Content warning - Depression/mental health issues

When Kairi saw Riku out of her bedroom window the next morning, heading towards the Gummi ship, she was confused. He'd said he wouldn't be joining the others on their missions for a while, why would he be leaving now? And if he was sneaking out in the morning before the rest of them were up, she somehow doubted he was just going for ice cream. He was starting the engines already so she threw her window open and leapt out, summoning her glider.

It appeared beneath her and as she sped down Riku looked up from the ship controls. Seeing that she had caught him, he sighed. He'd been hoping to avoid this. He set the ship back down anyway, if he didn't she wouldn't stop calling him until she got an explanation for why he had snubbed her.

As he disembarked she landed in front of him and jumped off onto the dewy grass. "Morning," he called out, trying to sound relatively cheerful.

Kairi had been so focussed on stopping him that she hadn't even bothered to put shoes on, or a jacket over her pyjamas. Her feet were freezing already. "Where are you going?"

"Disney Castle, going to go stay with Mickey for a bit."

"But I thought you were going to stay here?"

"I think it would be better if I wasn't here for a while, and I'm sure the others would appreciate more help exploring Scala ad Caelum."

"I thought you wanted to join in with training though, and be with Sora?" His chest tightened a little and he looked away. Kairi narrowed her eyes. "What happened yesterday? Did you and Sora have a fight or something?"

There wasn't much point lying to her. "Something like that. He doesn't want me to be around right now."

"Of course he does, why would you think that?"

"Because he told me."

"What?!" Kairi stared at him, sure he couldn't be serious. "He wouldn't say that... why would he say that?"

Riku shrugged. "Don't know. He was pretty clear though."

Why on earth would Sora tell him that? She opened and closed her mouth a few times, but she couldn't think of anything to say.

Riku glanced back up at her with a half-hearted smile. "I'm going to head off, could you say goodbye to the others for me?"

She nodded, feeling slightly dazed, and then ran forward to hug him. When she drew back she tried to return the smile "He's lying Riku. I hope you come back soon."

"Heh, maybe..." and with that, he turned to board the Gummi ship. His brain was a mess. He didn't know if Sora had been lying, or what the reason might be if he was, but it seemed wrong to dismiss what he had said and stay right now anyway. He'd seemed pretty certain that he didn't want him here. If leaving would make Sora feel better, or at least less sad or angry, then Riku was more than happy to do it.

As he sat down and the ship's engine began whirring up he took the charm Kairi had made him out of his pocket and stared down at it. He hoped these would bring the three of them back together soon. It seemed like they had always worked for the other two before, he just had to hope it worked for him as well.

Kairi watched as the ship took off, shivering in the cold and heart sinking, then looked up at Sora's bedroom window. The curtains were open and she could just make out his silhouette, watching Riku leave as well.

She tried bringing up what Riku had said with Sora, but every time she asked he would brush it off as nothing, or more often just ignore what she said entirely. After two days of questioning, the most she managed to get out of him was a single "I don't want to talk about it," before he changed the subject and refused to acknowledge anything else she said about him.

She didn't get much more out of Riku either, though she suspected that was because there wasn't much he had to tell her. He seemed just as in the dark as she was about Sora's sudden coldness.

She just didn't get it. Every day they had seemed closer and closer, she'd even had a bet going with Ven about how much longer they'd have to wait before they could finally start teasing them. Why had Sora pushed him away so suddenly?

She decided to drop it after asking if Riku had done something to upset him, and clearly hit a nerve.

They'd been sitting on the steps in the courtyard, waiting for Ven to return from a day trip to Twilight Town to stock up on ice cream and treats from the Bistro. Kairi had stayed behind, not wanting to leave Sora by himself while they got to go off and have fun. Sora would have much preferred it if she had gone.

They had been chatting relatively normally, Sora working hard to keep some emotion in his voice, but his chest tightened when Kairi brought up Riku yet again.
"Did he do something wrong, and you guys had a fight or some-?"

He felt a sudden flare of anger. He stood up from the steps and whirled around to her, glaring. "He hasn't done anything wrong, all right!" he snapped furiously, cutting her off before she could finish the question.

Kairi was stunned and, seeing her face, Sora immediately regretted what he said and his anger disappeared as quickly as it had come.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" he apologised desperately, horrified he had spoken to her that way. He took a deep breath and hung his head, feeling ashamed. "I... Please, can we not talk about it? I'm sorry but I just can't right now."

She stared at him silently, then nodded. "OK, I'll stop." He looked up at her and felt a wave of self-loathing as he saw her eyes were shining. But she stood up and hugged him. "Please talk to me if it will help though. About anything."

He hugged her back. "Yeah... I'm really sorry Kairi."

"It's OK, I'm sorry too."

When they broke apart though, his eyes were empty again. "I'm going inside, I'll see you at dinner."

She wanted to go with him, or to stop him and ask him to stay sitting with her, but she didn't. His face was stone, and from his tone, there was no use arguing with him. So she nodded and sat back down as he climbed the steps and went inside.

His stomach felt like lead. All he had wanted to do was avoid causing them more pain, yet here he was, lashing out at her. He had been right to ask Riku to leave, but he wished instead that Riku could have stayed, and he was the one who had left instead.

Sora did his best to keep up appearances. He joined the others for meals, hung around to chat and watch them play games in the evenings, and tried to show as much interest in Aqua and Terra's stories of exploring Scala ad Caelum as he could. But it rapidly became harder to do any of those things, and after just a few days, he was trying to avoid them all as much as possible, not caring if it made them suspicious anymore.

Being around other people was too overwhelming. He didn't understand how he had ever had the energy to spend so much time with people in the past.

He stayed in his room as much as he could. Initially, they all assumed whenever he disappeared off by himself during the day he was sleeping, as he was obviously still very fatigued. But as days went by, and the dark circles beneath his eyes deepened, they began to doubt this. Each morning he looked more ashen-faced and worn than the previous.

He'd been sure he could just put on a happy face for them all, and use the time he had alone to try and figure this thing out. If he could just figure out what was wrong with him then he could try and fix it. But within a few days of Riku leaving he realised it was a lost cause. He'd felt broken for a long, long time, and, unlike his charm, he knew there was no way for his pieces to be glued back together.

Kairi and Riku had assured him that if he never got better things would still be OK, that they'd still be with him and life could still go on. They'd told him they could still all be together, and that he would still have his friends.

"We aren't going anywhere, no matter what."

But Kairi had meant if his body never recovered, if he was tired and weak forever and could never wield the Keyblade again. She hadn't meant this. She hadn't known about this, none of them had known. If the two of them had, he wasn't sure if they would have said the same thing.

He'd told Kairi his nightmares had all but gone since they left the tower, and he was fine sleeping in a room by himself now. He didn't want her to know how bad they still were, or hear him if he spoke in his sleep and deduce what he was dreaming about.

She had wondered about popping into his room at night anyway to check if things really were better but, like Riku, had been confronted by a locked door. Unlocking it with her Keyblade felt like too much of an invasion of privacy, so each evening she just hoped the next night he would forget. He never did though.

He did everything he could to avoid sleep and spent most nights staring at the ceiling in his room, or walking through the castle grounds once he knew everyone else had gone to bed. The spot where Ven, Aqua, and Terra had once watched a meteor shower together was his favourite place to sit, and he found himself there most nights.

He didn't know why, but it seemed to be one of the few places where he would go and feel his brain quieten. He wasn't sure which he preferred, the numbness he felt sitting here, or the hopeless thoughts that plagued him the rest of the time. But he felt drawn to this place nonetheless. It was the only place where the world really did seem to stop for a small about of time.

He didn't understand what was happening and, more strangely, he soon found himself not caring. What was the point anyway? This hole in his chest wasn't going away, it was as permanent as the scar that sat above it. Marking him forever. Did it even matter what this was?

Terra and Aqua divided their weeks relatively evenly between travelling to other worlds and staying at the castle, which was more than enough time at home for them to recognise something was happening to Sora, and they had a theory about what it was. They suspected what he was experiencing was similar to something that they had both felt in the past.

It had plagued Aqua in the realm of darkness, and then followed her back to the realm of light. After finally escaping Xehanort's grasp Terra had fallen into the same pit, tortured by the memories of what he had been forced to do. The look of hollow despondence in Sora's eyes was horribly familiar to them both.

Having been through it themselves didn't mean they knew how to 'fix' it though, and as Sora isolated himself more and more they faced a terrible conundrum. How could they help him without driving him further away? They recognised the same misery and pain in his face and in the slow, dispassionate way he spoke, but back then they had found themselves clinging to each other to try and get through. Being with each other, with Ven, and with other friends, had been one of the only ways they found solace.

Even at the times when Terra felt he didn't deserve to be close to Ven and Aqua after what he had done while Xehanort controlled him, he had wanted nothing more than to be with them, although also to constantly apologise.

Sora didn't seek out anyone's company though.

Of course, he still hadn't known the two of them or Ventus that long, so it wasn't all that unexpected that he wasn't reaching out to them. But for him to be keeping his closest friends away? For him to ignore Donald and Goofy's messages and calls; to cold shoulder Kairi when she tried to speak to him; to ask Riku to leave? These weren't actions they could relate to or understand.

They tried their best to help though, along with Ven and Kairi. Terra and Ven adopted the strategy of distraction and fun. They would try to chat and joke and make Sora laugh, desperate to cheer him up and pull him away from his thoughts, with no success at all. All it got them was the occasional forced laugh and fake smile.

Kairi tried not to be overbearing, and not to nag or pester him as best she could, but she was desperate to get him to talk to her. She didn't know how to help him, and all she could do was watch as he faded away. It was like he was gradually disappearing within himself, his body becoming nothing but a shell. Even his movements seemed dulled and slow, as though piece by piece, he was turning into a statue, one that would simply sit and stare into the distance with empty eyes.

The more anxious she got the more he pushed her away, and the more he pushed her away the more frantic she became. He would rebuff every attempt she made at physical affection and closeness, no longer returning hugs and standing up to leave whenever she sat down next to him.

She called Riku frequently and on the occasions when he actually answered her she would try to explain to him just how bad things were, how worried she was and how much she wanted him to come back. Riku hated these calls.

He didn't know what to do either. He was worried, and a constant feeling of being on edge had taken root in his chest, but he didn't see how he could do anything to help. Sora didn't want him there, didn't want to speak to him or see him, why would he come back when he would just make things worse?

He was still smarting from the pain of being asked to leave as well. What Sora said had hurt, and dragged back up the bitterness he had felt after Sora disappeared from this world, never having said goodbye.

In the back of his mind, he also suspected Kairi was exaggerating to try and convince him to come back. He knew Sora had been, and likely still was, in pain, but Kairi and the others were there, he had them. He didn't understand why she was so desperate for him to return, though he did feel guilty about having to constantly disappoint her.

There was also a reason he tried to ignore, because of how selfish it felt. If he went back while Sora didn't want him there he would almost certainly make things worse between them, and maybe if he stayed away right now Sora would eventually change his mind. He still didn't know why Sora was angry or upset with him, but he couldn't bare the thought of risking that getting worse, and of risking never being able to be his friend again...

He wondered often if the reason Sora asked him to leave was that he had realised how he felt, and he had been wrong about the feelings being mutual.

Wary of causing Sora to try and avoid her even more, Aqua took a different approach to the others.

Sora's arm had recovered to the point where he no longer needed to use a sling constantly, and now that he could move his hand she decided it was time for him to start working on regaining some strength and dexterity. And so, she began asking him to cook with her whenever it was her turn, under the guise of it helping his hand heal.

She knew cooking was something he used to like doing and, even in his current headspace, Sora wouldn't like saying no to a request for help. There were a lot of things he couldn't do while his grip was still so weak (chopping anything was completely out of the question) but he could help with some things.

They would move around the kitchen in silence, breaking it only to ask the other to pass something or check if they needed any help. She was determined not to force conversation on him, wondering if letting him have the choice of whether they stayed quiet or not might make this feel like a safer, or at least not unpleasant, place to be. Maybe being in someone else's presence for a while might help him start distancing himself less too.

It didn't exactly make Sora happy, but after a while, he found that doing this with Aqua did make him feel a little better, even if the feeling didn't last very long. She quickly became someone he didn't actively want to avoid, something he hadn't been expecting. Being around her didn't make him want to shut down and retreat from the oppressive noise of the world around him. He still wanted to be alone as much as possible but didn't feel the urge to leave a room the moment she walked in, unlike how he felt with everyone else.

It took four sessions of silently cooking together like this before Sora felt able to talk and ask her the question he had been thinking about ever since that first night at the castle.

"Hey, Aqua? Can I ask you something?"

"Of course Sora."

They were standing at the same bench together, a few feet apart. She looked up from the vegetables she had been slicing and found him staring down at the empty bowl before him, avoiding looking up at her. He looked as blank and despondent as he had all day, but she was hopeful.

"When you came back... what did it feel like?"

She didn't need to ask what he meant but spent a moment pondering how to answer. "At first, it was incredible. I hadn't felt that happy in so long, I think I'd forgotten what it felt like to be happy at all."

She turned to lean back against the bench, looking wistfully up at the high ceiling. "When I woke up on the beach, and you and Riku told me I was in the realm of light again... that I had come back to the light after so long in the dark, after so long being alone, it was wonderful... But that feeling didn't last forever."

He was taken aback and turned to her quickly, eyes suddenly alert, and she knew immediately her and Terra's suspicions had been correct.

"I thought being back here meant I would be happy again. I had to find Ven and Terra of course, but I thought that once we were all together again everything would feel right."

"But it didn't?"

"No. Not for a while at least. For a long time, I felt like there was something wrong with me. I didn't understand why I wasn't happy, and I felt broken."

"Really?"

"Yes. The thing was, being back in the realm of light didn't erase what had happened. Those memories and emotions... they don't just disappear." She turned to him and smiled. "It does get better though Sora."

He stared back for a few moments, then looked quickly back down at the bench, as his eyes started to sting. He wanted to believe her, but couldn't fathom ever feeling different to how he did right now. But if everything else she said was true... did that mean she had felt like this as well? It sounded a lot like this.

He opened his mouth to ask her more, but then cheery voices and laughter echoed down the hallway, and a moment later Kairi, Ven, and Terra came through the kitchen door. Sora's mouth snapped shut again and his face, which had finally been softening, hardened into its stone mask again.

Aqua sighed quietly at the terrible timing of the others. This was still progress though. It hadn't been a long conversation, but it was a start.

Almost every time Aqua and Terra had come to Scala ad Caelum Riku had been there as well. According to Mickey he was spending almost all of his time away from Disney Castle at the moment, either exploring here or hunting down leads on strange activity in other worlds, no matter how trivial or tenuous that lead was. Mickey suspected he was trying to keep himself occupied as much of the time as possible.

"Have you talked to Riku much about Sora?" Aqua asked, glancing down at Mickey.
His large round ears sagged slightly as he sighed and looked at the ground. "Not really. I've tried to, but it makes him sad..."

The two of them were standing on a small balcony overlooking the rest of the airy room, examining some of the strange contraptions lining the bookshelves. The room was somewhere between a library and a classroom, and there were several almost identical rooms in this building. Yen Sid's current theory was this was once a place of study. Aqua was using their moment away from the others to speak to Mickey without Riku being able to hear them.

"Their hearts are so deeply connected to each other, but it's almost as though it's the strength of that connection that's keeping them apart," Mickey lamented, wishing he knew how to talk to Riku about this.

"What do you mean?"

"Riku doesn't want to do anything to risk that I think, or risk causing Sora any pain, even if it means they have to be apart."

"Maybe that's how Sora feels as well," Aqua wondered out loud, looking down at the group gathered below

Terra, Riku, and Yen Sid were standing together discussing a photo Riku had taken of the strange clockwork device they had come across in one of the many open market squares of the city, with a hand-drawn map laid out on the table beside them.

Though nothing compared to the now constant look of exhaustion on Sora's face, Riku was also looking tired and despondent. The last few weeks had not been easy on him either it seemed.

"Do you think you could convince Riku to come see him?" Aqua asked hopefully. Judging by Riku's behaviour at the moment, and the nature of his departure, convincing him would be a challenge. She knew Kairi had been calling him every few days with no success. He and Mickey were also good friends though; maybe Riku would listen to him?

He smiled up at her sadly. "I'm not sure... But I'll try."

After a quick examination of Sora's Gummi phone well over a year ago, Hiro had been able to set up a connection to Chip and Dale's network, and so Baymax had been able to leave Kairi with a number to phone if she needed to contact him. She didn't know what Baymax could possibly do to help in this situation, or if he would be able to give her any advice, but she was running out of places to turn, so she called the number for the first time. When a teenage boy with black hair answered she was taken by surprise.

"Hello?

"Oh, ummm hi! I'm Kairi, I was looking for Baymax but I guess I got the wrong number sorry."

"Oh, Kairi!" he exclaimed and grinned at her. "Baymax told me about you, you're Sora's friend right?"

"Yeah!"

"I'm Hiro, uhh nice to meet you! I'm Baymax's friend." He gave her an awkward little wave which she returned with a smile as well. His grin instantly disappeared though. "Is something wrong? Is Sora OK?"

"Actually that's what I was calling about, is Baymax there?"

"Yeah, of course, I'll get him for you."

A moment later Baymax appeared before the camera and waved. "Hello, it is nice to meet you, I am Baymax."

"Huh? Baymax it's me, Kairi."

"Oh sorry!" Hiro's face popped into frame again as he grabbed Baymax by the arm. "Wrong Baymax!" He dragged the robot away and an identical one replaced him.

"Hello Kairi. How may I be of assistance?"

"Uhh... hi Baymax," she said hesitantly, a little confused. "Sorry to bother you."

"Please do not worry, I am here to help."

"Thanks." She smiled at her friend and pushed her previous confusion aside. Just seeing his face was enough to make her feel a little better. "It's about Sora, I'm worried about him..."

Not fully understanding what was happening herself, she found explaining what was going on difficult, but she did her best to describe Sora's recent state and behaviour, and just how out of character it was for him. Baymax listened to her carefully.

"... it might be nothing, he might just be angry at us all about something, but I wanted to call in case there could be some other reason."

"These changes are concerning. Concussions can cause mood changes and this may explain his behaviour. He may also be experiencing ongoing emotional impact from being injured and events while he was in the other world, as it was a traumatic experience."

"Oh, alright," Kairi said in a small voice, her mind suddenly far away. She'd already wondered if this was related to what he had been through in Quadratum. Baymax was right, it had been traumatic, that was obvious, particularly since Sora's nightmares had been bad for so long. He'd said they were gone now but she didn't entirely believe him. If it was about what happened there though then why wouldn't he talk to her and Riku about it more? He'd already opened up about it before, why would he now close off again if it was still hurting him? If it was part of his physical injuries as well though she had no idea what to do, but that still didn't explain why he was cutting them off.

"I still don't understand why he won't talk to us... He's acting like he hates me." Her voice was strained as she stared dejectedly at the ground. She doubted Baymax could do anything with this information, but she was at a loss for what to do.

Hiro hadn't been able to stop himself from listening out of concern for Sora, and now he poked his head around the side of the screen. "Ummm Kairi? Sorry for eves-dropping, but I had a thought."

"Yeah?" Kairi looked up quickly, hopeful again.

"Well, it's just... I don't know what happened to Sora while he was missing, but it sounds like it was really difficult, and what you were saying about how Sora has been trying to be alone all the time, it reminded me of something... About a year ago my brother passed away."

"Oh! I'm so sorry Hiro," Kairi gasped. She couldn't even imagine how painful that must have been. "That must have been awful."

"Thanks," he said with a sad smile. "Yeah, it was. That probably seems like a really weird thing to tell someone you only just met! But I'm bringing it up because after it happened I was really miserable, which I guess isn't surprising, but I started trying to push everyone away as well, kind of like what Sora's doing."

"Really?"

"Yeah. My friends wanted to help, but I didn't want to see them and I just stayed in my room. Everything I'd been excited about doing before, like going to the University my brother went to, I just didn't want to do anymore because doing anything at all felt really hard. I thought I wanted to be by myself, and I didn't like it when my friends tried to talk to me or help me. I was wondering... maybe Sora is feeling like that too?"

Kairi stared at him, eyes round as she listened intently.

"I just wanted to tell you that because, I don't think Sora hates you or is angry with you, and I didn't want you to think that either. He probably misses you a lot more than he realises."

She beamed at him. "Thank you Hiro." His words meant a lot to her and gave her a little more hope. "What made you want to see your friends and do things again?"

"Oh, uhhh... Well, I found Baymax and then we kind of discovered a conspiracy where someone was using the microbots I made to try and- actually don't worry, long story! But I was pretty much forced to stop hiding..." He shrugged awkwardly. "I'm not really much help there sorry."

Kairi couldn't help giggling a little, despite everything. "Thanks so much, Hiro," she said gratefully. "This was still helpful, and it was really nice to meet you!"

"You too Kairi, I hope Sora starts feeling better soon. I don't know if there's any way Baymax or I could help, but let me know if there is anything we can do."

"I will, bye!"

"I'm sorry Sora, but I don't feel comfortable using magic on your arm right now," Aqua told Sora firmly.

She and Terra had just returned from their most recent trip to Scala ad Caelum and found him sitting in the kitchen alone, staring blankly at the half-drunk coffee on the table in front of him. He was looking a little gaunt compared to when they had left, and Aqua wondered when he had last eaten.

He had asked her about his arm when they joined him at the table, but right now he looked so fatigued that she thought healing magic might do just as much harm as good. Sora wasn't sure if he was even disappointed though. He knew why she had said no, and hadn't really expected her to say yes. He wasn't even sure why he had asked. It was like he was just going through the motions. Even though his ribs were mostly healed by now, a deep constant ache in his chest remained.

He nodded slowly. "OK."

"Are you feeling sick at all?" she asked. He looked awfully ill and when she reached out and placed the back of her hand on his forehead she was sure he had a mild fever.

It was over two weeks since Riku had left now, and the amount Sora seemed to have deteriorated since then was staggering. While she and Terra expected Riku's departure had accelerated this, they were sure it wasn't the true cause.

"No, I'm fine, just tired as usual," he said and attempted a smile. "Still feels a bit like I'll be tired forever."

"Baymax said it would take quite a while for you to get your energy back," Terra reminded him kindly.

"Yeah, that's true." It wasn't exactly what Sora had meant though. He knew he'd physically be less tired if he let himself sleep more, but it wasn't just a physical thing. He just felt... tired, tired of all of this. He didn't know how to explain it. He tried to smile at them, then stood up. "Thanks anyway Aqua, I'll see you guys later."

As the door closed behind him Terra gave Aqua a serious look. "We've got to do something Aqua."

She sighed. "I don't think there's anything we can do until he wants us to help. He's started talking a little bit about it with me, but I need to wait and let him do that at his own pace."

"Do you think it's safe to keep waiting for that though?"

They sat in silence, the weight of Terra's words hanging heavy in the air.

After speaking with Hiro and Baymax that morning Kairi was determined to find some way to reach out to Sora, something that might convince him to let her back in so that she could help.

She'd never sent him any of her letters before, but this seemed like a good time to start. He wouldn't speak to her anymore, but maybe he'd give her words a chance if they were on paper instead. More likely he'd ignore the letter the same way he ignored her attempts to talk to him and just throw it away, but it was worth a try. Now she just had to try and put her thoughts into words...

I don't know why you don't want to talk to any of us, but whatever the reason is, it's OK. No matter what is going on, I want to be here for you.

No, that's not right...

I'm not sure if I've done something wrong, or if you feel like you can't talk to me for some reason, but I want you to know that no matter what I'm always here, and I will always want to be here for you.

That doesn't sound right either...

I know you're sad Sora, I know you're hurting, and after everything that has happened, it makes sense. But please let me help. Please let us back in. We just want you to feel better.

A few tears fell onto the paper, smudging her last words and she cursed quietly as she wiped them away. While she waited for the tears to stop, she stared out across the pond she was sitting beside, out to the mountains and forest she had yet to venture far into. She'd been hoping she, Ven, Riku, and Sora could all go explore them together sometime. She turned back to her paper.

We don't want to lose you, and it feels like we are.
Is there anything I can do to help? I don't know what to do, please just tell me what can I do?

He might not even know that though...

I know you want to be alone right now, and that's why you wont talk to me, but please let me try and help.

All she could manage right now were these drabbles and pleas. How was she ever going to turn this into a coherent letter...

She looked up suddenly at the sound of footsteps and Sora rounded the corner, as he trudged slowly down the path away from the castle. His hands were deep in his jacket pockets and he had his hood pulled up, the way he often wore it these days. She wondered if having it up like this was his way of trying to shut out even more of the world around him.

"Sora?"

He stopped dead as he caught sight of her, and even from where she sat she could see his body tense up. They stared at each other for a moment, Sora feeling a horrible tightness in his chest, wishing he'd seen her sooner so he could have turned and gotten away before she noticed him.

She stood up, hugging her notepad and unfinished letter to her chest. Sora was trying to decide if it would be better to ignore her and keep walking, or stay and try to end the conversation as quickly as possible. As she took a step towards him though he felt his legs move automatically, as he turned and began to walk briskly back up the path, heart racing. Today had been bad enough already, and everything always felt worse in the evenings. He couldn't do this right now.

"Sora, please wait!"

She ran after him and he sped up, desperately hoping she would give up quickly. But she was determined this time, she wasn't going to let him rebuff her again. She couldn't let this keep happening.

"You've got to talk to me Sora, please!" She'd caught up to him by now, but stayed several paces behind.

"Leave me alone Kairi," he said flatly, no hint of emotion in his voice.

"No, I'm not going to, I'm not going to let you keep doing this!"

He kept walking, wishing he was anywhere but here.

"Sora please, stop!"

If he could just get back inside, surely she'd give up then.

"Just talk to me Sora!"

He stopped abruptly, so abruptly she almost crashed into him, and then took a few steps back in surprise. He was motionless, but inside his head a storm was brewing. He was sick of this, he couldn't take being out here with her any longer, but he had to try and calm down before he said something he'd regret...

She took his silence as a sign he was listening and felt a rush of cautious hope. "Sora I know you're hurting right now, but you can't keep shutting us out like this. Please let me help."

He turned his head slightly and she could just see a slither of his face past the edge of his hood. His eyes were in shadow, and she couldn't make out his expression.

"I don't need your help Kairi, just leave me alone."

He started walking again, and she cried out in desperation.

"Please Sora! This isn't like you!"

"Well guess what Kairi?" He spun back with a look in his eyes that scared her and threw his hands out to his sides as he yelled. "Maybe I'm not the person I used to be anymore! Maybe this is what I am now! Please," he looked away, "just stay away from me."

"But Sora-"

He turned and strode away, back up the path towards the castle. She stayed where she was. As he turned the corner into the courtyard she dropped to her knees and began sobbing, at her wit's end, and terrified.