It was just after dark. She pulled her overnight back from the back seat and locked the Jeep. She walked towards the doors after seeing Luke's truck parked in one of the spaces. The night manager was waiting patiently at the desk as Lorelai approached.
She smiled briefly, "Hi, um, I'm Lorelai Gilmore, I was wondering if you had a room available?"
"I will just check for you." The night manager flipped open the book and ran her finger down the page. "Yes we do, room 6. Can I book you in?"
"Thank you." Lorelai looked around and held onto her bag.
"Can I get someone to help you with your bag?"
"No thanks I'm fine." She handed Lorelai her key.
"Just take the elevator to ground one and turn left. Enjoy your stay and remember that the restaurant opens sharply at six for breakfast."
Lorelai smiled and pointed her finger, "Thanks again."
After setting everything up in her room she took a shower. The pit in her stomach still remained and would probably stay until she spoke with Luke. After drying off she chose something to wear. She felt weird. She never really wanted to look exceptional for Luke. But here she was. Nothing flashy though, just jeans and a white frilly top. Her hair was down and fell just above her shoulders. She looked herself over in the mirror. Calm down she told herself. She took a breath and walked out into the hall in search of room 3. It couldn't be far away. She stood out front of her door and looked at the numbers of the surrounding rooms, knowing it would soon see it. It was across the hall. Luke's room.
She raised her hand, ready to knock. It took her a few seconds to get the courage. She took a deep breath and put her other hand on her head before she knocked. A short while later she heard footsteps and her heart began to beat a little louder. The door opened. There he was.
His eyes widened and he seemed to step back a little before he choked out, "Lorelai?"
"Hey." She said softly and shifted her feet. She looked him over without being too obvious. He had jeans and one if his shirts that he usually wore under his flannel. She smiled weakly.
"Ah, what, what are you doing here. And how did you know I was here?" he stammered and put his hand on the doorknob.
"Well that's funny, I was going to ask you the same thing, what are you doing here?" She took a step forward so she wasn't talking to him from the hall.
Luke looked strong, "You should go." He began to shut the door but she held it open.
"I need to talk."
"Nothing needs to be said, Lorelai, go home."
"Luke, please, I was just shocked."
"It doesn't matter anymore okay, let's just drop it."
"It can't be dropped, please can I just come in a explain to you?"
"Explain what?"
"Explain to you what needs to be explained." It hurt him to see her standing there, with that look on her face. He wanted to know what she wanted to say all right. He stood out of the way of the door and she walked in. He closed it behind her.
"What?"
"Okay um." She brushed her hair back with one hand. "The entire drive here gave me some time to think about what you said to me and what it meant. So first of all I thought it could've been because you'd lose out on money cause I'm your number one coffee customer at the diner, and well, with that possibly being half true, I didn't think that's what you meant." She paused scared to go on, she met with his eyes quickly before she looked around.
Luke looked at her and raised his eyes brows for her to continue. "And?"
"And- I don't know, this is really hard I've never thought of you this way."
"Then don't, it doesn't matter anymore." Luke interrupted and Lorelai put her hand on her chest.
"No! Luke! Just let me get this out! This is all happening so fast. I mean last night I didn't even sleep cause I was trying to figure out what I was feeling, which was a complete waste of non-sleep because I don't even know what the feeling I have is called until I figured it out in the stupid car! And now I wanna tell you." She breathed heavily from yelling.
Luke looked slightly stunned. "Go ahead."
"Thank you." She took a breath. "Like I was saying, the thought of you and me was just- I got scared, but after I thought about it in the car on the ride here I finally figured out and I'm having trouble myself believing . . . believing that," she sighed, "Believing that I might possibly feel the same." She let out a breath she was holding and shut her eyes momentarily before she opened them and met his eyes. She felt tears burning her eyes from all the emotion. "Luke?"
He walked slowly over to the couch and sat down, resting his elbows on his knees and putting his hands over his face. He really wanted to believe her. He had to.
"Luke?" she prompted as she took a few steps toward the couch. She looked around nervously before she brought her gaze back to him, "Say something?" she said. He removed his hands and she slapped herself mentally, that was the exact thing he said to her.
He stood up again, "How do I know you're telling the truth?"
She looked taken aback, she wasn't expecting that question. She blinked her eyes wanting to say something but was too shocked to get it out. That hurt her.
He saw the look on her face and stepped forward. "Lorelai."
She stepped back. "No Luke! I wouldn't stand here and tell you something that wasn't true. I thought you knew me better than that! Learn something new everyday!" With that she turned around and left slamming the door behind her.
"Lorelai!" He didn't know if he should go after her. He wasn't real good at chasing. He dropped his head slightly towards the floor. I've done it now.
**