AN: In this AU of twilight, vampires sleep. Kind of like TVD, that's why there's a bed. And for other reasons too later on ;)
When I get out of the shower I can smell something delicious wafting from the kitchen. I dry off quickly, and finish shaving my legs. After dressing, I walk out of the bathroom and towards Alice.
"What are you making?" I ask, looking into the pan.
"What does it look like dipshit? Pancakes. I'm making pancakes."
I laugh, "Well, they smell good."
She turns to me in that pixie-like way that she always does and smiles, "Thank you. You smell good too. What shower gel did you use?"
"Alice, seriously, cut it out. You have to stop this weird, flirting with me thing."
She smirks and pushes her body into mine, I start backing up, but she puts a hand on my back, stopping me from moving.
"Bella, I think you know what you want, and I know you're obsessed with me. So do us both a favor and put yourself out of your misery."
I'm lying to myself, and Alice and we both know it. I know how I feel about her, but I don't know what to do. What happens if I kiss her? Are we dating? I mean, sure I always had a little crush on Alice during high school, but I thought every girl felt that way. I thought that everyone had a crush on another girl at some point, regardless of their sexuality, I guess I was wrong.
Before I know it, I begin to cry, and I collapse into Alice's arms.
"Alice, I miss Charlie so much." I say through sobs, my tears streaking and ruining her t-shirt.
"Oh Bella, I know, but it's okay. I'm here for you."
Her small arms wrapped around my waist feel so good, and comforting in a way that I can't explain. Her aurora is entirely bliss, and I don't want that change. Sure, her flirting with me is awkward, and makes me question myself on an hourly basis, but I'm thankful for Alice. Her kindness and warmth have been so necessary to me, and I feel like I can let everything I've been holding in out. It all comes pouring out, the tears, the emotions, - everything. Alice always knows what to say, and what to do, so when she is left speechless I am surprised.
"I'm glad you're here Alice," I murmur, pulling out of the hug, as if filling in for her. She smiles warmly, and turns to the pancakes, flipping them over.
"The pancakes are almost done, are you hungry?" She asks, taking the pancakes out of the pan and onto a plate.
Before I can reply, my stomach answers for me, rumbling loudly.
"Yeah," I say, "I'm hungry."
We sit at the table and I pour maple syrup over my pancakes, putting a piece into my mouth. It tastes soft and fluffy, and I don't think I've ever been more hungry.
We stay and eat pancakes for a while, until I can no longer stuff myself full of food. Alice clears the table and begins to wash the dishes, while I sit and watch her. Her hands carefully wash and cover each dish and utensil with soap, then washing it off with the hot water from the tap. I watch her do it over and over again, until I become restless. I want to help, I feel bad sitting here.
I wander over to Alice, and stand by her side,
"Can I help you with the dishes?" I ask, a smile creeping up my face.
"Sure," she says brightly, "you can dry them."
She hands me a tea towel and I begin to dry a glass. Keeping my hands busy is necessary when I'm around Alice, she makes me too nervous, I don't know what I would do with empty hands. Perhaps kiss her? I could not have that, it would confuse me too much, and I don't want to send Alice mixed signals. My brain is telling me to keep cool, because Alice is my friend, and I've known her forever. But my heart is telling me to sweep her off of her feet and carry her to our honeymoon. I seriously don't know what I am going to do.
Alice hands me another glass, but when my hand goes to grab it, hers wrap around mine.
"Be careful Bella," she exclaims, "your hands are extremely shaky."
I try to pry the glass from her grip, but it's no use, she's simply too strong. I wonder what I would do if she pinned me to the - No! Bella, stop! I can't be thinking this, I can't, it's wrong.
"Bella?" She whispers, "What are you thinking about? You're all flustered again."
I gulp, swallowing the lump in my throat, but it's no use. It just rushes down into my stomach and turns into butterflies. Before I know it, Alice is ushering me backwards, until I can't walk any further and my back crashes into the wall. She steps forward and brings her lips to my ears, our cheeks touching. Her hands rest at my waist, and my eyes don't know where to look. I can feel her tiny stomach pressed against mine, her breasts resting at the same level as mine. My heart is racing, and my palms are practically dripping with sweat.
"Tell me what you're thinking," she whispers.
"I- I'm thinking about…" I trail off,
"Yes?"
"I'm thinking about you Alice." I regret saying it the second it leaves my mouth. I feel like we've gone two steps backwards, back into this awkward confusion, this never-ending embarrassment and hurt. I can't help the way I feel about Alice, but I can help what comes out of my mouth - except for right now. Right in this moment it feels like I could tell Alice my deepest, darkest desires and I wouldn't think twice about it. I could look her in the eye and tell her I love her without any qualms. Not that I love her, I just feel like I could say something like that without worrying about it.
"Good thoughts I hope?" She replies in a soft voice, her legs brushing against mine.
"No," I murmur, "because I know they'll never be reality."
She pulls back slightly, her face now inches from mine, her eyes locked on my lips.
"Bella," she croaks, "I need to tell you something."
"What is it?" I question, whatever it is, it can't be good.
"I- It's about C-Charlie," she whispers softly, her voice barely catching in my ears. She pulls away now, our contact broken, and my body longing for more.
"What about Charlie?" I say hardly, I don't want to talk about him, let alone hear his name.
"He d-didn't really die in the fires or the accident, he was killed."
I raise an eyebrow, how on earth would she know this? And why should I believe her?
"Edward was there, and he was hungry. You know how bad he is when he eats one human, he can't stop."
My heart drops, and my stomach sinks,
"Alice, please don't say what I think you're saying."
She begins to cry and so do I, I can't help it.
"Edward didn't recognize Charlie until he was standing over his corpse."
I stutter, and choke, my voice breaking into pieces I didn't know it had. My body trembles and sweat drips down my forehead, my hair suddenly feels like a weight on my head, heavy and bulbous. My mouth dries out instantly, my hands clenched into fists, and I can't help but fall into Alice's arms again. Her soft body pressed up to mine feels so good in a way that I can't explain. It doesn't make the pain go away, but it soothes it. It's like pouring cold ice over a hot fire that has spread through my veins. The anger that I have, - the hurt - and the passion. And before Alice or I know what I'm doing, my lips are on hers.
She's soft, tender, and her hands reach up my face, one running through my hair. I place one hand on her head, the other landing on her waist. I feel my stomach collapse into her body and my arms wrapped around her. I am hugging her, but making out with her at the same time, and I don't know how to feel about it.
My entire body is filled with a hunger that I didn't know I had, and I crave more. I feel like an addict coming back for another hit, and I never want it to end. I never want her lips off of mine, or her body away from me.
She pulls back, scooping my hair behind my ear with her right hand. Our foreheads are touching and her smile is wide, grinning up at me.
"Wow," she says, breathless, as if she could get breathless anyway.
"Wow," I reply, "that was-"
"Hot?" She fills in.
I laugh, still looking at her, "Yeah, that was hot."
She pulls back, grabbing my hand and leading me towards the bedroom.
"C'mon, let's go to bed, you look exhausted."