A/N: Muse is still a no-show. I haven't got writers block, think it of a drain. With writers block being a total stoppage, while with me it's more like something's stopping the majority of ideas from flowing. I can still write, but it's a bit choppy. Revisions will follow.
"Is the Brotherhood still following us?" Hank asked Rahne, who was quite happy hanging her head out of the window.
"Yup." She pulled her head in to answer then returned to hanging half out.
"Scott? Ororo? I think we should pull over, find out what the Brotherhood wants." Storm's voice crackled over the radio.
"They want to help me slowly destroy each and every mall in this nation! Every single one! Destroy! The malls must go!"
"If Alvers and his buddies are looking for a fight, that's what they'll get! What's that Professor? Oh, yeah, we better pull over." Scott could barely hide the disappointment in his voice.
All three vans pulled over, and the Brotherhood jeep did, closely followed by the Acolytes. Scott and a few others exited. Rogue and Rahne remained inside the one van, both were fast asleep. And they were both talking.
"Hey, doan shoot, or attack, or whatever it is yous about to do. We wanna talk. Nice and friendly like." Remy had been elected as spokesperson for the Acolytes. Piotr's accent made understanding him difficult, Sabretooth would only growl, (A/N: See! I remembered him!) Pietro was hiding in the van, and John just didn't seem to be the right person.
"The same goes for us." Lance was unofficially elected, because he could say more than three words without saying 'yo', and could think and speak at the same time. Plus Wanda was sitting in stony silence, and had been completely oblivious to all attempts to ask her if she was fine with the idea of trying to bum some free food and shelter off Xavier.
"Talk fast, before I blast you all through…um," Scott looked around, trying to find something to blast them all through. "Empty field." He finished lamely. Very lamely.
"Well, it we lost our leader, so can we hook up wid yous, and borrow your leader?"
"Same goes for us. Mystique dragged us out here and then get 'detained' at the border."
"I know! The Brotherhood can come if they know what state we're in, and the Acolytes if they can figure out who screamed!"
"Um, Tabitha?" Roberto began, "Canada has provinces."
"Well whatever! The meaning is still the same! So, can any of you guys figure it out?" The Acolytes and Brotherhood gathered in two different huddles.
"I think your mate Shades over there is a screamer."
"I have to agree with St. John." Piotr said in his slow way. Sabretooth's contribution was a growl that sounded like 'Logan'.
"Hey, Speedy, what's your guess?" Remy asked, throwing his query in the general direction of the van.
"I'mnotsayinganythingbecauseIamcompletelyagainstthis." Was what the wind seemed to say.
"Well, Remy tinks it's Shades, so, majority rules!" He broke the huddle. "De screamer was Shades." Scott's face turned beet red, and didn't notice Bobby fiddling with a small box right by his pant leg. Bobby suddenly straightened, and covered his ears, like he was expecting a bomb to go off. Sam, Ray, Roberto Jamie, and the shop-a-holics took a similar stance.
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!" Scott once again squealed. "IT'S UP MY PANTS! IT'S UP MY PANTS!" The Brotherhood broke their huddle to watch Scott dance around, beating frantically at his pant leg. "IT'S CRAWLING UP MY LEG!! GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF!" Jean tried twice to lift him, dropping him both times. She was laughing too much to concentrate. "IT'S IN MY CROTCH! DEAR GOD! GET IT OUT!" The laughing increased. In the midst of the crazy dance, Scott somehow managed to unzip his fly, and pull the mouse out. Flinging it across the field, he began to run. Bobby saw poor Larry flying through the air.
"Larry! No! Come back!" Jean, also seeing the small furry ball of fuzz flying, focused enough to stop him in mid air long enough for Bobby to grab him and replace him in his little box. They both then returned to laughing.
The Brotherhood, enjoying Scott's very 'manly' dance, returned to their huddle, dragging Wanda in with them.
"So, where are we yo?"
"Canada?"
"More specific Fred. Wanda, do you know?" Wanda just glared. "Okay, won't ask you. Any ideas? Wait." Breaking the huddle momentarily, Lance popped his head up. "How many chances do we get?"
"One"
"As many as necessary." Tabitha and Xavier answered at the same time. Since Xavier overruled Tabby, Xavier's answer stood.
"Ve're going to be here all night!" Kurt moaned. Scott was slowly returning. Rahne and Rogue were still snoozing, both having missed Scott's amazing Mouse-in-my-Pants Dance. Lance returned to the huddle.
"All right, we get as many chances as we need. Any ideas?" They all broke the huddle and began throwing out possibilities.
"We're in Paraguay yo!"
"Kazakhstan?"
"Toronto?" Freddy was closest yet.
"You're along the right track Fred, but still not correct." Everyone suddenly realized one thing, simultaneously. Nobody knew where they were! Xavier was immediately plagued by 21 people mentally asking him where they were. Xavier looked at Hank, who smiled like a Cheshire cat, and then to Logan, who displayed no emotion other than boredom. And perhaps a touch of anger that he'd have to deal with Sabretooth for the rest of the trip. The Brotherhood continued wildly guessing.
"New England?"
"New Hampshire?"
"New Brunswick?"
"Thank you Mr. Dukes. That is where we are currently located. As for the rest of you, I'm suggesting you bone up on provinces, territories and major Canadian cities." Everyone groaned at Hank's words.
"I guessed right?" For the first time in his life, big Freddy was correct about something. "Yeah! Do I get a prize?"
"Yes, I will provide you with both accommodations and meals for the rest of this trip. I can also provide transportation for Wanda or Lance, but I'm afraid you wouldn't fit in any of these vans Fred. And you can't come in until you begin to bathe regularly Todd. I want all of you to understand, that if you come, you are to follow the rules set down for you, and if you disobey them, you will be punished just like the X-Men would. Understood?" Everyone nodded at Xavier's last words. Except Sabretooth. He just growled. "And as for you four," he gestured towards Sabretooth, Remy, John and Piotr, "You will also be subject to the same rules. I can provide transportation for all of you. Now, I believe we should continue on, it is getting late, and there is a town not far from here."
Everyone piled back into the respective vans, except Wanda, who was tired of being sat on, and being downwind of Toad. Wanda joined Storm's van, thinking it would be easiest. She discovered otherwise, and used her abilities to make the shop-a-holics lose their voices. The only noises left were Logan and Evan's arguing, and Storm muttering something under her breath about malls and pipe bombs.
A/N: Enjoy the Mouse-in-my-Pants Dance? Poor, poor Larry. I didn't kill him though! He's still alive! And ready for plenty more Scott torture. My muse tapped me with his tail for this one. They aren't out of the woods yet. There's a reason Rogue and Rahne are talking. My inspiration for that, is my sister, I sleep in the room next to hers, and while she maintains that she talks to herself BEFORE she goes to sleep, everyone knows that she talks before. Will they ever reach a point where they can sleep? In Canada? Who knows! I'm no longer in control of this story. My muse has awakened! And we shall gather in Toronto to bring all holy hell down upon YTV!!