Natsu usually knew when he was dreaming.

It was a thing Zeref was always jealous of, since once he did a study about dreams and found that it was pretty rare to control your dreaming. Natsu remembered the time he told Zeref that he could pause and rewind his dreams, his brother's eyes nearly popped out of his head.

So, the fact that he didn't know he was dreaming now was downright unnatural for him.

Zeref and he were young, which was the first of many red flags he'd missed. Zeref was a good six inches taller than Natsu, which was another red flag because Natsu stood a proud four inches taller than his older brother as an adult, but all of that went right over his head.

Because Zeref was here. They were playing, and he was teasing him like he always did. Zeref hardly responded, only smiled fondly at his younger, silly brother. Igneel and Grandeeney were quite new to them at this age, but that didn't matter, and never did. Igneel was his father the moment Natsu laid eyes on him, and Grandeeney was always his mom. It just took them longer to find them.

"C'mon Zef, you're no fun!" Natsu whined, his high-pitched voice doing nothing to warn the pink haired man that this was only his unconscious imagination. Instead, he just watched as his older brother rolled his eyes.

"Not rising to it," Zeref repeated, his lips curling into a subtle smirk.

"That's right, son," Igneel laughed loudly, and Zeref beamed. "Don't let him get to ya!"

"Hey, old man!" Natsu reeled on his father, throwing harmless punches at his stomach. "This ain't your battle! So, back off - I'mma take him down!"

"Oh, are you now?" Grandeeney joined in as she came from the kitchen to place a platter of food on the picnic table in their garden, her eyes bright. "Then I suppose all this food I cooked will go to waste."

"Food?" Natsu stopped his ministrations immediately and ran to the picnic table. He could hear his father and brother laugh but his senses were overtaken by the smell of chicken.

"Of course," Zeref teased as he sat down in front of his brother at the table, his dark eyes sparkling with amusement. "You never could quite concentrate when there was food involved."

Natsu looked up in confusion, his mouth full of chicken as his blinked at his brother "Concentrate on what?"

His family laughed again and Natsu couldn't help but think he had ever felt so happy.

That was until voices started to ring in his ears.

"Thanks, Natsu – So, we'll see you on Friday?"

Natsu perked up and looked at Zeref. Zeref was quietly eating his chicken, but he never spoke with his mouth full – He had always chided Natsu for doing so. He was about to ask what he'd said when another voice rang in his ears.

"You got it, bro. I'll be there bright and early. I'll call you tomorrow, too."

"Who was that?" he asked, and his family's eyes shot to him.

"Who was what?" Grandeeney asked.

"I look forward to it."

"That!" Natsu stood up, and Zeref's eyes were wide on him. "You look forward to what?"

Zeref's expression slowly changed. One minute he was a young, carefree young boy, the next he looked – Older. His expression was sombre as looked at his younger brother sadly. "It's okay, Natsu."

Natsu felt an oddly familiar, sickly feeling squeezing his chest.

"Huh?" He asked stupidly. Zeref just smiled.

"It's okay." He repeated, not moving from his seat.

"N-no," Natsu said, realising his voice was normal again. "It – it's not – "

"It wasn't your fault." His brother told him, his voice never wavering. Natsu shook his head so hard he felt dizzy.

"No. No it'll never be - " Natsu stopped when the voices cut him off as he watched his brother's face.

"Love you, Zef."

"I love you too, Natsu."

"Love you, Uncle Natsu!"

"Love ya, Haru – Bye Mavis!"

"Bye!"

Natsu woke with a start, his damp shirt clung to him, and his sheets were damp with sweat. The nightmare rolled over him as he lay there for a moment, shivering. Eventually, his senses kicked back in, and he was acutely aware of his nephew crying.

He looked over the baby monitor beside his bed. It was 6 AM, so Lucy must have gotten up with Haru at four. Said baby was awake and squirming in his cot and Natsu felt heart rate quicken at the sight of him. The sound of a door opening made the pink-haired man jump from his bed, detangling the sheets from his legs as he went for the door.

Natsu met Lucy on the landing, halfway to Haru's room. He noted she looked tired, her hair falling from her bun at her neck and her eyes heavy and rimmed. Guilt washed over him.

"I'm sorry," He started quickly. "I was meant to get up with him all last night."

Lucy smiled tiredly and waved him off. "You always get up with him, even when it isn't your turn. You needed rest."

Natsu smiled but Haru's cries alerted him back into action. "Go back to bed – I got it. You take the morning for yourself, kay?"

Lucy hesitated. "But… You need help – "

"I can definitely handle it for the morning," he assured her with a smile. "At least relax until 10 – "

"9."

Natsu chuckled. "Sure. Go to bed."

Lucy nodded, hiding her yawn behind her hand. "Alright – Wake me if you need me?"

"You got it."

He watched as Lucy turned before making his way into his nephew's room. Haru's cries attacked his ears as he bent down to pick up the squirming baby.

"Alright, alright, easy buddy," He murmured soothingly. Haru's cries quieted into whimpers, like they always did whenever he or Lucy held him.

"You're uncomfy, huh?" He asked lightly as he rested the baby onto the changing table and changed him only a little clumsily. He had gotten much better at changing diapers in the last two days. When he was done, he dressed the baby warmly, aware of the slight chill in the house, and brought the infant back to his chest.

"We gotta put the heating on and get you fed, don't we?" He asked the baby as he made his way from the room. "Yes, we do."

He bumped the temperature up with the controls at the bottom of the stairs before making his way into the kitchen. He didn't like putting Haru down when he made the bottle and had gotten pretty good at doing it with one hand. He remembered being bewildered when he watched Zeref and Mavis handle that, but it was quickly becoming second nature.

"Okay, here we go buddy," he said as he settled onto the couch and put the bottle to the infant's lips. Haru could be a little fussy, but he remembered Mavis teaching him to drip a few drops of milk onto the baby's lips before feeding him which would make him open his mouth eagerly for more. The memory stung now.

Haru was quiet when he fed, but when he was wide awake, he looked up at Natsu with those big green eyes. Natsu stared back – it was hard, but he felt like he owed it to Haru to be able to watch him back. He couldn't not look at his nephew just because he reminded him so much of his dead brother.

Natsu couldn't hide his wince when the thought struck him. He was so numb, but every now and then the thoughts of reality would hit him so hard it hurt. He was in pain. And he didn't even get to fully feel the loss as he had his brother's baby to raise.

He pushed that thought away. He refused to be bitter about Haru – If anything, this was a gift. He got to keep this little piece of his brother, forever. He would be the most important man in Haru's life. He had to do right by him, and by his brother.

The dream stuck in his brain all morning. Natsu had never believed in ghosts, the afterlife or anything else of the sort, but that dream felt far too real. He supposed it could just be because he knew his brother so well, and he liked that thought. But the dream felt more important, somehow. More… intentional. Like Zeref really couldn't stand the thought of Natsu blaming himself.

But what if I am to blame? He thought, his mind whirring with a familiar terror. What if the heater malfunctioned. He knew Zeref would never forget to turn it off, so if it really was the cause of the fire…

Natsu distracted himself later in the morning playing with Haru. He had him laid out of his play mat in the living room and relished in the sounds of his baby giggles as he blew raspberries on the baby's stomach. It made it so easy to forget everything that was wrong.

"And…" He extended the word as he slowly lowered himself over the giggling baby before. "Brrr!"

Haru's giggles filled the air and mixed with Lucy's musical laugh. He looked up to find her looking refreshed. He was happy to see that she had obviously had a bath and spent a little time getting ready for the day.

Mavis had always told him that Lucy enjoyed long baths and taking her time getting ready. But ever since she had moved in, she had been too scared to have a bath or take her time since she worried about leaving Haru alone. It made him happy that she was clearly trusted Natsu to take good care of him while she relaxed.

"You two look like you're having fun," she said as she settled on the floor by his side. Natsu chuckled.

"Yeah, we have fun. Right, bud?" Haru laughed again and the two adults joined in.

"Thank you for taking him this morning," she added, her eyes kind and Natsu felt a start as his met hers. "I – I needed that."

Natsu stared a moment before grinning. "No prob."

Lucy just laughed and took over Natsu's previous ministrations, Haru's giggles filling the air again. Natsu couldn't have fought a smile even if he wanted to.

The morning was calm before a lilting voice alerted the two new guardians.

"Hey, hey!" Natsu and Lucy looked up as the front door opened. Grandeeney, Igneel, Silver and Ur all pooled into the house. Lucy scooped up the baby as she and Natsu stood.

"Hey guys," Natsu greeted, giving his parents a quick hug.

"Hello darling," Grandeeney rested a hand on his cheek before greeting Lucy. "Hello, my dear, and how's my favourite grandson?"

Lucy smiled as she placed Haru into Grandeeney's waiting arms. The older woman cooed at the baby, who was still giggling from the previous play.

"How was last night?" Igneel asked as he always did.

"Smooth sailing," Natsu reported. "Haru's great. Like nothing ever…"

He trailed off with a shrug and Igneel squeezed his shoulder comfortingly.

"Well, he looks just delightful," Ur commented as she held the baby's tiny hand. Silver nodded in agreement.

"He sure is," He rumbled, his voice on the edge of a laugh. "He sure is happy with you two."

Natsu felt his face heat up and saw Lucy's do the same. "Well – We – "

"We're just teasing, kid," Ur punched his shoulder lightly. He rolled his eyes and nodded.

"You know, you guys don't have to check in so early," he commented, as he noted the clock reading 9:05 AM.

"We want to," Grandeeney interjected, holding Haru closer. "We need to. He makes it – "

She cut off. Natsu found himself feeling glad she did.

"Well, anyway," Lucy started, breaking the silence. "Why don't you all take a seat. I'll make some tea."

"No, you relax, kid." Ur nudged Lucy towards the living room with everyone else. "You need more rest than us. I'll grab the tea."

Lucy smiled gratefully and sat on one of the couches. Grandeeney, Igneel and Silver sat on the opposing one, Haru now tucked into Igneel's massive arms.

"We did need to talk to you both," Grandeeney started when Natsu took a seat beside Lucy. "It's about…"

"It's about Zeref and Mavis." Igneel finished for her.

Natsu felt Lucy stiffen beside him. Before he could cut them off, Igneel went on.

"The funeral home is ready for us to go… see them." His dad managed, the words catching gruffly. He cleared his throat before going on. "We were gonna go later today to see them together."

It was silent for a few tense moments before, to Natsu's disbelief, Lucy nodded in the corner of his eye. "Alright."

"Alright?" He choked out. Lucy's pained eyes met his.

"We can't avoid it forever," she said gently. He opened his mouth to respond when his mother spoke again.

"The funeral will be in a little over a week," she told them and Natsu could hear a ringing in his ears. "But it would be nice for us to see them before."

"Nice?" Natsu repeated in disbelief as he stood. Lucy stood beside him warily.

"Natsu," Igneel started sadly.

"No!" Natsu snapped. He felt a flash of guilt when Haru started to whimper, but he couldn't stop. "No, why are you actin' like this is alright? This isn't alright!"

"Natsu," He feels Lucy's palm begin to press to his shoulder, but he stepped away, his head shaking.

"No, I can't – I can't deal with this right now." He tried. "I – No."

He turned and made his way from the room, ripping the front door and slamming it behind him. He felt more guilt flood over him as he heard Haru's faint screams fade away from behind him. He straddled his bike and without even bothering to put his helmet on,

He left.

Natsu didn't know where he was going until the road turned the dirt. He nearly turned back when burnt, dead trees came into the view, but he pressed on.

The cottage had collapsed, he noted as he climbed off his bike. The wood that hadn't burnt away had obviously gotten too weak from the fire. He stood his bike up on the stand and buried his hands in his pockets as he edged closer, his cold breath clouding his vision as the cold air nipped at his ears.

He faintly recalled Erza mentioning that the cottage belonged to him, Lucy and Haru. He wondered idly what they'd do with it. Would they sell the land? Build another cottage there for Haru? Build another cottage there and sell it?

The thought of someone living on the place where his brother and his wife took their lasts breath left a bad taste in his mouth. He didn't know how long he had been pondering the possible outcomes before voices sounded behind him.

"Oi, Ash for brains."

Weirdly, Natsu felt a flash of relief when Gray called him the dumb nickname. Him and Gajeel referring him to 'Natsu' had been starting to freak him out. He turned to find Gray and Gajeel making their way over to him, their own bikes parked beside his.

"Thought we'd find ya here," Gajeel muttered gruffly, clearly uncomfortable as his eyes scanned the remains of the cottage. Natsu didn't know what to say.

"How did you know I'd gone?" He asked eventually. Gray shrugged and kicked the ground.

"Your Dad called Gajeel, mine called me." He explained, his stormy eyes hardening. "Why'd you run off?"

Natsu thought about biting back with a smart-ass comment, like he always did, to give himself a bit of normalcy. The words caught in his throat when he realised that wouldn't do him any good.

"I – I just – " He looked away in frustration. "I needed a minute. I got – "

"Overwhelmed?" Gajeel offered and Natsu found himself nodding firmly.

"Yeah," he breathed. "Yeah, exactly."

"That's… very understandable." Gray added and Natsu felt his chest tighten.

"They," He started before clearing his throat. "They said Mavis and Zeref are…"

"They're ready." Gray finished for him again. Natsu clenched his jaw but nodded. Why couldn't he finish him own damn sentence?

"You're not ready?" Gray asked and Natsu laughed dryly.

"I could never be ready for this." He bit back harshly. Gajeel just shrugged.

"Then now's as good a time as any." He rumbled and Natsu stared at him.

"I – I guess it is." He murmured, his eyes wandering to his feet.

"it's just – " he began again, feeling frustrated at his inability to speak. "I feel so much – pressure. I have to raise Haru. I have to raise him and make him… a person. Someone good and strong. This - This Dad this, that was Zeref's thing; it was never mine! And now I'm his… He's mine and I'm raising his with the girl I hardly…"

He trailed off, but felt some weight coming off his chest as he finished. It was quiet for a long moment before Gray spoke.

"She's nice, huh?"

Natsu's head snapped up. He blinked at Gray a moment.

"Lucy?" Gray only nodded. "She – Yeah. Yeah, she's great. She's awesome with Haru, and she's… good. She's a good person."

"I know," Gray agreed. "She's good friends with Juvia so I've met her a few times. I always thought she'd get on with you."

"Same here," Gajeel rumbled again, his lips pulling up in a smirk. "She's buddies with Levy too but we always said you and here would get along. You're both pretty weird."

Natsu scoffed but found himself laughing. "Weird is a good word for her."

"And you," Gray added and the three laughed.

"Thanks," Natsu whispered. "I knew I had good friends but this… This has been so – I don't know what I would have done. I really don't"

He couldn't say more. He couldn't even put into words how grateful he was for them, how much they had saved him these last few days. And here they were – Saving him, again. It felt like he hadn't said enough, but when he looked up, he saw it.

They knew.

"C'mon man," Gajeel stepped forward and slapped a hand to his back. "Let's get ya home – I wanna annoy my nephew."

"You'd better not," Natsu grumbled as they made their way back to their bikes. "He slept pretty good last night, so no windin' him up."

"Fucking hell, I never thought I'd see the day," Gray laughed and Gajeel chuckled.

"Shut up!"

When Natsu closed the front door behind him, he was met with silence. His parents and their friend's must have left. He made his way into the living room to find Lucy on the floor on the play mat, just like he was this morning, playing with Haru. She looked up slowly when he entered.

"Hi," she breathed lightly. Natsu felt guilt settling in his stomach again.

"Hey," he murmured. He looked around. "Where did everyone go?"

"Your parents just left," she told him as she scooped Haru up and stood. She made her way over to the cot in the corner of the room as she continued. "They seemed really tired. Their friends left a little after you did."

"I see," he responded quietly. They stood there silently before he spoke up. "I'm sorry."

Lucy only tilted her head.

"I shouldn't have left the way I did," he rubbed the back of his neck. "And I shouldn't have slammed the door. I just – I was really surprised. I'm still not – "

"I know," Lucy spoke so quietly he nearly didn't hear her. "You don't need to explain. I totally understand. If you needed a minute to process things, then that's what you need. You never need to apologise for that."

Natsu's chest stirred at he looked at her eyes, so unwaveringly on his own. He shook his head slowly. "Thank you. And if you ever need a minute, you know I will always understand too, right?"

His chest squeezed again as her lips pulled up in smile as she nodded. "Right. Thank you. I know this is new. I know we're new for the both of us, so rules like that and boundaries are good."

Natsu nodded, feeling more weight lift off him at her words. "I couldn't agree more."

"So, let's just keep taking it one day at a time, and if one of us needs something: We tell them. We'll set any rules or boundaries that makes us feel more comfortable and helps this process continue more easily."

Natsu smiled genuinely and closed his eyes as he hung his head. "I'd really like that. Thank you."

"No prob," she smiled cheekily and Natsu found himself really laughing as she quoted him.

"So," he took a deep breath. "What time did my parent's say?"

Lucy's eye's clouded almost immediately. "1 PM."

"Alright," He murmured. "We should ask Ur and Silver to mind Haru. He – He shouldn't…"

"I agree," Lucy said lightly and Natsu smiled weakly at her.

"Okay. I'll look after Haru if you want to get ready or… prepare. Then I'll get ready too."

Lucy nodded and stepped forward. He frowned in confusion till he felt pressure on his fingertips. He closed his eyes and squeezed her hand back as she brushed past him. Only when he heard her door shut upstairs did he open his eyes make his way over to his nephew.