Jim's Folly

I took a break from this for awhile. My mind needed it…and I don't want to become obsessed. Obsession is bad. Idolatry is sin. Obeying God is fun. ^_^ He blessed me this week. Thanks, Lord. I appreciate it. ^_^

Anyway, I have plenty of new ideas now, so….yeah.

Chapter Thirty Seven

"So, your father's been visiting for awhile, I noticed?" Silver asked as they stood on the dock. The weather was cloudy and cool, as usual, but Jim didn't seem to mind.

He nodded and sighed. "Yeah. It's funny, though…it's like he's trying to earn my forgiveness, but he's being such a jerk about it. I mean, he's making all these rude comments about Ray, and…yeah. It's just…he's not you, Silver."
The old cyborg smiled warmly at Jim's comment. "Thanks, lad. That means a lot to me."

Jim was quiet for awhile. Leland was somewhere amongst the docks, observing. He'd not been to Montressor in years…it would take some time to regain his bearings. Jim didn't mind at all; as long as Leland was far, far away, it would all be fine.

Silver sighed. "Well, lad. What're your future plans? I heard you resigned from being a captain and all, and I thought…"

Jim smiled. "I'm taking time off. I want to spend time with my wife."
"She works full time, Jimbo."
"I know, but…if I was still a captain, I'd be spacing in another galaxy. I wouldn't be here to greet her when she came home at night."
Silver smiled warmly. "Who would have thought such a hard, cold and uncaring boy like yerself would fall in love, get married, and say such sweet things about a bonny lass who actually agreed to be with ya." He chuckled to himself. Goodness. Jimbo had gotten himself into quite a lot.

Jim shrugged. "I don't mind one bit, you know. Being whatever you think is…less manly, if you will."
Silver nodded. "Fancy that."

---

It was a bleak afternoon on Montressor when Raven returned home early, pale as a sheet.

Jim was at her side immediately. "What is it? Are you okay?"

She held up a piece of paper. "I've been…dismissed."
Jim's eyes went wide. "They fired you?!"

"They…let me go, was more the term they used…"

Jim didn't rub her back to comfort her, he didn't hug her, he didn't whisper sweet words of reassurance into her ear. Instead, he gritted his teeth and seethed. "What is that about!? Did they give you a reason?"

Raven shrugged. "Apparently I'm no longer needed because they have no need for a dance program anymore. It's not considered a requirement for graduation. Few students seemed interested, they said, so they let me go." She paused. "They at least let me go with a recommendation if I want to apply anywhere else."

Jim shook his head, anger visible in his face. "That's…unbelievable. I can't believe this…I-ugh!" He cried out and hit his fist against the wall, making Raven jump.

She smiled faintly. "Tuesday is my last class…I'm to have my office cleaned out by then, etcetera, etcetera."

Jim said nothing but gathered her into his arms. He had no words for her. Instead, his mind was going through every curse word, every punishment and torture he could think of to do to those cruel people who'd fired his wife.

Raven pulled away and looked into his eyes. "We'll be okay, Jim…I'll get a job somewhere else, even if it means bussing tables…"
Jim smirked. Even he could do that. He had plenty of experience there.

Shrugging, Jim let her go and took her hand. Entering the kitchen, Jim's somber expression brought questions from his mother. Raven explained, and Sarah frowned.

Her reaction was a lot better than Jim's had been.

Raven was taking it well, Sarah told her son later. "It's going to be okay, Jim. You'll see."

Hugging Jim, Sarah left the kitchen to give Jim space to seethe.

---

Later that evening, Leland knocked on the door of Jim and Raven's room.

"'lo? Kids, it's me."
Jim opened the door a crack, his angered expression barely visible. Leland pushed the door open rudely and entered the room.

"Just wanted to say congrats to both of ya…y'know, even though you got married awhile ago, I never really got the chance to talk with you." Leland pushed his hands into his pockets and looked around for Raven. When he couldn't see her, he looked at his son and cocked his head. "Where's yer wife?"'

Jim nodded his head towards the bathroom. "In there. Why?"

"As I said, boy, I wanted to say congrats."

"Well, thanks. It's late. Go to bed," Jim suggested forcefully.

Leland smiled faintly. "When are you going to bed? Or are you going-"
Jim shot his father a glare that would silence Captain Amelia.

Leland grinned, amused. "Ah…time for my pure, precious little boy to become a man, eh?"

Jim felt his blood boil. He clenched his fists and resisted punching his father out right then and there. His mother would kill him for getting blood on the carpet, though.

"Well, am I right? My boy's a good boy. He's never done a wrong thing in his life," Leland stated.

Biting his lip, Jim seethed, "You know nothing of my past."
Leland sat down on Jim's bed and nodded. "No, boy, I don't. Tell me, please."
Jim scowled. "Why are you asking me this now?"

Leland grinned. "Caught you at a bad time?"

Jim crossed his arms. "I don't remember you being such a jerk," he scoffed.

Leland shrugged and leaned back on Jim's bed, supporting himself with his arms.

"Well, a decade of being away from your family can do that to you. Don't do that to your family, okay? I did a stupid thing when I left you guys. Sarah knows this already. I told her at your wedding how sorry I was, but from the way you're speaking to me already, I can tell it'll take longer to win your forgiveness."

Jim said nothing. Inside, his heart was aching. From jerk, to apologetic father. What a turn of events.

Was he drunk?

Jim crossed his arms. "You know what, Leland Hawkins? When you left, you tore my world apart. Everything about you I looked up to disappeared when you walked out on us, and there's nothing you can do that will give that back. When you left, you took a piece of me with you. That piece you still have, and it's a piece of my life I'll never have returned to me."
Leland blinked solemnly. "Your childhood."
Jim nodded. "Yes, my childhood. There are so many things I wish you could have seen me do, you know. When I built my solar surfer, you didn't care. When I got winning grades on my tests at school, you passed me by without so much as a glance. Way to raise a son, Dad." Jim glared at his father, who stood, eye to eye with his son.

Leland gritted his teeth and spat the words at his son. "Look, James. I tried to be there. I left because I found no happiness with you. You weren't where I needed to be, try as hard as I did. I wanted to love you in that time, but I couldn't. Jim, I tried to be proud of you, but I was so caught up in myself I had no time for anything else, even your mother."
Jim shook his head. "Get out."

Leland smiled faintly. "You're so much like me, though. Yet different in many ways."

He brushed a stray hair from his son's forehead and Jim flinched at the cold touch.

"You're meaner. Colder, harder. Yet you love your wife. And that's where you'll succeed when I failed."
With that, Leland turned and left.

---

Author's Note: I can't decide whether or not Leland's TRYING to be a jerk or not...It seems I make him nice and then mean ten second later. I know it's making him out of character, but I suppose I'm turning his character into a cocky jerk who cares nothing for his family. He contradicts himself many times, lies to his son many times…and I'm leaving it that way because Leland was supposed to only be there as a shocker, but he weaseled his way into my story. *shudders* Yuck.