Chapter 18: Reformation

Fujin's POV

I was too terrified to sleep many nights afterwards. I lay awake on my bed every night, staring into space trying not to let my heavy eye close. Again and again I got up and moved around when I felt like I might fall asleep.

'This isn't working.' I thought four days later. 'I need to take my mind off sleep.' I decided to go and take a walk around the castle. I pulled on my boots and jacket and stepped out of my room. My footsteps echoed down the empty corridor as I walked to an unknown destination. Without knowing it, I found myself out on the balcony once again.

'Why do my feet always take me here?' I wondered while smiling inwardly. I looked out to the black night sky, but my eye was still threatening to fall shut. I slid down on the floor, wincing at the pain in my side, and my head slumped forward.

'I'm not going to fall asleep. I'm not going to fall asleep!' I chanted to myself in my head. But the time came when I eventually couldn't hold out any longer. My eye shut and I instantly fell into unconsciousness.

---

Once again it was Tema. By now I knew this dream by heart, and my wounds were getting steadily worse. I could barely stand without shaking, and my strength had diminished with every dream. Every time I cried out to the lady standing by watching, but each time she didn't hear me. The T-Rexator swung its huge face into my body, winding me again, and I fell towards Tema's feet.

I was sick and tired of this. Out of rage I swung my fist at his shin, knowing he'd catch it. I would kick him, knowing I wouldn't touch him. But then it hit me. I was in control of my body. Not anybody else. I smirked at him as he spoke to me, and I unleashed an Aero straight into his face. He fell back stunned, dropping my pinwheel. I scrambled towards it and grabbed it before he could even get up. I stood over him triumphant. It was my turn to kick him, punch him and make his life hell.

But my mind quickly turned back to the lumbering T-Rexator. I let my pinwheel fly from my hand, and it struck the T-Rexator down. I turned my head back to Tema's figure that lay on the floor, clutching his stomach. I heard my pinwheel rip through the air returning to me, and I held my hand out and caught it without even looking. I walked back over to him and kicked him again. I began to summon my guardian force, to truly pay him back for all the pain and hurt he had dealt me.

I saw the sorceress shift uncomfortably in the corner of my eye, but I paid it no mind. I stepped closer and closer to my prey and finally I felt myself disappear. Pandemona fell from the skies and thundered down to the ground. But as I looked on, the sorceress ran towards Tema, but as I looked again, I saw it wasn't Tema, but Seifer.

'No! Pandemona stop!' I tried to yell out, but my words failed me. All my thoughts and feelings of victory had vanished, and had been quickly replaced by fear and anguish.

"How could you kill your own friend!?" Edea screamed at me as they were both sucked into Pandemona's mouth. I cried out for Pandemona to stop. Tears fell from my eye and my whole body shook. I couldn't bear to face the outcome, so I screwed my eye tightly shut and fell to the floor, my body heaving in sobs.

" - jin…Fujin…" I could hear someone call out my name, but I didn't want to hear them. They shouted again, but they sounded so far away.

'Seifer…I'm so sorry.' I thought as I fell unconscious.

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Seifer's POV

"Fujin! Fujin! Come on, wake up!" I pleaded. I had found her this morning out here chilled to a bone, crying her heart out. "Fujin! Wake up Fujin!" I shouted while shaking her small body in my hands. It pained me to see her so helpless when I could do nothing to help her.

But hope still reigned as I saw her eye flutter open, tears still running down her cheek. She looked at me, her mouth slightly open, trying to say something.

"What is it - " but before I could finish she threw herself at me into my arms and buried her head in my chest. She was mumbling so many words at once, I couldn't understand a thing she was saying, but I had a feeling of who I was going to see after Fujin had calmed down.

"Fujin…" I said reassuringly as I pulled her up to stand. Her cold, shivering body never broke contact with mine, and I held her weak form to me with all my might. She leaned into me with no strength at all, sapping my warmth to heat herself. I sighed and knocked the back of her knees so I could pick her fragile body up. She continued to sob into my chest, murmuring numerous sentences all at once as I carried her back to the warmth of her room.

I laid her down on the bed and quickly pulled up the covers to desperately irradiate the frightening chill the surrounded her.

"Don't go…" I heard her whisper. I looked at her, feeling so helpless as I saw her tear stricken, fearful face. Her whole expression rooted me to the ground, and determined me to not leave her side. I held her shaking hand and stroked her pale face with my finger. I hushed her quivering mouth, and assured her that I wouldn't be going anywhere.

"Fujin…Please…tell me what's wrong," For a moment she said nothing. "When you're ready." I added.

"I…I killed you." She whispered to me, turning her head to look straight into my shocked eyes. "I thought you…were Tema," she choked out. "But…but then you were there…and…" I silenced her by putting a finger to her mouth. I smiled and cupped her shivering face.

"But I'm here now aren't I? I'm not dead and you didn't kill me…It was only a dream…" I said. "See? I'm still here." I said leaning forwards to push away a strand of silver hair from her eye.

"But…is this a dream?" she said angrily as she flung back the covers to reveal her blood stained clothes. I looked at her face and then to her side, finding no words to comfort her. "Every night, it happens again," she said a little more quietly as she pulled the covers back up to her chin. "Every night I wake up dripping in blood!" Fujin's tears gathered at her red eye once more, but she refused them to fall.

I sighed. "It's ok to cry Fujin," I said wiping her tears away with my finger. "Cry when you need to…and I'll be right here."

"Thank you…" I took her hand once more and squeezed it tight.

"Rest now…"

"But…I can't…You - " I silenced her again, but she batted my finger away. "Stop it." She said glaring at me through her tears.

"I'm sorry…But Fuu, you must get some rest. Trust me, please!" I paused looking directly at her. "Please Fujin, you look as tired as hell! Sleep. I promise you won't have any more bad dreams. Please." Without saying a word, she shut her eye and the tears stopped.

I continued to sit there holding her hand, thinking about what to do next. I knew that Fujin would want me to stay here, but I had some business to take care of that couldn't wait. I got up to leave, but was stopped by her hand, tightly clasped around mine. I walked back to her and gazed at her sleeping face. She looked so peaceful, and I suddenly felt an urge to move closer to her. The very site of her compelled me to want to touch her soft, delicate skin again.

I leaned closer to her face, but suddenly drew back as I heard her whisper something.

"Seifer…don't go…please…don't go…" I winced, knowing that I'd have to leave her, but I knew it was for her own good. I leaned forwards again, and gently kissed her forehead, hoping not to wake her. She stirred slightly but remained asleep.

This time I got up and walked towards the door, with one final look over my shoulder at the sleeping beauty just metres away from me. I sighed and quietly shut the door as I strode off quickly to see Edea.

---

"Edea!" I raged as the double doors banged hard against the wall. I saw her there, bent over her crystal, smiling gleefully.

"Why Seifer…what ever is the matter?" she said, keeping her obvious look of exultation.

"What in Hyne's name are you doing to Fujin!?"

"Why nothing…Seifer, you don't need those two imbeciles. They are what's dragging you down, stopping you from achieving the greatness you deserve." She said persuasively.

"They're my friends. You can't just discard them like that. Because of you, Fujin is going crazy!"

"Hmph. You care too much for that girl. You're too good for her. Petty girls are for childish boys. You are not a boy any more Seifer. That's why you're here is it not. You came with me in Timber to become a man. Not remain a boy who cant' forget about a girl!" she said raising her voice.

"I can't leave them behind. I'm a man who knows who my friends are!"

"Seifer, Seifer, Seifer. Can't you see?" she said coming closer so she didn't have to shout. "Your 'friends' are helping you to fail your dream of greatness. If you come with me, I'll make you great. But I can't take them as well. They are in the way. You don't need them. I've been watching you, you know. Every time you see that girl, your eyes go soft like a boy. Your feelings go soft, your attitude and character vanishes before my very eyes. You turn into a boy again, the same boy before you came with me."

"But…every night you tell me this…Every night in my dreams, you tell me this, hurt my friends and take me with you." I paused for a moment, preparing what I was going to say next. I saw her open her mouth to retort, but the words flew out of my mouth before I could stop them "Fujin needs me and I need to take care of her!"

Edea looked a little taken aback, but she smirked and regained her authority. "Well…You really are pathetic aren't you?"

'I can't believe I just said that.' I thought.

"I guess I thought wrong. You have no potential to be great. You have nothing except your little girl friend and a Garden full of fumbling students. You are worthless and insignificant." She paused.

'I didn't just say that…'

"But," I looked up at her. "That doesn't necessarily have to be the case. You don't have to be aware of what you do for me to achieve my goals." I stared at her in silence, knowing what she meant. She was going to take control of my mind…

"You won't hurt Fu - " but my mouth stopped mid sentence. I found I couldn't move any part of my body. My mind wasn't it's own anymore. Everything I did was what Edea told me to do.

"Won't I?" she chuckled. But that chuckle grew louder into a laugh, an evil laugh that rang through the room. And I couldn't do anything but listen, her mind slave who was rooted to the floor, who had no power over anything I did. The only thing I could do was think, but even that wasn't private. She knew everything that I thought and control every moment I made.

'Fujin…I'm sorry.'