"Onee-chan?" Kiku called timidly into the darkened room, not sure if her sister was either gone on another mission or sleeping. There was no response to her soft entreaty. Disappointment and fading hope burgeoned within her. Perhaps she was lounging on the roof?
Before the princess turned away to close the shoji frame, she heard something move within the room's shadowy confines. She turned back quickly to peer into the dim quarters. There was then a soft sigh. An accompaniment of musical chimes danced in to fill the hollow silence. Kiku brightened at the melody and then started fumbling through her kimono sleeves for her own matching pair. She gave a silent gasp of delight and dangled the bells. Swinging them in a happy rhythm the Sisters Bells rang together in harmony, its music lifting in the air in bittersweet tones.
After some time the song faded and Kiku giggled gleefully. She stopped when she realized that she was laughing alone. Puzzled, she tilted her head off to one side in confusion. Wasn't she enjoying herself as well? Concerned she took a few cautious steps into the room vaguely feeling like an intruder invading some private sanctuary.
She found her in front of some memorial. It was built of fine black lacquered wood in the shape of a modest temple atop a short dais. Some scriptures of blessings adorned the walls within the small shrine surrounding an offering carefully placed in the shrine's center. Memorial tablets and incense graced a small platform at the shrine's base where Ayame was kneeling in solemn silence. Smoke from the still burning incense drifted in lazy patterns instilling the faint fragrance of wood sandal amidst the subdued atmosphere of the room. She made no signs of movement when Kiku settled down beside her.
"Onee-chan?"
Ayame lifted her bowed head, as she seemed to return from some reverie. Her expression was unreadable to the princess, but she sensed something weighing heavily behind the indifferent mask. Ayame seemed to finally notice the princess' presence when her small hand rested upon her own. She saw the girl's unease and attempted to smooth her worries with a small, feigned smile.
"Nan da, Kiku?" The princess was comforted somewhat by the contrived act, but didn't seem completely fooled by the pretense. Ayame inwardly winced. Was it that obvious?
"Is there something wrong?" Kiku asked carefully. Ayame gave her little sister a more genuine smile this time.
"No…nothing's wrong. I was just…" she paused a little in reflection, choosing her next words with care. "Thinking about something when you just came in that's all." She fingered the small bead bracelet she was holding along with her bells and seemed to return to her brooding. She flushed a little embarrassed when she remembered something.
"I'm sorry, Kiku…I forgot. Was there something you wanted?" The princess shook her dainty head and gave a playful grin.
"I just wanted you to come out and play with me. Teach me some more about becoming a ninja!" she cried excitedly. She tugged at Ayame's limp hands eagerly urging her to rise with her to go outside. Ayame didn't share in Kiku's enthusiasm and remained seated upon the mats, leaving Kiku hovering above her in animated excitement still holding her hands. Gently, Ayame withdrew her hands from Kiku's inviting palms and returned them to lie upon her lap. She kept her gaze turned away so as to not see the crestfallen look pierce the girl's aura of exuberance.
"Maybe, a little later, Kiku."
The princess flopped down beside her again, trying to look up to see Ayame's face through her bangs. The girl gave a childish pout of disappointment as she tried to catch the other's eye. Then innocuously, as only a child could, she gave her older sister an impish smile as some notion dawned upon her. Her curiosity was suddenly renewed as she leaned forward.
"What were you thinking about, Onee-chan?" She watched bemused as Ayame stiffened at the inquiry.
Her mind searched for the appropriate vague response. "Many things…"
"Like what?" Kiku pursued in a harmless manner. The princess eyed the bracelet her sister was absently fingering and recognized it to be a string of prayer beads. It was simple, yet elegant in design. The small wooden spheres of polished ebony threaded by a thin red cord.
The kunoichi's instincts considered how much of her thoughts she should reveal to the princess and then bit her lip in self-reprimand. And felt that deceit of any degree within the bond of sisterhood was unforgivable. Unconsciously, Ayame held the beads tighter in her hand. "I was remembering that today is the last day," she said, her voice soft with emotion. She glanced down at the princess making sure she was listening. The girl was all ears. Ayame continued.
"In our clan…" Ayame winced at the phrase. The reality of that it now consisted only she and clans brother still pained her somewhat, the image of the crude burial mounds and cremation ceremony at the village in her mind's eye. "In my clan," she rephrased, "it is a tradition of the Azuma that one should take a year to mourn the lost of a member or those gone after their deaths…So as to not forget the sacrifices they made for the clan, for the family." She was silent for sometime and the princess spoke up in query.
"Is today the end of that year?" Ayame did not move to answer immediately, but Kiku could already sense contents the reply.
"How come Rikimaru isn't here with you too?" The question caught Ayame slightly off guard and she mulled over her words before responding.
"We choose to remember…in our own ways, Kiku." The princess seemed to contemplate this before asking again.
"What do you do after the year is over?" Ayame paused to consider.
"We say goodbye," She said simply and Ayame turned back to praying before the small shrine.
*********
Later that day, as the sun began to near the end of its eastwardly journey, Ayame arrived to a small memorial at the edge of the cliff outside the castle. It was a simple, unmarked monument made of stones neatly arranged overlooking the sea. She had come bearing flowers, but was surprised to find a fresh bouquet already laid at the base of the stones. Ayame gave a sad smile. Rikimaru must have come earlier during the day to pay his respects. She kneeled down to place her own flowers.
She raised a reverent hand to the stone. What could she say to express the turmoil she had always felt? Tatsu…The name stirred so much more within her now than a year ago. The love she held for this man, the betrayal and horror of his actions, and the evitable hurt that he had chosen death, over the that life he could have had. What words could ever fully convey this…she had given up on finding them long ago. Ayame now spoke what she had set out to do when she first came out here.
"Sayonara," she said softly. She turned to walk back to the castle, and never once looked back.
A/N: Kind of depressing, but hey, what do ya expect? But I wanted to do something where she gets some closure you know. In case you were wondering here is a mini glossary of the Japanese terms used:
Onee-chan – Roughly translated to big sister. It's what Kiku calls Ayame in Japanese so…yeah
Shoji – basically those wooden framed sliding doors
Nan da – what is it
Kunoichi – female ninja
Sayonara – goodbye/farewell [duh]