Title: Born to Be My Baby
Author: ¤Sha¤GojyoxCho¤Hakkai¤
Date: Began March, 2003
Chapter: 9/?
Rating: Uh - oh! It kinda depends on what you classify as R and PG - 13. Most people would say that this is R! *evil laugh* Don't worry. No Lemon.
Category: Romance, Angst, Language, Blood and the like
Main Pairing: Gojyo x Hakkai
Disclaimer: I do not own Gensomaden Saiyuki. All characters, names, etc. are copyrighted to Minekura Kazuya.
Warning: Shounen ai/yaoi (for you people who don't speak Japanese, that's male/male relationships.... isn't it cute? *smiles*)
*Still.... in.... flashback....!*
Please read and review, seeing as Guardian of Jupiter has been the only one being very loyal and doing so. *smiles*
Note: Chapters will be put up a little slower near May 20th, and until May 24th because there will be final exams. (I want good teachers for eighth grade ple - e - e - ase! *sobs*)
Alright! Chapter Nine! *glomps Vash* Love and Peace!!
_____________
Part Ninth (9/?)
They both smiled and pressed their lips to each other's.
But this time was different for some reason. 'Each kiss will be different,' is what they told themselves. There was a strange stinging emotion hanging in the air and it made them feel like they had all the time in the world to do whatever they wanted. This is why they kept their eyes open then: both of them. They had both thought the same at the exact same time. Great minds think alike, right? [1] It was right then that Gojyo realized what passion burned in Hakkai's eyes when they had kissed those many times before. It was something like a burning emerald wild fire that blazed within those eyes. But one was dim. One was not there at all. It was the eye that he had torn out. However, Gojyo knew that if Hakkai could have it, he would have wanted that amazing fire to blaze in both of his eyes. Gojyo knew that there was a fire behind Hakkai's other eye....
Hakkai experienced the same as his vision remained locked strictly to Gojyo's gorgeous eyes. He felt like telling Gojyo what he saw, but fear of breaking the kiss immediately shattered the notion. Reluctantly, Gojyo separated their lips, keeping his eyes locked with the other man's.
"G - Gojyo," Hakkai murmured. Gojyo could see (and feel) that the sleeping bag in which they both were in was far too hot for both of them that night. Factoring in, with the warmth of the covers, the musky, rainy air and each other's body heat, the red - haired man heaved a sigh that soothed his lungs and throat and asked,
"Is this too hot?"
"What?" Hakkai almost whispered.
"It's too hot for me, baby." Then he laughed, "So are you. Too hot for me."
Hakkai brought his head under Gojyo's chin and snuggled himself inward. "Nothing's too hot for you."
Gojyo reached back and pulled on the zipper of the sleeping bag, letting himself out reluctantly, but taking Hakkai with him, pulling him up gently by his shoulders until they were both in a sitting position.
"We were just complaining about how cold it was a few minutes ago," Gojyo chuckled, "and now, we both think it's too hot?"
Hakkai laughed but said nothing afterward and Gojyo stood up and invited Hakkai.
"Why are we here of all places?" Hakkai asked as Gojyo led him to underneath the only tree for miles. 'And why didn't I see this tree here before?'
"Can we just stay here for a while, Hakkai?" Gojyo inquired. It was then that Hakkai really wished that he had stayed back in the tent, in the warm, dry sleeping bag, instead of being out in the rain, dripping wet and freezing. He shivered and sneezed. "Please?" But when Gojyo said that, Hakkai agreed and sat down next to him, underneath the tree.
"Gojyo?"
"Yes?"
"Say it again. Will you?"
"Hakkai?"
Hakkai put his arms around one of Gojyo's and leant against his shoulder, closing his eyes.
"Are you alright with this?" Gojyo querried as one of his hands found its way to Hakkai's cheek, lifting his head to make eye contact with him. "Even if it's raining like this?"
Hakkai blinked as a raindrop fell from his hair and into one of his eyes but none of his other facial features changed and he leant into Gojyo's touch as he always did and answered truthfully, "Yes."
"Damn it," Gojyo cursed quite seriously.
"What?"
"Do you know how much I want you?"
That statement almost frightened Hakkai then and his face conveyed that. Gojyo apologized, silently and prepared to pull himself into a standing position but Hakkai protested then and Gojyo looked down to him. "Tell me," Hakkai whispered. "Tell me how much you want me, then, Gojyo."
Gojyo felt the warmth of Hakkai's hand in his own and felt the dripping raindrops from the leaves of the branches above but the strongest feeling inside of him was the feeling of adoration for the other man he was with. The brunette pulled Gojyo down, back to sitting beside him, back so he could lean against his shoulder and it was then that Gojyo's words shot their way through Hakkai's thoughts when the red - haired half - breed said, "Why don't I show you?"
Hakkai felt Gojyo's hands on his shoulders and begin to massage his neck tenderly. And with a kiss, Hakkai said no more. He was lying on the ground, his head thrown back and Gojyo over him, straddling his thighs and leaning over to kiss him. The brunette's hands were fastened to the back of Gojyo's head. Hakkai's eyes were half - lidded, his monocle lying on the other side of the tree trunk to prevent it being scratched or broken and his lips were parted and swollen from the multiple kisses that had been shared between he and Gojyo.
Gojyo was feeling the same as he leant down for another passionate kiss that involved his tongue in Hakkai's mouth and Hakkai's tongue nearly down his throat and Gojyo groaned at this from deep down within the deepest bowels of himself. When they parted, between their lips was a trail of saliva and Gojyo reached to wipe off the trail from Hakkai's lips.
And Gojyo felt like crying then, just from the beautiful sight that was layed out in front of him; we wanted to cry because he loved Hakkai so much. Right then, he realized that this was really the first time that he had ever taken things in a relationship so slowly. This was the first time that lust did not completely consume him and lock him into its cage, but it was when Gojyo really thought about more than someone's body. A key out of the cage. The look of Hakkai laying so trusting in front of him, his body was fully relaxed: he trusted him. He trusted Gojyo.
Hakkai put his arms behind him and pushed himself up with a small amount of effort until he was leaning back on one of his elbows and with his other hand, well, it found its way to the scarred cheek that belonged to the half - breed over him. "You know, there have only been two people I can trust in this world," Hakkai remarked. Gojyo froze. "And you are one of them."
Gojyo's eyes filled with glimmering tears that ran down his cheeks with no shame as he went forward and wrapped his arms around Hakkai's shoulders, burrying his face in Hakkai's shoulder and whispering a muffled endearment, "I love you, baby."
"Gojyo...," Hakkai smiled and hugged the other man close. "I love you, too."
"Forever," Gojyo continued, his voice almost in a monotone, so there was really no way to tell if it was his promise or an inquizition.
At the exact same time, they pulled away only enough to see each other's faces and vowed, "I'll love you forever."
Hakkai's hand slapped over his mouth and he turned his head away from Gojyo, almost embarassed, scared.
"Hakkai?"
His breathing hurried. His chest hurt. "That," Hakkai tried but his voice really could not come to him; but he tried, "That is... exactly what... Kanan and I used to say." A single tear rolled down his cheek. "We always did. Right when we woke up and right when we would sleep, even... see each other every moment, we would say it... at the same time... 'I'll love you forever.'"
"Hakkai!" Gojyo nearly yelled. "Don't say things like that! You still love her! It was not your fault!"
"We've been through this before, Gojyo."
"We've been through the 'Replacement' misunderstanding, too." Gojyo stated solemnly.
Hakkai's eyes were filled with fear. "Damn me...," he murmured, most likely to himself. "God... damn me!"
"Hakkai?"
Suddenly, a smile broke from Hakkai's lips and his honey - sweet laughter soothed his lover over him and the brunette said, through his tears, "God damn me because I was in love with my sister...," it was then that he took Gojyo's hand in his own and placed it over his chest, in a place where he could feel his racing heartbeat, "and now I'm homosexual."
It was not long until they were sharing more passionate kisses and craving each other's lips more than anything else. And it was right then that Gojyo's words broke through Hakkai's thoughts and he inquired, forcing the question through his panting lips, "Hakkai... Do you also wish the celebrate the... solution to the misunderstanding... that we've found?"
"What?"
"That little 'fight' that we've had is over, right? Why don't we kick it on its way then?" Gojyo winked.
Hakkai said nothing but instead, pulled Gojyo down for another loving kiss, pushing Gojyo's hand onto his chest and saying, "Gojyo, feel my heart."
"It's beating so fast!"
"It's because I'm happy. I'm anxious," he paused, "and a little scared, too."
Gojyo knew that both he and Hakkai disagreed to go "all the way" then and there. But, still, Hakkai had the right to be a little frightened, which meant that Gojyo had the right to comfort him and he leant over and placed his lips next to one of Hakkai's ears and whispered, "You do not have to be scared, love. I'll never hurt you." After those words, Gojyo delved his tongue sensually deep into Hakkai's ear, the brunette giving a cry of something between shock and delight and put his hands to Gojyo's back, gripping Gojyo's vest and letting a gasp escape his lips here and there.
"G - Gojyo...," Hakkai cried breathlessly as he felt his lover's lips move to the spot right behind his ear, the sensetive spot, and Hakkai felt his knees go weak, even though he was not standing. Gojyo's hands worked nervously and shakingly at the small red buttons and strings that kept Hakkai's shirt from falling open.
"Goj- -!" But he was cut off by a kiss and Gojyo reminded him,
"Remember, I won't hurt you. I'd rather die than hurt you, Hakkai."
Hakkai let his eyes slip shut as Gojyo worked impatiently at the buttons until all four of them were undone. He looked to Hakkai and requested, "Put your hands over your head? I want the ultimate image of you, baby."
The green - eyed man gave a genuine smile before lifting his arms over his head; this action caused a small amount of flesh to be exposed from his chest and it took all that Gojyo could to keep from moaning from the wonderful sight. He leant over to kiss the older man and while that was happening, he was able to undo the purple sash that ran from shoulder to waist diagonally across the other man's chest and pull back his shirt somewhat, but not before recieving a sudden, and what sounded like, frightened gasp.
Gojyo pulled back slightly, enough to gaze into Hakkai's face, enough to make sure that there was no negative emotion show there. Hakkai's eyes were glazed with tears but he was able to blink them back and give a comforting smile as Gojyo leant down and pressed his lips to Hakkai's flawness neck. The brunette groaned and threw his head back as he felt Gojyo nip and suck at his neck.
There was another kiss laid by Gojyo to Hakkai's lips and when they parted reluctantly, Gojyo found Hakkai's eyes half - lidded and his lips parted in heavier breathing. His arms were still over his head and Gojyo found a very surprising detail that suddenly Hakkai noticed as well as they both blushed red so terribly that it did not seem to be a colour any longer. Because Gojyo found himself straddling Hakkai's thighs, the brunette could feel the growing heat between the half - breed's legs.
He suddenly noticed that their shoes were gone. Gojyo was pushing the cloth of Hakkai's shirt off of his shoulders slowly, pressing his lips to the pale skin and kissing every bit that was revealed to him.
Gojyo's lips travelled past Hakkai's collarbone and this was where the former teacher found himself uncomfotable as his body tensed and Gojyo's kisses travelled over finely shaped chest muscles. The red - haired man noticed and paused, looking up from the brunette's chest and locking their eyes like so many times before. "Hakkai," Gojyo whispered. "Baby, if you tell me to stop, I will. You know I will."
But these words did not seem to get through to him, as his state of nervousness had not settled one bit. Gojyo pushed himself upwards and laid a hearfelt, passionate, loving kiss to Hakkai's lips, transferring the message that he did not seem to understand.
'You tell me to stop and I will.'
'You promise?'
'Baby, of course I do.'
Hakkai bit his lip until it almost bled but Gojyo stopped him by brushing his lips against Hakkai's in the most feather soft kiss he had ever felt and Hakkai's thoughts wandered to nothing outside of the red - haired man atop him. He never thought that he would feel for his best friend this way but feelings change over time. This thought brought tears to the brunette's eyes, which ran freely down his cheeks.
The rain pounded more insanely now, the dropplets so huge that someone would think them to be hail if they heard them pounding against a surface... the tent! Sanzo and Goku were still in the tent! What if they woke up and found Gojyo and Hakkai there in the midst of their celebration!? 'Oh, to Hell with what they think,' Hakkai pondered. 'Their opinion won't change the fact that I love him. I love Sha Gojyo.'
More tears came. Hakkai thought them to be tears of joy, happiness, for he did not know that he could be so madly in love as this. And as the rain continued to pound, the branches of the single tree they were under fitering them out, the couple still remained drenched, not only in water but in their love for each other. Gojyo pushed himself up somewhat and pressed his lips to Hakkai's cheeks where the tears were rolling down his face, his long scarlet tresses falling over his shoulders and tickling Hakkai's neck.
Gojyo kisses every one of Hakkai's tears away.
Before they knew it, Gojyo found that his lips resumed their eager exploration of the slightly smaller man beneath him and after they had passed his collarbone, his hand found its way up to the end of Hakkai's shirt and he opened it fully, revealing Hakkai's chest entirely.
Gojyo's eyes travelled past Hakkai's flawness neck to gaze upon beautiful chest muscles and perfect abodominals that were disrupted in their flow by a hideous gash that ran across Hakkai's abdomen. The brunette turned his glance elsewhere when he saw that Gojyo's eyes had fallen upon the scar. But when his eyes returned to the red - haired man's, he saw that Gojyo was looking him up and down once again, pausing at the pair of nipples that, Hakkai guessed, were the reason he opened his shirt in the first place.
Gojyo gazed down to his lover: his shirt was wide open, slipping off of his shoulders, his arms over his head. Gojyo groaned. It was the most magnificent sight he had ever seen and he kissed Hakkai once more, for all the love he possessed could not be expressed through kisses, no matter how many, but Gojyo wanted to get as close as he could. He wanted to stay with Hakkai like this forever and just stare at him forever. He wanted to kiss him forever and he wanted to touch him forever.
Hakkai gasped deeply into the kiss as he felt Gojyo's hands slide from where the hem of his pants were, over his abdominal muscles, and stopping where Hakkai's nipples were. The feather - soft touch of Gojyo's fingertips sliding up his body drove Hakkai almost wild and he would not be surprised right then and there if Gojyo asked if he could make sweet, passionate love him him right there. If it was with Gojyo, he would. If it was with the man that he loved, he would. He would do anything for Gojyo.
But he was not ready for that yet.
Hakkai broke the kiss suddenly when he felt Gojyo's fingers begin to tease at his nipples and he groaned, threw his head back, letting Gojyo know that he loved what was being given to him.
The brunette's chest was heaving now. His eyes were shut and his mouth open. Gojyo leant over and began to kiss Hakkai's neck once more, savoring every single bit of Hakkai's flesh.
Not only was Gojyo's arousal getting unbearably tight within the confides of his pants, but both he and his lover were soaking wet, the moonlight giving emphasis to every detail on their bodies. Gojyo felt Hakkai's flesh, running one hand down his front until he reached the hem of Hakkai's pants. Hakkai moaned once more and Gojyo could not help himself as he did too. God, he loved the sound of Hakkai in pleasure. He had no idea that the sounds of Hakkai's passion would get him so hard!
The red - haired man continued to fondle with Hakkai's chest, extracting eager moans from his love beneath him. Gojyo slowed the ministrations and kissed Hakkai's shoulder as he ran his fingertips over Hakkai's nipples time and time again. The former teacher suddenly did not care what Gojyo said and he rose his arms up and wrapped them around Gojyo's neck, pulling closer.
The hot wind blew in a humid smell of rain and dust. Hakkai gasped. The rain became heavier and ran its way through the branches of the tree overhead and Gojyo felt it rain down upon them.
Gojyo had a change of plans in mind. Not as different as the position they were in at the time, but the red - haired man found it to be a wonderful intention. He rose up from where he was, removing his fingers from Hakkai's nipples and placing the healer against the treetrunk so that they were facing each other. Hakkai's face was plastered with confusion but he understood what Gojyo planned to do with him once the former general resumed his position of straddling Hakkai's thighs.
Hakkai smiled in the darkness of the night and the humid air of the rain as he felt Gojyo's kisses on his neck once more and Gojyo's hands gently fondling and twisting his nipples. "Mm, Gojyo," Hakkai groaned.
"Oh, Hakkai, do you love it?" Gojyo asked, his voice muffled because he was nuzzling the brunette's neck affectionately.
"Oh, Gojyo!" Hakkai nearly screamed when Gojyo rubbed Hakkai's nipples between his thumb and forefinger. "I love it! Oh, I love it!" He paused to catch his breath and he murmured, "I love you!" And his hands began to work at Gojyo's vest, tugging it off as best he could. Gojyo paused and gave Hakkai a look like, 'What is it, baby?' but Hakkai just shook his head and explained, "Gojyo, I want to see you, too... please?"
"Of course, baby."
Gojyo reluctantly let Hakkai's nipples go from his fingers and leant back somewhat and let Hakkai remove his vest, placing it neatly a few feet away from them. Gojyo's white sleeveless shirt was gone and Hakkai immediately wrapped his arms around Gojyo's shoulders, pulling him closer to kiss him.
During the kiss, Gojyo felt Hakkai's hands slide down his chest. The red - haired man was surprised and his eyes widened when he felt the brunette's fingers run over his nipples but he did not break the kiss.
Gojyo could not take it anymore and he broke the kiss and left the green - eyed man thunderstruck. "G - Gojyo?" The red - haired man quickly seized Hakkai's wrists gently and pulled them over both of their heads, pinning them to the tree trunk.
"Remember," Gojyo's voice was solemn as he spoke, yet at the same time, sweet, loving, and sexy, "that if you tell me to stop, I will." He said this partly in fear and partly in protection. He wanted to remind Hakkai that if he did anythig that made him uncomfortable, he should tell him, but he also said that so that Hakkai would not blame all of guilt on himself if he were to pull away.
Hakkai nodded.
Gojyo kissed his way down from Hakkai's chin all the way down to just above one of Hakkai's nipples and he paused there, keeping his eyes locked with the healer. No discomfort. No fright. Gojyo let his tongue slip from between his lips and delivered one long lick to Hakkai's chest.
Hakkai could have died there. He would not care if he died right then and there. The feeling of Gojyo's mouth on his chest! It drove Hakkai absolutely wild!
Gojyo licked Hakkai's chest again. The brunette's head was thrown back and he nearly screamed. Of course, it was when Gojyo took Hakkai's nipple in his mouth and began to twirl his tongue around it that Hakkai screamed in pleasure.
"Gojyo! Gojyo! Gojyo!" Hakkai panted repeatedly every time Gojyo sucked at his lover's nipple. "Oh, God, Gojyo! I love you! I love you!"
Hakkai tried his best to prevent his chest from slamming forward, further into Gojyo's mouth. He bit his lip. He clenched his fists. But sooner or later, he found that he could not help himself as he pushed his chest out with something of a half - heartedly stiffled moan of Gojyo's name.
Gojyo sensed the feeling of distress coming over Hakkai and he murmured, "It's alright, baby."
"But, Gojyo...!" Hakkai panted.
"Don't be ashamed."
Those words were all that Hakkai needed as he smiled through the rain and forced his hands free of Gojyo's grasp on his wrists.
The half - breed nibbled affectionately on his lover's chest and the former teacher used all his self - control to keep from screaming. Slowly, he placed his hands on Gojyo's back, his wrists reaching just barely over his shoulders and resting on his shoulder - blades. Gojyo stopped what he was doing and looked up, meeting Hakkai's gaze with equal passion and tenderness.
Gojyo kissed Hakkai once more. He smiled into it as he felt Hakkai's hands toy with his hair and attempt to find their right place. The red - haired man's tongue shot right into the brunette's mouth. Hakkai loved it; all of it.
"Oh, Gojyo," Hakkai whispered when their lips had parted. "You are my shine in the storm [2]."
Gojyo's lips lifted into a tender smile and their lips met again.
Hakkai's nervousness suddenly flooded back to him when Gojyo's hand slid down his chest. It was right above his abdominal area, but it kept travelling lower. Hakkai did not break the kiss, but his body tensed up once more. The red - haired half - breed's fingers worked their way down Hakkai's chest, swirving here and curving there to explore the other man's muscle curves. Hakkai's eyes shot open. His hand went to far. Gojyo's fingerpads brushed over the hidious scar of the brunette's abdomen, bringing back all of the horrible memories of his past: all of the youkai, killing them and the knife he used to do it; Kanan, the prison cell, Chin Iisou, and the hidious screams of every single one of them. Everything went so fast, like a horrifying slideshow being run in his head. Someone pushed the button and Hakkai could not move. The picture flahed on the screen: the picture of the bloody room with the corpses and the blood, all of it. 'You see?' a voice murmured harshly into his ear, refering to the picture. 'You killed them all! And for what!?' The pain from the scar came back and if felt like he had just recieved it all over again. He pushed Gojyo away but in his haste to relieve himself of the terrible images, he tumbled over the various roots of the tree they were taking shelter under and rolled over a good three times before stopping, outside of the scant protection of the tree, the rain pouring over him and causing his hair to fall and frame his face. His pants became soaked with rain and his palms dirty with mud.
"Oh, my God...," Gojyo muttered. He seemed to know just what it was he had done wrong. "Hakkai.... Dear God, I'm so sorry!"
"It....," Hakkai stopped. He couldn't speak. "It... sounds like...," his hands flew over his ears while a painfl grimace spread over his face, "ringing! The rain sounds like ringing!"
"Hakkai...."
"And there's that bastard!" Hakkai threw his glance to the ground as he felt himself go numb with rage at his past. "That," he paused and then he spat, "bastard!" His voice then changed to something of a high - pitched whining, something that would be used to imitate another person but from the same speaker, "You happy yet?" Hakkai again, "How in the world could I be?"
The voice: "You killed then all, damn it."
Hakkai: "I know I did! Leave me alone!"
The voice: "You aren't satisyed yet!?"
Hakkai: "Why did you take her away from me!? She was all I had! She was all I wanted! Take someone else! Why didn't you leave us in peace!?"
It seemed then that Hakkai was picked up and placed back in present time and he muttered, "And then the scar. The damned scar. Send me to Hell now! I don't understand!" He pounded a fist in the muddy ground and left it there as he began to sob, "I don't understand! Why didn't they just kill me!?"
"Hakkai!" Gojyo lunged forward just as Hakkai's fist was about to pound the soaked ground once more. Gojyo wrapped his arms around Hakkai's upper arms, restraining any movement that he would make. "Stop this, Hakkai! It was not your fault!"
The brunette's eyes seemed to lose their colour and his mouth was open in heavy breathing. He looked at Gojyo.
"Gonou died... years ago." Gojyo rose a hand up and brushed Hakkai's hair from his right eye, the one that had been torn out and he kissed it, the brunette closing both eyes softly as he listened to both Gojyo and the pounding rain all around and atop them. Hakkai fell forward, right into Gojyo's embrace as he let himself go limp. Gojyo's arms loosened around his lover and the former teacher worked one arm free and pounded futily on Gojyo's shoulder, but it didn't hurt in the least. Instead, it was more of a tired, worn - out slap. Hakkai's head was buried in Gojyo's other shoulder and he cried into it, saying things like,
"I don't understand!" And, "Why didn't they just kill me?"
"Because...," Gojyo began, "We're supposed to be this way." He paused. "Only God would know the reason.... But I bet he must have had a plan." He pulled Hakkai off of him and smiled through both tears and rain as he concentrated his gaze on nothing else but the man before him and he continued, "Because...
You were born to be my baby... and I was made to be your man...."
*End Chapter #9*
Author Notes:
[1] Yes! Great minds think alike! I had fun on the math field trip so I bought a DVD when we went to the mall and it was Trigun (WHOOOO!!). It was the one where Wolfwood makes his first appearance. You know the part where that woman leaves her child behind by accident and then Vash and Wolfwood go all gun - ho (no pun intended) and both leap off of opposite sides of the bus. When they land, Vash is like, "What're you doing here?" And Wolfwood goes, "I'm going to save the child!" See? Great minds think alike!
[2] Oh, yes, shine in the storm. Actually, I was listening to "Shine in the Storm" from Mobile Suit: Gundam 08th MS Team when I wrote this and I go, "Hey! It's raining in the story!" So I put that in there. Isn't it sweet?
Oh my God! I can't believe I had the actual willpower to write all the way up to the END of chapter NINE! Only six reviews, but I guess good things come to those who wait.... Yeah, sure they do. When I was nine, I waited three years for a Vegeta x Bulma doujinshi. Did I get it even four years later? No! Not like I want it anymore, though. Ha ha.
Please look forward to the next chapter! Ah! Chapter #10! We'll have a bash since 10 is a good number (I guess).
Ja!
Author: ¤Sha¤GojyoxCho¤Hakkai¤
Date: Began March, 2003
Chapter: 9/?
Rating: Uh - oh! It kinda depends on what you classify as R and PG - 13. Most people would say that this is R! *evil laugh* Don't worry. No Lemon.
Category: Romance, Angst, Language, Blood and the like
Main Pairing: Gojyo x Hakkai
Disclaimer: I do not own Gensomaden Saiyuki. All characters, names, etc. are copyrighted to Minekura Kazuya.
Warning: Shounen ai/yaoi (for you people who don't speak Japanese, that's male/male relationships.... isn't it cute? *smiles*)
*Still.... in.... flashback....!*
Please read and review, seeing as Guardian of Jupiter has been the only one being very loyal and doing so. *smiles*
Note: Chapters will be put up a little slower near May 20th, and until May 24th because there will be final exams. (I want good teachers for eighth grade ple - e - e - ase! *sobs*)
Alright! Chapter Nine! *glomps Vash* Love and Peace!!
_____________
Part Ninth (9/?)
They both smiled and pressed their lips to each other's.
But this time was different for some reason. 'Each kiss will be different,' is what they told themselves. There was a strange stinging emotion hanging in the air and it made them feel like they had all the time in the world to do whatever they wanted. This is why they kept their eyes open then: both of them. They had both thought the same at the exact same time. Great minds think alike, right? [1] It was right then that Gojyo realized what passion burned in Hakkai's eyes when they had kissed those many times before. It was something like a burning emerald wild fire that blazed within those eyes. But one was dim. One was not there at all. It was the eye that he had torn out. However, Gojyo knew that if Hakkai could have it, he would have wanted that amazing fire to blaze in both of his eyes. Gojyo knew that there was a fire behind Hakkai's other eye....
Hakkai experienced the same as his vision remained locked strictly to Gojyo's gorgeous eyes. He felt like telling Gojyo what he saw, but fear of breaking the kiss immediately shattered the notion. Reluctantly, Gojyo separated their lips, keeping his eyes locked with the other man's.
"G - Gojyo," Hakkai murmured. Gojyo could see (and feel) that the sleeping bag in which they both were in was far too hot for both of them that night. Factoring in, with the warmth of the covers, the musky, rainy air and each other's body heat, the red - haired man heaved a sigh that soothed his lungs and throat and asked,
"Is this too hot?"
"What?" Hakkai almost whispered.
"It's too hot for me, baby." Then he laughed, "So are you. Too hot for me."
Hakkai brought his head under Gojyo's chin and snuggled himself inward. "Nothing's too hot for you."
Gojyo reached back and pulled on the zipper of the sleeping bag, letting himself out reluctantly, but taking Hakkai with him, pulling him up gently by his shoulders until they were both in a sitting position.
"We were just complaining about how cold it was a few minutes ago," Gojyo chuckled, "and now, we both think it's too hot?"
Hakkai laughed but said nothing afterward and Gojyo stood up and invited Hakkai.
"Why are we here of all places?" Hakkai asked as Gojyo led him to underneath the only tree for miles. 'And why didn't I see this tree here before?'
"Can we just stay here for a while, Hakkai?" Gojyo inquired. It was then that Hakkai really wished that he had stayed back in the tent, in the warm, dry sleeping bag, instead of being out in the rain, dripping wet and freezing. He shivered and sneezed. "Please?" But when Gojyo said that, Hakkai agreed and sat down next to him, underneath the tree.
"Gojyo?"
"Yes?"
"Say it again. Will you?"
"Hakkai?"
Hakkai put his arms around one of Gojyo's and leant against his shoulder, closing his eyes.
"Are you alright with this?" Gojyo querried as one of his hands found its way to Hakkai's cheek, lifting his head to make eye contact with him. "Even if it's raining like this?"
Hakkai blinked as a raindrop fell from his hair and into one of his eyes but none of his other facial features changed and he leant into Gojyo's touch as he always did and answered truthfully, "Yes."
"Damn it," Gojyo cursed quite seriously.
"What?"
"Do you know how much I want you?"
That statement almost frightened Hakkai then and his face conveyed that. Gojyo apologized, silently and prepared to pull himself into a standing position but Hakkai protested then and Gojyo looked down to him. "Tell me," Hakkai whispered. "Tell me how much you want me, then, Gojyo."
Gojyo felt the warmth of Hakkai's hand in his own and felt the dripping raindrops from the leaves of the branches above but the strongest feeling inside of him was the feeling of adoration for the other man he was with. The brunette pulled Gojyo down, back to sitting beside him, back so he could lean against his shoulder and it was then that Gojyo's words shot their way through Hakkai's thoughts when the red - haired half - breed said, "Why don't I show you?"
Hakkai felt Gojyo's hands on his shoulders and begin to massage his neck tenderly. And with a kiss, Hakkai said no more. He was lying on the ground, his head thrown back and Gojyo over him, straddling his thighs and leaning over to kiss him. The brunette's hands were fastened to the back of Gojyo's head. Hakkai's eyes were half - lidded, his monocle lying on the other side of the tree trunk to prevent it being scratched or broken and his lips were parted and swollen from the multiple kisses that had been shared between he and Gojyo.
Gojyo was feeling the same as he leant down for another passionate kiss that involved his tongue in Hakkai's mouth and Hakkai's tongue nearly down his throat and Gojyo groaned at this from deep down within the deepest bowels of himself. When they parted, between their lips was a trail of saliva and Gojyo reached to wipe off the trail from Hakkai's lips.
And Gojyo felt like crying then, just from the beautiful sight that was layed out in front of him; we wanted to cry because he loved Hakkai so much. Right then, he realized that this was really the first time that he had ever taken things in a relationship so slowly. This was the first time that lust did not completely consume him and lock him into its cage, but it was when Gojyo really thought about more than someone's body. A key out of the cage. The look of Hakkai laying so trusting in front of him, his body was fully relaxed: he trusted him. He trusted Gojyo.
Hakkai put his arms behind him and pushed himself up with a small amount of effort until he was leaning back on one of his elbows and with his other hand, well, it found its way to the scarred cheek that belonged to the half - breed over him. "You know, there have only been two people I can trust in this world," Hakkai remarked. Gojyo froze. "And you are one of them."
Gojyo's eyes filled with glimmering tears that ran down his cheeks with no shame as he went forward and wrapped his arms around Hakkai's shoulders, burrying his face in Hakkai's shoulder and whispering a muffled endearment, "I love you, baby."
"Gojyo...," Hakkai smiled and hugged the other man close. "I love you, too."
"Forever," Gojyo continued, his voice almost in a monotone, so there was really no way to tell if it was his promise or an inquizition.
At the exact same time, they pulled away only enough to see each other's faces and vowed, "I'll love you forever."
Hakkai's hand slapped over his mouth and he turned his head away from Gojyo, almost embarassed, scared.
"Hakkai?"
His breathing hurried. His chest hurt. "That," Hakkai tried but his voice really could not come to him; but he tried, "That is... exactly what... Kanan and I used to say." A single tear rolled down his cheek. "We always did. Right when we woke up and right when we would sleep, even... see each other every moment, we would say it... at the same time... 'I'll love you forever.'"
"Hakkai!" Gojyo nearly yelled. "Don't say things like that! You still love her! It was not your fault!"
"We've been through this before, Gojyo."
"We've been through the 'Replacement' misunderstanding, too." Gojyo stated solemnly.
Hakkai's eyes were filled with fear. "Damn me...," he murmured, most likely to himself. "God... damn me!"
"Hakkai?"
Suddenly, a smile broke from Hakkai's lips and his honey - sweet laughter soothed his lover over him and the brunette said, through his tears, "God damn me because I was in love with my sister...," it was then that he took Gojyo's hand in his own and placed it over his chest, in a place where he could feel his racing heartbeat, "and now I'm homosexual."
It was not long until they were sharing more passionate kisses and craving each other's lips more than anything else. And it was right then that Gojyo's words broke through Hakkai's thoughts and he inquired, forcing the question through his panting lips, "Hakkai... Do you also wish the celebrate the... solution to the misunderstanding... that we've found?"
"What?"
"That little 'fight' that we've had is over, right? Why don't we kick it on its way then?" Gojyo winked.
Hakkai said nothing but instead, pulled Gojyo down for another loving kiss, pushing Gojyo's hand onto his chest and saying, "Gojyo, feel my heart."
"It's beating so fast!"
"It's because I'm happy. I'm anxious," he paused, "and a little scared, too."
Gojyo knew that both he and Hakkai disagreed to go "all the way" then and there. But, still, Hakkai had the right to be a little frightened, which meant that Gojyo had the right to comfort him and he leant over and placed his lips next to one of Hakkai's ears and whispered, "You do not have to be scared, love. I'll never hurt you." After those words, Gojyo delved his tongue sensually deep into Hakkai's ear, the brunette giving a cry of something between shock and delight and put his hands to Gojyo's back, gripping Gojyo's vest and letting a gasp escape his lips here and there.
"G - Gojyo...," Hakkai cried breathlessly as he felt his lover's lips move to the spot right behind his ear, the sensetive spot, and Hakkai felt his knees go weak, even though he was not standing. Gojyo's hands worked nervously and shakingly at the small red buttons and strings that kept Hakkai's shirt from falling open.
"Goj- -!" But he was cut off by a kiss and Gojyo reminded him,
"Remember, I won't hurt you. I'd rather die than hurt you, Hakkai."
Hakkai let his eyes slip shut as Gojyo worked impatiently at the buttons until all four of them were undone. He looked to Hakkai and requested, "Put your hands over your head? I want the ultimate image of you, baby."
The green - eyed man gave a genuine smile before lifting his arms over his head; this action caused a small amount of flesh to be exposed from his chest and it took all that Gojyo could to keep from moaning from the wonderful sight. He leant over to kiss the older man and while that was happening, he was able to undo the purple sash that ran from shoulder to waist diagonally across the other man's chest and pull back his shirt somewhat, but not before recieving a sudden, and what sounded like, frightened gasp.
Gojyo pulled back slightly, enough to gaze into Hakkai's face, enough to make sure that there was no negative emotion show there. Hakkai's eyes were glazed with tears but he was able to blink them back and give a comforting smile as Gojyo leant down and pressed his lips to Hakkai's flawness neck. The brunette groaned and threw his head back as he felt Gojyo nip and suck at his neck.
There was another kiss laid by Gojyo to Hakkai's lips and when they parted reluctantly, Gojyo found Hakkai's eyes half - lidded and his lips parted in heavier breathing. His arms were still over his head and Gojyo found a very surprising detail that suddenly Hakkai noticed as well as they both blushed red so terribly that it did not seem to be a colour any longer. Because Gojyo found himself straddling Hakkai's thighs, the brunette could feel the growing heat between the half - breed's legs.
He suddenly noticed that their shoes were gone. Gojyo was pushing the cloth of Hakkai's shirt off of his shoulders slowly, pressing his lips to the pale skin and kissing every bit that was revealed to him.
Gojyo's lips travelled past Hakkai's collarbone and this was where the former teacher found himself uncomfotable as his body tensed and Gojyo's kisses travelled over finely shaped chest muscles. The red - haired man noticed and paused, looking up from the brunette's chest and locking their eyes like so many times before. "Hakkai," Gojyo whispered. "Baby, if you tell me to stop, I will. You know I will."
But these words did not seem to get through to him, as his state of nervousness had not settled one bit. Gojyo pushed himself upwards and laid a hearfelt, passionate, loving kiss to Hakkai's lips, transferring the message that he did not seem to understand.
'You tell me to stop and I will.'
'You promise?'
'Baby, of course I do.'
Hakkai bit his lip until it almost bled but Gojyo stopped him by brushing his lips against Hakkai's in the most feather soft kiss he had ever felt and Hakkai's thoughts wandered to nothing outside of the red - haired man atop him. He never thought that he would feel for his best friend this way but feelings change over time. This thought brought tears to the brunette's eyes, which ran freely down his cheeks.
The rain pounded more insanely now, the dropplets so huge that someone would think them to be hail if they heard them pounding against a surface... the tent! Sanzo and Goku were still in the tent! What if they woke up and found Gojyo and Hakkai there in the midst of their celebration!? 'Oh, to Hell with what they think,' Hakkai pondered. 'Their opinion won't change the fact that I love him. I love Sha Gojyo.'
More tears came. Hakkai thought them to be tears of joy, happiness, for he did not know that he could be so madly in love as this. And as the rain continued to pound, the branches of the single tree they were under fitering them out, the couple still remained drenched, not only in water but in their love for each other. Gojyo pushed himself up somewhat and pressed his lips to Hakkai's cheeks where the tears were rolling down his face, his long scarlet tresses falling over his shoulders and tickling Hakkai's neck.
Gojyo kisses every one of Hakkai's tears away.
Before they knew it, Gojyo found that his lips resumed their eager exploration of the slightly smaller man beneath him and after they had passed his collarbone, his hand found its way up to the end of Hakkai's shirt and he opened it fully, revealing Hakkai's chest entirely.
Gojyo's eyes travelled past Hakkai's flawness neck to gaze upon beautiful chest muscles and perfect abodominals that were disrupted in their flow by a hideous gash that ran across Hakkai's abdomen. The brunette turned his glance elsewhere when he saw that Gojyo's eyes had fallen upon the scar. But when his eyes returned to the red - haired man's, he saw that Gojyo was looking him up and down once again, pausing at the pair of nipples that, Hakkai guessed, were the reason he opened his shirt in the first place.
Gojyo gazed down to his lover: his shirt was wide open, slipping off of his shoulders, his arms over his head. Gojyo groaned. It was the most magnificent sight he had ever seen and he kissed Hakkai once more, for all the love he possessed could not be expressed through kisses, no matter how many, but Gojyo wanted to get as close as he could. He wanted to stay with Hakkai like this forever and just stare at him forever. He wanted to kiss him forever and he wanted to touch him forever.
Hakkai gasped deeply into the kiss as he felt Gojyo's hands slide from where the hem of his pants were, over his abdominal muscles, and stopping where Hakkai's nipples were. The feather - soft touch of Gojyo's fingertips sliding up his body drove Hakkai almost wild and he would not be surprised right then and there if Gojyo asked if he could make sweet, passionate love him him right there. If it was with Gojyo, he would. If it was with the man that he loved, he would. He would do anything for Gojyo.
But he was not ready for that yet.
Hakkai broke the kiss suddenly when he felt Gojyo's fingers begin to tease at his nipples and he groaned, threw his head back, letting Gojyo know that he loved what was being given to him.
The brunette's chest was heaving now. His eyes were shut and his mouth open. Gojyo leant over and began to kiss Hakkai's neck once more, savoring every single bit of Hakkai's flesh.
Not only was Gojyo's arousal getting unbearably tight within the confides of his pants, but both he and his lover were soaking wet, the moonlight giving emphasis to every detail on their bodies. Gojyo felt Hakkai's flesh, running one hand down his front until he reached the hem of Hakkai's pants. Hakkai moaned once more and Gojyo could not help himself as he did too. God, he loved the sound of Hakkai in pleasure. He had no idea that the sounds of Hakkai's passion would get him so hard!
The red - haired man continued to fondle with Hakkai's chest, extracting eager moans from his love beneath him. Gojyo slowed the ministrations and kissed Hakkai's shoulder as he ran his fingertips over Hakkai's nipples time and time again. The former teacher suddenly did not care what Gojyo said and he rose his arms up and wrapped them around Gojyo's neck, pulling closer.
The hot wind blew in a humid smell of rain and dust. Hakkai gasped. The rain became heavier and ran its way through the branches of the tree overhead and Gojyo felt it rain down upon them.
Gojyo had a change of plans in mind. Not as different as the position they were in at the time, but the red - haired man found it to be a wonderful intention. He rose up from where he was, removing his fingers from Hakkai's nipples and placing the healer against the treetrunk so that they were facing each other. Hakkai's face was plastered with confusion but he understood what Gojyo planned to do with him once the former general resumed his position of straddling Hakkai's thighs.
Hakkai smiled in the darkness of the night and the humid air of the rain as he felt Gojyo's kisses on his neck once more and Gojyo's hands gently fondling and twisting his nipples. "Mm, Gojyo," Hakkai groaned.
"Oh, Hakkai, do you love it?" Gojyo asked, his voice muffled because he was nuzzling the brunette's neck affectionately.
"Oh, Gojyo!" Hakkai nearly screamed when Gojyo rubbed Hakkai's nipples between his thumb and forefinger. "I love it! Oh, I love it!" He paused to catch his breath and he murmured, "I love you!" And his hands began to work at Gojyo's vest, tugging it off as best he could. Gojyo paused and gave Hakkai a look like, 'What is it, baby?' but Hakkai just shook his head and explained, "Gojyo, I want to see you, too... please?"
"Of course, baby."
Gojyo reluctantly let Hakkai's nipples go from his fingers and leant back somewhat and let Hakkai remove his vest, placing it neatly a few feet away from them. Gojyo's white sleeveless shirt was gone and Hakkai immediately wrapped his arms around Gojyo's shoulders, pulling him closer to kiss him.
During the kiss, Gojyo felt Hakkai's hands slide down his chest. The red - haired man was surprised and his eyes widened when he felt the brunette's fingers run over his nipples but he did not break the kiss.
Gojyo could not take it anymore and he broke the kiss and left the green - eyed man thunderstruck. "G - Gojyo?" The red - haired man quickly seized Hakkai's wrists gently and pulled them over both of their heads, pinning them to the tree trunk.
"Remember," Gojyo's voice was solemn as he spoke, yet at the same time, sweet, loving, and sexy, "that if you tell me to stop, I will." He said this partly in fear and partly in protection. He wanted to remind Hakkai that if he did anythig that made him uncomfortable, he should tell him, but he also said that so that Hakkai would not blame all of guilt on himself if he were to pull away.
Hakkai nodded.
Gojyo kissed his way down from Hakkai's chin all the way down to just above one of Hakkai's nipples and he paused there, keeping his eyes locked with the healer. No discomfort. No fright. Gojyo let his tongue slip from between his lips and delivered one long lick to Hakkai's chest.
Hakkai could have died there. He would not care if he died right then and there. The feeling of Gojyo's mouth on his chest! It drove Hakkai absolutely wild!
Gojyo licked Hakkai's chest again. The brunette's head was thrown back and he nearly screamed. Of course, it was when Gojyo took Hakkai's nipple in his mouth and began to twirl his tongue around it that Hakkai screamed in pleasure.
"Gojyo! Gojyo! Gojyo!" Hakkai panted repeatedly every time Gojyo sucked at his lover's nipple. "Oh, God, Gojyo! I love you! I love you!"
Hakkai tried his best to prevent his chest from slamming forward, further into Gojyo's mouth. He bit his lip. He clenched his fists. But sooner or later, he found that he could not help himself as he pushed his chest out with something of a half - heartedly stiffled moan of Gojyo's name.
Gojyo sensed the feeling of distress coming over Hakkai and he murmured, "It's alright, baby."
"But, Gojyo...!" Hakkai panted.
"Don't be ashamed."
Those words were all that Hakkai needed as he smiled through the rain and forced his hands free of Gojyo's grasp on his wrists.
The half - breed nibbled affectionately on his lover's chest and the former teacher used all his self - control to keep from screaming. Slowly, he placed his hands on Gojyo's back, his wrists reaching just barely over his shoulders and resting on his shoulder - blades. Gojyo stopped what he was doing and looked up, meeting Hakkai's gaze with equal passion and tenderness.
Gojyo kissed Hakkai once more. He smiled into it as he felt Hakkai's hands toy with his hair and attempt to find their right place. The red - haired man's tongue shot right into the brunette's mouth. Hakkai loved it; all of it.
"Oh, Gojyo," Hakkai whispered when their lips had parted. "You are my shine in the storm [2]."
Gojyo's lips lifted into a tender smile and their lips met again.
Hakkai's nervousness suddenly flooded back to him when Gojyo's hand slid down his chest. It was right above his abdominal area, but it kept travelling lower. Hakkai did not break the kiss, but his body tensed up once more. The red - haired half - breed's fingers worked their way down Hakkai's chest, swirving here and curving there to explore the other man's muscle curves. Hakkai's eyes shot open. His hand went to far. Gojyo's fingerpads brushed over the hidious scar of the brunette's abdomen, bringing back all of the horrible memories of his past: all of the youkai, killing them and the knife he used to do it; Kanan, the prison cell, Chin Iisou, and the hidious screams of every single one of them. Everything went so fast, like a horrifying slideshow being run in his head. Someone pushed the button and Hakkai could not move. The picture flahed on the screen: the picture of the bloody room with the corpses and the blood, all of it. 'You see?' a voice murmured harshly into his ear, refering to the picture. 'You killed them all! And for what!?' The pain from the scar came back and if felt like he had just recieved it all over again. He pushed Gojyo away but in his haste to relieve himself of the terrible images, he tumbled over the various roots of the tree they were taking shelter under and rolled over a good three times before stopping, outside of the scant protection of the tree, the rain pouring over him and causing his hair to fall and frame his face. His pants became soaked with rain and his palms dirty with mud.
"Oh, my God...," Gojyo muttered. He seemed to know just what it was he had done wrong. "Hakkai.... Dear God, I'm so sorry!"
"It....," Hakkai stopped. He couldn't speak. "It... sounds like...," his hands flew over his ears while a painfl grimace spread over his face, "ringing! The rain sounds like ringing!"
"Hakkai...."
"And there's that bastard!" Hakkai threw his glance to the ground as he felt himself go numb with rage at his past. "That," he paused and then he spat, "bastard!" His voice then changed to something of a high - pitched whining, something that would be used to imitate another person but from the same speaker, "You happy yet?" Hakkai again, "How in the world could I be?"
The voice: "You killed then all, damn it."
Hakkai: "I know I did! Leave me alone!"
The voice: "You aren't satisyed yet!?"
Hakkai: "Why did you take her away from me!? She was all I had! She was all I wanted! Take someone else! Why didn't you leave us in peace!?"
It seemed then that Hakkai was picked up and placed back in present time and he muttered, "And then the scar. The damned scar. Send me to Hell now! I don't understand!" He pounded a fist in the muddy ground and left it there as he began to sob, "I don't understand! Why didn't they just kill me!?"
"Hakkai!" Gojyo lunged forward just as Hakkai's fist was about to pound the soaked ground once more. Gojyo wrapped his arms around Hakkai's upper arms, restraining any movement that he would make. "Stop this, Hakkai! It was not your fault!"
The brunette's eyes seemed to lose their colour and his mouth was open in heavy breathing. He looked at Gojyo.
"Gonou died... years ago." Gojyo rose a hand up and brushed Hakkai's hair from his right eye, the one that had been torn out and he kissed it, the brunette closing both eyes softly as he listened to both Gojyo and the pounding rain all around and atop them. Hakkai fell forward, right into Gojyo's embrace as he let himself go limp. Gojyo's arms loosened around his lover and the former teacher worked one arm free and pounded futily on Gojyo's shoulder, but it didn't hurt in the least. Instead, it was more of a tired, worn - out slap. Hakkai's head was buried in Gojyo's other shoulder and he cried into it, saying things like,
"I don't understand!" And, "Why didn't they just kill me?"
"Because...," Gojyo began, "We're supposed to be this way." He paused. "Only God would know the reason.... But I bet he must have had a plan." He pulled Hakkai off of him and smiled through both tears and rain as he concentrated his gaze on nothing else but the man before him and he continued, "Because...
You were born to be my baby... and I was made to be your man...."
*End Chapter #9*
Author Notes:
[1] Yes! Great minds think alike! I had fun on the math field trip so I bought a DVD when we went to the mall and it was Trigun (WHOOOO!!). It was the one where Wolfwood makes his first appearance. You know the part where that woman leaves her child behind by accident and then Vash and Wolfwood go all gun - ho (no pun intended) and both leap off of opposite sides of the bus. When they land, Vash is like, "What're you doing here?" And Wolfwood goes, "I'm going to save the child!" See? Great minds think alike!
[2] Oh, yes, shine in the storm. Actually, I was listening to "Shine in the Storm" from Mobile Suit: Gundam 08th MS Team when I wrote this and I go, "Hey! It's raining in the story!" So I put that in there. Isn't it sweet?
Oh my God! I can't believe I had the actual willpower to write all the way up to the END of chapter NINE! Only six reviews, but I guess good things come to those who wait.... Yeah, sure they do. When I was nine, I waited three years for a Vegeta x Bulma doujinshi. Did I get it even four years later? No! Not like I want it anymore, though. Ha ha.
Please look forward to the next chapter! Ah! Chapter #10! We'll have a bash since 10 is a good number (I guess).
Ja!