I have nothing to say about this other than I have no idea where it came from. Either way, I hope you enjoy this little thing I wrote on my phone.
It's happened again. He just knows it. How? He can feel it. His entire body is burning as if he's on fire. He probably has been, at least from his hands. His eyes sting as if he's been crying, or at least fighting the tears, and his head is pounding something fierce.
Memories are still rushing through his head, though. The confusion he felt when he was just a little kid when he turned to show his parents something and they had disappeared. The hurt when they weren't there, the fear when he couldn't find them.
He didn't want to admit it, but fear found him more often than he let on. Especially back then. Was he looking after his little sister right? Was she getting enough food, enough warmth, enough education? And heaven forbid if she got sick. It was lucky she'd managed to survive the healing periods with how he acted.
And, oh God, the panic he was in when Nya came to him in a panic herself over the fact that she had reached puberty. That was probably one of the more fun times of his life, please note the sarcasm. Also one of the most embarrassing. He doesn't remember who, the village chief? the doctor?, but someone made sure to teach both of them about life. And he just made sure to really know everything after that just in case something worse happened. Thank the First Master he did because it was he who ended up teaching both Zane and Lloyd about life.
And, oh gosh, now he was thinking about those boys. Zane's selflessness was one thing to deal with. Honestly, why did he always have to sacrifice himself? Did he not realise how much it would hurt to lose him? Over and over again?
But Lloyd was just heart attack material. Show the kid some love and he ends up in pit after pit after damn pit of disaster. With everything wrong with the kid, or at least in his life, he honestly wanted to wrap him in a straight jacket, wrap him in bubble wrap, throw him in a padded room in a secret and highly defended bunker somewhere and just leave him there. There's been more than one time where he's nearly died just trying to protect the kid.
He honestly couldn't count how many nightmares he's had of the kid. Being possessed, almost drowning, the cages, the lava, everything else his mind manages to think up that includes some horrible death aimed at the kid. And if the nightmares weren't about Lloyd or Zane or Nya, they were about Cole.
Oh, Cole. Every time it was the strongest of them falling into a dark abyss. The ground opening up underneath him, black tendrils dragging him into the darkness, into dark waters that would disintegrate him. His heart clenched at the thought of actually losing the big guy. He just knew that one day he would fall and never return... and he personally dreaded that day.
He wanted to protect them all. He needed to be strong for all of them because who was going to pick them all up when they were down themselves? But why wouldn't this just go away?
" Kai! Kai. It's okay. He's okay." Someone said somewhere in the distance.
That's right. Jay. Jay wasn't okay. He was hurt. He was bleeding out. All because he couldn't get there in time. He couldn't protect him. From him!
He just had to lose his grip on the sword he held. It just had to go sailing through the air. It just had to slice right through Jay's shoulder, right to the bone. And he couldn't stop it before it did.
It was his fault.
Just like when he lost Nya. Just like when Zane left. Just like with all those times with Lloyd and Cole and... and... it was his fault!
That's what started the spiral. He knows that's what it was. Now. But it doesn't stop the fact that it's happened again and this time it was his fault.
" Hey, hey, hey. Listen to me, Kai. Listen to me." The voice was somewhat clearer, masculine at least.
But what was there to listen to? He was a failure, a menace to all around him. Was this what Lloyd felt like whenever he found him curled in a ball under his bed on similar days? That no one should know him because he was a danger to all?
Oh God, he was a fool coming out here. In the rain. He should have just stayed inside and played video games with Jay that way none of this would have happened. No pain. No blood. No screams.
The screams. They just wouldn't stop. Hadn't the others already taken Jay into the med bay? Why wouldn't the screams just stop? It was making the pounding in his head worse.
What the heck was happening?!
"Shh, Kai. It's okay. Everything's okay. You're okay. Just calm down."
No. Everything was not okay. Everything hurt. Everything burned. Was something sizzling? Why won't the screaming stop? Why did everything have to go wrong today? Why was he panicking?
Why was he panicking?
There was nothing to panic over. Yeah he melted the fry pan this morning, that was an accident. The nightmare he had had the night before was a doozy. The argument he had had with Lloyd wasn't much better. But they had sorted that out before he went to do some training. Right? And the rain had come while he was training.
Before his thoughts could even continue the spiral it was on, someone or something wrapped him up in their embrace. Finally, he looked up. Finally, the screams stopped. And he looked right into the concerned and terrified eyes of Cole and Lloyd.
" There you are, Kai. You're all right. Let's get you inside." Cole managed to say.
" What?" He rasped out.
So that was where the screams were coming from. Him.
" Everything's going to be okay now. We're here for you."
" Jay?"
" Jay's going to be just fine. Master Wu and Zane have taken him to the hospital to get the wound looked at properly."
" Nya?"
" Right beside you, brother. It's my turn to be here for you, now." Nya's voice came from beside him, helping him to his feet and squeezing his shoulders slightly. " I'm right here."