Chapter 13: Dreams of Reunion

Fujin's POV

Voices were murmuring around me, and people were walking back and forth in the hall outside my room. I didn't know who they were or what they were doing here. There was a low, deep and flirtatious voice that I didn't recognise, but the other I had known since birth. That angry, but feminine voice that was unmistakable to my ears belonged to my mother.

I tried to block out their conversation as I turned over in my bed. As their words continually flowed into my head, I could feel myself begin to tremble and tears form in my eyes. I didn't want to hear the cruel and unfaithful words the spoke of. I wanted to wake up from my living nightmare and shut out all the pain that had haunted me for the past nights.

I wanted to see my father again. For so long, he had been shunned from our house by my mother. I could remember their argument and painful words as vividly as yesterday. I could remember my mother repeatedly hitting my father again and again, shouting words that I didn't understand.

But my father hadn't done anything wrong. He was trying his best to keep us together…and make us a family…But my mother had been drinking again that night. Numerous bottles lay empty around the house and she had begun to smell of alcohol perpetually. Nearly every night since then, she had managed to bring home a different stranger, and each night she fulfilled her lustful desires.

She would throw me into my room early in the afternoon and lock it while she went out, not wanting me to intrude on her disgusting acts. But it wasn't because she was ashamed of herself. It was quite the opposite. Too many times I had seen my parents fight, and too many times I had been beaten for watching. She didn't care about the pressures that lay on my shoulders from seeing such pain. As far as I knew, it would be better if I didn't exist…

So I tired to rid myself of this world…more than once…but I couldn't bring myself to cause me any harm. I had to keep living, even if it only was for my father. Amongst the bruises and scars lay something that my father treasured with his life. After every punishment my mother had inflicted on me, my father would come and heal my pain and tend to my wounds…

Suddenly a knock at my window rattled quietly through my room. My eyes sprang open at the sudden noise, and I looked around for the creature that caused the noise. I sat up in my moonlit room and my eyes lit up as they saw who was there. I ran at once to my window and let in the only person who cared and looked after me.

"Fujin…" he whispered holding his arms out.

"Papa…" I walked into his embrace and let out my built up sorrows.

"Fujin…don't cry. Don't worry sweetie…I know." I drew back and looked at him as he said those last two words.

"You do?" He nodded.

"Don't go…don't go again." I cried into his chest once more.

"I won't go. I'm not going anywhere."

I didn't say anything from then on. All I wanted was to be with my father. I knew that while I was with him, I was safe and nothing could happen to me. But by this time, my eyes were slowly giving into sleep, and my eyelids became heavy. My body was becoming limp with sleep and I could vaguely feel my father lift me into his arms and begin to carry me towards my bed.

The voices outside were becoming quieter, but the noises from outside in the hall were getting louder. Muffled noises and breathes of air were all I could hear, but the two adults outside were falling to the floor and rolling on the creaky wood of the floor.

"Don't…open your eyes Fujin." My father said.

I obeyed wondering what he meant, but something in his voice wasn't convincing enough. He lay me down on my bed, but his warmth was still with there. I cracked open my eyes to look at my father lying next to me.

"Please Fujin…don't open your eyes," he pulled my closer to him, burying my head into his body. "Don't hear anything, don't see anything. Please Fujin…"

"Ok…" I shut my eyes again and tried to go to sleep. As I drifted off into subconsciousness I heard a faint mumble from my father. He was crying…

"Where did I go wrong?" he whispered.

***

"Fujin…Come on Fujin, wake up!"

I groaned as I was gradually brought back into reality by the touch of cold hands. I opened my eye to see Seifer looking over me, his hand clutching mine.

"Fujin!" he said sighing my name. I smiled weakly at him as he freed my trembling fingers from his grasp.

"Yeah. I'm fine." I said sitting up in Seifer's room again. As I rose, the weight of the air seemed to change to that of water and I felt like I was surfacing from underneath the sea. My hands flew up immediately to support my drooping head and I rubbed my forehead with my shaking hands. But as my hand trailed down to my cheeks I felt a river of wet moisture running down my skin. My fingers travelled back up to my red eye and again felt the wet tears that resided there.

"What…" I began to say, but words failed to come to my mouth. The air felt thick around my face and the question dissolved away into nothing. I turned my heavy head toward my vacant friend looking for answers, but his features were like a wall of ice, only showing my disfigured reflection when I looked at him, not giving me any answers except the horror of myself.

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Seifer's POV

I wanted to say something. I really did. I wanted to provide her with words to soothe her, but everything clogged in one big mass in the back of my throat. Her eyes were sending out their distress signals, and her falling tears cried out to me to help her, but I was frozen by the fear that had rooted me to her side while she slept. Her mumbled, frightened, unconscious words of sleep had shaken my very knowledge of fear.

'Mama doesn't want me here, so Fujin will go away…Fujin will go away forever so mama will be happy. Fujin will die and mama will be happy…'

"Fujin…" All I could say was her name…If I spoke any further, I felt that I would be the one crying.

"Why?" her voice was barely a whisper. I reached for her hand again, as actions were the only thing possible for me. Her skin was icy to touch, but she didn't flinch away.

'Fujin will die…'

"You're not going to go away. I won't let you," I blurted out as her words ran through my mind once again. "I won't let you go…"

"Seifer…"

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Fujin's POV

How did he know? His rushed words almost echoed my dream. But as I looked as him, I felt a small flame of hope rekindle inside my heart.

"It's ok…I won't go…" 'Not while you're here by my side' I added in mental thought. He looked back up at me at that point, and saw me smiling faintly. "I'll be ok…"

"But…your dream…" As he said this, I felt a wave of anxiety drown the fire inside of me. He couldn't know…it was my dream…how could he have known what was…

"I'm ok…" I said rising up from the sea of thoughts. But as soon as the sentence finished, another rolling wave crashed down on me, drowning me in thoughts and unanswerable questions. I felt that if I stayed here any longer, then I would be lost forever in my boundless sea of mental solicitude.

"I'd better go…" I said making an effort to get out of bed.

"Are you sure you're ok?" I didn't reply and only walked on towards the door. The floor felt so hard compared to the soft bed. I looked down to the floor but my vision swung around in front of my eye, forcing me into a trance like state.

This can't be happening again…

I slowly turned round to face Seifer, ready to laugh that this same thing was happening all over again.

"Here we go again…" was the last thing I said before my world collapsed and I fell to the floor.