Chapter four: A veela in my chambers.
The next opportunity Severus had of being with her presented itself not too long after that afternoon in the dungeons. It was long after curfew and he had been patrolling the hallways, praying Merlin to send him a student he could torture and deduct house points from. As he paced the Slytherin domains, he was startled to find a vaporous figure, dressed entirely in white, standing in front of one of the windows.
There was no moon that night and the only light came from the tip of his wand. At that lack of lighting, the figure resembled a ghost. Thinking his imagination was playing tricks on him, he went closer to it and found it was a woman in a long nightgown that contrasted sharply against the dark color of her hair and created an aura of light around her. Now it looked like a veela... a brunette veela.
The fantastic creature turned and assumed the shape of on of his students.
" Miss Gardner?" He asked, completely startled.
" Oh, Professor… I was… I just… I couldn't sleep," she said, looking down, obviously preparing herself for the lecture that was about to come.
" That's no reason for wandering in the corridors," he stated, staring at her, still unable to believe how innocent and troubled she looked. The last was confirmed by her following words.
" I know, I'm sorry. I needed fresh air because of the nightmares."
" Nightmares?"
" Yes… I've tried everything but I can't get rid of them." Snape felt a wave of protectiveness wash over him, but he immediately suppressed it.
" Have you had them for too long?" He asked, almost sounding concerned.
" Since the first day I came to Hogwarts," whispered Kyra.
Severus was unreservedly taken aback by that. " But that was 6 years ago!" He exclaimed.
" I know… I would have them once a month or so. I didn't pay much attention to them anyway. But I've had one every single night since I returned after the holidays."
" Are you telling me you haven't had a decent night of sleep in two weeks?" There was disbelief in his voice.
" It's not that big of a deal, Professor, really," she said, trying to smile.
" Follow me," he commanded.
" Where are we going?"
" To my chambers," he informed her and started walking.
Kyra almost fainted at that. Maybe she was hallucinating. Yes, that had to be it… Snape couldn't have invited her to his room.
" Follow me, Miss Gardner," he insisted, after seeing she seemed to had been rooted to the spot and couldn't move.
' Well, apparently he did,' thought Kyra as she finally gathered the strength to follow her Head of the House. He walked with long strides and she almost had to run to keep up with him. After a while, she didn't even bother to try.
Snape stopped sensing her presence behind him and turned to see were she was. Angered to find her very delayed, he almost floated until he had her by his side once again.
" Is the lack of sleep affecting your walking speed, Miss Gardner?" He mocked.
" Oh, I like to walk slowly when the corridors are empty, it's a good chance to enjoy the castle. This place is magnificent, don't you think?"
" Indeed. But I have been here for such a long time I no longer pay attention to it," he confessed.
" Well, 6 years is also a pretty long time and I can still admire the castle's beauty," she remarked. A growl was all the answer she got from him. " OK, OK, Let's go, Professor Snape."
Nodding, he started leading the way once again. The lower they descended in the castle, the colder it got. Also, Kyra had a sense of foreboding, as if she was doing something forbidden that made her instinctively get closer to his figure. Severus didn't complain and they walked the rest of the way very near each other.
" Here we are," he announced, flickering his wand in front of an impressive oak door that stood tall and proud in the stone.
That caused the door to open and Kyra was startled to find a well-furnished receiving room in black and silver. There were several beautiful black chairs accompanied by a small ebony table. The walls were lined with books, the remaining wall space adorned with several paintings of different forest and ocean sceneries bathed by the moonlight; some of the many candles were lit, dripping white wax onto elegant silver candlesticks.
" Come on in, Miss Gardner," he called from inside. " Or you prefer to watch from the door?"
Smiling, Kyra stepped cautiously inside, surprised when her feet sunk into a plush, dark blue carpet. Directly in front of her was a fire; facing it was a black leather couch with two plush black armchairs arranged at its sides. She also noticed a mahogany desk inlaid with what appeared to be cherry wood standing against the wall at a ninety-degree angle to the couch. Behind the desk emerged a splendid chair, one of the tallest she had ever seen.
Kyra tried to imagine him sitting there, grading papers, but was almost immediately distracted by a light coming from an open door to her left. His bedroom. With a quick glance, she noticed that the stonewalls were decorated sparingly with magnificent tapestries. There was also a fire and another black armchair arranged in front of it. Off to the right, a large canopied bed decorated with dark blue and silver velvet hangings stood, mahogany nightstands on either side.
' Well, some of my schoolmates will be disappointed. He doesn't sleep in a coffin after all,' she thought to herself.
He was staring at her, studying her awed reaction. Severus couldn't believe she was there, that he had actually invited there.
" Take a seat," he commanded, pointing to the couch.
' Okay,' Kyra thought a bit amused. ' He's not what we may call a 'gracious host'.' However, she did as he told her and he sat on one of the large armchairs. He had moved it, so that they were facing each other.
" Now tell me, what is it you dream about?" He asked with an almost kind note in his voice.
" I never remember my dreams. But I don't think they're bad…" She stopped, unsure of how to go on.
" Elaborate some more, Miss Gardner." Kyra took a deep breath and hoped she could explain it correctly.
" I never wake up scared or feeling that thing you usually feel in your stomach after a bad dream, you know that sensation?" Snape nodded; he could have written a book on that. " Well, I never have it. What I do feel is like a… restlessness, I guess."
" How is that?"
" It's like… damn, I don't know," she said, a bit frustrated.
" Miss Gardner, watch your language," warned Snape.
" Oh, yeah, sorry. Thing is, I wake up feeling the way I feel every time I perform a spell: like I need more, like something inside of me asks for more magic…" For the first time in the years she had known him, Snape looked truly concerned.
" Are you sure about that?"
" Yes sir," she answered, lifting a shaky hand and running it through her adorably ruffled hair.
Severus noticed her shivers and leaned closer to her, their previous conversation forgotten as he thought of something that could make her feel better.
" You need to relax a little. A soothing potion might help," he said, getting up.
" No… no. No potions, Professor, please," Kyra pleaded.
" Are you refusing my help?" His tone had gone stern once again and Kyra hated that. He had been civil, almost nice to her up to that moment and she didn't want to do anything to change that.
" No! Not at all!" She hurried to explain. " It's just that… I try to use magic a little as possible."
" Haven't you just told me that you feel the urge for more magic?"
" Exactly, what if then I can't control it?" She asked, fear creeping into her voice.
" You are here to learn magic and also to learn how to control it," lectured the Professor in him.
" Yeah, but why use it when you can do things naturally?" Was her delicate question.
" You mean, the Muggle way," Said Severus, sounding a bit bothered.
A smile slipped onto Kyra's face immediately. " Yup. I like that better."
" You are a witch, Miss Gardner and you belong to the wizarding world." Another lecture was about to start, but Kyra didn't let it flourish.
" As disgusting as this may sound to a Slytherin, I belong to both worlds," she said, softly but firmly.
" Don't you think you should choose? A person cannot live torn between two lifestyles."
" The way I see it, Professor, it's a lot more valuable having the best of both worlds than denying the existence of either one of them." She was correct and he knew that. That didn't mean, though, that he had to admit it.
" All right, then," he conceded. " What Muggle concoct will you drink to feel more relaxed?" Kyra laughed softly.
" Some hot cocoa might help." Snape nodded curtly and a house elf appeared. As he spoke to him, Kyra stood up and approached his large library.
Her eyes widened at the collection of books he had in there. It was like Disneyland to her... actually, a sale at Escada would be her Magic Kingdom, while Severus Snape's library was her Epcot Center and she got lost in the study of the book's titles. She was so marveled that Snape's voice from behind startled her.
" Found anything interesting?" He asked.
" Yeah, like, everything! This is… awesome!"
" Not many students appreciate books." His tone had softened once again and that made her smile turn into a grin.
" I do… I mean, woa…" She turned to him with bright eyes and he handed her one of the mugs the house elf had brought. Their fingers met momentarily and Kyra felt a rush of warmth flooding her body.
' Okay, what the hell was that?' She questioned herself as her body went through tremors and her heart rate was exponentially increased. After taking the mug, Kyra went on speaking, trying to forget the sensations their accidental touch had arisen in her. " Have you read them all?"
" Yes. Some of them more than once," Snape replied, noticing his voice had gone husky.
He was at a loss of words. How could she command such a reaction from his body with only that feathery touch? It had felt so right, all that electricity... had she felt it too? All he knew right then was that her soft skin touching his had been enough to almost drive all rational thought from his head.
' Oh, get a hold of yourself, you ridiculous idiot!' He reprimanded himself.
As from a tacit agreement, the two of them went back to their seats and drank the cocoa in silence, staring at the fire, fearing what could happen if their eyes met.
He had relaxed a bit in her presence and in the fiery red glow, Kyra noticed his pained expression. At that point she knew for sure Severus Snape was not a monstrous villain who took pleasure in tormenting children, but a man who seemed to have accepted the darkness that followed him around wherever he went.
She couldn't understand why Potter and his friends hated him as blatantly as they did. The Boy Who lived had started Hogwarts while she was in her fifth year and she never understood the commotion about his arrival. He had managed to discover some of Hogwarts' many mysteries, but that didn't mean she had to like him, did it? It bothered her seeing how much he abhorred and mistrusted Snape. She didn't think he was that bad. And right now, she felt sorry for him, but at the same time, other feelings flooded through her, ones she couldn't quite explain.
Severus looked up and their eyes met once again; Kyra found herself captivated by those black pools. They stared into hers steadily, as if they would learn everything there was to know about her. But it only lasted for a second.
" It would be better if you went back to your room, Miss Gardner. You must try to get some sleep," he said with great effort.
Kyra knew he was right, but she was still reluctant to leave. She felt so secure there with him that it made her wish she could stay. Summoning all her willpower, she stood up without breaking eye contact. " You're right, Sir. Thank you very much for listening to me."
" It is my duty. Meet me tomorrow after lunch and I'll let you know what the Headmaster and I think of your condition."
" OK, Professor Snape. See you tomorrow then," said the girl with a smile. " Have a good night," she added, before disappearing through his door, taking all the light and warmth with her.
Severus remained sitting for a long time, lost in an argument with himself, which ended in a heartrending: ' She could never love an old dark wizard like me. What is more, I probably repulse her.'
Sighing heavily, he went to his bed and it would be at almost the crack of dawn when he would realize he had used the 'l' word related to Kyra Gardner.