I haven't thought about her for several days now. It's very strange -- on one account, I'm horribly relieved. For six years I've been afraid that I wouldn't live another day without needing her. Here I am, after so many days of aching and wishing, bereft of her. However, I'm also beginning to feel... empty. I think Daphne fills a void in my life. Something left by the absence of my mother, perhaps, or maybe a lack of warmth from Maris. But now that I've completely given up on my goddess, everything I think just echoes. Every private consideration rings hollow, because that hope I've carried along with me has died.
Well... There's not much that can be done now, is there?
She's been going on and on about the wedding plans every time I've seen her. We've even had small conversations on the nature of the decorations. She told me, amazingly enough, that I was much easier to talk to than Frasier. She said that I understood her, and was sensitive to her wishes. On any account, it's going to be a gorgeous, yet quaint, ceremony at a hotel somewhere. She didn't quite know yet, but she was very excited.
I'm excited for her.
The look in her eyes when she spoke of him made me wonder if anyone ever loved me as much as Daphne loves Donny. Has anyone ever mentioned me with the same tone of affection, eyes sparkling with memories? Has there ever been any man who wanted to be just a little bit of me, the way I wish I had the same charm as my love's robust fiancee?
Somehow I doubt it. Maris failed to bring me up in civilized conversation, unless she thought I might be able to get us into a higher category of society. The platinum membership of a day-spa, box seats at the opera, forty percent off a set of botox injections...
I suppose it doesn't really matter. After all, eventually I'll find someone. Someone who loves me, and wants children, and has excellent taste in all aspects... She's got to be out there, somewhere