iNsAnE kIrBy ScHtUfF
Chapter 1:the war against teletubbies
Disclaimer: I do not own Kirby, or teletubbies, or Yoda, or tingle (THANK GOD!). So there. But I do own colorb and wattchamacallit.
It was a beautiful day in dreamland. Kirby and king dedede were fighting, it was really really stormy, and all of king dedede's minions were out getting drunk off their asses. okay, so it wasn't so beautiful. any ways since I, the author, don't feel like writing a battle scene, I'll just say that king dedede gets his ass kicked.
King dedede:(runs away)
Kirby: finally, I beat him. time to go pig out! (Kirby runs off, only to run into two other creatures. the first one looked like Kirby, only he didn't have any arms or a mouth, and it was yellow and had 3 lightning bolt-shaped horns and had a wire with an electrical plug on the end for a tail. the second creature looked like an armless and legless Kirby also, but he had paint splotches covering his entire body, and had a pencil tail and a paintbrush and had 2 light blue paint splotches on the tips of his feet.)
first creature: hey, watch where you're going!
Kirby :who are you guys and where are you from?
first creature: I'm wattchamacallit.
second creature: and I'm colorb(as in color orb.)
both: and we're here because the author put us here!
Kirby: Author? wait a minute. you mean I'm in ANOTHER fic?!
colorb: yes.
Kirby: Is this author insane?
wattchamacallit: yes.
Kirby: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
wattchamacallit: Don't worry, the author is trapped behind the fourth wall, so he can't interact with this world physically.
Kirby: Can I see?
colorb: sure, come on. (so they went and they came upon a bubble-like wall with a very large snowball behind the wall)
Colorb: Here we are.
Kirby: Um..that wall looks very weak.
Colorb: Don't worry, the wall won't break unless you mention something about the author, like "the author is very stupid"(suddenly realizes what he did) OH.CRAP. (the wall ripples and shatters, causing the snowball to roll down the hill at the trio. they dodge the snowball and it stops.
K,W,&C: whew. (the snowball explodes, covering them in snow and revealing a creature that looks like ice dragon except it is very small, isn't as fat, doesn't have the jaggedy teeth things, and is blueish-green)
Kirby: YOU'RE the author?!!
Me: I am not JUST "the author"! I am (very loud echoey voice) CHIBI ICE DRAGON!!!(runs off)
Wattchamacallit: great, now this fic is going to get insane. (scene change to king dedede's castle)
King dedede: perfect. I can't defeat Kirby and neither can any monster.(gets into his chair and presses the button for the N.M.E screen to come up)
King dedede: N.M.E guy, I none of your monsters can beat Kirby. I want the most powerfulest monster you have. most.powerfulest...
N.M.E guy: I have a name you know. It's faggot.
King dedede:(trying to hold in laughter) that's ..very nice...
Faggot: there is a form you have to sign. (reading)the signer of this contract agrees to blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah...
24 hours later. blah blah blah blah-
king dedede: LISTEN, YOU LAWYER-LIKE PERSON!!!I WANT YOUR STRONGEST MONSTER RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!
Faggot :okay,okay! (sends monster) (big zappity lightning affects)(the zappity stuff clears revealing... THE TELETUBBIES!!!(DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENGGGG!!!!!!!!*)
King dedede: GAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!
Teletubbies:(run off) (meanwhile....)
Kirby: NICE GOING COLORB! NOW WE HAVE AN INSANE AUTHOR RUNNING
ABOUT SPREADING CHAOS AROUND!!!
Colorb: so loud.so loud.
Me: (Beating Marx to death with a stick while riding a Bugzy) I'm not spreading chaos! (runs off and runs into a tree) THE PAIN!IT HURTS!
Kirby: O_o
wattchamacallit: Wait a minute. something's coming.
Me: (speaking like yoda) InDEED, coming something is, mmmmmmmMMMMMMmmmmm.
(suddenly, the teletubbies come over the hillside)
Kirby: SHREEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Me: DIE TELETUBBIES!!!!(leaps at the teletubbies)KIKIKIKIKIKIKIKIYAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!
Teletubbies: (throw bees at Me) bee bee! Bee bee!
Me: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! (runs away from the bees at the speed of light while throwing icicles at the bees)
bees: (die)
Wattchamacallit: We have to help him!
Kirby: why?
Wattchamacallit: because the author is making us! (starts zapping teletubbies)
Colorb: (draws an anvil above one of the teletubbie's heads) (anvil crashes down on teletubbie's head) MweHehEhEhehehehehehe!
squashed teletubby: the pain! It hurts!
Me: THAT'S MY LINE! (whacks teletubby with giant iron snowflake and starts whacking other teletubbies) SNOWFLAKE OF HELL! (a giant evil-grinning snowflake rises up from the ground and charges the teletubbies)
Snowflake of hell: That will be $7463278975037419023842. what? you don't have any money? DIE! (Rams the teletubbies)**
Kirby: (eats a teletubby and violently pukes up little telletubby bits)
Colorb: (draws a gigantic hammer, which he uses to pound a teletubby into the ground) 2 remaining telletubbies: (throw a truckload of very annoying things at us) take that take that! Take that take that! we are in pain.
Wattchamacallit spears a teletubby on his horns. we move in on the the remaining teletubby and kill it through very painful means. Just as it dies it throws the most satanic thing of all. it throws.TINGLE!
K,W,&C: MY EYES!
Me:(eyes glowing red) DIE SATAN! BEHOLD MY MOST POWERFUL ATTACK..CHAOTIC SNOWSTORM!!!!
Suddenly, Tingle is bombarded with giant snowflakes, huge ice cubes, icicles, snowballs, and very cold wind. when the snowstorm clears(which took half an hour), Tingle is frozen, cut in half, and has icicle stab wounds all over his body. he then shatters in an explosion of ice and blood.
Me: (evil grin)
K,W,&C: O_O
Me: I have been waiting SO LONG to do that! (chapter ends)
*That's the sound from Monty Python and The Holy Grail that plays when the knights who go ni tell King Arthur and his knights of the round table to do something.
** Get it? It looked like charge as in charge at people, but it was actually charge as in charge you money! C'mon, it's funny! LAUGH, dammit!
I don't think that this chapter was funny as I wanted it to be.
Disclaimer: I do not own Kirby, or teletubbies, or Yoda, or tingle (THANK GOD!). So there. But I do own colorb and wattchamacallit.
It was a beautiful day in dreamland. Kirby and king dedede were fighting, it was really really stormy, and all of king dedede's minions were out getting drunk off their asses. okay, so it wasn't so beautiful. any ways since I, the author, don't feel like writing a battle scene, I'll just say that king dedede gets his ass kicked.
King dedede:(runs away)
Kirby: finally, I beat him. time to go pig out! (Kirby runs off, only to run into two other creatures. the first one looked like Kirby, only he didn't have any arms or a mouth, and it was yellow and had 3 lightning bolt-shaped horns and had a wire with an electrical plug on the end for a tail. the second creature looked like an armless and legless Kirby also, but he had paint splotches covering his entire body, and had a pencil tail and a paintbrush and had 2 light blue paint splotches on the tips of his feet.)
first creature: hey, watch where you're going!
Kirby :who are you guys and where are you from?
first creature: I'm wattchamacallit.
second creature: and I'm colorb(as in color orb.)
both: and we're here because the author put us here!
Kirby: Author? wait a minute. you mean I'm in ANOTHER fic?!
colorb: yes.
Kirby: Is this author insane?
wattchamacallit: yes.
Kirby: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
wattchamacallit: Don't worry, the author is trapped behind the fourth wall, so he can't interact with this world physically.
Kirby: Can I see?
colorb: sure, come on. (so they went and they came upon a bubble-like wall with a very large snowball behind the wall)
Colorb: Here we are.
Kirby: Um..that wall looks very weak.
Colorb: Don't worry, the wall won't break unless you mention something about the author, like "the author is very stupid"(suddenly realizes what he did) OH.CRAP. (the wall ripples and shatters, causing the snowball to roll down the hill at the trio. they dodge the snowball and it stops.
K,W,&C: whew. (the snowball explodes, covering them in snow and revealing a creature that looks like ice dragon except it is very small, isn't as fat, doesn't have the jaggedy teeth things, and is blueish-green)
Kirby: YOU'RE the author?!!
Me: I am not JUST "the author"! I am (very loud echoey voice) CHIBI ICE DRAGON!!!(runs off)
Wattchamacallit: great, now this fic is going to get insane. (scene change to king dedede's castle)
King dedede: perfect. I can't defeat Kirby and neither can any monster.(gets into his chair and presses the button for the N.M.E screen to come up)
King dedede: N.M.E guy, I none of your monsters can beat Kirby. I want the most powerfulest monster you have. most.powerfulest...
N.M.E guy: I have a name you know. It's faggot.
King dedede:(trying to hold in laughter) that's ..very nice...
Faggot: there is a form you have to sign. (reading)the signer of this contract agrees to blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah...
24 hours later. blah blah blah blah-
king dedede: LISTEN, YOU LAWYER-LIKE PERSON!!!I WANT YOUR STRONGEST MONSTER RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!
Faggot :okay,okay! (sends monster) (big zappity lightning affects)(the zappity stuff clears revealing... THE TELETUBBIES!!!(DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENGGGG!!!!!!!!*)
King dedede: GAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!
Teletubbies:(run off) (meanwhile....)
Kirby: NICE GOING COLORB! NOW WE HAVE AN INSANE AUTHOR RUNNING
ABOUT SPREADING CHAOS AROUND!!!
Colorb: so loud.so loud.
Me: (Beating Marx to death with a stick while riding a Bugzy) I'm not spreading chaos! (runs off and runs into a tree) THE PAIN!IT HURTS!
Kirby: O_o
wattchamacallit: Wait a minute. something's coming.
Me: (speaking like yoda) InDEED, coming something is, mmmmmmmMMMMMMmmmmm.
(suddenly, the teletubbies come over the hillside)
Kirby: SHREEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Me: DIE TELETUBBIES!!!!(leaps at the teletubbies)KIKIKIKIKIKIKIKIYAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!
Teletubbies: (throw bees at Me) bee bee! Bee bee!
Me: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! (runs away from the bees at the speed of light while throwing icicles at the bees)
bees: (die)
Wattchamacallit: We have to help him!
Kirby: why?
Wattchamacallit: because the author is making us! (starts zapping teletubbies)
Colorb: (draws an anvil above one of the teletubbie's heads) (anvil crashes down on teletubbie's head) MweHehEhEhehehehehehe!
squashed teletubby: the pain! It hurts!
Me: THAT'S MY LINE! (whacks teletubby with giant iron snowflake and starts whacking other teletubbies) SNOWFLAKE OF HELL! (a giant evil-grinning snowflake rises up from the ground and charges the teletubbies)
Snowflake of hell: That will be $7463278975037419023842. what? you don't have any money? DIE! (Rams the teletubbies)**
Kirby: (eats a teletubby and violently pukes up little telletubby bits)
Colorb: (draws a gigantic hammer, which he uses to pound a teletubby into the ground) 2 remaining telletubbies: (throw a truckload of very annoying things at us) take that take that! Take that take that! we are in pain.
Wattchamacallit spears a teletubby on his horns. we move in on the the remaining teletubby and kill it through very painful means. Just as it dies it throws the most satanic thing of all. it throws.TINGLE!
K,W,&C: MY EYES!
Me:(eyes glowing red) DIE SATAN! BEHOLD MY MOST POWERFUL ATTACK..CHAOTIC SNOWSTORM!!!!
Suddenly, Tingle is bombarded with giant snowflakes, huge ice cubes, icicles, snowballs, and very cold wind. when the snowstorm clears(which took half an hour), Tingle is frozen, cut in half, and has icicle stab wounds all over his body. he then shatters in an explosion of ice and blood.
Me: (evil grin)
K,W,&C: O_O
Me: I have been waiting SO LONG to do that! (chapter ends)
*That's the sound from Monty Python and The Holy Grail that plays when the knights who go ni tell King Arthur and his knights of the round table to do something.
** Get it? It looked like charge as in charge at people, but it was actually charge as in charge you money! C'mon, it's funny! LAUGH, dammit!
I don't think that this chapter was funny as I wanted it to be.