To ladyluck, Tarrilyn Romita Slejandra Jacqueline Marguerite Jolissa, and smileypal4eva: you've been SUCH a great help! Thank you, thank you!
To Smileypal4eva: Note taken. Even though hitting "enter" all the time gets annoying. Arg...
To Slone: Luckily for me, this is for fun and NOT for english class. (If this were a class assignment, you wouldn't have read this far!) However, after reading your review, I re-read my chapter and could not see how it could be classified as "cute."
To Rizka: I picked the name Elijah (it was Illiah, but the it's hard to see the difference between the L's and the "I", so I changed it) because I felt like it. He's not a character in any of the TP books, which is kind of the point. He's mine--all mine! Mwahahaha!
To White-Wolf: the "gary gets jealous and punches him..." was funny. I laughed out loud. I doubt I'll use it, but I'll think on it. AND YOU HAVE TO CONTINUE YOUR STORY!!!!!
To Crown, Faithful, Karana, angle, Chopstix*, Devilkitti8, anonymous, Moi, Elspeth, raven-winged, merky, DivaBear, Kate, and R: Thank you guys SOOO much for the encouragement! And keep reviewing!!
And a note: Here are the votes so far: Gary--2, George--3, Jon--1
Chapter six--
"Geof! You're back!" Gary exclaimed.
"She's alright, thankfully," the boy answered, his face lighting up in a grin. He glanced to Alanna, the question in his eyes easy to read. Gary turned to Alanna.
"My squire, Geoffrey of Meron. He had to go home because of family problems. His mother was deathly ill," Gary explained. Alanna attempted a small curtsy and winced when her ankles made a popping sound.
"I am Alanna of Trebond," she said politely. Geoffrey bowed in return.
"I was just going to introduce Alanna to everyone," Gary continued. "Care to join us?"
"In a while. I've got unpacking to do."
"That's alright, Geof. Take your time."
As soon as Geof was out of sight, Alanna glared at Gary. Shrugging, Gary took Alanna's arm and led her down the hallways, humming to himself.
"You have a squire?"
"Well, I'm a knight. What'd you expect?" Gary answered reasonably.
"Well...I...what about our lessons?" Alanna asked. Smiling reassuringly, Gary led them left, turning into a larger hallway.
"Don't worry, I won't tell him. I'll just keep him busy with something else, alright?"
"How? I mean, he is your squire," Alanna pointed out. "Isn't he supposed to follow you around and...help you, or whatever it is that squires do?"
"I could always give him the day off," Gary replied cheerfully. "Lighten up, Alanna. You take things too seriously." They continued in silence for a moment.
"Where are we meeting them?" asked Alanna, fighting to keep the nervousness out of her voice.
"I'm guessing that they'd be in the courtyard. Then again, you never know. Well, Alex would be in the courtyard, anyway. He spends most of his time there."
"Oh," Alanna breathed, relieved. They were to meet Gary's friends one-by-one, as opposed to meeting them in the same room altogether, as she'd anticipated. As they neared the courtyard, the sound of clanging metal rang out, loud and clear. The sound seemed to soothe her, and Alanna smiled as they entered into the open area.
Two men were circling each other, each carrying a blunted sword. Leaning against the wall to the left was a young woman with deep brown hair and fair skin. Next to her stood Jonathon with his right arm around her thin waist. All four turned as one to stare at Alanna and Gary.
"Taking on Alex again, Raoul? Tsk tsk," Gary called. Alanna bowed her head, staring at her shuffling feet. So, she was to meet them all at once after all.
"It wasn't my idea," muttered Raoul. Gary laughed and thumped him in the back.
"Jon's idea again?"
"Who else?"
The woman standing next to Jon cleared her throat loudly and jerked her head pointedly toward Alanna. Gary grinned and gestured toward the company.
"Alanna, you've already met Jon and Raoul. This is Alex, the best fencer of all of us. Actually, I think he's the best fencer that the Chamber has turned out! And that lovely lady next to Jon is the incomparable Lady Delia of Eldorne. All of you, here is Alanna."
Alanna nodded deeply instead of curtsying for fear of her ankles cracking again. She noted the flicker of disapproval in Delia's eyes and the look on Jon's face. Sighing, Alanna curtsied. Luckily, her ankles created no sound.
"Alex and Raoul had a fight--" began Jon.
"A disagreement," Raoul interuppted. Jon smiled.
"An argument, and I suggested that they settle it in a swordfight."
"Which is very unfair," Raoul said quickly.
"Well, please continue," Alanna said, smiling. "Don't let us distract you."
"That's fine, Lady Alanna," Alex said smoothly. "We're finished here." He looked to Raoul, who sighed deeply and handed over two silver coins. Alex accepted them with a cocky grin.
"A bet?" prompted Alanna. Alex shrugged.
"He owed me."
There was an awkward moment of silence that followed. Alanna shifted from foot to foot, waiting for someone to say something. Fortunately, Jon rescued them all.
"Why don't we all go for a ride?" he suggested. "So that we can learn more about the fiery woman with whom Gary spends his free hours."
"R-riding?"
"You do know how to ride, don't you?" Jon pressed. Gary nudged her.
"I do, but--"
"Good," Jon interuppted. "Let's go riding."
-----------------------------------------------
The horse that was given to Alanna was a shy dapple mare, one of Alex's. She was numb as he helped her into the side-saddle. Instantly, memories of her riding lessons at the convent filled her with dread. She gulped as she watched the others mount, Jon helping Delia onto her own mare. Gary nudged his horse so that he was riding next to Alanna. Alex was to Gary's left while Delia and Jon rode ahead of them. Alanna glanced around to find Raoul.
"He'll catch up," Gary explained, catching her look. "He's a bit slow with the horses. Well, not always, but today's one of those days."
Alanna nodded and focused her thoughts on the horse beneath her. The mare was slow and steady, but still Alanna felt uncomfortable. She heard Raoul's mount fall in step to her right, but Alann didn't glance up at him.
"Are you alright?" Gary asked. "You look a little sick."
"I-I'm fine," gasped Alanna. D-don't worry about me."
"You are looking really pale," remarked Raoul. "Are you sure you're alright?" Alanna nodded and gripped tighter on the reins.
"W-what's between Delia and Jon?" Alanna asked in an effort to turn the attention away from her.
"Jon met her some years ago. When was it, Raoul?"
"He was a squire, I think," Raoul said. Gary nodded.
"That sounds right," Alex commented.
"Anyway, they're really close now," Gary continued. "We're sure that he'll propose any day now."
"They hate spending a moment apart," Raoul said, grinning.
"Have you heard the poems he wrote for her?" whispered Gary.
"Of course she hasn't," Alex retorted. Gary gave him a look before leaning closer to Alanna.
"He always read them to us first. There was one that went something like: How your beauty shines above...no, that's not right." Gary frowned.
"How your beauty shining bright?" suggested Raoul.
"No, more like: How is your beauty shining above--"
"Wait!" interuppted Raoul. "I remember now! Where your beauty shines--"
"That's a different poem," Gary reminded him. Raoul frowned.
"No, it's the same poem. Maybe a different line but..."
"The two of you!" sighed Alex. He looked pointedly to Alanna. "It was: How your shining beauty illuminates everything around you; you make me feel lighter when I'm blue."
"Yea, that's right!" Gary exclaimed. "And then Delia laughed at him in front of the entire court!"
"Don't think I can't hear you!" Jon called. Raoul and Gary burst out laughing. Alanna forced herself to smile and battled the bile that was pushing its way up. Squeezing her eyes shut, she tried to imagine that she wasn't riding side-saddle but instead riding the mare with a leg on each side, like a man.
"Alanna, you really don't look well," Raoul said. At this, Alanna pulled tight on the reins and stopped the horse. Sliding off, she landed lightly on the ground and glared at the mare. Gary and Raoul immediately stopped. Alex rode around and placed a hand on the mare.
"I'm sorry. Was she misbehaving? She does that sometimes," Alex apologized. Alanna shook her head, half to reassure him and partly to clear her mind.
"It's alright. I'm just...It's more like..." Alanna trailed off and looked helplessly at him.
"Are you sure you're not sick?" Gary asked, concerned, as he dismounted. Alanna held up her hand.
"No, don't worry about me. I'm fine. I'll just--" Glaring at the saddle, she unbuckled and threw it off in one quick motion. Just as swiftly, with one arm on the neck of the mare, Alanna threw her leg up over the side. Seconds later, she sat comfortably on the horse, one leg on each side and without the saddle, which she carried in her arms. When she cared to look around, Alanna found herself surrounded by shocked expressions.
"Stop gawking at her like she's the villiage fool," Gary reprimanded. He remounted and nudged his horse forward. "Let's go to the river." Alanna followed him gratefully. The band continued in silence for a while, Jon and Delia once again riding ahead of them, both of them casting Alanna strange looks that she chose to ignore.
"Anything you'd like to tell me?" Gary probed after a while. Alanna shrugged.
"You're uncomfortable riding side-saddle," Raoul reasoned. Alanna stared at him for a while before looking away.
"When you're riding side-saddle, it's harder to stay on. The horses at the convent had quite a bit of fun throwing me into the mud." She chuckled nervously. "And running over me."
"Were you hurt?"
"Of course I was hurt," Alanna snapped at Raoul. "Mostly galloped over my leg. Once a gelding cantered over my arm." She winced at the memory. "There was also the times that they threw me so hard I had a concussion."
"How can that be?" Alex mused. "Wouldn't they give gentle horses to the ladies?"
"Well, what can I say? They just didn't like me."
"Hmmm...maybe there was something you did, or something you were wearing that they didn't like," Alex suggested. "A horse once threw me off because of the smell of my shirt. Or at least that's how the doctors explained it when I woke up."
Alanna found herself smiling. Noticing it, Gary broke into a relieved grin. Jon glanced over his shoulder at them for a moment, catching Alanna's eye. Staring into his deep blue eyes, she felt a shiver of foreboding.
-----------------------------------------
School's starting tomorrow, so this might be the last chapter I put up for a while.
Well, after putting it off for two chapters in a row, here it is!! Where Alanna meets Gary's close friends!! The other point of this chapter: Delia. She's not evil in this version (or is she?...hehe! You'll just have to wait and see!!) And since, after all, Jon isn't in love with Alanna, he's head-over-heels with Delia.
Another point--to give Alanna 1 more reason to hate the convent.
And I haven't decided a lot of things about this story yet, but obviously, something bad is going to happen. (duh!) And it's directly connected to Jon. Thus, the "shiver of foreboding" Hey, maybe I could make JON the evil one!!! HAHA!
Coming up: More about Elijah, More about George, more about...well, everyone. And the introduction of (drumroll...) Roger...and many more characters (some of which may be MINE!).
And I also haven't decided if she should like everyone yet. Maybe I'll keep her withdrawn and unfriendly for a couple more chapters, or possibly she may take a liking to Raoul and Alex. I dunno at this point.
So, REVIEW. I am in need of ideas. Advice. BE BRUTAL. Wait! I take that back! Just review like you usually do, and I'm crossin' my fingers.
BTW--I need more characters!!!!! Please, tell me more!! At least 1 name of a person and their looks, and personality in EVERYBODY'S REVIEW! HEAR THAT??? EACH ONE OF YOU HAVE TO DO THIS!!!! OR ELSE.... (hehe)
Please try to do diff. people.
To Smileypal4eva: Note taken. Even though hitting "enter" all the time gets annoying. Arg...
To Slone: Luckily for me, this is for fun and NOT for english class. (If this were a class assignment, you wouldn't have read this far!) However, after reading your review, I re-read my chapter and could not see how it could be classified as "cute."
To Rizka: I picked the name Elijah (it was Illiah, but the it's hard to see the difference between the L's and the "I", so I changed it) because I felt like it. He's not a character in any of the TP books, which is kind of the point. He's mine--all mine! Mwahahaha!
To White-Wolf: the "gary gets jealous and punches him..." was funny. I laughed out loud. I doubt I'll use it, but I'll think on it. AND YOU HAVE TO CONTINUE YOUR STORY!!!!!
To Crown, Faithful, Karana, angle, Chopstix*, Devilkitti8, anonymous, Moi, Elspeth, raven-winged, merky, DivaBear, Kate, and R: Thank you guys SOOO much for the encouragement! And keep reviewing!!
And a note: Here are the votes so far: Gary--2, George--3, Jon--1
Chapter six--
"Geof! You're back!" Gary exclaimed.
"She's alright, thankfully," the boy answered, his face lighting up in a grin. He glanced to Alanna, the question in his eyes easy to read. Gary turned to Alanna.
"My squire, Geoffrey of Meron. He had to go home because of family problems. His mother was deathly ill," Gary explained. Alanna attempted a small curtsy and winced when her ankles made a popping sound.
"I am Alanna of Trebond," she said politely. Geoffrey bowed in return.
"I was just going to introduce Alanna to everyone," Gary continued. "Care to join us?"
"In a while. I've got unpacking to do."
"That's alright, Geof. Take your time."
As soon as Geof was out of sight, Alanna glared at Gary. Shrugging, Gary took Alanna's arm and led her down the hallways, humming to himself.
"You have a squire?"
"Well, I'm a knight. What'd you expect?" Gary answered reasonably.
"Well...I...what about our lessons?" Alanna asked. Smiling reassuringly, Gary led them left, turning into a larger hallway.
"Don't worry, I won't tell him. I'll just keep him busy with something else, alright?"
"How? I mean, he is your squire," Alanna pointed out. "Isn't he supposed to follow you around and...help you, or whatever it is that squires do?"
"I could always give him the day off," Gary replied cheerfully. "Lighten up, Alanna. You take things too seriously." They continued in silence for a moment.
"Where are we meeting them?" asked Alanna, fighting to keep the nervousness out of her voice.
"I'm guessing that they'd be in the courtyard. Then again, you never know. Well, Alex would be in the courtyard, anyway. He spends most of his time there."
"Oh," Alanna breathed, relieved. They were to meet Gary's friends one-by-one, as opposed to meeting them in the same room altogether, as she'd anticipated. As they neared the courtyard, the sound of clanging metal rang out, loud and clear. The sound seemed to soothe her, and Alanna smiled as they entered into the open area.
Two men were circling each other, each carrying a blunted sword. Leaning against the wall to the left was a young woman with deep brown hair and fair skin. Next to her stood Jonathon with his right arm around her thin waist. All four turned as one to stare at Alanna and Gary.
"Taking on Alex again, Raoul? Tsk tsk," Gary called. Alanna bowed her head, staring at her shuffling feet. So, she was to meet them all at once after all.
"It wasn't my idea," muttered Raoul. Gary laughed and thumped him in the back.
"Jon's idea again?"
"Who else?"
The woman standing next to Jon cleared her throat loudly and jerked her head pointedly toward Alanna. Gary grinned and gestured toward the company.
"Alanna, you've already met Jon and Raoul. This is Alex, the best fencer of all of us. Actually, I think he's the best fencer that the Chamber has turned out! And that lovely lady next to Jon is the incomparable Lady Delia of Eldorne. All of you, here is Alanna."
Alanna nodded deeply instead of curtsying for fear of her ankles cracking again. She noted the flicker of disapproval in Delia's eyes and the look on Jon's face. Sighing, Alanna curtsied. Luckily, her ankles created no sound.
"Alex and Raoul had a fight--" began Jon.
"A disagreement," Raoul interuppted. Jon smiled.
"An argument, and I suggested that they settle it in a swordfight."
"Which is very unfair," Raoul said quickly.
"Well, please continue," Alanna said, smiling. "Don't let us distract you."
"That's fine, Lady Alanna," Alex said smoothly. "We're finished here." He looked to Raoul, who sighed deeply and handed over two silver coins. Alex accepted them with a cocky grin.
"A bet?" prompted Alanna. Alex shrugged.
"He owed me."
There was an awkward moment of silence that followed. Alanna shifted from foot to foot, waiting for someone to say something. Fortunately, Jon rescued them all.
"Why don't we all go for a ride?" he suggested. "So that we can learn more about the fiery woman with whom Gary spends his free hours."
"R-riding?"
"You do know how to ride, don't you?" Jon pressed. Gary nudged her.
"I do, but--"
"Good," Jon interuppted. "Let's go riding."
-----------------------------------------------
The horse that was given to Alanna was a shy dapple mare, one of Alex's. She was numb as he helped her into the side-saddle. Instantly, memories of her riding lessons at the convent filled her with dread. She gulped as she watched the others mount, Jon helping Delia onto her own mare. Gary nudged his horse so that he was riding next to Alanna. Alex was to Gary's left while Delia and Jon rode ahead of them. Alanna glanced around to find Raoul.
"He'll catch up," Gary explained, catching her look. "He's a bit slow with the horses. Well, not always, but today's one of those days."
Alanna nodded and focused her thoughts on the horse beneath her. The mare was slow and steady, but still Alanna felt uncomfortable. She heard Raoul's mount fall in step to her right, but Alann didn't glance up at him.
"Are you alright?" Gary asked. "You look a little sick."
"I-I'm fine," gasped Alanna. D-don't worry about me."
"You are looking really pale," remarked Raoul. "Are you sure you're alright?" Alanna nodded and gripped tighter on the reins.
"W-what's between Delia and Jon?" Alanna asked in an effort to turn the attention away from her.
"Jon met her some years ago. When was it, Raoul?"
"He was a squire, I think," Raoul said. Gary nodded.
"That sounds right," Alex commented.
"Anyway, they're really close now," Gary continued. "We're sure that he'll propose any day now."
"They hate spending a moment apart," Raoul said, grinning.
"Have you heard the poems he wrote for her?" whispered Gary.
"Of course she hasn't," Alex retorted. Gary gave him a look before leaning closer to Alanna.
"He always read them to us first. There was one that went something like: How your beauty shines above...no, that's not right." Gary frowned.
"How your beauty shining bright?" suggested Raoul.
"No, more like: How is your beauty shining above--"
"Wait!" interuppted Raoul. "I remember now! Where your beauty shines--"
"That's a different poem," Gary reminded him. Raoul frowned.
"No, it's the same poem. Maybe a different line but..."
"The two of you!" sighed Alex. He looked pointedly to Alanna. "It was: How your shining beauty illuminates everything around you; you make me feel lighter when I'm blue."
"Yea, that's right!" Gary exclaimed. "And then Delia laughed at him in front of the entire court!"
"Don't think I can't hear you!" Jon called. Raoul and Gary burst out laughing. Alanna forced herself to smile and battled the bile that was pushing its way up. Squeezing her eyes shut, she tried to imagine that she wasn't riding side-saddle but instead riding the mare with a leg on each side, like a man.
"Alanna, you really don't look well," Raoul said. At this, Alanna pulled tight on the reins and stopped the horse. Sliding off, she landed lightly on the ground and glared at the mare. Gary and Raoul immediately stopped. Alex rode around and placed a hand on the mare.
"I'm sorry. Was she misbehaving? She does that sometimes," Alex apologized. Alanna shook her head, half to reassure him and partly to clear her mind.
"It's alright. I'm just...It's more like..." Alanna trailed off and looked helplessly at him.
"Are you sure you're not sick?" Gary asked, concerned, as he dismounted. Alanna held up her hand.
"No, don't worry about me. I'm fine. I'll just--" Glaring at the saddle, she unbuckled and threw it off in one quick motion. Just as swiftly, with one arm on the neck of the mare, Alanna threw her leg up over the side. Seconds later, she sat comfortably on the horse, one leg on each side and without the saddle, which she carried in her arms. When she cared to look around, Alanna found herself surrounded by shocked expressions.
"Stop gawking at her like she's the villiage fool," Gary reprimanded. He remounted and nudged his horse forward. "Let's go to the river." Alanna followed him gratefully. The band continued in silence for a while, Jon and Delia once again riding ahead of them, both of them casting Alanna strange looks that she chose to ignore.
"Anything you'd like to tell me?" Gary probed after a while. Alanna shrugged.
"You're uncomfortable riding side-saddle," Raoul reasoned. Alanna stared at him for a while before looking away.
"When you're riding side-saddle, it's harder to stay on. The horses at the convent had quite a bit of fun throwing me into the mud." She chuckled nervously. "And running over me."
"Were you hurt?"
"Of course I was hurt," Alanna snapped at Raoul. "Mostly galloped over my leg. Once a gelding cantered over my arm." She winced at the memory. "There was also the times that they threw me so hard I had a concussion."
"How can that be?" Alex mused. "Wouldn't they give gentle horses to the ladies?"
"Well, what can I say? They just didn't like me."
"Hmmm...maybe there was something you did, or something you were wearing that they didn't like," Alex suggested. "A horse once threw me off because of the smell of my shirt. Or at least that's how the doctors explained it when I woke up."
Alanna found herself smiling. Noticing it, Gary broke into a relieved grin. Jon glanced over his shoulder at them for a moment, catching Alanna's eye. Staring into his deep blue eyes, she felt a shiver of foreboding.
-----------------------------------------
School's starting tomorrow, so this might be the last chapter I put up for a while.
Well, after putting it off for two chapters in a row, here it is!! Where Alanna meets Gary's close friends!! The other point of this chapter: Delia. She's not evil in this version (or is she?...hehe! You'll just have to wait and see!!) And since, after all, Jon isn't in love with Alanna, he's head-over-heels with Delia.
Another point--to give Alanna 1 more reason to hate the convent.
And I haven't decided a lot of things about this story yet, but obviously, something bad is going to happen. (duh!) And it's directly connected to Jon. Thus, the "shiver of foreboding" Hey, maybe I could make JON the evil one!!! HAHA!
Coming up: More about Elijah, More about George, more about...well, everyone. And the introduction of (drumroll...) Roger...and many more characters (some of which may be MINE!).
And I also haven't decided if she should like everyone yet. Maybe I'll keep her withdrawn and unfriendly for a couple more chapters, or possibly she may take a liking to Raoul and Alex. I dunno at this point.
So, REVIEW. I am in need of ideas. Advice. BE BRUTAL. Wait! I take that back! Just review like you usually do, and I'm crossin' my fingers.
BTW--I need more characters!!!!! Please, tell me more!! At least 1 name of a person and their looks, and personality in EVERYBODY'S REVIEW! HEAR THAT??? EACH ONE OF YOU HAVE TO DO THIS!!!! OR ELSE.... (hehe)
Please try to do diff. people.