After that night in which she had shared an almost idyllic dream with Laudna, Imogen had expected her interactions with her friend to become a little awkward, but Laudna was still a ray of sunshine in her life, her rock. She still felt guilty, of course, but Laudna never mentioned the dream to her so she thought maybe she didn't remember it. So the second time, it happened without Imogen even trying, not actively at least.
The party had returned to Jrusar, they were beaten, with scars that would last for a lifetime, they had learned a lot about themselves and their companions, they had returned changed. When Laudna and Imogen returned to their room at Zhudanna's, everything seemed to have come from a past life, so long ago.
That night, Laudna had offered her the possibility of having the bed to herself, that she would sleep in a roll on the floor next to her, but Imogen could no longer conceive of sleeping without Laudna by her side, she already had a hard time controlling her anxiety when the woman was out of her sight for more than a few minutes, after all she'd been through, much less all night. She hadn't dreamed of the storm since but its presence followed her like a shadow she couldn't shake, always lurking, on the periphery of her awareness. Only Laudna's hand, firmly in hers, anchored her to reality. Laudna knew this, so when she proposed the new sleeping arrangement and Imogen fell silent, she immediately understood that her place was next to Imogen's.
It was a quiet night, the stars twinkled sleepily, only Catha's glow coming through the window as the curtains swayed placidly in the night breeze. Imogen was lying on her side with Laudna wrapped around her; big moon and little moon, Imogen thought longingly and snuggled closer against Laudna's front. The woman, sensing her friend's discomfort, crossed her arm around the young woman's waist, still lost in dreams. Imogen sighed deeply and linked her fingers with Laudna's, closing her eyes and reaching out. Laudna's thoughts had always been musical to her, but her dreams were like a balm of calm in a dark and troubled world.
This time she found Laudna on the porch of a cabin she didn't know, in a forest of abundant pines and patches of yellow and white flowers that extended beyond what she could see. Laudna rocked slowly in a rocking chair, humming a cheery tune as she mended a crimson shirt, she looked up and smiled broadly at her.
"You're back early today, darling," she told her as she packed her sewing supplies into a huge wicker basket. In the distance, a horse neighed. "Have you left Flora grazing?"
There was so much to process for Imogen's poor mind that she could only nod and follow Laudna into the cabin. Inside, there was a pot bubbling with stew that smelled wonderful over the hearth fire, Laudna stopped in front of the small table and cut a few slices of fresh, still steaming bread. That was what heaven must be like, Imogen thought, trying to take in and remember every detail of that dream.
At the periphery of her vision, Imogen could see moving shadows, startled by the light that was Laudna's dream but still present and lurking.
The dream suddenly changed, they were no longer in the cabin but under a night sky in a field of poppies. The scent of summer dew and fresh grass washed over her. Lying next to her was Laudna, looking at her with starry eyes.
"Can't sleep, love?" the velvety whisper reached her ears and a gasp got caught in her throat. Imogen never thought that a word could sound so good on Laudna's lips.
"I can only sleep if you're by my side" she dared to confess, moving to face the brunette, reaching for a pale cheek with her trembling fingertips.
"Darling, I will always be by your side." Laudna leaned in close and kissed her and Imogen closed her arms around her because otherwise she felt she would die. If she didn't hug her, if she didn't cling to their bond she felt like she might disappear.
Laudna's lips on hers felt warm and soft, they kissed her as if she were the most precious thing they had ever held near her, and Imogen reveled in their adoration.
"Mine" Laudna whispered against her lips, Imogen breathed in the word and anchored it to her heart.
"Yours" she replied, entangling her fingers through black locks, desperately trying to fuse her soul with the woman's, once and for all.
But the dream suddenly ended and Imogen was brought back to reality rather abruptly. Laudna had jumped out of bed and now she was staring out the window, staring into Jrusar's night sky.
"Laud, what's wrong? are you alright?" Imogen's voice sounded genuinely worried.
"Oh dear, did I wake you up? I'm so sorry" the woman replied, looking at her distressed. "I had a dream..."
"A nightmare?" Imogen hastened to ask.
"No, not at all, just…" Laudna didn't elaborate further, Imogen didn't ask her to.
"Come back to bed, Laud... tonight I'll take care of you"
Laudna finally smiled at her and walked over to the bed, her gaze projecting only adoration that cut Imogen to the bone. The girl extended her arms to her as if giving her the welcome that Laudna needed, and Laudna accepted with a wide smile.
Imogen was careful not to invade Laudna's dreams for the rest of the night but she couldn't help but let a spark of hope light up in her heart.
The third time Imogen dived into Laudna's dreams it was a conscious and deliberate act, she knew what she was doing and what she was looking for.
A week had passed since the previous time, a week in which the ghost of Laudna's lips was still present on hers like a siren's song. The moments in which she found herself looking at her or thinking about her were becoming more frequent and extensive... and the heat in the depths of her being continued to increase.
One particularly hot morning, the two had risen early and, with a shopping list written by Zhudanna, headed to the market. Imogen held Laudna's hand as the tall woman stopped at every stall to inspect the wares for sale with almost childlike curiosity. If it were up to Imogen, she would tie Laudna to her hip and not let her go more than a few steps away from her, but that possessiveness of hers had to be controlled, she knew. For the moment she was content to have their fingers intertwined as they walked comfortably through the alleys of the market.
She was so distracted that she didn't notice the crowd that had gathered in front of a bakery that was opening that same day. People, excited by the handing out of free samples of small pancakes that looked very appetizing, crowded the narrow street trying to find a place. Suddenly, the riot of excited thoughts invaded her mind and Imogen had to hold her head to try to silence them, she had to get out of there fast but she was surrounded by them. Her eyes began to look around frantically, searching for a way out, she tried to squeeze Laudna's hand to make her follow her but her fingers were no longer intertwined. Before Imogen began to truly despair, a pair of thin but solid arms closed around her waist from behind, Laudna's voice in her ear instantly reassuring.
"Don't worry, dearest, I'm right here. We'll find a way out."
Imogen felt a chill run through her entire body but she instinctively pressed herself against Laudna's body as she led her out of the crushing mass of people.
In just a few minutes, Laudna was able to get them out of the crowd and led them to a shadowy and dank but empty and quiet alley. Laudna leaned against the alley wall, pulling Imogen with her, feeling her body relax against her.
"Thank you, Laud. I didn't realize there was going to be so many people in one place." Imogen had closed her eyes, completely relaxed in Laudna's arms.
"You know I always take care of you, darling." Laudna's words sounded like warm velvet in Imogen's ears; the dark, damp alley hid her blush as she trapped her bottom lip between her own teeth. She turned her head looking for Laudna but Laudna's lips found her forehead first, giving her a tender kiss that lasted a few moments, long enough for Imogen to imagine those cool lips on her heated ones. She turned in Laudna's arms and buried her face in the curve of her neck, her hands on her friend's hips, not daring to go any higher even though that was the only thing she wanted to do. Laudna hugged her tighter.
"Don't worry, Imogen, soon the people will disperse and we can get out of here."
"Mhmm" was all Imogen could say, she was afraid that if she opened her mouth she was going to make some most undignified sound.
They were both in that position for what seemed like the whole morning until the crowd had thinned out enough for them to finish their shopping quickly.
Returning to Zhudanna's, Imogen was still a little shaken by the situation. Not because of the invading thoughts of all these people, but because of the strength of her feelings for Laudna, her mind couldn't stop thinking about what it had felt like to have her so pressed against her body, the scent of her skin directly on her skin, her delicate frame between her hands.
So when they went to bed and Laudna spooned her up like every night, Imogen waited expectantly for the moment when the woman fell asleep. She closed her eyes and focused on Laudna's calm breathing behind her, her arms around her waist. Outside, the chirping of crickets was the only thing breaking the stillness of a peaceful night.
When Imogen opened her eyes again she found herself in front of the door of a familiar room, she knew that beyond the door was the room that she shared with Laudna in Zhudanna's, but she didn't understand what she was doing there. She looked both ways down the hall but didn't see Laudna. The darkness extended beyond both ends of the corridor, a faint yellowish light was visible under the door of the room. With trembling hands, she opened it.
"I was waiting for you" Laudna's figure was drawn against the candlelight on the nightstand, making her camisole look almost transparent.
Imogen's mouth went dry quickly and she tried to wet her lips, drawing Laudna's eyes to them. The woman in front of Imogen was a vision of sensuality, her dark eyes fixed on her made her skin feel on fire, the slim silhouette under her nightgown inviting her to come closer, to touch her. But Imogen couldn't move, she was rooted to the floor; She didn't know what to expect when she entered the dream, but it definitely wasn't this.
"Come here my dear" Laudna held out a hand to the motionless Imogen, the most tempting invitation she had ever received.
With tentative steps, Imogen reached out to take Laudna's hand and it closed hard around it, Laudna drew her until her bodies were facing each other, but she didn't stop there. Laudna took a few steps back to the edge of the bed and sat on it, pulling Imogen to her, never taking her dark eyes from the lilac orbes of the other woman.
As if it were a perfectly natural move for her, and at Laudna's insistent tug, Imogen straddled her, knees on either side of her hips. Laudna took hold of her waist, pulling her closer until their bodies were pressed together. Imogen's arms went around the woman's neck, her gaze fixed on dark lips that parted just a bit.
"You have no idea how much I wanted you to visit me in my dreams tonight" Laudna's husky voice washed over her like a sweet caress, but her words echoed in her numb brain in surprise.
"I would have been so jealous if you dived in other people's dreams instead of mine, darling." Laudna's side smirk made Imogen's insides melt in a heat that quickly spread to her core.
"Laud, I don't... I mean..."
"Shhh, baby…" Laudna stopped Imogen from babbling with a hand on the back of her neck and her lips on hers, with a slow sensual kiss that made her immediately lose her sanity. "Just let go"