A/N: By Clar. Again. *WAVES MADLY* I'm here! Does anyone SEE ME?! Hehe. By the way, sorry all Boromir fans... Mweep.
*
So, after a lot of rowing, a lot of splashing, and a lot of "I hate water! Save me Mr. Frodo!" from Sam, they *finally* made it to Amon Hen, kicking and screaming they went. Dragging the boats on shore, they dropped onto the shore, breathless. After a while, they settled in. Lara leaned against a rock wall, loading, reloading, unloading, then reloading her gun out of boredom. Alex was sitting with Merry and Pippin, trying to barter back his shirt with Sam's frying pan. Aragorn stood up, looking to the Eastern shore.
'We cross at nightfall, hide the boats, then continue by foot. We approach Mordor by the north.'
Gimli immediately stood up and started to tell him off, which in Lara's opinion, was not a good idea, fact being he reached about Aragorn's waist. She watched, amused.
Oh? Just a simple matter of finding our way across Emyn Muil, an impassable labyrinth of razor sharp rocks! And then it gets even better! Festering, stinking marshlands as far as the eye can see!'
The hobbits, plus Alex, immediately looked up, pale. On *foot*? Stinking *marsh*? Where were they going to *cook*? Aragorn looked icily at Gimli.
'That is our road, sir *Dwarf*. I suggest you take some rest and recover your *strength*.'
Gimli looked as if Aragorn had just told him to put on some mascara. Lara smirked. If it were an RPG, Gimli would have 18 strength, no intelligence, -20 wisdom while Con and Dex would be non existent. (Sorry to those non-gamers out there.) Legolas moved over the Aragorn, wearing that same solemn danger-is-near-I-can-feel-it look on his face. He looked out at the Eastern Shore.
'We should leave now.'
Aragorn looked out as well, before facing the elf.
'No. Orcs patrol the eastern shore. We must wait for the cover of darkness.'
'It is not the eastern shore that worries me. A shadow and a threat has been growing in my mind. Something draws near, I can feel it.'
How the hell the elf could feel it was beyond Lara. Abruptly, Sam looked up from his spot on the floor.
'Where's Frodo?'
Boromir's shield lay abandoned on the floor.
Shit. Ring Idiot's in for it now.
*
Frodo, walking in the forest, comes across Boromir, who was carrying a pile of firewood. *WET* firewood.
'None of us should wander alone, you least of all. So much depends on you. Frodo? I know why you seek solitude. You suffer, I see it day by day. Be sure you do not suffer needlessly. There are other ways, Frodo, other paths we might take.'
Frodo circled him warily.
'I know what you would say, and it would seem like wisdom, but for the warning in my heart.'
'Warning? Against what? They are all afraid, but to let that fear drive us to destroy what hope we have... Don't you see? It's madness!'
'There is no other way.'
Frodo now backed away steadily. Boromir approached, hands up and palms showing.
'Why do you recoil? I am no thief!'
Frodo Thinking: My foot. My fat hairy ugly foot.
'You are not yourself!'
'I ask only for the strength to defend my people! If you would only *LEND* me the Ring!'
'NO!'
'What chance do you think you have? They will find you, they will take the ring, and you will beg for death before the end! It is not yours save by a happenstance. It could have been mine. It should have been mine! Give it to me!'
'EAT MY FOOT!'
Boromir pounced on Frodo.
'I retract that sentence! Gerrof, you lured idiot!'
Putting on the Ring, Frodo kicked Boromir in the gut and ran like mad. Running, running, he made it to the High Seat of Amon Hen, looks East, sees the eye and promptly falls off. How he did not break his neck is beyond me. Moving on. Aragorn came running but Frodo backed away like a scared chicken. Which he is, just personified.
'Frodo?'
'It's Boromir. It has taken Boromir.'
'Where is the Ring?'
'Stay away!'
More chickeness from our dear Ring Bearer, Frodo.
'Frodo? I swore to protect you?'
'But can you protect me from yourself? Would you destroy it?'
Frodo held out the Ring. Aragorn gave him a look that clearly meant "What-do-you-want-me-to-do-stab-myself-with-Anduril-?". He moved closer. And closer. Frodo moved further. And further.
How on Middle Earth does he expect me to prove that I won't take the Ring when he keeps on moving away?!
Finally, Aragorn closed Frodo's hand and he breathed a sigh.
'I would have gone with you to the end, to the very fires of Mordor.'
'I know. Look after Sam. I don't think anyone else will be able to stand his talk of tulips.'
Perking up suddenly, Aragorn withdrew his sword. Frodo took out Sting, which glowed bright blue.
'RUN!'
Aragorn starts chopping up orcs. Gunshots can suddenly be heard. Gimli, Legolas and Lara burst in to the scene just as Aragorn jumped off the High Seat and shouted,
'ELENDIL!'
Legolas shot an arrow, and shouted,
'Stupid orc! Stupid, hairless, unplauged by Lara orc!'
Talk about venting one's anger...
*
Merry and Pippin watched Frodo flee, Frodo hid behind a large tree, and looked at them pleadingly. Pippin glanced over at Merry.
'What's he doing?'
'He's leaving!'
Suddenly, a stream of orcs came pounding over. They did not really like the sound of that mad human shooting weird sounds in the air. Merry and Pippin jumped out. Frodo chickened off again.
'Oi! You! Over here!'
And they ran. Like hell. The orcs ran after them.
'Ahhhhhhh! It's working!'
'I KNOW it's working! RUN!'
Then, Boromir, Glorious-Unredeemed-Hero jumps in, sword in hand and horn in mouth, blowing madly as he hacked *cough* slashed and practically shredded up orcs. Aragorn and the rest soon heard the horn, hacking, kicking, stabbing, shooting, banging, clashing and everything, they move towards them. Legolas stops to shoot the hell out of three orcs while Lara stops to blow some up with a convenient grenade gifted by her Little Voice. Back at Boromir, a nice Uruk Hai was shooting him to death.
Shot one.
Suddenly, Gimli jumped in Super hero style. Lara pulled him away just as the arrow struck.
'Don't interrupt!'
Thunk. Rise. Hack.
Shot Two.
Thunk. Rise. Hack.
Shot Three.
Thunk. Rise. Drop. Fall.
He shoots, he scores!
Aragorn got his head stuck to a tree by a shield of the Uruk Hai after some prolonged lanking over before sliding down at the last minute and beheading it. He looked at it in disgust.
'I hate shields.'
Jumping over to Boromir, he dropped to his knees.
'They took the little ones!'
'Stay still.'
'Frodo. Where is Frodo?'
'I let him go.'
Also putting on a fake smile, Boromir answered.
'Then you did what I could not. I tried to take it from him.'
'It.is.beyond.our.reach.now.'
'Forgive.me.I.have.'
Boromir had to forcefully choke out the last word, the smile forcefully painted on.
'failed.you.all.'
'No. You-y- fought. Bravely. You kept your... Honour.'
Aragorn walk practically regurgitating the words. Aragorn then tried to take out the arrow, but the Ever Valiant Boromir stopped him. Aragorn leaned further on the arrow, since Boromir refused to let him take it out. An insult to his healing skills did not go unnoticed.
'Leave it. It is over. The world of men will fail, and my city into ruin.'
Commanding himself to look at Boromir, Aragorn coughed out,
'I do not know what strength is in my blood, but I swear to you I will not let the White City fall, nor our... people.'
So I can rule it.
Boromir clenched his teeth, forcing himself to speak in his dying moments,
'OUR PEOPLE. Our PEOPLE.'
Boromir reached for his sword. He would not die without it. Following the Book, however, the sword was meant to be broken. Cut the scene to Legolas, Gimli and Lara quickly patching it up with Super Glue, quarrelling over which shard fitted where. Cut back to scene. Aragorn passed the man the sword. Smiling, Boromir coughed out.
'I would have followed you, my brother,'
There, Boromir pretended to cough, but secretly said,
'MY ASS,'
'my captain,'
'My ass,'
'My... King.'
'MY ASS!'
He then died. Aragorn leaned as hard as he could on the arrows.
'Be at peace Son of Gondor.'
My FOOT!