SCENE FIFTEEN- Jack Sparrow Moves Out
(CUT TO: SANDY and JACK SPARROW arguing outside their house.)
Sandy: I'm sick of you.
Jack Sparrow: I'm sick of you too.
Sandy: Why don't you just leave?
Jack Sparrow: Fine. I will. I'll go find somewhere else.
Sandy: And take your stupid kid. (TOMMY goes over to JACK SPARROW. SANDY slaps JACK SPARROW across the face.)
Jack Sparrow: (drunkenly) I think I deserved that one.
Sandy: Get off the premises. Leave! (TOMMY and JACK SPARROW leave.) Buh- bye.
Narrator 2: And so Sandy slapped Jack Sparrow over into a corner. And Jack Sparrow was so drunk on rum he didn't care. (CLOSE UP: MICHELLE in a swing.)
Michelle: You got it, dude!
Sandy: What was that? Oh well. (Goes upstairs to where the CHANGELING BOY is sleeping.) I'm so glad I got the Changeling Boy. I love you. (kisses the CHANGELING BOY's forehead)
Narrator 1: So she kissed him to death. But not to death. Just to bed. He went to bed.
Narrator 2: So did Michelle.
Sandy: (singing the CHANGELING BOY to sleep) Good-night, my someone, good- night, my love. Good-night, my someone, good-night my love.
(CUT TO: SANDY standing in front of her house.)
Sandy: I wish Elle Woods was here. She is my lawyer and all. (pauses, thinks) No she's not! Paris is my lawyer. (ELLE enters.) Why are you here? You're not my lawyer!
Elle: (like Tour-Guide Barbie from Toy Story 2) Hi! I'm Elle Woods!
Sandy: I got that.
Elle: I'm just here to say.
Sandy: Why do you have to wear so much pink?
Elle: (giggles) It's my trademark!
Sandy: You sicken me.
Elle: (indicating SANDY'S pink dress) You're wearing pink too.
(SANDY laughs nervously.)
Elle: I'm just here to say that since the judge hasn't legally decided who ought to legally get the Changeling Boy, he has to legally go into foster care. (pause) Don't I sound smart by using the word 'legally' so much? (SANDY rolls her eyes.)
Sandy: No! He's mine!
Elle: It was decided by the legal system of Massachusetts!
Sandy: We don't live in Massachusetts.
(CUT TO: SANDY and JACK SPARROW arguing outside their house.)
Sandy: I'm sick of you.
Jack Sparrow: I'm sick of you too.
Sandy: Why don't you just leave?
Jack Sparrow: Fine. I will. I'll go find somewhere else.
Sandy: And take your stupid kid. (TOMMY goes over to JACK SPARROW. SANDY slaps JACK SPARROW across the face.)
Jack Sparrow: (drunkenly) I think I deserved that one.
Sandy: Get off the premises. Leave! (TOMMY and JACK SPARROW leave.) Buh- bye.
Narrator 2: And so Sandy slapped Jack Sparrow over into a corner. And Jack Sparrow was so drunk on rum he didn't care. (CLOSE UP: MICHELLE in a swing.)
Michelle: You got it, dude!
Sandy: What was that? Oh well. (Goes upstairs to where the CHANGELING BOY is sleeping.) I'm so glad I got the Changeling Boy. I love you. (kisses the CHANGELING BOY's forehead)
Narrator 1: So she kissed him to death. But not to death. Just to bed. He went to bed.
Narrator 2: So did Michelle.
Sandy: (singing the CHANGELING BOY to sleep) Good-night, my someone, good- night, my love. Good-night, my someone, good-night my love.
(CUT TO: SANDY standing in front of her house.)
Sandy: I wish Elle Woods was here. She is my lawyer and all. (pauses, thinks) No she's not! Paris is my lawyer. (ELLE enters.) Why are you here? You're not my lawyer!
Elle: (like Tour-Guide Barbie from Toy Story 2) Hi! I'm Elle Woods!
Sandy: I got that.
Elle: I'm just here to say.
Sandy: Why do you have to wear so much pink?
Elle: (giggles) It's my trademark!
Sandy: You sicken me.
Elle: (indicating SANDY'S pink dress) You're wearing pink too.
(SANDY laughs nervously.)
Elle: I'm just here to say that since the judge hasn't legally decided who ought to legally get the Changeling Boy, he has to legally go into foster care. (pause) Don't I sound smart by using the word 'legally' so much? (SANDY rolls her eyes.)
Sandy: No! He's mine!
Elle: It was decided by the legal system of Massachusetts!
Sandy: We don't live in Massachusetts.