James's endless tossing and turning woke Lily up the next morning. She glanced at her clock after blinking the sleep out of her eyes. It was six am. She squinted as sunlight from the window washed over her. As soon as Lily sat up pain shot threw her head. She rubbed her temples gingerly, remembering how horrible of a sleep she had. Dreams had filled the night. Bits and pieces of her future and past nothing that made sense, she let out a sigh, grabbing her wand from her bedside table. She pointed it at her bed and muttered a spell. Instantly the bed was nicely made. She locked her door, and pulled off her pajamas replacing them with her housecoat. She put her wand in its pocket before she padded softly across her living room and paused in front of James's open door. He was lying face down on his bed snoring peacefully. She frowned at the bitter memory of the night before and finished making her way to the vast bathroom. She closed the door behind her smiling at the white tiled bathroom before her. The tub was more like a swimming pool filled with deep blue water. She slipped off her housecoat and hung it on a nearby hook. The walls were lined with various shampoos and soaps; some promising longer hair, everlasting freshness, or a new hairstyle after each use. There was a shelf full of very fluffy warm towels. Lily sat down at the edge of the pool and dipped her wriggling toes. She pulled back and the feel of the cold water. She reached up into her housecoat and pulled out her wand. She touched its tip to the water, and without even saying a spell the water turned the perfect temperature. She let herself fall in leaving her wand at the side. It was wonderful. She smiled thoughtfully, grabbed her wand and touched its tip to the water again. Bubbles foamed up all around her producing the sweet smell of vanilla as she bathed herself happily.

James turned over groaning. Why couldn't he just sleep? It seemed his mind hadn't stopped going after last nights kiss. All he could think and dream about was Lily and her soft pale lips, gorgeous green eyes and ravishing red hair. He threw himself onto his back and stole a glance at his clock. It was almost seven and if he wanted to eat breakfast he'd better get up. He pulled himself to his feet yawning and glancing out the window. He had quidditch practice tonight and was keen to know what the conditions were going to be like. He pulled on a t-shirt and rubbed his eyes as he walked out into the bright living room door. A sweet voice filled the silence, and James looked at the closed bathroom door. He smiled and walked over. He knocked softly.

"Evans," he called, when there was no response he knocked again.

"Just a minute!" he heard her call crossly.

After a few moments of shuffling, the door opened revealing Lily standing infront of him, draped in a light pink housecoat and towel drying her hair hastily. He stared hungrilly at her plush lips and rosy cheeks. The housecoat was crossed in the front revealing the small valley between Lily's breasts to him.

"Yes?" she asked after a moment of James staring at her, her damp red locks falling about her face.

"Oh, I was just hoping to use the bathroom," he smiled.

She caught his eyes for a moment and then pursed her lips brushing past him silently. He entered the bathroom, but retreated slowly calling after her.

"Hey Evans!"

She turned around, still rubbing the towel through her hair.

"About last night, that kiss..." he trailed off thinking of it.

"Was a mistake," she finished for him.

"What do you mean it was a mistake, it was amazing!" he asked flabbergasted.

"James," she shook her head, "It was nothing, I just felt this sudden urge of compassion towards you because I don't have a family and neither do you,"

"I know there was more than compassion on the other end of that kiss Evans, I could feel it in you. Do you not understand, I know that we are meant to be together, I've known that since the day I laid eyes on you. I told Remus, I thought you were the most beautiful thing in the world,"

Lily snickered,

"Not just physically, you, god there's just something about you, about the way you think, you are soo intriguing, a thousand kind thoughts can be written on your face when you are silent." James whispered stepping towards her and taking her hand, "I was a jerk when we were younger, and I know that now, and I thought I'd given up, but I can't forget what happened last night, I can't give up on my heart,"

"It's not that I don't care for you James," Lily replied looking down,

"Then what's the big god damned deal?" James cried.

"I love somebody else," she said pulling her hand from his and turning back to her door, "I think I will go tell Dumbledore about our idea for the Hogsmede trip this weekend," she said hastily.

"Its Sirius isn't it?" James asked as she entered her room, "I told you I've seen the way you look at him,"

She ignored him.

"Why do you like him Evans, he's no good for you!" James spat.

"See you in transfigurations Potter," Lily whispered back.

James groaned loudly, and went back into the washroom slamming the door loudly.

When Lily made her way to Dumbledore's office, the Headmaster was pleased to see her.

"I'm assuming it all went well Miss Evans?" He smiled at her as she approached him.

"You know?" Lily asked.

"Of course," Dumbledore smiled, "So what can I do for you?"

"James and I wish to suggest we have a Hogsmede trip this first weekend back." Lily said to him, sitting in the same chair she'd sat in nights ago when her life still kinda made sense.

"I see," he said peering at her, "I suppose that will be fine,"

Lily closed her eyes, "Thank you, that's all I needed."

"Don't do it again Lily," Dumbledore warned.

"Do what?" She asked.

He smiled softly, "Lily, please don't use James to open your mind to Sirius again."

Lily frowned, "I miss him, you can't expect me to just forget about Sirius and love James with all my heart Professor,"

"I don't expect that of you, I just hope that you are trying," Dumbledore replied.

Lily looked at him disgusted.

"I know what I ask of you is a lot Lily,"

"You don't know anything," she sneered angry at him for making her do what she had done.

"I am so proud of you for the choice you made Lily, very honorable, and I know this can't be easy, but we are pressed for time," he pushed a new publication of The Daily Prophet at her.

The headline read, "Thirteen Muggles and Four Wizards Latter, The Dark Lord gains power."

Lily looked up at Dumbledore uncertainly.

"A memory small or large, can never truly be erased from ones mind, it is only hidden from them. Every time you open your mind to Sirius as you did last night, it lets him see more of that hidden memory. If you keep doing that he will eventually remember Lily and we will have a crisis."

Lily nodded, her heart sinking.

"Is that all?" She said quietly.

"You may go if that is what you are asking,"

Lily got up and threw the newspaper back onto the Headmasters desk, anger rising in her cheeks.

She left his office in a furry.

The week passed and the Hogsmede weekend came. Lily was feeling more lonely then she'd ever felt as she lead the new third years across the field into Hogsmede. James was laughing loudly with one of the third years who was on his quidditch team. She hurried ahead of James aware of his penetrating eyes and pleading stares. Once in Hogsmede she made her way to the bookstore. While searching for a new Charms book she'd read about in the Daily Prophet she glanced out the window to see Remus, James, Peter and Sirius standing outside of Zonkos Jokeshop that was just across the dusty street. Leaves from the nearby trees blew around them as they laughed together. Suddenly Lily noticed Mirinda Mincent walking towards the boys swaying her him which were covered by an extremely short skirt. She let herself brush past each boy promiscuously before settling in front of Sirius. Lily watched as he smiled devilishly lowering his lips onto hers. In front of her stood the Sirius she didn't know, the Sirius she'd felt she'd created when shed sent him back in time. Lily felt her throat choke as she watched her boyfriend kiss someone else so meaningfully. James caught her eyes through the window and she stepped away looking horrified. She stepped back into the aisle knowing he was going to come approach her. She busied herself with her book. She heard the front door bells of the store jingle as someone entered. His footsteps were slow as he walked towards her. She looked down at his dusty black uniform shoes. She closed her eyes slowly.

"Why do you care for him Evans?" James asked.

"Why do you care?" Lily spat back looking up at him and hugging her book to her chest.

"I care for you," he said honestly, his hazel eyes twinkling.

"Oh go away Potter," Lily snapped brushing past him towards the cash register.

"Evans," he called grabbing her hand as she fled.

"Do you ever give up?" she cried strangling to pull her hand from his grip.

"No, I wont!" James said grabbing the book from her other hand and placing it on the counter," we are meant to be with each other,"

She looked up at him with reproachful eyes, feeling the longing in her body as he stood before her his eyes narrowed in determination.

"Deal with it Potter," she said quietly not breaking her eyes from his.

"But you care for me," he said hold her other hand.

Lily felt her heart beating fast, knowing it was true, knowing she wanted to betray Sirius, knowing she wanted to let go of him. She closed her eyes and let out a slow shuddery breath.

"I love him," she whispered, telling herself more than James.

"How can you love him?" he asked pulling her close and staring at her so meaningfully, Lily could feel her heart leap. She stared into his hazel eyes feeling herself roll up onto her toes inching towards his face slowly. James closed his eyes, moving his arms around her waist.

The bells of the door jingled causing the two to jump apart.

"Hey Prongs!" Sirius cried, he paused glancing at Lily and James standing infront of him. James stared at the floor, where as Lily looked like a deer caught in the head lights. She grabbed the counter for support as she faltered for a moment and the let a trembling hand raise to her mouth as she stared at him. Sirius admitted as he stared back at her, that he felt a pang of guilt pulse through him as he thought of the dream he had had. She let out a tiny gasp, and then fled from the store. Sirius looked at James for the answer but he pushed him out of the way and dashed after her.

"Evans!" James called after her as she ran down the step onto the dusty streets of Hogsmede, "We need to talk about this!"

"About what?" She cried spinning around on him.

"Our relationship,"

"Our relationship," she cried savagely into the wind, not noticing the people in the streets who were staring at her, "Is simple, you are Head Boy, I am Head Girl, sure we have to live in the same common house, see each other lots but that's IT!"

"Why?!" James cried confused. Hadn't she just about kissed him?

"I will see you at midnight for our rounds of the school," she said curtly walking away from him as she spotted Alice, Favia and Jill a little way down the road.

James and Lily didn't speak for the next week, even during their rounds they remained silent, and James busied himself with Quidditch and his friends at all other times, as Lily sat alonein front of the fire gazing at her homework and thinking of Sirius, James and Voldemort. At the end of the week Dumbledore and the Heads of Houses held a meeting for all prefects and James and Lily. He wanted them to organize a ball that was to be held on Halloween, and Lily gritted her teeth preparing herself for all the extra time she was going to have to spend with James. He smiled at her from across the room. She smiled softly back preparing herself for an interesting month,