Disclaimer; CB still is not mine
Ok, I revised this a bit, hope you like it.
Chapter 8: Trust
Gray water calmly lapped the pale shoreline. A light gust of winded ruffled his seaweed green hair. He shivered and pulled his coat tighter around his lanky frame. It was predawn on the California coastline, the world not quite awake yet. Only a few lonely gulls were skimming low over the ocean hunting for their first meal. Spike had wandered the streets of Tijuana most of the night. He hadn't really wanted to spend any more time in that city after the bar fight, but he had been too drunk to fly, and he wasn't ready to autopilot back to the Bebop. He still had had too much on his mind to face Faye or Jet. So he had walked until he was sober; then flew aimlessly until he had found himself on the northern California coast.
He stared at the colorless seawater surging up the beach, barely reaching the tips of his shoes that were sunk into the wet sand, before receding back to the ocean. The rhythm was so natural, so perfect, one movement flowing into the next. He could stand there forever hypnotized by the ebb and flow of the water. It was so calm and serene, everything he aspired to be but wasn't.
The sunrise was so gradual he hardly noticed until the water was sparkling blue instead of gray. Spike sighed and lit a cigarette as his stomach grumbled, reminding him he'd eaten nothing since he'd left the Bebop the day before. He couldn't avoid her forever. His anger had died somewhere between the bar and sobering up. Faye hadn't done it out of spite, and he knew it. He had known that the second he'd figured out who had sabotaged the Swordfish. But he hadn't been ready to think about her reasons for doing it. He had been too angry to be rational.
"Hmm, maybe she really does care about me," he contemplated.
Or at least she did until yesterday, he thought. The gulls were out in full force, swooping and diving into the glittering ocean. Their calls carried on the rising wind to the shore where Spike stood. The temperature was rapidly rising as the sun climbed higher over the endless blue water. His stomach complained again as he finished his cigarette. Yup, time to go, he decided, flicking the butt into the ocean. He turned and walked back to the Swordfish.
The com was beeping when he climbed into the cockpit. He flipped the switch.
"Yeah, what is it?" he asked as Jet's face appeared on the screen.
"Is Faye with you?" Jet asked. He sounded worried.
"Why would she be with me? Isn't she there?"
"No. Ed said she left early this morning after they had some sorta fight. I thought she might have gone to find you." A frown crossed Jet's face as he rubbed his balding head.
"Well, she didn't," Spike said, trying to sound casual as his heart threatened to jump right out of his chest. What the hell was she thinking?
"Well, all right, um,"
"Jet, what aren't you telling me?" Spike demanded. He knew his friend was hiding something.
Jet sighed, "Ed thinks she went off to kill Vicious."
"What!" he nearly jumped out of his seat.
"I don't think she knows where to find him. Ed refused to help her."
"Good." He still had time to find her before she got herself killed. "Stupid woman!" he muttered.
"What was that, Spike?"
"Nothing. Where do you think she'd start looking?"
"Probably back where it all happened. Track the son-of-a-bitch from there. That's what I'd do if I didn't know where he was hiding."
"Right. I'll look for her there. Call me if you find anything out," he said, turning the com off.
"Stupid woman!" he shouted, banging his fist on the console. How could she be that reckless! Didn't she care about what anyone else had to say?
He switched on the main thrusters and took off in burst of wet sand and exhaust. It was only 40, maybe 50 miles to New San Francisco. He could be there in 15 minutes if he ignored the surface speed limits. His heart was in his throat, anger and fear pushing him to be reckless. He didn't know if he believed in God, but he prayed she was there and in one piece, just in case.
Less than 20 minutes later he was circling the city looking for any sign of the Redtail. Skyscrapers and apartment buildings were massed together. The new city hadn't been planned very well. Warehouses and shopping centers were crammed into the same areas. Further out south were the residential areas. Even the poorest zoning hadn't placed the shanty towns and mansions together. No matter where you are, the rich are always separated from the poor, Spike thought as he flew toward the north end. She wasn't parked in any of the main lots the city had to offer. Paying for parking wouldn't be like Faye. He increased his speed and sped toward the north end of town. It was likely she had started her search back at that bar.
There it was, parked on the edge of town. He heaved a sigh of relief. She was still here. He turned and landed next to the Redtail. Spike noticed the cockpit was empty, not that he'd expected her to be waiting there. That would be too easy.
It was hot. The sun glared mercilessly on compacted dirt and pavement. The occasional Joshua tree and clump of sagebrush were all that grew there. Not many people were out; it was still early, not even eight yet. Finding her shouldn't be too difficult, he thought strolling down the street. Not many places were open and she was on foot. Of course she did have a few hours start on him. No matter, she didn't have many places to go.
Six hours later he still hadn't found her. He had been to every clothing store,
restaurant, grocery store, pretty much everywhere, and not one person had seen
her. Where the hell was she? She wouldn't have gone into the main city on
foot, would she? No, Faye didn't like to
walk that much. She had to be around
there somewhere.
Five o'clock rolled around, and no
trace of Faye. He was tired, hungry, but
mostly worried. Had Vicious already
found her? Please, don't let that be it,
he begged, starting to run back to the Swordfish. He hoped the Redtail was still there.
Every step he ran was a silent plea for her safety. He rounded the last block and stopped, breathing and sweating heavily. Both ships were still parked side by side. He walked up to them, knowing they were both empty, but still half hoping she was there waiting for him. Sometimes he hated being right all the time.
"Shit!" Spike swore, kicking his ship. What next? He could wait there and hope she showed up. Or he could start searching the local bars now that they were close to opening. Knowing Faye, she'd be at the bars trying dig up information. He looked across the street. There was the spot he had found her half dead body weeks ago. Right in front of The Triangle Pony. That's where she would go. He walked towards the shabby building. He needed to eat and relax. Beer and pretzels sounded like a pretty good dinner. He'd wait for her there.
He walked in and sat in a shadowed booth. The matronly bartender was nowhere in sight. Instead, a young blonde man was working the counter.
"Can I help you, sir," a bored Mexican waitress interrupted Spike's thoughts.
'Yeah, I'd like a beer," he said with hardly a glance at her.
She rolled her eyes and sauntered off unhurriedly to get his drink.
He reached into the bowl of pretzels sitting on the table. He was starving. By the time she returned with his beer he had devoured the entire bowl. She scowled at him with dark eyes.
"Anything else?" she asked.
"Yeah. More pretzels," he said, still chewing. He gave her a stupid grin, crumbs falling from his crooked lips.
She grabbed the bowl and walked off in a huff.
He had been nursing his third beer for a good hour. The sun had set a while ago, and the bar was packed. It was Saturday night, just his luck karaoke night; and much to his dismay it was obviously in full swing. One thing that should have died out in the 20th century but didn't. He had watched dozens of men and women walk in and out the swinging door, none of them anyone he was looking for. Where was she?
He didn't think he could take the off key singing of drunk people for much longer. Just then a woman dressed all in black walked in. She looked familiar. It took him a moment to realize it was Faye. She walked to the bar and took a seat. Her eyes were downcast and her red lips turned down into a pretty pout.
"Vodka," she ordered the blonde man, who was blatantly trying to look down her shirt.
Spike frowned, not sure why other men looking at Faye suddenly bothered him. He snuck up behind her.
"Find what you were looking for?" he said softly behind her. He was trying not to sound angry.
She jumped, startled by the sound of his voice. She swiveled around on her stool and glared at him. "What's it to you?" She replied, placing a cigarette between her crimson lips.
He tried not to stare. She was a dark angel. True she'd always been pretty, but now she was different, and it was more than the outfit. It had been a while since he'd seen her all dressed up. The fact that she wasn't only half-dressed made her more attractive.
"Let me guess, big daddy Jet sent you looking for me. Did it ever occur to any of you retards that I don't need to be looked for?" she smirked, taking a drag off her cigarette. "I'm not a baby, ya know."
"You've made your point Faye. Let's go," Spike growled, grabbing her arm and jerking her off the stool.
"Just what the hell do you think you're doing!" she shrieked digging her heals into the wooden planked floor as he dragged her towards the door. "Let go of me, you idiot!"
"Shut up! You're way more trouble than you're worth!" he shouted back as he pulled her outside. His real eye was twitching in anger and underlying relief; he was fighting between smacking her and hugging her.
"Damn you Spike, this is none of you business!"
"I said shut up!" he yelled, pushing her against the wall. His body was pressed against hers, pinning her against the concrete wall. Faye was glaring jade daggers at him, her chin turned up defiantly. Dark red lips curled in contempt, taunting him as he pinned her body against the wall. His breathing was heavy and ragged, his body rigid against hers. He held her unwavering gaze, silently challenging her to defy him.
"Make me!" she hissed, green fire flashing in her eyes.
His grip on her shoulders tightened as he bent over, devouring her mouth with his own. His kiss was hot and urgent. She stiffened for a moment before attacking him with a needy kiss of her own, her tongue invading his mouth. It was nothing like either of them would have expected. There was no gentleness in the act. It was a battle for the upper hand, and both were determined to win.
"You are such an ass," she breathed against his lips, still assaulting them with her own.
"Stupid wench," he growled, nipping her lower lip before nuzzling her smooth white neck.
If he didn't stop he was going to take her right there. He reluctantly pulled away and held her at arms length. She looked at him, desire still glazed over her eyes, but there was confusion underneath.
"What?" she asked, her breath coming in shallow gasps
"Not here," he said, dragging her toward the motel across the street.
She stumbled along behind him, still a little dazed. She had never lost control like that with any other man. Where was he taking her now? She didn't realize what he had in mind until he was pulling through the door and demanding a room.
"Spike?" she asked hesitantly, gathering her wits about her. She knew what he wanted. Anger had been replaced by fear.
"What?" he grinned, taking her hand in his, leading her down the dark hall and up the stairs. He stopped in front of a door, and in a moment had it open.
Faye followed him inside and shut the door behind her.
The room wasn't much to look at. The walls were white except where the cranberry drapes covered the windows. A double bed with a comforter that matched the curtains, a small table, and a dresser with a TV on it were all that furnished the small room. To the left was a door that led, Faye assumed, to the bathroom. She stood unmoving by the door, watching Spike kick his shoes off and throw his blue jacket on the chair. He loosened his tie and turned to look at her. Frowning, he walked toward her.
"Faye, what's wrong," he murmured, stroking her cheek with a fingertip.
She looked at the beige carpet, dark purple hair covering her face. He tilted her chin, forcing her to look at him. Unshed tears glimmered in the green depths of her eyes. She looked like a scared virgin.
He sighed and pulled her close, embracing her in what he hoped was a comforting hug. They had both gotten caught up in the moment outside the bar; Faye had been too angry to be afraid. Now that she'd had time to think, she was scared of him again.
"I'd never hurt you, you know," he whispered, kissing the top of her head.
She simply nodded, not trusting her voice. Her body was stiff as held her. He pulled her to the bed and sat her down, then took his place next to her.
"Tell me what happened Faye."
"I can't."
"You need to talk to someone."
"No, you wouldn't understand. No one would."
He pulled her closer to him, searching her face intently.
"Make me understand," he said softly.
"I don't want to," she whispered desperately.
"Why? Don't you think I know what kind of devil Vicious is? Do you think I blame you for what he did?"
"Yes," she said simply, hanging her head in shame.
"Faye, I know it's not your fault. There was nothing you could do. He used you. You had no choice in it. Don't you get that?"
"Yes."
"Then what's the problem?" he demanded.
She raised her eyes and looked at him miserably. "You don't want me, Spike. Not really. I can never be her."
"Who?"
"Your perfect angel. Julia."
"I don't want you to be Julia. I want you to be Faye."
"But you love her," she said confused.
"No, not anymore," he said gently, leaning forward a little.
She sat there stunned. He had not just said that, had he? Could he possibly want me, she thought. No, he was just after sex, that had to be it. She turned her face away so his lips landed on her cheek instead of her mouth. He peppered her face and neck with light kisses. She sat there like a block of ice.
"I'm not going to let you use me," she whispered vehemently.
He stopped kissing her, and frowned. What was she talking about?
"What do you mean 'use you'? For what? Sex?" he almost laughed. She really didn't get it.
"YES!" she yelled, standing up, her fist balling on her hips.
"Really Faye, if all I wanted was sex, do you really think I would spend my time trying to get into your pants when I could have my pick of willing girls any place I go?" He was laughing now.
"Well, don't we have the over inflated ego! Any place you go! Ha! You wish. You're not as cute as you think you are, Fluffy!" she shouted pushing him backwards.
In a move too quick for her to follow, he grabbed her wrists and pulled her down with him, rolling her underneath his body. He pinned her arms above her head and grinned wickedly.
"Any time, any place."
Faye's heart was pounding. His body pressing against hers was making her nerves tingle. She was aware of every inch of him touching her. Unconsciously she wet her lips with the tip of her pink tongue, leaving her mouth open slightly. That was all the invitation he needed. He plunged his tongue through her parted lips, tasting her. The heat of desire burned inside her and everyplace he touched. She was losing herself in his fiery kisses that had strayed from her mouth down her neck. She groaned in pleasure as his hands started exploring other parts of her. A hand wandered up the inside of her thigh, sending hot shivers through her abdomen. Fingers lightly brushed over her hip, dancing smoothly up her stomach. He stopped just below her breasts. His arm darted under her, lifting her slightly as his hand gripped her shoulder. He pulled the neck of her top open, gingerly planting kisses on her collarbone.
She was losing herself in his touch. They way he looked at her, begging her to trust him. She was surprised to realize that she did. Implicitly. She succumbed to her desire, running her hands down his muscled back until she came to the waist of his pants. In one deft pull she had untucked his shirt and was caressing the skin underneath. She gasped suddenly as his hands followed her example and simply pulled hers off. She was laying under him in nothing but a black satin bra, jeans and boots. She flashed him a sexy smile, pushed him up slightly, and unbuttoned his shirt. If she was going to be topless so was he.
He smiled down at the woman underneath him. She met his gaze evenly, showing herself to him freely for the first time. His heart swelled with elation. She wanted him, trusted him, maybe even needed him. He pulled her up into his arms for a deep, passionate kiss, delighting in her gentle touch. Skin, smooth and pale as a blushing white rose pressed against him. He gasped suddenly as an unexpected hand dipped into the front of his pants, her thumb rubbing the metal button. He felt her smile against his lips. She wanted to play games. Well, Faye, if you insist…
The room was dark. Clothes were scattered across the floor. Spike clutched the sleeping woman to him. She was sprawled on top of him, her arms loosely wrapped around his shoulders. He still couldn't believe it. He replayed their passionate lovemaking over in his head and still couldn't quite believe it had happened. Yet there she was, lying naked in his arms. It had been better than anything he'd ever imagined. She had finally let go and trusted him. A slow, satisfied smile crept upon his lips. He fell asleep a happy man.
The sun had risen and was peeking through the drapes. Spike had been awake since before dawn, thinking. Faye was curled up next to him, smiling still in her sleep. He looked down on her and frowned. She wasn't going to give up hunting down Vicious just because he slept with her. He couldn't let her get killed. He quietly crept out of bed, and dressed. Spike took one last look at the sleeping woman, and walked out the door.
This still isn't the end, but I'm getting there.