Chapter 9: Proposal
Hank watched as Amanda rolled over in bed to lie on her stomach. Even though there were no wings there anymore, sometimes in her sleep she'd lie like there was. He sighed as her new position revealed the heavy white bandages taped to her shoulders. Hank kept the area where her wings used to be well-medicated so she wouldn't feel the pain, but nerves exposed the way hers had been didn't numb easily, and she twitched slightly.
He rolled over on his back in bed, tears in his eyes. No one should have to suffer so much. It wasn;'t fair. Why Amanda? She had been living a normal life (not happy, but normal) until she had met Jubilee, and by extension, the rest of the X-Men. Then Magneto had mutated her with her own virus, causing her incredible pain. And now she was suffering again, this time from having her wings cut out.
When they had first brought her home, Hank had been tossing around possible designs for a set of prosthetic wings, because their loss seemed to bother her so much. A close inspection of her back, done after he had put her to sleep to avoid hurting her, had dashed those hopes. Bruce had cut out not only the wing, but the muscles and tendons that had been attached to the wings too. Even if he made prosthetic wings for her, she wouldn't be able to use them.
Then an infection set into the wounds, and Hank had sat by her side in the med lab for a week as her fever soared and she became delirious. And he'd been shocked. She wasn't concerned for the loss of the wings for herself; she was worried that he wouldn't love her anymore because she didn't have her wings. When she woke up, he had tried his hardest to convince her that he still loved her, but he still got the feeling that somehow the message hadn't gotten through.
While she was unconscious with fever he had taken samples of her skin and was growing grafts to implant over the open wounds on her back. Until they were ready, the bandages would have to suffice.
He looked across the bed to where Amanda was still twitching. Not pain, then, thank goodness, but a nightmare. Amanda didn't move around much in her sleep; she tended to just lie in one place, occasionally rolling over. As a result, he'd initially had a hard time figuring out when she had nightmares, because she didn't cry out in her sleep like Logan said Jubilee did occasionally. Now, however, having slept beside Amanda for the better part of a year, he knew when she was having bad dreams, just as she knew when he was having bad dreams.
He stared at the ceiling. It seemed to be a night for it. He'd been awakened from a nightmare of Amanda hanging there screaming as the scalpel dug into her back. It still evoked as much horror in him as it had when he had woken from what he'd thought then was a nightmare back in jail. He had, since then, become aware of an extra bond between them; he knew when she was in pain, he knew when she was sad, he knew when she was happy. It mystified him; he couldn't figure it out, and neither could Jean and the Professor. They had finally decided that it was a deeper, soul-bond, and left it at that. It disturbed Hank sometimes; it was so much worse to see what had been done to Amanda than to have the same thing done to him, but at the same time, he could empathize, knowing what she had gone through.
He looked at her, saw the silvery tears on her face, and his heart contracted. He hated seeing her cry; and she had been doing far too much of it lately. He reached over to her, shook her shoulder gently. "Amanda? Amanda, wake up. It's all right, beloved; you're safe. You're here with me; it's over. I'll never let anyone hurt you again." Her silver eyes opened, still misted with tears and the remnants of her dream, and he sat up in bed, taking her shoulders and pulling her upright. She sat on the bed between his parted thighs, her back against his broad chest, and he wrapped his arms around her as she shook with silent sobs. "Sshh," he said quietly, resting his head on the curve of her shoulder in an intimate caress that He knew Amanda loved. She had been married before; but there hadn't been a lot of intimacy with her husband; and there had been even less with Bruce. Amanda loved being hugged, touched, and caressed by him; and he was only too happy to oblige her. Her tears fell in a hard silvery rain in front of her on the bed, and he held out a tissue in front of her to catch them. She finally stopped crying, and they lay back down.
She turned to him, kissed him tentatively, almost hesitantly. He wasn't really feeling like it, but he knew if he refused she would take that as a rejection. And he didn't mind, really.
She went back to sleep after they were done, but he couldn't. He slid quietly out of bed, slipped his legs into his pants, and padded quietly from his room down toward the kitchen for a snack. He stopped, slightly surprised, when he saw that a few of the mansion's other residents obviously couldn't sleep either.
Betsy, Warren, Jubilee, and Xavier sat around the kitchen table, tucking into a mountain of sandwiches and a pot of soup. Jubilee saw him standing in the door and waved him in. "Come on in, Hank. Hey, how's Amanda?"
Hank sat down in one of the chairs and eyed the sandwiches. Jubilee pushed the plate over to him, and he selected one. "As well as can be expected," he said. "She is still coping with the physical aftermath of having her wings removed--"
"I know how she's doing physically," Jubilee said. "How is she doing emotionally? Is she still worried that you don't love her?"
Hank sighed. "I have never been good with feelings, Jubilee," he said, putting his sandwich down. "Amanda is extremely insecure. It is not surprising, considering how upsetting her past relationships have been, but she and I have been 'together' as you put it, for so long I would have thought she would not worry about the state of my feelings for her."
"How do you feel?" Betsy was watching Hank intently.
"I love her," Hank said simply. "She is everything I have ever admired in a woman; everything I have ever looked for or wanted. It hurt to realize just how close I came to losing her; Bruce could have easily killed her with a little slip of a knife when he was amputating her wings, and later, when she was so ill with the infection…" his voice trailed off and he took a swallow of his hot tea, ignoring the way it scalded his mouth. Maybe it would take away the bitter taste of the fear he had felt as he kept vigil at her side, praying for her to make it through each day.
Jubilee said suddenly, 'So why don't you show her what she means to you?"
Hank looked at her, puzzled. "I do," he said. "Every day. I am there for her whenever she needs me; she should know how much I love her."
Betsy gave a small smile. "Hank, how long have you two been together?"
That stumped him. How long had it been? He tried to think.
"A year two weeks ago," Betsy answered her own question. "A year and two weeks. Hank, I know guys don't think about this; but did you do anything to celebrate that little milestone with her?"
Hank shook his head. "No," he said. "What should I have done?"
Betsy smiled. "Dinner might be a nice start," she said gently. "And maybe one of these." He scrabbled around in the pile of papers and stuff in the middle of the table until she came out with one of the women's magazines that Hank had seen Amanda with a few times. Betsy opened the magazine, leafed through it, and then shoved the open magazine across the table at him.
Hank looked at the open page. It was an ad for a nice jewelers in New York; and in the middle of the page was a lovely diamond ring. A round princess-cut diamond, he noted, set in eighteen carat gold. The caption read, 'A special ring…for the special woman in your life.' He looked up at Betsy, startled.
Betsy nodded, smiling, and he noticed that Charles and Warren were smiling too. "Amanda really likes that ring. I was actually looking a it a while ago, and I showed it to her, and she looked at it. Hank, she said, 'If you can get someone to buy that for you you'd be the luckiest girl on earth.' And later she showed me her jewelry. The engagement ring her first husband gave her was gold-plated sterling silver; and Bruce didn't even bother getting her a diamond; he bought her a silver and onyx ring. She hates it. She never wore it." Betsy took a spoonful of her soup. "Warren did buy it for me, completely spontaneously, a week later. I still don't know how he knew I'd like it; but here it is." Hank looked at it as Betsy showed it to him, winking on her finger. It was prettier than it looked in the picture. The stone wasn't big enough to get in Amanda's way when she was mixing chemicals in the lab; and it was pretty. Hank knew she'd like it.
"But she's been through so much," he said. "I don't want to shock her again. And what if…" this was a big worry for him, "What if she says no?"
Jubilee looked at Betsy. Betsy looked at Warren. Warren looked at Charles. And all three started to laugh. "You don't honestly think she's going to say no, do you?" Jubilee wiped her eyes. "Oh, my. Is that what's worrying you?"
Mystified, Hank nodded. Jubilee went off into another fit of laughter. Betsy asked him,, "Hank, whatever makes you think Amanda's going to say no?"
"She's been through so much. I know she says she loves me…but well, look at me. She's so pretty, so delicate and gentle, and I'm--" He didn't get any further. Jubilee stood up and smacked the back of his head, none too gently, either.
"Hank! My God, look at the two of you! So much alike. She's worried to death that you think she's ugly; and you think she thinks you're ugly! Let me clue you in, Hank. She doesn't care what you look like. You don't care what she looks like. So what's the hold up?" Jubilee crossed her arms and sat back. "Will you two just get over it already!"
Hank looked again at the ring. Charles said quietly, "Hank, if you love her as much as she loves you, then don't let anything stop you. In her current emotional state, she might actually welcome this symbol of your love for her. If you love her, go ahead. Get it for her."
* * *
Hank wandered up and down the jewelry cases. The ring was prominently displayed in the front window; but he also wanted to get her something else. Nothing to do with any promises or commitments, just something she would like for her pleasure only. Warren and Betsy walked along beside him, pointing things out, but Hank didn't need their help, after all. He saw a lovely necklace and bracelet set in a far case against the wall; gold swirled elegantly and fluidly around four tear-shaped diamonds. It looked like the tie-clip she had given him; and he knew it would be perfect. When the salesman came over, he pointed out the necklace and bracelet, and then the ring. As the man was ringing up and bagging the purchases, Betsy pointed out a pair of earrings; four tear-shaped diamonds clustered together. Hank looked rather wistfully at them. They were perfect; but he had just maxed out his cards getting the necklace and bracelet for her; he couldn't afford the earrings too.
They grabbed a quick bite to eat at the restaurant at the mall, and then were almost out to the car when Warren groaned theatrically and grabbed his stomach. "I have to use the men's room," he said, doubled over so Hank couldn't see his face and winking at Betsy. "You two go on. I'll be back soon."
"I did not think he should have had that spicy fried chicken," Hank said mildly, watching Warren run off back toward the mall. He and Betsy got into the car, and it wasn't long before Warren joined them. Hank was concentrating on the road, so he didn't see Warren slipping the earrings into his bag.
Once home, Hank took the bag up to his room. He frowned when he saw three boxes in there instead of two. Upon opening the extra box, he was stunned to discover the earrings nestled in the black velvet. Tucked inside was a piece of paper, with Warren's handwriting on it. Hey Hank. You owe me one. Warren.
Hank closed the box with a smile. Yes, he owed Warren one.
* * *
Amanda sighed. "Jubilee, I really don't feel like eating downstairs with everyone tonight," she sighed as she slipped into a loose-fitting blouse and skirt. "And why are you making me wear a skirt? Is there something going on I don't know about?"
Jubilee grinned as she fussed with Amanda's hair. "Oh yes. Believe me, you're not going to want to miss this. Two of the X-men are getting engaged tonight; it's going to be an engagement party. So you have to look good."
"Really?" Amanda tried to guess who might be getting engaged. Maybe Betsy and Warren. She'd seen Betsy with a new ring, the same one she had admired in a magazine a while ago. Maybe Warren had bought it for her privately, and was planning to publicly announce their engagement at dinner. She sighed and sat down. If Jubilee was so determined there wasn't a whole lot she could do to deflate her enthusiasm.
She sat at her usual seat beside Hank that evening. He insisted on getting up and getting her plate from the kitchen, even though she told him she could get it herself. She was so busy watching Betsy and Warren that it was a complete surprise when she lifted the water glass Hank gave her and something hard fell into her mouth.
She spit it out into her hand, spluttering in surprise, and stared stupefied at the diamond in her hand. She stared at it for a moment, then raised her eyes and looked at Hank, sitting beside her and looking at her hopefully. The ring clattered to her plate as she threw her arms around him, joy filling her heart. She loved him, so much, and now she knew he loved her, no matter what she looked like. "I love you," she whispered in his ear. "And yes, I'll marry you."
Hank took her face in his hands, his large blue hands framing her delicate pale face, and looked at her radiant expression. Not trusting himself to speak, he kissed her.
Applause broke out all around the table. Amanda grinned crookedly at Jubilee when they finally broke off the kiss, and slid the ring on her finger. Under cover of the ensuing applause, she said, 'I'm going to get you for that."
Jubilee grinned unrepentantly and hugged Amanda. "Don't tally it all up yet,' she said cheerfully. "We girls are planning your wedding."
"Oh, no!" Amanda looked horrified first at Jubilee, then at Betsy. They laughed, and set back to eat.
She was sitting on Hank's bed after dinner, examining the ring. Hank came in, saw her looking, and picked up the bag from his dresser. "Do you like it?' he asked her, sitting down.
"I love it," she said quietly.
Hank kissed her cheek. "Good. Here," he said, handing her the bag. She saw the name on the outside of the bag instantly, and looked at him wide-eyed.
"Well, we missed your birthday," he shrugged by way of apology. "You were in the medlabs. I thought you might like a late birthday present."
Amanda opened it all, speechless, and grinned. "Wait here," she said, and disappeared into her room. Five minutes later she appeared at the adjoining door, wearing a sheer black nightgown that left nothing to the imagination, and the diamond jewelry he had just given her. Her voice was huskily seductive. "Is this thanks enough?"
Hank took Amanda in his arms and carried her to the bed. "It is indeed," he said into her ear.