Wow…almost three months since my last update, that has to be a record.
Sorry!
Pat: I don't know about spidey, but I'll see what I can do.
Flamingo1: Yes, but Doggy will get his revenge?
Pale Shades of Pink: Oh my. You changed your penname again! I'm sorry I didn't update sooner, I got caught up in all the other stories. I looked you up and I saw you were going to get out of X-fiction. That's too bad. Some people just don't have the taste or the grace to accept good writing like yours.
Rogue77: I'm glad you liked it! I finally got around to updating!
kukume: Heh, that's why I had him shampoo his chest. I figured that he probably would shampoo all over. Glad you liked it!
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Rahne: We're back!
Jean: I died!
Arcane: Get over it.
Rahne: After a few months on hiatus, we finally got back! Now we're gonna have some real fun!
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Luger returns to headquarters. Several cops walk out of the building.
Ray: Well, it's back to the salt mines!
Kitty: Can I drive this time?
Sam: Officer Ray, didn't I arrest you a few days ago?
Ray: *glare* I have no idea what you're talking about. You know, looks can be deceiving. You look like a mini mart owner.
He walks into the building, past the Ten Misdemeanors or Less line-
Mesmero: I must be in the wrong line.
-where many people are wearing sunglasses and talking on cell phones.
Roberto: Hello Mom.
Evan: *not on phone, pointing at Remy* This is supposed to be an express line! This guy has fourteen counts!
Remy: Shut up, mon ami!
He walks past a woman working with a police profiler.
Danny: I don't remember his face…or his eyes, or his build. Yes! That's it!
Photo artist: *Holds up picture.*
Everything was as it should be. In the middle of the room, there was a gathering of officers that piqued his interest. He went over to see what the hubbub was about.
Bobby: Hey Dooley, give it a break.
Scott: What's going on?
Arcade, as Dooley, is struggling to get out of a straitjacket.
Bobby: Dooley here bet us he could get out of this straitjacket in fifteen minutes.
Scott: How long has he been at it?
Bobby: Three days.
Scott: Better step on it Dooley.
Dooley nods ferverently. Suddenly a loud booming voice catches everyone's attention. Xavier as the police chief barges in and starts yelling. (Or rather, wheels in)
Xavier: WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA? GET BACK TO WORK! YOU THINK CRIME'S TAKIN' A HOLIDAY? THINK AGAIN! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT, LUGER?"
Scott: I want the York case.
Xavier: THERE IS NO YORK CASE! IT WAS A SUICIDE! *wheels over to snack bar* COFFEE!? CAPUCCINO? ESPRESSO?! *twist some knobs and sparks fly out of the machine* HEY SCOTTIE! CAN YOU GET THIS MACHINE TO WORK!?
Rahne: *Pops up from behind machine in full police uniform* I'm givin' her all she's got Captain! If I push her any harder, the whole thing will blow!
Xavier:*moves exasperatedly to snack bar* Give me my plate!
Scott: I don't think York's was a suicide. I think she was on to something!
Xavier:*loads an entire banquet onto his plate* On something's more like it! You know those WILDERNESS COOKIES WERE LACED WITH COCAINE!
Scott: *thinks* No wonder I couldn't eat just one! *follows Xavier into his office*
Xavier: *prepares to dig in at his desk*
Scott: York left me a message. She'd uncovered a drug running operation, I think that's what got her killed.
Xavier: You don't think it was the bullets?
Scott: Give me the case.
Xavier: You're three days from retirement Luger, let it go.
Scott: Let it go? She was a partner, a friend! I owe her! I owe it to every cop who's every walked a beat, who's ever made a bust, who's ever laid HIS LIFE ON THE LINE!
Xavier: WAIT A MINUTE! I'M THE CAPTAIN HERE, I'M THE ONE WHO DOES ALL THE YELLING! BUT IF IT"S THAT IMPORTANT TO YOU, TAKE THE DAMN CASE!
Scott: THANK YOU! Err, thank you.
Xavier: DON'T BE SO QUICK TO THANK ME ON THIS ONE LUGER, YOU'RE GONNA BE NECKIN' ON THIS ONE, IT'S ON THE LINE FOR YOU, PEOPLE ARE GONNA BE WATCHIN. NOW YOU BLOW IT, YOU'RE GOING DOWN, IF YOU SCREW UP, YOU'RE GOING TO BE HUNG OUT TO DRY, YOU DROP THE BALL, AND YOU'RE GOING TO BE LEFT TWISTING IN THE WIND! IF YOU EMBARESS THIS DEPARTMENT, YOUR PANTS WILL BE DANCING WITH FIGS! IS THAT CLEAR?!
Scott: Everything but the pants fig thing.
They leave the office, and the Captain tells more bad news.
Xavier: Narcos are sending over one of their burned out psychos to help look into the Wilderness Girls cookies. I'm teaming him with you.
Scott: But sir, you know I always work alone.
Jubilee: Whatever happened to teamwork?
Rahne: You. Out.
Xavier: You get the case, you get Jack Colt!
Across the room, 'Jack' takes out a lighter and begins flicking it. Scott looks at it with great apprehension.
Scott: LIGHTER!!!
Various people in station: Lighter! HIT THE FLOOR!
Luger runs to attack Colt, but Colt throws him to the ground. Station personnel grab and hold him down.
Xavier: HEY! BACK OFF! THAT'S LUGER'S NEW PARTNER!
Ororo: *plays random woman that walks up* By the goddesses….
Rahne: Say the lines fast, then you can go.
Ororo: Captain! You can't seriously think of using this man! He's dangerous! A menace! A loose canon! A walking time bomb! And most of all, he is gun happy!
Pyro: *Pulls flamethrower out of…somewhere.* Where do you get off saying that? *struggles to stop pointing flamethrower at Ororo.*
Ororo: I give up! *walks off*
Xavier: there's someone you have to talk too if this case involves cookies.
Scott: *looks horrified* Not him!
Xavier: Yeah. HIM!
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Dun Dun Dun! Who is 'him'? Stay tuned to see!
Rahne: There's gonna be lots of fun next chapter! Please leave some reviews!