Author's notes: This is my first fic. Kaiba recently breaks up with Malik and becomes extremely upset seeking food as a way to stop the pain, except Kaiba starts gaining weight and begins to panic. Oh I excuse myself, I don't mean to offend anyone, I just thought it would have been funny to make fun of Kaiba somehow. Disclaimer: I do not own Yugioh or the characters, they belong to their respectful owner.
Oh and don't be offended or take any of this seriously...some of the solutions in this story are totally unrealistic
FLAB PANIC
Chapter 1: As long as your nice.
Kaiba continued to shoove the ice cream in his mouth, nothing mattered now, his ignornant, psychotic little Egyptian had broken up with him for weeks. Infact, it had been around 28 days. Kaiba simply sat during his little spare time at his mansion sitting on his couch, watching the television through numerous channels. Sometimes, he would spend his time working on the latest duel items but he'd still be munching on something.
"Big brother..." Mokuba suddenly popped up from the back of the couch, "...um..do you have a second?" It had been also 28 days until Mokuba finally had the courage to confront his elder brother who had isolated himself in the mansion.
"What is it, kid?" Seto responded like an automatic phone service and had not even bothered to take a small glance at his little black haired brother. The brunette took a huge gulp from his supersize chocolate milkshake.
"You don't seem to be spending any time with me recently..."
"I'm sorry kid, I'll make up for it tommorrow.."
"Hey,...Seto," Mokuba stated with widened eyes as something about the appearance of his brother seems to have been different but he wasn't sure if he should bring it up.
"What now...?"
"What is that?!" Mokuba suddenly shrieked, pointed at a huge bump on Kaiba's arm. "Hey! They're everywhere!"
"I haven't been myself recently."
"You've gained a lot of weight!"
"No I haven't."
"Look! Look at this thing! It's flab!" The little black haired boy freaked, poking at the flesh that was dangling loose around Kaiba everywhere.
"Whatever, I'm already trying to control it," Kaiba rolled his eyes taking a zip from his beer.
"Controlling it? How?!" Mokuba cried.
"Easy, you see these blue belt like strings I've been wearing since Battle City? They're good for squeezing my fat, making me look slim," the brunnette proudly spoke.
"No they're not, your fat is squeezing around it! It's so gross! It's looks like you've got balls everywhere."
"Muscles...they look like muscles...Mokuba."
"Seto, no one has 3 biceps and triceps on each arm! Or 3 of each muscle everywhere. You need to get a diet."
"Okay!" Seto stammered and stood up, "First off, Mokuba I'm am not getting fat, and second, I'm not wasting my time going on a stupid diet...I'll prove it to you that I'm in check with my weight!"
5 minutes later
"Hmm...it looks like I did gain quite a bit of weight..." Kaiba frowned as the machine read '236 lbs.'
"Well you're not that fat," Mokuba started to comfort his brother after noticing the change in his brother's attitude.
"I'm fat."
"That's okay, as long as your nice."
"Mokuba, be quiet...I'm not even that..."
5 minutes later
The summer break was almost over and he'd have to return to shit ass school again, he was worried, he didn't want any of his rivals to see him look this bad, they'll surely laugh at him. 'Wait a second, since when do I care of what those geeks think of me,' he scowled himself for being to pathetic. Instead, he should try to find ways to look like himself again.
"Let's see," he pondered as he sat on his desk, planning on his diet plan, 'Ryou is the thinnest boy I've ever seen, I wondered what he eats to keep in his shape? Yugi is also very thin.'
An idea hit him.
'Could chockers but the answer? I mean Yugi wears them and all it's probably good for is pushing up all the fat to his head, yeah that must be it! No wonder why he has such a big inflated head!' Kaiba immeadietely wrote down to buy several chockers on his shopping list.
"But what does Bakura do?" Seto pondered as he leaned back into his chair. "He wears stripped shirts..." He recalls of a magazine he happened to glanced at once accidently behind Tea's shoulder who was reading a fashion article. It mentioned that wearing vertical stripes makes a person look slimmer. He quickly scribbles that down too.
"What else..." He knew Jounouchi, Honda, Yugi, and Bakura all had one thing in common. A mid length jacket! 'Wait I have a jacket too! But it dangles to the floor.' He had been complimented a few times of people that said his jacket was cool, it looked like a cape while he walked. 'That's why!' He gasped, 'looking like a huge cape, mean looking huge! I'll have to stop wearing that white jacket for now.' Seto quickly wrote down that he had to get himself a jacket similar to those boys.
Half an hour later
"Ah...my list is set!" The Ceo smirked proudly to himself, he planned to also wear dark colors since they'll help make him look slimmer. He could also give up on the junkfood. He wouldn't risk getting pills or buying those weight loss products. Those things never work and if he would never be full just drinking one weight loss drink, he'll have to drink a few, meaning he'd probably end up gaining more fat then he wanted. He'll have to stick to low fat products, fruits, veggies, and cereal period. Kaiba head out to get what he needed...
3 days later in the park
"Yeah! I won!" Jounouchi exclaimed happily jumping around that for once he actually defeated Yugi.
"Good game," Yugi smiled as he secretly puts away his current hand containing Monster Reborn, Mirror force, Swords of Revealing light, Mind Control and his trusty Dark Magician. He could have easily wiped out Jounouchi's forces with the Mirror force trap then throw in Mind control to snatch away the one monster Jounouchi had in defense position and then Monster Reborn a monster from a graveyard then summon his Dark Magician and won the duel since Jounouchi had no magic or trap cards out on the vanishing field. But he'll let that slip, just for once.
"I can't believe Jounouchi did it!" Anzurejoiced, proud of her friend.
"It's surely amazing," Bakura clapped.
"Man it's noon now, don't you guys think we should grab something to eat," Honda said, rubbing his stomach like the pig he is.
"Yea...I'm starvin'" Jounouchi added.
The gang begin to pack up their picnic at the park and were about to leave when Bakura spotted something. "Hey look guys, that looks like Kaiba."
"Wha? Hey it is...but something looks different about him."
Kaiba froze when he saw the most hated people of his existence staring at him, he orignally planned to just take a jog around the park so it'll help him lose some pounds but he's about to change his mind. He should run away fast! He spun around and jolted but he ran smack into someone then they both fell back on the floor. A ripping sound was heard. The gang then caught up to him.
"Ow, watch it, fat ass!" Ryougi spat before realizing who he had ranted on, "Seto Kaiba!" Ryouji took a brief look over the CEO before concluding..."What the fuck did you do to yourself?!"
Kaiba was wearing a black and white vertically stripped shirt with a black chocker and jeans that appeared too tight on him. He wore several wrist bands and even one on his upper arms. Supposibly the combination of a chocker and wrist bands should look good, but along with his other clothes, Kaiba looked like a fashion disaster. Also because he fell on his ass, his tight jeans ripped from behind, exposing his black thong.
"Why does Kaiba look like that?" Anzu asked in her common bitchy voice.
Kaiba sat up and Anzu inched in closer, he placed his hand on her cheek and with that one hand, shooved her face away. Because of Kaiba's extra weight, Anzu was shooved a few meters afar and hit her ass on a tree.
"OW! Why did you do that for Kaiba!" Anzu cried out.
Yami Bakura, who was surfacing for a second on Bakura made a huge smirk, he also he been dreaming of pounding Anzu for some time now. The girl was so god damn annoying.
"I don't have time for this!" Seto spat.
"Kaiba, you look different," Yugi said in a concerned voice, the tri-colored hair boy apparently inched too close to Kaiba and because of Kaiba's beer belly and the disadvantage of Yugi's height, Yugi couldn't see Kaiba's face anymore. Yugi started blankly at the flab hanging out in front of him and in his curiousity, jabbed his finger in the CEO's stomach.
"What are you doing?! Get away from me, balloon head, NOW!!!" Kaiba panicked.
"I can't! I've lost my finger in there! AHHHHHH!!" Yugi screamed and started crying because his finger seems to have been devoured by a huge jelly monster.
"That's it! I'M OUT OF HERE!" Kaiba ran away quickly. The gang starred blankly at Kaiba's exposed thong as he dissapeared within the distance.
TBC
Story from or www.angeltowns.com/members/jackasssims/
Home of the Jackass Yugioh Sims.
Oh and don't be offended or take any of this seriously...some of the solutions in this story are totally unrealistic
Chapter 1: As long as your nice.
Kaiba continued to shoove the ice cream in his mouth, nothing mattered now, his ignornant, psychotic little Egyptian had broken up with him for weeks. Infact, it had been around 28 days. Kaiba simply sat during his little spare time at his mansion sitting on his couch, watching the television through numerous channels. Sometimes, he would spend his time working on the latest duel items but he'd still be munching on something.
"Big brother..." Mokuba suddenly popped up from the back of the couch, "...um..do you have a second?" It had been also 28 days until Mokuba finally had the courage to confront his elder brother who had isolated himself in the mansion.
"What is it, kid?" Seto responded like an automatic phone service and had not even bothered to take a small glance at his little black haired brother. The brunette took a huge gulp from his supersize chocolate milkshake.
"You don't seem to be spending any time with me recently..."
"I'm sorry kid, I'll make up for it tommorrow.."
"Hey,...Seto," Mokuba stated with widened eyes as something about the appearance of his brother seems to have been different but he wasn't sure if he should bring it up.
"What now...?"
"What is that?!" Mokuba suddenly shrieked, pointed at a huge bump on Kaiba's arm. "Hey! They're everywhere!"
"I haven't been myself recently."
"You've gained a lot of weight!"
"No I haven't."
"Look! Look at this thing! It's flab!" The little black haired boy freaked, poking at the flesh that was dangling loose around Kaiba everywhere.
"Whatever, I'm already trying to control it," Kaiba rolled his eyes taking a zip from his beer.
"Controlling it? How?!" Mokuba cried.
"Easy, you see these blue belt like strings I've been wearing since Battle City? They're good for squeezing my fat, making me look slim," the brunnette proudly spoke.
"No they're not, your fat is squeezing around it! It's so gross! It's looks like you've got balls everywhere."
"Muscles...they look like muscles...Mokuba."
"Seto, no one has 3 biceps and triceps on each arm! Or 3 of each muscle everywhere. You need to get a diet."
"Okay!" Seto stammered and stood up, "First off, Mokuba I'm am not getting fat, and second, I'm not wasting my time going on a stupid diet...I'll prove it to you that I'm in check with my weight!"
"Hmm...it looks like I did gain quite a bit of weight..." Kaiba frowned as the machine read '236 lbs.'
"Well you're not that fat," Mokuba started to comfort his brother after noticing the change in his brother's attitude.
"I'm fat."
"That's okay, as long as your nice."
"Mokuba, be quiet...I'm not even that..."
The summer break was almost over and he'd have to return to shit ass school again, he was worried, he didn't want any of his rivals to see him look this bad, they'll surely laugh at him. 'Wait a second, since when do I care of what those geeks think of me,' he scowled himself for being to pathetic. Instead, he should try to find ways to look like himself again.
"Let's see," he pondered as he sat on his desk, planning on his diet plan, 'Ryou is the thinnest boy I've ever seen, I wondered what he eats to keep in his shape? Yugi is also very thin.'
An idea hit him.
'Could chockers but the answer? I mean Yugi wears them and all it's probably good for is pushing up all the fat to his head, yeah that must be it! No wonder why he has such a big inflated head!' Kaiba immeadietely wrote down to buy several chockers on his shopping list.
"But what does Bakura do?" Seto pondered as he leaned back into his chair. "He wears stripped shirts..." He recalls of a magazine he happened to glanced at once accidently behind Tea's shoulder who was reading a fashion article. It mentioned that wearing vertical stripes makes a person look slimmer. He quickly scribbles that down too.
"What else..." He knew Jounouchi, Honda, Yugi, and Bakura all had one thing in common. A mid length jacket! 'Wait I have a jacket too! But it dangles to the floor.' He had been complimented a few times of people that said his jacket was cool, it looked like a cape while he walked. 'That's why!' He gasped, 'looking like a huge cape, mean looking huge! I'll have to stop wearing that white jacket for now.' Seto quickly wrote down that he had to get himself a jacket similar to those boys.
"Ah...my list is set!" The Ceo smirked proudly to himself, he planned to also wear dark colors since they'll help make him look slimmer. He could also give up on the junkfood. He wouldn't risk getting pills or buying those weight loss products. Those things never work and if he would never be full just drinking one weight loss drink, he'll have to drink a few, meaning he'd probably end up gaining more fat then he wanted. He'll have to stick to low fat products, fruits, veggies, and cereal period. Kaiba head out to get what he needed...
"Yeah! I won!" Jounouchi exclaimed happily jumping around that for once he actually defeated Yugi.
"Good game," Yugi smiled as he secretly puts away his current hand containing Monster Reborn, Mirror force, Swords of Revealing light, Mind Control and his trusty Dark Magician. He could have easily wiped out Jounouchi's forces with the Mirror force trap then throw in Mind control to snatch away the one monster Jounouchi had in defense position and then Monster Reborn a monster from a graveyard then summon his Dark Magician and won the duel since Jounouchi had no magic or trap cards out on the vanishing field. But he'll let that slip, just for once.
"I can't believe Jounouchi did it!" Anzurejoiced, proud of her friend.
"It's surely amazing," Bakura clapped.
"Man it's noon now, don't you guys think we should grab something to eat," Honda said, rubbing his stomach like the pig he is.
"Yea...I'm starvin'" Jounouchi added.
The gang begin to pack up their picnic at the park and were about to leave when Bakura spotted something. "Hey look guys, that looks like Kaiba."
"Wha? Hey it is...but something looks different about him."
Kaiba froze when he saw the most hated people of his existence staring at him, he orignally planned to just take a jog around the park so it'll help him lose some pounds but he's about to change his mind. He should run away fast! He spun around and jolted but he ran smack into someone then they both fell back on the floor. A ripping sound was heard. The gang then caught up to him.
"Ow, watch it, fat ass!" Ryougi spat before realizing who he had ranted on, "Seto Kaiba!" Ryouji took a brief look over the CEO before concluding..."What the fuck did you do to yourself?!"
Kaiba was wearing a black and white vertically stripped shirt with a black chocker and jeans that appeared too tight on him. He wore several wrist bands and even one on his upper arms. Supposibly the combination of a chocker and wrist bands should look good, but along with his other clothes, Kaiba looked like a fashion disaster. Also because he fell on his ass, his tight jeans ripped from behind, exposing his black thong.
"Why does Kaiba look like that?" Anzu asked in her common bitchy voice.
Kaiba sat up and Anzu inched in closer, he placed his hand on her cheek and with that one hand, shooved her face away. Because of Kaiba's extra weight, Anzu was shooved a few meters afar and hit her ass on a tree.
"OW! Why did you do that for Kaiba!" Anzu cried out.
Yami Bakura, who was surfacing for a second on Bakura made a huge smirk, he also he been dreaming of pounding Anzu for some time now. The girl was so god damn annoying.
"I don't have time for this!" Seto spat.
"Kaiba, you look different," Yugi said in a concerned voice, the tri-colored hair boy apparently inched too close to Kaiba and because of Kaiba's beer belly and the disadvantage of Yugi's height, Yugi couldn't see Kaiba's face anymore. Yugi started blankly at the flab hanging out in front of him and in his curiousity, jabbed his finger in the CEO's stomach.
"What are you doing?! Get away from me, balloon head, NOW!!!" Kaiba panicked.
"I can't! I've lost my finger in there! AHHHHHH!!" Yugi screamed and started crying because his finger seems to have been devoured by a huge jelly monster.
"That's it! I'M OUT OF HERE!" Kaiba ran away quickly. The gang starred blankly at Kaiba's exposed thong as he dissapeared within the distance.
TBC
Story from or www.angeltowns.com/members/jackasssims/
Home of the Jackass Yugioh Sims.