Chapter 6
When Luka walked into the ER, he was greeted with silence. Hostile silence.
All the conversations that had been in progress stopped when they saw him. Even the patients seemed to know that something was wrong, and for a few moments they stopped their whining about slow treatment and focused in on him.
"What is he doing here?" he heard someone whisper, but when he turned his head towards the voice, everyone was suddenly busy, rearranging supplies, not meeting his gaze. Does everyone think I'm guilty? he thought despairingly.
He had just gotten his stethoscope out of his locker when Weaver approached him. "Doctor Kovac, I didn't expect to see you back here." Her voice dropped an octave. "The police told me that you had been arrested."
"I got out on bail," Luka said. He tried not to think about the fact that he couldn't find a single person who would come and bail him out, and in the end he had gotten his public defender to get the bail money out of his account. But at least, for now, he was free. And he was going to do whatever he could to find the person who had attacked Abby.
For now, work was probably the only thing that could take his mind off the fact that all his coworkers thought he had attacked Abby. At least the patients wouldn't think he was guilty.
"I didn't think you were going to be here, so I got someone else to cover your shifts."
"Well, I'm here now," Luka said, pulling on his lab coat. He was about to clock in, but Weaver's hand stopped him.
"Luka, we need to talk."
"About what?" Luka asked, fearing that he already knew what.
Weaver looked up at him, her gaze unwavering. "I think that, maybe until this thing is over, you should take some time off."
Luka's face fell in disappointment. "Kerry, I didn't do this. Don't punish me for something I didn't do," he pleaded.
"I never said you did it, Luka, but I don't think it's a good idea for you to be working here while these charges are still hanging over your head." She paused for a moment. "I'm sorry about this. As soon as the charges are dropped, you can come back."
Luka leaned up against his locker. The day had just begun, but he was already exhausted.
So this was it. He had lost his job, his friends, and now, he might even be going to jail for a crime he didn't commit.
His friends. What a joke. These people weren't his friends. They didn't even like him. The second there was any evidence that he might be guilty, they had all turned on him.
But could he really blame them? He had never made any effort to get to know them. True, he wasn't exactly an outgoing person anymore, but he never really made any effort to make friends with these people. When he first got to County, he had turned down offers to go for drinks or lunch until people had stopped offering. He had made in clear that he didn't want to get close to anyone who worked at County.
Except for Abby. Something about her had intrigued him, made him want to know more about her. When they first started dating, he thought that he had found himself a true friend.
But somehow, in didn't work out. They never got around to the telling-each-other-secrets, being-best-friends stage. As much as he hated to admit it, he had never really made a lot of effort to get to know Abby either. She had just been someone to keep the other side of the bed warm, someone to keep him from being alone.
He had shut her out, but that was because it had become a routine for him. Never tell anyone something about you they don't need to know, that had been his philosophy. But he had assumed that, once he and Abby had started dating, they would just automatically move past that stage, grow comfortable with each other, be able to really talk to each other. But that had never happened. And now, Abby's friends, the people at County General, were rallying around her while he was left out in the cold.
Well, he should have expected this. When you don't let people get to know you, what reason do they have to trust you?
But now, as he stood on the outside looking in, he wished he had someone, anyone, who believed in him. Someone who didn't think he was guilty, for the simple reason that they knew he would never do anything like that. But that was impossible; no one knew him like that. Not even Abby. He was the only one who knew what kind of person he was. He was innocent, but no one else believed him.
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"It might be permanent."
"It might not be," Carter countered, but he knew Abby had to be depressed by the neurologist's news. It had been three days since her attack, yet she was still having neurological side effects. Yesterday she had been too dizzy to get out of bed, and her doctor was not wild about the idea of letting her go home.
"I might be like this for the rest of my life," Abby said, her hands resting in her head.
"Is your head still bothering you?" Carter asked.
"Of course," Abby said. "I'm gonna have a headache for the rest of my life," she moaned, depressed. Could things get any worse? First, the boyfriend who she thought loved her had apparently attacked her, and now, it looked like she might be permanently brain damaged. True, the neurologist said it was too soon to tell, but Abby was already imagining what her life would be like if she stayed like this forever. Would she be able to keep her job at County? Probably not; she couldn't be passing out in the middle of traumas. So what would she do? Go and live with Maggie? She knew her coworkers were concerned about her well-being, but she was sure that concern stopped short of the you-can-move-in-with-me-and-I'll-take-care-of-you mark. So what was she going to do?
"Don't give up yet, Abby," Carter encouraged her, breaking into her short and miserable daydream.. "Just give it some time."
"I just want to go home," Abby said quietly. "Is that too much to ask?" Carter wasn't sure how to respond to that.
Just then, Dr. Jennings walked in. "Hello Abby, Carter," said Jennings, who knew both of them from work.
"When can I get out of here?" Abby asked wearily, as if she was already resigned to her fate.
"Actually, I have some good news about that. Your tests are looking better, so this might not be as serious as we originally thought."
"So it's not permanent?" Abby asked quickly.
"We can't be sure yet, but it looks good."
"When can I go home?" Abby asked. She had spent more than enough time at County; now, all she wanted to do was go home and sleep in her own bed.
"Actually, you're in fairly good condition, good enough to go home. But I'm concerned about the symptoms you've been having-"
"They've decreased significantly over the past day," Abby said, trying to sound sincere despite the fact that she was lying. "I'm sure I'll be fine."
Dr. Jennings looked dubious. "Well, Dr. Brent gave me your CTs from yesterday, and it looks like the swelling in your brain has gone down considerably. I'm prepared to discharge you today, but you will have to be on partial bed rest, and I want you to come back in three days for a check-up. Okay?" Abby readily agreed.
After Jennings left, Abby ran around the room gathering her things, humming happily and ignoring Carter's gaze. Finally, she turned to him and said, "What?"
"You lied to him." Carter stated this as fact.
"I had to. I'll be okay. If I start having anymore symptoms, I'll turn myself in," Abby promised, holding up three fingers in a pledge of scout's honor.
"What if you fall down a fight of stairs and bleed to death? It'll be kind of late to turn yourself in then."
The smile slid off Abby's face, and she turned to look at him. "C'mon, Carter, I just wanna get out of this place. I'll take it easy and everything, but I can't stand another day in this place. I'll be okay," she promised him.
"You don't know that," Carter said solemnly. "I'm serious, Abby, this could be dangerous. You can't just be out and about after a serious head injury like this." Carter thought for a moment. "Why don't you come and stay with me?" he suggested.
Abby shook her head. "No, it's okay, I'll be fine."
"You don't know that," Carter pointed out. "Look, if your staying with me, then if, God forbid, something bad happens, you won't be alone," Carter said sincerely. "It's not safe for you to be alone right now."
Abby sighed. "You're probably right," she agreed, not because she wanted to stay with him, but she was suddenly so tired that she just wanted this discussion to be over so she could lay down. She crawled back into the bed and pulled the sheet up to her chin.
"You sure you feel good enough to be leaving the hospital?" Carter asked.
Abby nodded firmly. "I'm ready to get out of here."