AN: Hmmm…I just updated, and am typing up a storm again…This could be a good thing…Erratic is mein middle name! I think…somewhere in there…meh, anyway, Newfieland!! Heh, I'm gonna have so much fun with this one, and I have mein cousins to thank, without them, I never would have figured this out…of course, they don't realize they helped me. 8D 111 reviews! Wooo! Shout outs!
psychobunny410- Wow! I'll keep that in mind, and is this soon enough? *big smiley goes here*
Risty- I'm glad you like it! 10 Things I Hate About You? Another Joan Jett song? I'll check into it. Ray torture? You got it! It's so much fun! And Evan is particularly helpful there. I like Evan, so if I start using him too much, whack me.
Millenuim mutant- Northern Reflections isn't? Well, my bad, but the last few times I went down to the States, I didn't pay attention to the stores…I don't like shopping…
D-Ark of Spirit- Wow! Mein style is patented? I doubt it, but danke anyway! Heh, I like that line, expect to appear in a DISCLAIMER near you! Soon…And don't worry about Kurt and Kitty, nothing REALLY bad, and Rogue brandishing a pillow…I like that image too. Feel free to use it! And Logan likes to sleep in, otherwise I wouldn't be able to torture Scott anymore…Logan would have all the fun, and I can't let him! They got Advil, and Placebo (I actually thought that was a real type of medication once! Last week actually _) Yes, John burned the historical relic of a chair. ^_^ Jamie is cute, And it was Kitty/Bobby/Jubes, although I think Amara gets sick when she's on a boat, but I haven't seen Cruise Control yet. Meh. The adults find that that theory is very effective…and yes, Ray torture is fun, I think I have River of Dreams to thank for that. Kurt's gonna send 'em on a wild goose chase, for sure, and cameos of other mutants? Hmmm…
Panther Nesmith- Yes! And I might be using another! But it won't be till the end, so ja. I know! Warren Zevon's dead! I found out when my dad mentioned it last Thursday I believe it was…I mourned him by playing Werewolves of London at full blast…Heh, and I have indeed found a Newfoundland plot bunny, weird thing being, I found it in Nova Scotia O_o RABID will be getting a reference, just gotta decide where…heh, headquarters maybe…
animeluvr1- woah! This'll be a long shout-out! Heh, don't worry about it! New readers are always welcome! Heh, Steve, I know a guy named Steve, he annoys the hell outta me…heh, moving flammable object…with St. John…*spots plot bunny attempting to get away, and give chase* Ray may not seem the type, but I blackmailed him. And yes, it was Scott! Michael J. Fox…hmmm…The fruits and veggies thing is something they actually ask. And hoser! I gotta do that! Ja, I'm sure you did…Captain Sisko is a Star Trek thing, so don't worry if you don't get it, Storm's lost it three ways from yesterday. I did say Sam and Jamie twice! D'oh! Ah well, the Prof thought they didn't hear the first time. Tabby the klepto, holle ja! Canadian beer…as one comedian put it, 'With Canadian beer, the point comes AFTER the god damn seven!' Ja, it's strong. I think he'd be pretty tired after running around all day. Lance and steering wheel are very good friends…Tabby over Kitty, either way you have a feline driving! The water in Canada is generally colder…and Americans think we're freaks cuz we'll go swimming when it's twenty degrees C, and I like the cold, hate the heat, so I'd never survive in Florida. My friends think I'M a freak cuz I run around in shorts and a t-shirt when it's 0 degrees C (32 F) Yes, Kurt's lucky…heh. Monopoly, feel free! I actually got the idea from D-Ark, with his T/P relations…Kitty's a super-genius, but that's why it's so funny! I like Remy, so he gets bashed, Panther's rubbin' off on me…_ Actually, Alex spells it Havok, but that would be weird…O_o Wow, that's a long shout-out, but then you left twelve reviews, almost in a row…
Jassie- Pyro and Gambit are conspiring against the museum…I just know it…^_^ Glad you liked the party! And Gambit's gonna get it…ja! Rahne howling was borrowed from Panther, and Ray torture is just fun (I believe I've mentioned that several times…) You like me being evil? *begins worship* Getting seasick would suck, I suppose, heh, I like rough seas…and I agree! Canada is the best! Wooo! As for Newfie accents…feel free to laugh at mein attempts…
Wow! What a long AN! Can't forget this though!
DISCLAIMER: Some people can snap their fingers, I can't, I snap my toes instead.
"Ummm…Where are we?" Bobby asked, looking at the collection of houses.
"I guess I got us lost…" Kurt said sheepishly. Everyone glared at him.
"Now, this can easily be cleared up, we just have to ask someone from here just where this is, and how we can get to St. John's from here." Hank looked at the large group. "Any volunteers?" A cricket chirped.
"Shut him up!" Sam hissed at Bobby.
"The first one back with directions gets to decide what we do at the stop of their choice." Hank was trampled by twenty-three mutants, all in a mad stampede to get to the group of houses.
Knocking on the door, Bobby, Sam, Kurt and Rahne waited until it opened.
"Whaddya all be wantin' now b'y?" Bobby, Sam, and Kurt were left slightly confused at the speed the woman had rattled the phrase off. Rahne was the first to respond.
"We want the directions t' St. John's."
"Well, noaw, ye are all a bit off course iffen ye were tryin' t'get t' St. John's b'y. St. John's is on th' island, ye be on the mainland right now b'y. Ye look familiar, who be y' ma now b'y?" She looked straight at Bobby.
"Uh…um…my what?"
"Y' ma! Y' mother!"
"Oh! Um…Charlene Drake, why?"
"Drake! Charlene be my sista b'y! Yer my nephew!" Bobby, Sam, Kurt, and Rahne stared. "These y' friends? C'm in! C'm in! I jus' finished bakin' some tea biscuits! C'm in and have some with m'lasses on 'em!" The woman grabbed Bobby and Sam, while Kurt and Rahne followed dumbly.
"Umm…m'lasses?" Bobby looked questioningly at Rahne, who shrugged her shoulders.
"C'm! Meet y' cousins!" The woman dragged them into a smallish kitchen, where there were two kids sitting and eating.
"Margie! Josh! Looky at who jus' showed up at th' door b'y!" The kids stared. "It's yer cousin! An' some friends o' his b'y!"
"Hi…" The boy said, while the girl just watched them.
"'Ave a seat! 'Ere! 'Ave some biscuits! Thar fresh from th' oven! An' here's some fresh m'lasses to put on 'em b'y!" The four mutants looked dubiously at the plate of round and slightly browned items, and then at the carton that looked like a carton of milk set beside them. Sam shrugged, took one of the biscuits, and pulled it apart. Biting into one half of it, his face brightened as he chewed.
"Are they any good?" Kurt whispered.
"Tha' looks awful dry b'y! Try puttin' some m'lasses on it, or we have butter if y' prefer." Sam looked at the carton, and tipped some warm brown semi-liquid onto the uneaten half of his tea biscuit. It started to drip a bit, and Sam put his hand under the biscuit half, and stuffed the whole thing into his mouth. He chewed, and gestured for the other three to have one.
"Th'r not poisoned if that's what're y' all 'fraid of." Josh said, as he reached for one. Bobby's aunt slapped his hand away.
"Let them all 'av a biscuit now! Ye've already had three b'y!" Kurt, Rahne, and Bobby all reached for the plate.
"Are you sure?" Scott looked Lance in the eye.
"Yeah, I'm sure! They were standing on the step, and then the lady dragged them all in and closed the door!" Lance shot back, angry that Scott was questioning him.
"Well, they may need our help! Which house?"
Bobby, Rahne, Kurt, Sam, Josh and Margie were sitting, laughing, and eating tea biscuits. Josh and Margie had introduced the mutants to the wonders of Cheese Whiz, and margarine as tea biscuit toppings. Kurt, being Kurt, had poured all three over the biggest biscuit he could find, and then added some sugar, and oatmeal. Bobby's newfound cousins, being unused to Kurt's eating habits, watched in amazement as he downed his concoction, and proceeded to create another, while eating two other tea biscuits on the side.
"So you're actually older'n me?" Bobby asked Josh, for the third time.
"Aye, but not by much b'y, y' said y' was 14, and I jus' turned 15 las' week." Josh replied, unable to tear his eyes off Kurt.
"Aye, Josh 'ere jus' turned int' a teenybopper."
"Danke for the food Mrs…ummm, vhat's your name?" Kurt asked, suddenly confused.
"Mrs. Gena Gillis." Kurt opened his mouth, but was distracted by a sudden noise reaching his ears.
"All right! Let our friends go now!" The seven people in the kitchen turned to stare at Scott, who had switched his shades for his visor, and the rest of the X-men, plus Brotherhood, plus Acolytes, all charged, and ready for a fight, and all crammed into the hallway that lead from the door to the kitchen. The cricket began chirping again.
"Let y' friends go naow b'y? Who be 'oldin' 'em?" Mrs. Gillis looked slightly confused.
"Uhhh…you are, aren't you?" Evan asked, beginning to retract some of his spikes.
"Nay, 'm feedin' 'em. D'ye wan' any tea biscuits?" The young mutants all looked dubiously at the proffered plate. Logan snorted, walked forward, and speared three.
"Got any beans and milk?"
"So these are all your relations?" Jean asked, looking at Bobby askance.
"Well, not all, but about four families here are my blood relatives, and just about everyone else is a family friend." Bobby shrugged.
"Aye, that's right b'y, 'll have t' take y' t' meet the rest of y' fam'ly."
"That's very nice Mrs…Mrs…"
"Gillis"
"Mrs. Gillis, but our destination was St. John's, and your town doesn't seem to have any form of lodging, so we really should be on our way."
"Nonsense! Look 'round will y'? A'twixt us all, we can scare up some beds f' y' all t' sleep in!" Hank opened his mouth to argue, and Mrs. Gillis raised her hand, cutting him off. "Y' all stay 'ere b'y, and th's final!"
"But Mrs. Gillis! There's hardly enough room to lodge our entir-"
"Y're stayin'!"
"But-"
"It's final!"
"B-"
"Understand?" Mrs. Gillis brandished her spatula as if it were a deadly weapon, and could take down the furry blue gorilla in front of her.
"Yes ma'am." Hank squeaked. Even if he was a furry blue gorilla, a hot spatula to rear end is not very pleasant.
"So if y' don' mind, I set up some o' the foamies for y', and y' can sleep here! There's some blankets if y' get cold b'y." Mrs. Gillis sat Fred down on the pile of foam mattresses. "Now, y' two can sleep on the fold-out if that's okay, an' one o' y' can bunk with Margie, and that leaves y' two." Rahne raised her hand timidly.
"If it's okay ma'am, I can sleep on the edge of any bed…"
"Are y' sure? I wan' y' all t' be comfortable…"
"It's perfectly okay Mrs. Gillis! I'll just curl up and they'll ne'er notice me!"
"All right, then y' three c'n go down an' sleep on the fold-out b'y, Ned's just settin' it up now, so y' take these blankets, an' make sure y' warm' nuff now b'y!" Mrs. Gillis sent Rahne, Amara, and Jubilee down, with more blankets than the Institute had.
"That just leaves y' naow…" Mrs. Gillis scanned the room. Kurt was hanging off the coat hooks, with a half dozen blankets, Wanda had been given the 'chesterfield', with two sheets, four pillows, and seven blankets. Fred was on the floor, along with Ray, Jamie, and Remy. Rogue was the only one without a place to sleep at the moment.
"Well, I guess y' c'n have th' ol' La-Z-Boy chair, b'y." Rogue followed the lady to a small corner, where a large comfy chair was. "Naow y' take these pillows and blankets, an' iffen y' get cold, don' worry, thar's more blankets in th' cupboard, jus' go get them." Rogue sat down in the chair, and after a moment of fiddling, pulled the lever, sending the footrest shooting out, and Rogue flying backwards.
"Yes, I f'got b'out that, tha' chair is a tad temperamental b'y, be careful with it naow! Y' all have a good night sleep! G'night!" Mrs. Gillis turned off the lights, and left the room. In the darkness, there was the sound of a crash, and the chair Rogue was in shifted position again, pushing the seat back up a bit, so Rogue was in a semi-reclining position.
Kurt lifted a fuzzy hand to rub the sleep out of his eye. He opened them, and fell off his coat hook.
"HI! IT'S ME!! STEVEN!!" The tiny midget jumped onto Kurt.
"Who the hell is up at this hour?" Ray demanded. Rogue glared from where her head was hanging off the edge of the footrest. Wanda glared from the 'chesterfield', while Remy and Fred mumbled to themselves. "WAKE UP!! IT'S MORNING!!" The kid shouted, as he jumped up and down on Kurt. Kurt ported away, landing on Fred, and nursing some crushed ribs.
"Go back to sleep kid! It's too damn early!" Ray growled, and then rolled over.
"WHY DO YOU HAVE LIPSTICK ON YOUR FACE?" The midget asked, as he began to jump on Ray.
"WHAT?" Ray leaped up, and ran to the bathroom, to find a line-up. John, Bobby, Margie, and Jean were all in line.
"They only have one bathroom." Jean made a face.
"Josh's in there, and you're all gonna have t' wait a long time! He likes t' read books in there b'y." Margie piped up. Ray groaned.
"Do I have lipstick on my face?" he asked Jean.
"No, but I think your stings are infected…"
"Arrrgh!!" Ray scratched wildly at his welts.
"Jellies?" Margie asked, Bobby nodded. "We have some stuff for 'em b'y."
"Where? Where? I'll pay you! Just let me have it!" Ray grabbed Margie.
'It's in the bath b'y."
"Who's doing all that yelling?"
"Ah think his name was Steve…" Rogue glared at the midget. He was chasing two Jamie clones.
"He doesn't live here, does he?" Kurt watched Steven run circles around the Jamies.
"Nah, he's my youngest nephew b'y." The group turned to see Mrs. Gillis walking into the room, just tying up her housecoat. "Steven, leave 'em alone, th'r 'Mericans b'y. Go back 'ome, wake y' da and y' ma." Steven nodded, and rushed out.
"He reminds me of Pietro…" Fred said, while Steve rushed out, out, and away.
"Did 'e wake y'?" Mrs. Gillis asked, as she walked into the kitchen.
It wasn't long before the smells of bacon and pancakes were wafting through the house, finally bringing Josh out of the bathroom. He was greeted by a mob, which couldn't decide whether to toss his head to Rahne, or rush the single bathroom.
It was well after noon by the time every one was ready to leave. And Mrs. Gillis would not allow it.
"Y' jus' got here! Stay awhile b'y! Meet all y' cousins! Th'y all want t' meet y'!"
Bobby shook his head, no.
"Of course we'll stay! I'm sure Bobby's eager to meet the rest of his cousins!" Bobby's head shot up, and glared at the Professor.
"This for trying to prove that Halifax harbor could freeze, isn't it?" Bobby asked. Hank nodded.
"C'mon!!" Margie grabbed Jamie and Rahne, while Josh latched onto Bobby and Scott.
"We'll show y' 'round b'y!" The remaining X-Men shrugged, and followed. Josh and Margie led them past the row of houses, and several people waved. By the time the reached 'town', five more kids were following. They had introduced themselves as more of Bobby's cousins. Joe, Kris, Caitlin, Theresa, and Mike, all five were younger then Josh, but older than Margie, who was eleven.
"That's Murph's store, he's pretty nice, if y' go in, and are short change, he'll still give y' y' ice cream b'y, but if he catches y' stealin', y' get banned. C'mon! Y're all slower'n cold molasses runnin' uphill!" Josh and Co. darted into the small store, and the majority of the newbies followed. Kurt, Kitty, Evan, Rogue, Acolytes, and Brotherhood shrugged, and stepped inside. Scott sighed, and followed Jean in, to 'keep and eye' on Remy.
The store was a small one, and the entire group was all huddled in one corner. In the center, was the small ice cream freezer. Josh and Kris were in the center, passing requested ice cream to the mutant who wanted it. Remy however, was off to the side, examining the playing cards and darts. Scott watched as he slipped two sets of darts into his pocket, followed by five card decks. Scott scanned the store for 'Murph', and spotting the lone adult, he walked over, and whispered some stuff in his ear. Murph stared at Scott.
"WHAT KIND O' FRIEND BE YE? SNITCHIN' ON Y' MATE B'Y! I NE'ER HEARD O' TH' LIKE! GET OUTTA M' STORE NOW BOY OR SO 'ELP ME B'Y!!" He thundered, Scott felt like shrinking at every word, and when Murph finished, he scuttled out of the store as fast as he could. Josh shrugged, and returned to fishing out various ice creams, drumsticks, and freezies. Remy walked to the front of the store, and emptied his pockets.
"'Lo! Remy'd like t' buy dese here items."
"Were y' really plannin' on stealin' 'em?"
"Non, if Remy had been, 'e woulda made 'is escape while de others were buyin' dere stuff." He shrugged, and handed over the appropriate amount of Canadian money. Walking out of the store, he spotted Scott, his face as red as his shades.
"Why me? Why why why?" He asked, speaking to no one in particular. It wasn't long before the other mutants exited, sucking on ice cream and freezies.
"Any of y' catch hoppers b'y?" Mike asked.
"Hoppers?" Kurt asked, looking at the Newfies quizzically.
"Grasshoppers, crickets, y'know, hoppers."
"I have a grasshopper…" Kurt said, looking in his pocket.
"I got the cricket!" Bobby replied, angrily.
"You have Billy, I've got Mary!" Kurt shot back, removing the box labeled Mary.
"Wanna catch some more? I have a pop bottle in the garage…" Caitlin ran off to retrieve said bottle. Returning, the group followed Bobby's cousins to a large field. The Canadians started to search the field. Margie, Theresa, and Mike on their hands and knees, everyone else swiping their foot over the grass. Something hopped out from under Caitlin's foot, and she pounced on the small insect. Cupping her hands over it, she noticed something long green and slimy was also under her hands.
"Lahgo mah hongue!" Todd shouted best he could, Caitlin lifted her hands, tongue and cricket shot out and whacked Todd in the face. Theresa and Margie giggled.
"Aghh! He crapped on me!" Josh shouted. "Open the bottle!" Jamie hurriedly unscrewed the cap, and Josh dumped the cricket.
It wasn't long before the mutants and Bobby's cousins had caught nearly a hundred crickets. They were all lying in the grass, discussing the differences between Canada and the U.S. Alright, I lied, they were arguing over which was better.
"America may have hot places, but th' nigh on killed everythin' with th'r roads and buildin's and crap!"
"Canada's so freakin' cold though! I mean, jeez! It's 60 degrees!"
"Tha's another thing! Canada's metric! Like th' rest of the world! It's fifteen degrees!"
The argument continued in this manner, until Josh poked Evan in the eye. Then it became all out war. Rahne, Kurt, Roberto, Amara, Pyro, and Piotr sat on the sidelines, none of them being American.
"Oooh! I tink dat dat has to hurt…" Remy winced, and when the other guys saw what he was talking about, they too cringed. Amara ducked as a flying Jamie clone went over her head.
"The crickets!! The crickets!!" John chased after the pop bottle, which had bounced off Lance's head, and caught it in a running dive. "They're safe!!" He shouted, after spitting out the mouthful of grass. Rogue came flying out of the melee, using Sam's power, and bristling with spikes. Getting up to shake her head, she flew right back into the fight.
The six watched, and sat down, deciding it was gonna be a while.
"Wha' happened t' y' all?!? It looks like y' were hit by three fright coal trains b'y!" Mrs. Gillis stared at the two dozen or so black eyes, three missing teeth, four sprained limbs, grass stains galore, and cuts and bruises everywhere.
"We won ma!" Margie said proudly, best she could around a split lip and swollen jaw.
"Won what? Good Lord! What happened to you all?" Xavier stared at his charges, almost all of which were injured worse than after three sessions with Logan.
"The fight over whose national pride makes 'em do stupider things." Kurt said, as he helped himself to the plate a fresh cookies.
"Did you learn anything today?" Hank asked, trying to be stern.
"We learned 'Mericans all hit like wussies b'y." Mrs. Gillis whacked Caitlin over the head with her spatula.
"I think y' broke my nose, but we bet 'em!" Joe was the next target for the spatula. The mutants looked from one to another, and shrugged.
"I guess we learned that Logan's not the only Canadian that doesn't like to fight fair. The Newfies, plus Mrs. Gillis turned and looked at Ray. "Ummm…" Logan stepped in the room, with a SNIKT! "Bye!" Ray squeaked, before turning tail to run like hell, before the Canadians got him. The other mutants sat down and ate all the cookies.
"Soo…" After the interesting chase, Ray now had dozens more bruises, they had eaten supper (beans, tea biscuits, and milk) and boredom had set in.
"Any bars 'round here?" Bobby asked suddenly.
"Yea, but th' all know us, and tha' we'r minors, s'no use." Josh leaned back, stretched and cracked his knuckles.
"They don't know us though yo!" Todd said, the mutants all brightened up.
"Yea, th' do b'y, small town, news travels fast, specially when y' got a ma wi' verbal diarrhea."
"Verbal" *sknif* "diarrhea?" *munf* Evan was trying his very best not to laugh, as was everyone else.
"Wanna roast some marshmallows b'y?" Mike asked suddenly. John perked up.
"Fire?" He asked innocently.
"I'll get the marshmallows!" Margie hopped off the floor, and rushed into the kitchen, where there was a congregation of adults.
"Outside!" Josh shouted, pointing to the door. The group rushed out, and the Newfies began to clear an area for a fire pit. It didn't take long.
"Grab some sticks!" Theresa began scrounging the ground for long straight sticks.
"Get the gasoline!!" Mike shouted, running off into the garage, returning with a large can of fuel. Pyro flipped open his lighter, and the flame moved from the lighter to the gasoline soaked ground and firewood.
FWOOMP!!
The fire cackled happily, as Pyro sat back down, slightly singed would be an understatement. Theresa and Margie giggled happily as the stuck marshmallows on their sticks, and thrust them in the fire. Josh did the same, and removed the burning lump of sugar out a moment later. He started to wave the stick around, attempting to put out the fire. Instead, he flung the marshmallow halfway across the field.
Fwoomp!
The mutants watched as half the field went up in flames. Pyro giggled maniacally.
"Fire…fire…burn…" He began to chant.
"Put it out genius!" Josh whacked Pyro on the back of his head.
"Spoil all my fun…" He grumbled, but put it out, rather reluctantly.
"Anyone want my marshmallow b'y?" Margie asked, holding a charred and blackened mass.
After another night, and another early morning wake-up call, courtesy of Steven, the mutants were ready to leave, Bobby especially, making special vows never to return to Canada after this trip. The Acolytes took the lead for this round.
"Poke." Piotr said, poking John.
"Poke poke." John poked Piotr and then Sabretooth. Sabretooth growled. "Sorry! Poke." John poked Pietro.
"Pokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepokepoke!" Pietro poked everyone in the van, excluding Sabretooth, half a dozen times. St. John became annoyed.
"Pokety poke pokem!" He said, poking Pietro. Pietro poked back, and before long, the two were very involved in a poke war, which hit it's peak when John pulled out his lighter, and tried to hit Pietro with a fireball. Needless to say, he missed, and instead set fire to the van.
"EVERYONE BAIL!!" Remy shouted as he hit the brakes and dove out the drivers door. The Acolytes leaped out of the van, just as the fire hit the fuel tank.
"Ooooh!! Fire!!" St. John began to toy with said fire. The remaining four vehicles screeched to a stop behind the flaming wreckage of the Acolytes'.
"What happened? Is everyone okay?" Hank asked, exiting his van, closely followed by the entire student population. Including Wanda.
"John was poking me and I poked him back and he blew up th-WANDA!! NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO!!"
"PIETRO!!!" Wanda threw the giant flaming fireball at the speed demon, missing, and hitting metal Colossus instead.
"Ugh, I did nothing to you, vhy do you attempt to injure me?" He asked, lifting the burning car and tossing it to the side of the road. Wanda ignored him, her one goal at the moment, to kill Pietro.
AN: Heh heh, did you likey? Bobby's cousins are basically my cousins, with a few alterations, including their names. Yes, even Steven…I swear, if that midget wakes me up one more time at 5 30 am, I'm gonna strangle him…yes…anyway, next up is Quebec, and some damage control for this rivalry of Pietro and Wanda's…Ahhh…Sibling rivalry…and btw, I've FINALLY SEEN X2!!! WOOO! I actually saw it about three weeks ago, but ja, the had Beast! And Colossus! And Remy's name! And Jamie's name! And more cameos than a can of beans! AND THEY KILLED JEAN!! But they made Rogue kiss Bobby! Erkness…anyway, till next update! And sorry for the shortness, but I want to get this up.