Treading Water-Part 4

A pain. A dull throbbing pain. One of those pains that you are always aware of but can forget about if there are more pressing matters to attend to. This pain, where was it coming from? Where? This was one of the most prominent thoughts on Phoebe's mind as her consciousness took over. Gradually she became aware that the origin of the pain was her head.

She opened her eyes and let out a small groan. Not only was her head hurting but now her eyes were, from the light. Why did they have to make it so bright in her 'room'? It wasn't necessary. She'd be quite happy sitting in the dark or at least softer lighting. But no, then they wouldn't be able to see her properly, observe her. They thought she wasn't aware of them standing by the door, looking through that small window, staring, taking notes but she was.

Phoebe didn't like feeling like she was an animal in a zoo but she was exactly like that. They'd stand watching her every move, seeing what she would do next and if she got too rowdy in their opinion they'd come in and tame her. No, she wasn't an animal in a zoo she was like a lab rat. Being watched, written about and given a drug or two here and there.

Laughter escaped her lips at this thought. God she really was off the bend, not right in the head, a loony tune, insane, whichever name you thought best to use. Even she knew that some of her thoughts were strange. They were strange but rather funny at times. These amusing thoughts were some of the times where she didn't mind them so much but it was the other times, which made her wish she could stay in her world. Stay where everything was peaceful, where her sisters still breathed and were full of life. She longed for it to be real, longed to belong there, to live there permanently.

Tears began to well up in Phoebe's eyes again. This happened every time she wished for her world to be real. She'd cry here eyes out for it until she feel asleep or the doctors saw to her. Soon the tears were falling fast down her face as Phoebe worked herself up more and more.

"Phoebe..." A faint voice called.

Phoebe stopped sobbing for a second. She could have sworn she had heard someone call her name. Then again this wouldn't have been the first time she had heard voices. It was all part and parcel of being slightly off tilt.

"Phoebe..." There it was again!

A look of confusion crossed her face. Was she really hearing things? She had to know. Slowly she sat up, blinking a little to clear the tears from her eyes.

"Phoebe..." It came again.

The voice she was hearing sounded so familiar as if it belonged to someone she once knew. Turning around she could have sworn the voice belonged to...

"Prue!" Phoebe uttered in disbelief. Her hand made her way up to cover her mouth, she was too shocked to move, too shocked to do anything. Was Prue really standing there before her? Or was this another cruel trick of her mind.

"Phoebe," Prue said with a warm smile. She opened her arms wide and knelt down so she was eye level with her sister. "Come here."

Fresh tears fell down Phoebe's face as she rushed forward into her sister's waiting arms. "Prue! I-I can't believe it. I-I...Prue..." She spluttered through tears.

"Hey, shh shh. It's alright, I'm here," Prue said softly, stroking her sister's hair lightly.

"I...missed y-you so much," Phoebe cried into her sister's shoulder. She pulled herself as close to Prue as she physically could ,like you would if you were clinging to a life preserver. It was the thing that mattered most right now; she had to know that her sister was there.

"Phoebe, everything is all right. Everything is going to be just fine." Prue whispered while smoothing her sister's hair back from her face. She looked down into Phoebe's eyes and smiled reassuringly.

Phoebe gazed up into her sister's blue eyes. Searching for the answer, the proof that everything would indeed be ok. If Prue said it then she could trust her word, right? But people just didn't come back from the dead or did they? Phoebe wasn't even sure anymore.

"Prue, there's something... I h-have to explain" Phoebe stated, still sobbing slightly.

"Phoebe you don't have to explain anything," Prue said hugging Phoebe a little more.

"Yes I do. I have to! Please! I-I need to... for me" Phoebe pleaded, her words rushed.

Prue looked away for a second before nodding, "Alright then."

Phoebe smiled and then pulled away a little, not looking at her sister. "It's... It's about your death. I've thought about that and other things a lot. Every day! It just goes round in my head. Taunting. It makes me wish that I'd just... " She trailed off for a second, taking a calming breath before continuing. "That day my world almost fell apart. I couldn't believe... accept it. I may have looked as if as I was fine but inside I was falling apart, I just put on a brave face, distanced myself. I regret that now. Piper blamed herself. Naturally, she would. She felt so guilty about being brought back when you weren't. She was blind... she could never see the truth..."

"Which was?" Prue asked, interrupting.

Phoebe looked directly at Prue. "That it was my fault. If I had just of been there!" She yelled in annoyance. " But, no. I was too selfish. I had to go to the Underworld to save Cole, I wish I'd never done that now, otherwise none of this would've ever happened." She finished. The words she just spoke were some of the sanest to come out of her mouth in a long time. Phoebe looked at Prue expectantly, waiting for her sister to tell her what she had just said wasn't true, that she could never have predicted what was going to happen.

"That's right. Everything you just said is true," Prue said with an almost too sweet smile on her face.

"W-what?" Phoebe asked in confusion. She had not expected her sister to agree with what she had said.

"That my death is your fault along with Piper and Paige's deaths. In fact everything that has happened from when I died has been your fault." Prue said viciously.

"No! Prue stop! Don't!" Phoebe said backing up a little.

Prue stood up and began to walk towards her little sister who attempted to scramble away " Oh yes my dear sister I am quite justified by what I'm saying. You just admitted to your faults yourself so why are you denying it? Look at you, you're pathetic even more so than when I was still living. All you do is sit around and feel sorry for yourself, well boohoo. No one gives a shit about you and no one ever did, so deal with it!" Prue spat. She looked down at her sister; sweet smile turning into a sickly wicked one.

"P-Prue why are you saying this?" Phoebe asked in a small, almost child like voice. She was backed right into the wall, there was no where else for her to go. Did Prue really think that? Or was she just angry at the whole situation? Phoebe had failed her sisters, she hadn't vanquished Cole, and she hadn't taken him back, so he had sought revenge,

"Because it's the truth and you need to hear it. I'm sick of you. Half the time when I was alive I couldn't stand you and neither could your sisters. It's your fault they're dead and it's you're fault that I'm dead! All your fault, just like everything else!" Prue said leaning forward so she was closer to her sister's face.

"No!" Phoebe screamed, "No! no! No! NO!" She then lunged for Prue but all that she hit was air. She fell onto the floor in a heap, breathing hard. What had just happened? Where had Prue gone or had she ever been there in the first place? These were the questions which plagued Phoebe's mind as she cried herself into a restless sleep.

~ ~ ~ ~

Laris watched the scene before him unfold, a sickly smile spreading across his face as it played out. Everything had gone as planned, Phoebe had begun to hallucinate, it was almost too perfect.

Naturally anyone else watching would just think that Phoebe had gone round the bend and came back for a second round. They would believe her to be more insane than she already was. Of course Laris could see what was happening. His power was the catalyst. It was only a matter of time before things gained momentum, like an avalanche it would soon become destructive.

A small laugh escaped his lips as it occurred to him how much Cole would love to witness this. After all the former Source was the brains behind the operation. Laris knew how much Phoebe's suffering would amuse yet pain Cole.

Satisfied by what he had seen Laris turned and began to walk in the direction of the male bathroom. He knew it was wise to report to Cole sooner rather than later.