Cloudy with a Chance of Rain
character death+angst+fluff... tah-dah!
The sky was grey and black and dark. No sun, no sun at all. What was the point of sun that day? He would never come back, to play and laugh and live. It was only fitting that the sun was gone. For he was the sun, his light was the source of beauty in life.
In her life.
She had stayed by his side for as long as she could, she stayed and watched and prayed and sobbed. She screamed and ranted and became mute. Then the whole cycle, the whole damned cycle, started up again.
His father wasn't there very often. He came in for a little while, then rushed off to his meetings. He had gone through all of this already. He knew what would happen. But was that an excuse for abandoning his own son! ...she didn't believe that. She could hardly bear the hurt she felt, when she looked upon his face, twisted in pain and fear and horror, mouth and lips (oh, those lips that moved and smiled and talked so sweetly) covered by an oxygen mask.
For she knew, she knew, that he was dying, that he was lucky to have even survived the little bit that he had. Rather, she was lucky. She was so selfish, so very selfish..
How she wanted, so much, for him to be alive. Just for her. She wanted them to sit together under a cherry tree, holding hands, looking into each others eyes. Just them, in happy isolation, together always and forever. She had planned it out so many times, playing the blessed scene over and over again in her mind. They would talk about their past, discuss their future, laugh and joke together as they do. Then he would look down and smile slightly. She, not quite understanding, would tilt her head, causing some strands of hair to fall into her eyes. He would look up at her with those wide, soft, golden eyes, and push back her hair. As she blushed properly, he would lean in to gently press his lips against hers, and she would kiss him back--
Selfish, selfish, selfish.
She would run out into the cloudy dark night when she couldn't take it anymore. The wind calmed her, somehow. For she could scream all her insecurity and fear and doubt out, argue and question and assume, and it would sweep it all away with the falling crumbling leaves. She would watch the cars zoom by, she would look away from the drunkards stumbling along as they supported their prostitutes, and then look up at the clouds that floated.
The moon was a light that she could almost bear, but it reminded her of the boy who was the source of her sorrow and her worries and her flee. And then the clouds came to make the night dark once more..
But now there were going to be no more days spent in anguish. No more quick dashes to the hospital cafeteria, too anxious to leave his side. No more sorrow etched into his face. No more arguments with her own, foolish, selfish self. For everything was over. The sun had set for the last time, swallowed up by the dark clouds.
He was dead, oh, so dead.
She had almost gone to the funeral with her parents. Her father, bless the cold-hearted soul, had merely stood by her as they lowered his coffin into the grave before leaving for work. Her mother had preferred to go shopping. Both sent their apologies and condolences to the last member of the Higuchi family. His father. The one who, apparently, lost all ability of coherent speech when informed of his son's death.
Shino, poor darling, had burst into tears. She couldn't bear to look at her, though. She wanted to comfort her and hug her and let her own tears mingle with those of his blood's...
But she couldn't. It hurt her to see those eyes. So similar, yet so extremely different. Shia was there, though. She comforted the younger girl. As a mother would.
But she still couldn't look.
So she left to sit in the grass somewhere and look up into the clouds, the clouds that set the mood for the rest of his life. For the rest of her life.
Suddenly she realized that this was truly, truly over. Never again would they make a mad dash in an attempt to not be late for class. Never again could she try to bake him a apple pie. Never again would the three of them, the three of them, the three--
And then she realized that he, too, had been there.
She remembered her mother giving her messages when she came home at night, from the hospital. Telling her that that Takashi called again. Why didn't she ever bother calling him? He sounded like a nice boy. A living one, in any case. Was she even listening? Then she realized that she knew, she KNEW, just who was holding her now, as the tears fell freely.
"He's gone, Ten-chan.." she whimpered, leaning into his embrace. "He's.. really gone.."
"Dammit, Koboshi, don't you think I know that!" he retorted, angrily, holding her even closer to him.
They huddled together under the ever darkening clouds.
"I never.. I never thought about it this way before," Koboshi whispered faintly. "I mean.."
"You knew that he was going to die. But it never registered in your mind. Because life without him doesn't even exist." Takashi stated, his own tears joining hers in falling to the ground. She had never made it to her spot under the cherry tree.
She laughed bitterly. "It's fitting that the forecast for today is cloudy with a chance of rain."
"What do you mean?" he murmured, stroking her hair. He had stopped her as she was crossing a bridge, a bridge to her cherry tree.
"He was like the sun," she murmured. "He was warm and beautiful and kind. He shone. You know what I mean, Ten-chan.. only you do."
"I know. And he's gone," he added softly.
'Our sun is gone.'
"But the rain?"
She gestured vaguely to their own tear stained faces, laughing, haltingly. "And here's our rain!" With that, she sank down to the ground and began sobbing even more. "He's dead.." she muttered. "He's dead."
Takashi flinched at the harsh word, then bowed his head. He let her cry and rant, knowing there was nothing else to be done. He, too, was overwhelmed by sorrow, but knew that hers was a grief even stronger, if possible.
She somehow realized that. 'But...'
The sun.. it's gone.. death came as a black wave to swallow the shining light in billowing clouds... " Her tears still flowed.
His eyes widened at the nonsense. "Koboshi?.."
"He's forever nevermore.." she giggled, her voice higher than usual, her eyes dark.
"Koboshi!" he shook her, a strange note in his voice.
"Don't you know there's no life without the sun? It's pure nothingness. So, it's only fitting that I, too, would be nothingness..." her unseeing eyes widened as she taunted him. She stumbled over to the railing of the bridge, not hearing Takashi's pleading cries.
He has no life. She has no life. He shouldn't, either. It's only fair. When the sun dies, there is an explosion and the stars go out and the moon becomes dark and the earth freezes. There is a queer beauty in ice. But it is nothing compared to that of the sun, of the life from the sun.
Koboshi sat on the railing, looking down at the cars below. She smiled and looked over at her friend, the only living one, the one she'd gladly pull with her. "Want to come?"
"Koboshi!" Takashi yelled. "What the hell do you think you're doing!" He ran and pulled her off the railing, and crushed her body against his.
She looked up at him as a tear made its way down her cheek. "You can't live on a frozen earth."
He stared at her. And then he did the only thing he could think of doing, to make her stop talking. To try to help her. He leaned in and kissed her.
It wasn't a kiss under a cherry tree. It wasn't from him. But suddenly she felt that maybe, just maybe, the stars and moon weren't quite faded yet. So, she kissed back.
Finally he broke off and looked at her. She could see an altogether too familiar expression in his eyes, one she had imagined, oh, so many times. But it was soon replaced by deep concern.
"Ten-chan," she whispered, laying her head on his shoulder.
'Thank you.'
"Are you okay now?" She nodded. "Good." He smiled a tired smile at her.
She couldn't help but try to grin back, however weakly.
"We'll get through this together, right, Koboshi-chan?" he asked anxiously.
She nodded again.
He kissed the top of her head and began rocking her gently as she shut her eyes tightly.
"Koboshi-chan.." he began, quietly, still hugging her tightly. "Why didn't you ever return my calls?"
She stiffened slightly in his arms. "I'm sorry, Ten-chan. I just.. just couldn't," she said, her voice wobbling precariously.
"I understand." And that was all that needed to be said.
So, the rain began to pour.
...She had never realized clouds could be this beautiful before.
: daisuki. owari. :
For Like An Angel's fanfiction contest, my first completed Pita-Ten fic. Is veryyy clear by the end that it's Ten-chan x Koboshi.. ahh, poor Koutaro-kun, I still can't believe I killed him. :sniff:
As usual, nothing is owned. Except the obvious, of course.
05/24/05: Formatting fixed :)