AN: Hello everyone! Much Thanks for even clicking on my story! Now I know
this is a "hermione/draco" story, but you could imagine whatever pairing
you'd like, because there are no names ever mentioned. It is pure angst, because I was
feeling lonely one day. Regardless, I really hope you like my story!
And don't forget to review too! Flame me if you so desire; I'm just happy that
someone actually read this. smirks Now, onto the story!

All Because Of You, My Love

Why?
Why can't I die?
I've tried so many times.
I chicken out.
I remind myself of "all I have to live for."
…Like what?
Back stabbing friends, a fucked up family, being addicted to drugs and pain?
But then I think of you.
You..
The one I love. The one I desperately want.

The one I wished loved me; as much as I loved him.
Then I remember… the past and even now, of how you, my love, have treated me.
You used me.
You hated me.
You laughed at me.
You never gave me a glance.
You never noticed me.
You never even tried to.
You never loved me.

You never gave me a chance.

...One chance, to prove myself worthy.
Of you, and your wealthy love.
I now remember where I am.
Sitting in my shower, so it wouldn't be too messy if I went through with it.
I remember the razor blade that is still in my hands.
Its cool touch calms me, but it luster is like death; looking at me wanting me to follow it.
Where you cant torment me anymore.
I decide it must end now.
I am sick of you.
I don't know how I could ever put up with everything you've done to me.

Wishing that next time would be better.
Well there will be no more next times.
Not for me.
Would you ever miss me?
Doubtful.
Would you be sad that I was gone?
Not likely..
Would you even come to my funeral?
In my dreams…
That's it.
I cant take it anymore.
I don't want to feel.
I cant feel anything but emotions consisting of:
Grief.
Pain.
Sorrow.
Damn mortal emotions.
I must get this over with before it sinks in what I am going to do.
Hurry..
Quick.
Now.
Now!..
NOW!...
I slash the razor into my skin.
Deep.
Oh so very deep.
And feel a surge of pain that makes me clutch at my wrist.
…Then I see it.
The most comforting thing I have ever seen in my whole life.
Blood.
Blood pouring out of my wrist, and all over my arm.
I stare at the scarlet color.
Amazed at how well it blends with the pale skin form my arm.
I am staring in awe.
I did it.
I finally did it.
For the first time in my life…
I smile.
A true, pure smile of happiness, of sadness, of every emotion.
I smile.
Yet then the smile starts to fade.
I feel so weak..
So faint.
So close to death, but yet still far enough away to still be living.
And it all starts to rush through my head.

..What about my friends?
Sure, they weren't good friends, but I would've still forgiven them anyway

..And my family?
I'm sure they will never be happy again.

…And you?

Maybe you would've given me a chance.
Maybe we could've been together.
Maybe you could've looked past the whores surrounding you, and saw me in the corner.
Waiting for you.

I've always been waiting for you…

Oh god.
What have I done?
I don't want to die!
Give me one more chance!
Just one more.
Please?
Please!
PLEASE!
But not even God can save me now.
My heart has run out of blood to keep me going.
I fall backwards into a puddle of my own blood, and feel like shit.
This solved nothing.
I thought my problems would be gone, they are still all here, plus more now.
And now I see a bright white light.
it hurts my eyes so much, but I feel no pain, for my body has become numb.
And feels like 10,000 needles are being stuck into it again and again.
The light is brighter now…
It keeps getting brighter.
Why wont it stop!
PLEASE, GIVE ME ONE MORE CHANCE!
I shout, I scream, I wail.
Hoping someone will hear me.
How could they though?
I'm invisible to the world.
It will be as if I was never born.
…That damned white light.
I'm so scared now.
Its so… cold.
I'm crying.
I don't want to be here.
I'd rather be unhappy and go on with life.
…But you can't change the past; what you do is what you do.
And now, as I feel death above me, around me; inside me.
I finally give into it.
He wins.
I am tired.
I am weak..
I am dead…

And it's All because of you, my love.