May the Gods have Mercy
Part 11 of The Asgard Sequence
Sequel to 'Only Shooting Stars'
By Gumnut
Sep 2003
Sam chose to be inside the isolation field when he materialized, and it was her who caught him as he crumpled.
The Asgard had supplied her with an antigrav device which enabled her to lower him gently to the waiting platform. They could have levitated him from outside the force field, but she had insisted he would need the comforting presence of touch. In truth, he was probably unconscious, considering the injuries described to her by Thor, so it was really she who needed the comfort.
As his weight appeared in her arms, the first thing she noticed was the green. It was everywhere. He was bleeding through both his nose and mouth, and weeping sores covered all the exposed skin she could see.
At first her heart stopped as his body was still and unresponsive in her hands. Were they too late? But a weak rasping breath saved her. His eyelids fluttered.
He wasn't only alive, he was conscious.
"Colonel?"
His bloodshot eyes opened, wandering across the ceiling, the room, until they latched on to her.
"Sam?" His voice was a bare whisper. "Wha?" His brow crinkled, breaking open a lesion on his forehead. Green blood ran into his eyes.
He blinked rapidly, blinded. "Carter?"
"Colonel, relax - you're safe, and we think we've found a cure for you."
"Carter?" He wrinkled his brow again, anguish written across his face. "I lost you." His eyes blinked again.
He saw her, but he wasn't really seeing her.
She spoke reassuringly. "Sir, the Asgard are going to help you." She hoped desperately she was telling him the truth. She had to blink her own eyes a few times.
She lowered his head on to the platform, lining his body up so that the machine's field would encapsulate him.
Once she had him settled, she stepped back and gave the signal to Loki, who was standing behind the controls with two guards, now accompanied by a hovering Thor.
The genetic manipulator snapped on, its protective field flaring up around the Colonel. His body was lifted, suspended, as the glowing representations of his genetic structure floated in the space around him.
Loki flicked a control and the pattern changed.
Jack, his body suddenly strung tight, gasped a silent scream.
She remembered the pain. She had been whole and healthy at the time. She prayed for him to hold on.
It seemed to go on for hours.
Jack writhed in its grasp.
She turned almost pleadingly to Loki. "Finish it."
"It takes some time, Major Carter, you will have to be patient."
She turned back to O'Neill. Blood still dripped, drifting from his suspended fingertips. He was floating in a haze of his own life fluids.
Come on, come on, come on. She shot another glance at Loki. Thor hovered behind him, a hairsbreath away from taking the controls.
O'Neill gasped again, his eyes wild.
"Loki!" This time it was Thor begging him.
The floating symbols flickered one more time and disappeared.
Carter caught her CO before he could hit the floor. It rained green.
The body was very still, its silence terrifying.
It drew in a sudden ragged breath, as that stubborn Irish O'Neill determination refused to give up. She thanked the nearest deity for his strength.
Speaking of deities...
She was almost blinded by the decontamination flashes throughout the area protected by the isolation field. Now the colonel had been negated as the source of the disease, the Asgard could finally remove the pathogen from the immediate area and treat him.
Suddenly, she was surrounded by efficient grey bodies. Jack was taken from her hands and whisked off into the bowels of the medical section.
She was left, sitting, staring at her green covered hands in the middle of the med room floor.
*********
Daniel was startled as the walls of an Asgard ship suddenly replaced grey concrete.
Spinning around he located his teammates. The look of horror on Janet's face set him spinning back again.
His eyes landed on Sam.
Sam! Oh, thank god!
But it was the body in her arms that brought his heart to a screaming halt.
Jack?
Oh, god, Jack.
As one the three ex-cellmates moved to the flickering isolation field and watched the drama unfold.
They watched as Jack struggled to draw breath.
They watched as Sam moved him to the machine.
They watched as his body arched in pain as its base molecules were rearranged.
They watched as he was whisked away for treatment.
Then they started breathing again.
It was Daniel who was the first to move.
"Sam?"
She still sat in the middle of the floor, staring at her hands. The eyes she turned towards him stared up in shocked anguish. She had green on her clothes, and in her hair, speckles were scattered all over her face.
She held up her green covered hands in mute supplication, her face crumpling.
He was down beside her in a moment. He held her as the soldier shattered, and the anguished woman beneath sobbed her heart out on his shoulder.
*********
He woke.
Again.
And again he was surprised. This time he really thought he had done it.
But no, he was awake.
Infirmary? He listened for the familiar beeps and the click of heels on concrete. Nothing. Not infirmary.
Crap.
He was finding that he was really beginning to miss those normally annoying sounds.
Double check. Open one eye.
No infirmary ceiling. No pen light-
"Oh, crap, Doc. Did you have to do that?" He now had a bright sunspot in one eye and not the other. It made for a very interesting sense of sight.
"Sorry, Colonel, I didn't realise you were awake." The look was innocent, but he had his suspicions. "How are you feeling?"
"I hadn't got that far yet."
She smiled, so he knew he couldn't be that bad. In fact he felt rather good considering. He was tired, yes, but in no pain.
He tried to sit up.
Whoa! The world began to spin. Round and round and round and round and...oh, migod...
Janet had the bucket ready for him.
Just as well.
He lay back down and waited for the world to stop spinning, eyes tightly closed. When it had calmed down somewhat, he daringly opened one eye. The world stayed put. The other eye...yep, seems safe.
He looked directly at Janet.
"Well, what do you expect, Colonel? The Asgard may be gods, but they are not miracle workers. The condition you were in challenged the medical team to their limits. If it wasn't for their cloning technology, you wouldn't be here?"
"Cloning?"
"A good deal of blood and tissue replacement was required." She sighed. "You couldn't be satisfied by pushing the SGC medical team to the limits, no, you had to go out and challenge an Asgard team as well."
He wasn't listening to her anymore.
He was staring at his hands.
"I'm not green."
"I always said you weren't."
"Thor!" The small alien walked in through the open door. Hmm, no flashy beaming thingy, perhaps you could teach an old alien new tricks.
He was almost blinded by the abrupt glare of a transporter.
Damn.
He was still blinking away sunspots from his optical nerve when he heard Carter say, "You know, I could get used to this."
Oh, great, now she would want to take one home with her.
Then it clicked.
"Sam?" He tried to sit up again, but was halted as the world gave a sudden lurch. "Oh, god." He squeezed his eyes shut, begging himself not to throw up in front of his team.
His stomach tipped, teetered, and righted itself. Okay, O'Neill, I know you are a little thick sometimes, but twice is enough - don't move!
He went through the open one eye first routine, and was presented by a hovering Carter. Daniel and Teal'c floated in the background.
"Colonel?"
"Hi, Carter, uh, where you been?" He could finally see straight again. He cleared his throat as his voice cracked. "We thought we had lost you."
He could see his expression reflected in her eyes, and tried to school his features into one of polite concern. He didn't entirely succeed.
"It was Frere, sir. Stunned me on board the 'O'Neill'. I woke up in Loki's laboratory. Thanks go to Thor again, I believe."
He turned to Thor. "Saved the day again, huh? Getting kind of a habit, isn't it?"
Thor bowed. "One I am glad to continue."
"So everyone okay?" There were a bunch of nods, and a head bow from Teal'c.
"With the exception of yourself, Colonel." He knew Janet would mention that somewhere along the line. He gave her a dirty look. "Before you say it, sir. No, you are not fine. It is going to take awhile for you to fully recover from this one."
"So what's wrong with me?" He added a dramatic sigh to that statement.
"Nothing serious, but - No, Colonel let me finish - your body has been through an incredible amount of upheaval. It will take quite awhile for it to readjust. And as you have just demonstrated for yourself, it will tell you when it has had enough. I advise you to listen to it."
"But, Doc, I feel f-" Her glare cut him off. "Okay, okay. I do feel a little tired, but I'm sure I'll be up and around in no time." He grinned his most charming smile.
There was a snicker, suspiciously from the direction of Thor. Jack glared at him. The Asgard stared back innocently.
It was a plot, he was sure of it.
Janet continued. "When you feel up to it, Thor has given us access to the hoverchair again." Jack saw Daniel roll his eyes.
Hmm, a pre-emptive strike might be called for here.
"Don't worry, Danny. If you are a good boy, I'll let you have a turn."
Daniel just glared at him. Sam laughed.
Yep, definitely a plot.
They were interrupted by an Asgard entering the room to give Thor some information. Jack's eyes tracked over the healing sores on the aide's forehead, and he abruptly sobered.
The aide noticed his stare and turned away, embarrassed.
Aw, hell.
"Thor, care to introduce us?"
"Certainly, O'Neill, this is my new aide, Tala."
Jack carefully raised himself on an elbow, daring the world to wobble, and held out a hand. "Pleased to meet you, Tala."
Tala hesitated. Thor said something in Asgard. Tala shook his head and looked at his feet. Thor repeated his command, his voice becoming firm.
Jack let his arm drop. "Don't worry, Thor, I understand." He paused, and then addressed the trembling Asgard. "Tala, I want you to know that I am truly sorry about what has happened to you and your people. If I could reverse it I would." His voice cracked, and he cleared his throat. "I am so sorry."
The aide wouldn't look at him, but bowed his head before looking askance at Thor. Thor dismissed him.
"I am sorry, O'Neill, I-"
"Thor, not a problem. He has a right to feel that way." He swallowed. He wanted to deny it, but it had hurt. From adoration to fear was a steep slope.
"Jack, it wasn't your fault-"
O'Neill cut him off. "Thor, have they found a cure yet?"
"Yes, Tala is one of the first recovered."
"Thank god." He lay back down. He wanted to ask about the statistics, but part of him felt he would shrivel up and die if he added one more name to the list of his dead.
"Jack-"
"Daniel." He cut him off. He knew Daniel meant well, but he would rather handle it his own way. "I'm fine."
Daniel shut up, but his expression was caught between annoyance and worry. Jack couldn't reassure him any further without betraying his own feelings on the matter. And he wanted no-one to see those.
It hurt too much.
So he kept up the banter, casting out jokes, making silly comments, stirring the pot, so hopefully no-one would notice.
But, of course, they did.
And they worried.
**********
When Thor left O'Neill to his friends, the first place he went was back to his office to find Tala. He could understand the man's reluctance to speak to O'Neill, but he had no excuse for such rudeness.
It was such a relief to know O'Neill was going to recover, albeit slowly. According to the specialists, it was the man's own tenacity that had kept him alive. Thor was not surprised. If there was one thing he had learned about the human, it was his capacity to be as stubborn as an Acaran Griplock Crab.
And it served him well.
Thor was heading the investigation into Frere's actions. He trusted the task to no-one else. It was yet to be discovered if he had worked alone with Loki, or whether his sentiments ran deeper into their society and government. Thor was rapidly beginning to suspect the latter.
How else could his plan have gone so smoothly.
Tala was at his desk, scanning through a holographic readout.
"Tala, I sympathise with your feelings, however, that display was offensive towards the humans."
The younger Asgard looked down at his fingers. "I apologise, Commander Thor, but I could not talk to the alien."
"Tala, Colonel O'Neill is not at fault here. He was as much a victim in these circumstances as we."
The aide did not look at him. "Yes, sir."
Thor sighed. It would take quite awhile for relations between the two races to repair themselves. He would certainly do his best to assist those repairs.
Many Asgard had become too complacent about their superiority. Even with the replicator threat, they had been far too confident, and it had almost led to their downfall.
The humans provided a fresh perspective. They were a young and vibrant race, eager to make their way in the universe. Sure they made mistakes, but so did all children. The Nox still considered the humans too young to associate with, but Thor saw a spark in them, one that was very strong in O'Neill, and he felt the Asgard would be stronger with them, than without them.
He suddenly had a thought. Perhaps there was a way to make some progress in a positive direction for both their races.
He opened a comlink to the appropriate person.
**********
The sound of crystal tinkling in the air surrounded him. A soft breeze wafted its way between the plants, sighing when it intertwined with the feathery plant beside him.
It was relaxing.
But he wasn't relaxed.
He had taken to coming here almost daily, to get out of that room, away from his friend's best intentions.
To be alone.
It was here, he could truly think and consider.
He was slowly coming to terms with his role in the epidemic that had shaken this world. His logic centres told him that there had been nothing he could have done. But the part of him that felt, felt deeply, refused to listen.
He mourned them.
He had never set eyes on most of them, but the thought of thousands of Asgard dying in pain, those sores eating them away...it brought tears to his eyes.
And he wasn't a crying man.
And he couldn't let anyone see.
So he came here alone.
Of course, it was an illusion of solitude. Thor had argued and argued with him about security concerns. The little guy had been almost apoplectic when he found that O'Neill had gone to the Garden by himself the first time.
So there were guards. He couldn't see them, but they were there. After all, Thor is Supreme Commander of the Asgard Fleet, what could a lowly Colonel say to refuse him?
He didn't know, but he had certainly tried.
The breeze brought the soft sounds of Asgard talking in the distance. It was a melodious language, and one O'Neill had been seriously considering attempting to learn. He had even spoken to Thor about it. Consequently, he had a whole pile of Asgard literary printouts hidden in his pack where prying archeologists couldn't find them.
But he hadn't touched them since the plague.
What Asgard would want to speak to him now?
He sighed and began to move himself and the hoverchair to a new location, to leave these people in peace.
A voice, speaking in English, stopped him.
"What are you doing here?"
It was followed by an urgent soft voice in Asgard.
O'Neill fiddled with the chair's controls, finally turning the gadget around.
Two Asgard stood on the path. One was staring at him, belligerently. The other was desperately trying to shush the first.
"No, Isha, I want to talk to the alien." The first Asgard walked directly up to O'Neill, his eyes level with the seated human's. "I want to see the cause of all this death."
The Asgard was small, but he radiated hostility. O'Neill was wary, fully aware that his self defense capabilities were still seriously compromised by his weakness. Having seen Thor in action, he knew the Asgard's apparent frailty of body structure was not indicative of their physical capabilities. He heard the rustle of plants as his four armed guards materialised out of the foliage.
The first Asgard looked at the escort with apparent unconcern. "Don't worry, human. I don't intend to hurt you. I just want some answers."
O'Neill swallowed, and steeled himself. "What can I do for you?"
"Apart from leave, and never return?"
O'Neill chose to ignore that.
"Well, human, you can start by telling me why six of my family members had to die."
Six? The thought was inconceivable. Almost.
O'Neill shut his eyes.
"What, human? Don't like the number? How about a description? Should I describe to you their last moments? Will that make you leave?"
O'Neill raised a hand. "Look, I know-"
"Know? What could you possibly know? You wander out into the galaxy, knowing not what you do. And when you do damage, you have no way of repairing it. This time you have left death in your wake. Does it feel good?"
"I would never intend-"
"Intentions are irrelevant. My family is dead."
O'Neill opened his mouth again, but was once again denied the opportunity to say anything.
"Leave us, human. Get off our planet, and go home while you still can." The Asgard turned and stalked off.
Jack's eyes tracked him until he disappeared around a corner of the path. The second Asgard stood staring at him awkwardly. "Sir," he said. "Please forgive, Anwah, he is not himself."
Jack looked at his feet, his hands twiddling helplessly in his lap, before looking up. His voice was quiet. "Please tell him that I am so sorry for his loss, and if there is anything I can do for him, or his family, he only has to ask."
"That is just it, Colonel. There is nothing you or anyone can do." He turned, and followed his friend down the path.
Jack was left by himself, his guards once again amongst the plants.
There was nothing he could do.
Suddenly needing the privacy of his room, he turned off down the path, and headed back.
Lost in thought, he didn't see it until it hit.
**********
Across the other side of the city, Thor was leaving his office.
He didn't see what hit him either.
**********
FIN
Part 11 of The Asgard Sequence
Sequel to 'Only Shooting Stars'
By Gumnut
Sep 2003
Sam chose to be inside the isolation field when he materialized, and it was her who caught him as he crumpled.
The Asgard had supplied her with an antigrav device which enabled her to lower him gently to the waiting platform. They could have levitated him from outside the force field, but she had insisted he would need the comforting presence of touch. In truth, he was probably unconscious, considering the injuries described to her by Thor, so it was really she who needed the comfort.
As his weight appeared in her arms, the first thing she noticed was the green. It was everywhere. He was bleeding through both his nose and mouth, and weeping sores covered all the exposed skin she could see.
At first her heart stopped as his body was still and unresponsive in her hands. Were they too late? But a weak rasping breath saved her. His eyelids fluttered.
He wasn't only alive, he was conscious.
"Colonel?"
His bloodshot eyes opened, wandering across the ceiling, the room, until they latched on to her.
"Sam?" His voice was a bare whisper. "Wha?" His brow crinkled, breaking open a lesion on his forehead. Green blood ran into his eyes.
He blinked rapidly, blinded. "Carter?"
"Colonel, relax - you're safe, and we think we've found a cure for you."
"Carter?" He wrinkled his brow again, anguish written across his face. "I lost you." His eyes blinked again.
He saw her, but he wasn't really seeing her.
She spoke reassuringly. "Sir, the Asgard are going to help you." She hoped desperately she was telling him the truth. She had to blink her own eyes a few times.
She lowered his head on to the platform, lining his body up so that the machine's field would encapsulate him.
Once she had him settled, she stepped back and gave the signal to Loki, who was standing behind the controls with two guards, now accompanied by a hovering Thor.
The genetic manipulator snapped on, its protective field flaring up around the Colonel. His body was lifted, suspended, as the glowing representations of his genetic structure floated in the space around him.
Loki flicked a control and the pattern changed.
Jack, his body suddenly strung tight, gasped a silent scream.
She remembered the pain. She had been whole and healthy at the time. She prayed for him to hold on.
It seemed to go on for hours.
Jack writhed in its grasp.
She turned almost pleadingly to Loki. "Finish it."
"It takes some time, Major Carter, you will have to be patient."
She turned back to O'Neill. Blood still dripped, drifting from his suspended fingertips. He was floating in a haze of his own life fluids.
Come on, come on, come on. She shot another glance at Loki. Thor hovered behind him, a hairsbreath away from taking the controls.
O'Neill gasped again, his eyes wild.
"Loki!" This time it was Thor begging him.
The floating symbols flickered one more time and disappeared.
Carter caught her CO before he could hit the floor. It rained green.
The body was very still, its silence terrifying.
It drew in a sudden ragged breath, as that stubborn Irish O'Neill determination refused to give up. She thanked the nearest deity for his strength.
Speaking of deities...
She was almost blinded by the decontamination flashes throughout the area protected by the isolation field. Now the colonel had been negated as the source of the disease, the Asgard could finally remove the pathogen from the immediate area and treat him.
Suddenly, she was surrounded by efficient grey bodies. Jack was taken from her hands and whisked off into the bowels of the medical section.
She was left, sitting, staring at her green covered hands in the middle of the med room floor.
*********
Daniel was startled as the walls of an Asgard ship suddenly replaced grey concrete.
Spinning around he located his teammates. The look of horror on Janet's face set him spinning back again.
His eyes landed on Sam.
Sam! Oh, thank god!
But it was the body in her arms that brought his heart to a screaming halt.
Jack?
Oh, god, Jack.
As one the three ex-cellmates moved to the flickering isolation field and watched the drama unfold.
They watched as Jack struggled to draw breath.
They watched as Sam moved him to the machine.
They watched as his body arched in pain as its base molecules were rearranged.
They watched as he was whisked away for treatment.
Then they started breathing again.
It was Daniel who was the first to move.
"Sam?"
She still sat in the middle of the floor, staring at her hands. The eyes she turned towards him stared up in shocked anguish. She had green on her clothes, and in her hair, speckles were scattered all over her face.
She held up her green covered hands in mute supplication, her face crumpling.
He was down beside her in a moment. He held her as the soldier shattered, and the anguished woman beneath sobbed her heart out on his shoulder.
*********
He woke.
Again.
And again he was surprised. This time he really thought he had done it.
But no, he was awake.
Infirmary? He listened for the familiar beeps and the click of heels on concrete. Nothing. Not infirmary.
Crap.
He was finding that he was really beginning to miss those normally annoying sounds.
Double check. Open one eye.
No infirmary ceiling. No pen light-
"Oh, crap, Doc. Did you have to do that?" He now had a bright sunspot in one eye and not the other. It made for a very interesting sense of sight.
"Sorry, Colonel, I didn't realise you were awake." The look was innocent, but he had his suspicions. "How are you feeling?"
"I hadn't got that far yet."
She smiled, so he knew he couldn't be that bad. In fact he felt rather good considering. He was tired, yes, but in no pain.
He tried to sit up.
Whoa! The world began to spin. Round and round and round and round and...oh, migod...
Janet had the bucket ready for him.
Just as well.
He lay back down and waited for the world to stop spinning, eyes tightly closed. When it had calmed down somewhat, he daringly opened one eye. The world stayed put. The other eye...yep, seems safe.
He looked directly at Janet.
"Well, what do you expect, Colonel? The Asgard may be gods, but they are not miracle workers. The condition you were in challenged the medical team to their limits. If it wasn't for their cloning technology, you wouldn't be here?"
"Cloning?"
"A good deal of blood and tissue replacement was required." She sighed. "You couldn't be satisfied by pushing the SGC medical team to the limits, no, you had to go out and challenge an Asgard team as well."
He wasn't listening to her anymore.
He was staring at his hands.
"I'm not green."
"I always said you weren't."
"Thor!" The small alien walked in through the open door. Hmm, no flashy beaming thingy, perhaps you could teach an old alien new tricks.
He was almost blinded by the abrupt glare of a transporter.
Damn.
He was still blinking away sunspots from his optical nerve when he heard Carter say, "You know, I could get used to this."
Oh, great, now she would want to take one home with her.
Then it clicked.
"Sam?" He tried to sit up again, but was halted as the world gave a sudden lurch. "Oh, god." He squeezed his eyes shut, begging himself not to throw up in front of his team.
His stomach tipped, teetered, and righted itself. Okay, O'Neill, I know you are a little thick sometimes, but twice is enough - don't move!
He went through the open one eye first routine, and was presented by a hovering Carter. Daniel and Teal'c floated in the background.
"Colonel?"
"Hi, Carter, uh, where you been?" He could finally see straight again. He cleared his throat as his voice cracked. "We thought we had lost you."
He could see his expression reflected in her eyes, and tried to school his features into one of polite concern. He didn't entirely succeed.
"It was Frere, sir. Stunned me on board the 'O'Neill'. I woke up in Loki's laboratory. Thanks go to Thor again, I believe."
He turned to Thor. "Saved the day again, huh? Getting kind of a habit, isn't it?"
Thor bowed. "One I am glad to continue."
"So everyone okay?" There were a bunch of nods, and a head bow from Teal'c.
"With the exception of yourself, Colonel." He knew Janet would mention that somewhere along the line. He gave her a dirty look. "Before you say it, sir. No, you are not fine. It is going to take awhile for you to fully recover from this one."
"So what's wrong with me?" He added a dramatic sigh to that statement.
"Nothing serious, but - No, Colonel let me finish - your body has been through an incredible amount of upheaval. It will take quite awhile for it to readjust. And as you have just demonstrated for yourself, it will tell you when it has had enough. I advise you to listen to it."
"But, Doc, I feel f-" Her glare cut him off. "Okay, okay. I do feel a little tired, but I'm sure I'll be up and around in no time." He grinned his most charming smile.
There was a snicker, suspiciously from the direction of Thor. Jack glared at him. The Asgard stared back innocently.
It was a plot, he was sure of it.
Janet continued. "When you feel up to it, Thor has given us access to the hoverchair again." Jack saw Daniel roll his eyes.
Hmm, a pre-emptive strike might be called for here.
"Don't worry, Danny. If you are a good boy, I'll let you have a turn."
Daniel just glared at him. Sam laughed.
Yep, definitely a plot.
They were interrupted by an Asgard entering the room to give Thor some information. Jack's eyes tracked over the healing sores on the aide's forehead, and he abruptly sobered.
The aide noticed his stare and turned away, embarrassed.
Aw, hell.
"Thor, care to introduce us?"
"Certainly, O'Neill, this is my new aide, Tala."
Jack carefully raised himself on an elbow, daring the world to wobble, and held out a hand. "Pleased to meet you, Tala."
Tala hesitated. Thor said something in Asgard. Tala shook his head and looked at his feet. Thor repeated his command, his voice becoming firm.
Jack let his arm drop. "Don't worry, Thor, I understand." He paused, and then addressed the trembling Asgard. "Tala, I want you to know that I am truly sorry about what has happened to you and your people. If I could reverse it I would." His voice cracked, and he cleared his throat. "I am so sorry."
The aide wouldn't look at him, but bowed his head before looking askance at Thor. Thor dismissed him.
"I am sorry, O'Neill, I-"
"Thor, not a problem. He has a right to feel that way." He swallowed. He wanted to deny it, but it had hurt. From adoration to fear was a steep slope.
"Jack, it wasn't your fault-"
O'Neill cut him off. "Thor, have they found a cure yet?"
"Yes, Tala is one of the first recovered."
"Thank god." He lay back down. He wanted to ask about the statistics, but part of him felt he would shrivel up and die if he added one more name to the list of his dead.
"Jack-"
"Daniel." He cut him off. He knew Daniel meant well, but he would rather handle it his own way. "I'm fine."
Daniel shut up, but his expression was caught between annoyance and worry. Jack couldn't reassure him any further without betraying his own feelings on the matter. And he wanted no-one to see those.
It hurt too much.
So he kept up the banter, casting out jokes, making silly comments, stirring the pot, so hopefully no-one would notice.
But, of course, they did.
And they worried.
**********
When Thor left O'Neill to his friends, the first place he went was back to his office to find Tala. He could understand the man's reluctance to speak to O'Neill, but he had no excuse for such rudeness.
It was such a relief to know O'Neill was going to recover, albeit slowly. According to the specialists, it was the man's own tenacity that had kept him alive. Thor was not surprised. If there was one thing he had learned about the human, it was his capacity to be as stubborn as an Acaran Griplock Crab.
And it served him well.
Thor was heading the investigation into Frere's actions. He trusted the task to no-one else. It was yet to be discovered if he had worked alone with Loki, or whether his sentiments ran deeper into their society and government. Thor was rapidly beginning to suspect the latter.
How else could his plan have gone so smoothly.
Tala was at his desk, scanning through a holographic readout.
"Tala, I sympathise with your feelings, however, that display was offensive towards the humans."
The younger Asgard looked down at his fingers. "I apologise, Commander Thor, but I could not talk to the alien."
"Tala, Colonel O'Neill is not at fault here. He was as much a victim in these circumstances as we."
The aide did not look at him. "Yes, sir."
Thor sighed. It would take quite awhile for relations between the two races to repair themselves. He would certainly do his best to assist those repairs.
Many Asgard had become too complacent about their superiority. Even with the replicator threat, they had been far too confident, and it had almost led to their downfall.
The humans provided a fresh perspective. They were a young and vibrant race, eager to make their way in the universe. Sure they made mistakes, but so did all children. The Nox still considered the humans too young to associate with, but Thor saw a spark in them, one that was very strong in O'Neill, and he felt the Asgard would be stronger with them, than without them.
He suddenly had a thought. Perhaps there was a way to make some progress in a positive direction for both their races.
He opened a comlink to the appropriate person.
**********
The sound of crystal tinkling in the air surrounded him. A soft breeze wafted its way between the plants, sighing when it intertwined with the feathery plant beside him.
It was relaxing.
But he wasn't relaxed.
He had taken to coming here almost daily, to get out of that room, away from his friend's best intentions.
To be alone.
It was here, he could truly think and consider.
He was slowly coming to terms with his role in the epidemic that had shaken this world. His logic centres told him that there had been nothing he could have done. But the part of him that felt, felt deeply, refused to listen.
He mourned them.
He had never set eyes on most of them, but the thought of thousands of Asgard dying in pain, those sores eating them away...it brought tears to his eyes.
And he wasn't a crying man.
And he couldn't let anyone see.
So he came here alone.
Of course, it was an illusion of solitude. Thor had argued and argued with him about security concerns. The little guy had been almost apoplectic when he found that O'Neill had gone to the Garden by himself the first time.
So there were guards. He couldn't see them, but they were there. After all, Thor is Supreme Commander of the Asgard Fleet, what could a lowly Colonel say to refuse him?
He didn't know, but he had certainly tried.
The breeze brought the soft sounds of Asgard talking in the distance. It was a melodious language, and one O'Neill had been seriously considering attempting to learn. He had even spoken to Thor about it. Consequently, he had a whole pile of Asgard literary printouts hidden in his pack where prying archeologists couldn't find them.
But he hadn't touched them since the plague.
What Asgard would want to speak to him now?
He sighed and began to move himself and the hoverchair to a new location, to leave these people in peace.
A voice, speaking in English, stopped him.
"What are you doing here?"
It was followed by an urgent soft voice in Asgard.
O'Neill fiddled with the chair's controls, finally turning the gadget around.
Two Asgard stood on the path. One was staring at him, belligerently. The other was desperately trying to shush the first.
"No, Isha, I want to talk to the alien." The first Asgard walked directly up to O'Neill, his eyes level with the seated human's. "I want to see the cause of all this death."
The Asgard was small, but he radiated hostility. O'Neill was wary, fully aware that his self defense capabilities were still seriously compromised by his weakness. Having seen Thor in action, he knew the Asgard's apparent frailty of body structure was not indicative of their physical capabilities. He heard the rustle of plants as his four armed guards materialised out of the foliage.
The first Asgard looked at the escort with apparent unconcern. "Don't worry, human. I don't intend to hurt you. I just want some answers."
O'Neill swallowed, and steeled himself. "What can I do for you?"
"Apart from leave, and never return?"
O'Neill chose to ignore that.
"Well, human, you can start by telling me why six of my family members had to die."
Six? The thought was inconceivable. Almost.
O'Neill shut his eyes.
"What, human? Don't like the number? How about a description? Should I describe to you their last moments? Will that make you leave?"
O'Neill raised a hand. "Look, I know-"
"Know? What could you possibly know? You wander out into the galaxy, knowing not what you do. And when you do damage, you have no way of repairing it. This time you have left death in your wake. Does it feel good?"
"I would never intend-"
"Intentions are irrelevant. My family is dead."
O'Neill opened his mouth again, but was once again denied the opportunity to say anything.
"Leave us, human. Get off our planet, and go home while you still can." The Asgard turned and stalked off.
Jack's eyes tracked him until he disappeared around a corner of the path. The second Asgard stood staring at him awkwardly. "Sir," he said. "Please forgive, Anwah, he is not himself."
Jack looked at his feet, his hands twiddling helplessly in his lap, before looking up. His voice was quiet. "Please tell him that I am so sorry for his loss, and if there is anything I can do for him, or his family, he only has to ask."
"That is just it, Colonel. There is nothing you or anyone can do." He turned, and followed his friend down the path.
Jack was left by himself, his guards once again amongst the plants.
There was nothing he could do.
Suddenly needing the privacy of his room, he turned off down the path, and headed back.
Lost in thought, he didn't see it until it hit.
**********
Across the other side of the city, Thor was leaving his office.
He didn't see what hit him either.
**********
FIN