CHAPTER THIRTEEN

A few days later Mike was in the at sea cabin with Tom. They were discussing the plan as they neared Norfolk. Managing a docking ship, and the leave of personnel on the ship, along with restocking orders and who was to work during the stay.

They were working on a schedule so that all crew members that wanted down time with family in the area would be able to have it. They split the enlisted sailors into different groups so that there were always enough sailors still on duty to help with repairs and restocking of the ship. They also worked the officer schedule with some officers getting more time than others, for various reasons.

"And that leaves me and you," Tom said with a yawn.

"Take all the time you want, Tom," Mike said scratching the back of his neck. "I'll take the ship while we are in port."

"You don't want any time away from the ship?" Tom asked surprised.

"To do what?" Mike fired back with a shrug.

"Mike," Tom said in that fatherly tone he had. Mike tried to hide the pain and sadness he was feeling about being back in Norfolk. Memories of his lost family were thick. He knew Andrea was feeling the same way. He had held her again last night as she cried, and before she was done, he was crying too.

"It's not a big deal. I don't have anyone to see so I'll just busy myself on the ship. Duty keeps me going."

"You want to talk about it?" Tom offered.

"It's not really something I allow myself to indulge in," he lied flawlessly. He just wasn't ready to share his grief with Tom, partly because he didn't want Tom to have that on his shoulders too. He had enough to deal with while off the ship. "They're either out there somewhere, or they are gone. I know Christine most likely isn't looking for me and doesn't want anything to do with me."

"Do you want some time to look for them?"

"Look where?" Mike replied with a shrug. He knew Tom could read him and was probably seeing the sadness and depression that lay just under his surface. But in reality, he was already working on those issues with Andrea. He knew in the long run…he would be just fine.

"I'm sorry, Mike," Tom said sincerely, and Mike knew if Tom Chandler could fix this…he would. And Mike appreciated that about his friend. Mike nodded slowly to show that.

"I'm not the only one that lost family," Mike replied with a small smile, thinking about Andrea specifically, but other crew members as well.

"You talking with someone about it?" Tom asked. Mike wondered if Tom was getting suspicious.

"I'm making do," Mike said evasively. He just wasn't ready to divulge his relationship with Andrea to his friend right now…mostly because his best friend…was also the captain of this ship and what Mike and Andrea were doing? Was technically against the rules. "You going to tell the kids about Rachel?" Mike asked to deflect attention back to Tom.

Mike saw Tom reel a little from his question and then the other man blew out a breath. He watched Tom think about his answer to that question, there was a lot going on in those stormy blue eyes and Mike knew to just sit back and wait him out. He did raise an eyebrow at his friend.

"Yes. I just don't know how to tell them. I don't know…"

"Be honest with them," Mike said cutting him off. "It's not going to be easy, but your kids love you, and if you're not straight forward with them it will cause more issues. Just break the news and let them dictate the conversation."

"I suppose. I'm not sure how they'll take her staying with us."

"Then make that decision. Do you want her with you there?"

"Yes," came Tom's replied with no hesitation. Mike smiled.

"You're in deep," Mike said as a chuckle escaped. Tom glared at him. "Like I said tell them straight on. It'll be easier in the long run."

"Yeah, it's been nice lately," Tom replied with a sigh. He watched Tom think about something a small smile playing on his lips. Tom then visibly shook himself and looked at Mike. "You sure you don't want leave, Mike?"

"Take the time and spend it with your kids, Tom. I don't have that luxury anymore," Mike replied, and he could hear the sadness in his own voice.

"I wish I could make it better," Tom said. Mike nodded knowing his friend meant every word of that.

"Maybe someday, but today it is what it is. Anything else we need to discuss?"

"No, other than I'll take the night watch until we reach port."

"Sounds like a deal to me," Mike replied, his mood brightening. That meant he and Andrea would have the nights together. Mike moved towards the door, but he stopped and looked back over his shoulder at Tom again. "I'm glad you're finding happiness again, Tom."

With that Mike opened the hatch and left the at sea cabin. With Tom taking the overnight he knew Tom would be taking a few hours in the afternoon to rest. Mike would be in command. He decided to get a quick bite to eat in the wardroom, hoping that Andrea might be doing the same thing. Instead, he found Green and Burk eating. Mike grabbed a sandwich to go not feeling like socializing and headed for the deck.

The weather was good, so Mike found a spot to rest as he ate his sandwich. He was thinking about home, his kids, what was going to be missing, Andrea, and what she could provide while they were docked, and everything else that was going on. A shadow crossed in front of him, and he looked up to see Russ Jeter standing next to him.

"Master Chief," Mike greeted.

"XO," Russ replied with a nod. "Got a minute or two?"

"I'm due back on the bridge soon, but I've got some time to spare. What can I do for you?"

"I just wanted to check in with you. See how you were holding up."

"I'm fine, thank you, Master Chief," Mike said with a forced smile.

"I know you lost your son, and the rest of you family is missing," Jeter continued quietly, his steady eyes probing Mike. Mike sighed and looked down at his hands briefly.

"It's been a tough ride for all of us."

"Yes, Sir, and you're really good at deflecting to others, but who's taking care of you?" Jeter asked. Mike's brain flashed on Andrea, and he fought to keep the grin off his face.

"I'm doing alright, Russ," Mike said softening his voice, signaling to Jeter that this conversation could go more informal. Mike's shoulders sagged a fraction.

"I'm sure, but sometimes it helps to talk about it. I've experienced great loss in my life too…from before. I know how it can consume you," Jeter replied quietly. Mike studying his friend's face.

"I miss my kids. I mean I always miss my kids while on ship, but it's different now. They won't be there in two days when we hit port."

"No, they won't."

"They won't ever be there, at least not Lucas for sure. I don't know about my girls…but I've a feeling they're gone too."

"I'm sorry, Mike," Jeter replied.

"Me too. Lucas was a special boy. He…he struggled sometimes, especially at school, but he was so smart in some areas. He liked alligators," Mike said with a sad smile.

"Some kids are like that," Jeter replied, his hand coming to rest gently on Mike's shoulder.

"He was so upset when he found out I was leaving in June. We weren't supposed to deploy yet. We were supposed to go camping the next weekend. He ran…he hid in a tree, and I had to…I caught him when he jumped down," Mike said as the memory surfaced. He felt the burn of tears and blinked. "Some days I can't believe it. That their gone. I think I'm dreaming and I'm going to wake up."

"A lot feel that way."

"But the nightmare never ends," Mike breathed out and Jeter squeezed his shoulder.

"Someday it will be bearable," Jeter replied. "Talking about them helps."

"I know, Russ. I really am good, when I tell you that. I've done my share of grieving."

"That's good. I was hoping you had. You're the type of person to hold onto it all."

"I know, but I learned recently that it's better if you let go," Mike replied. Jeter cocked his head to the side and gave Mike a curious look. Mike held his emotions in check and waited the other man out.

"Good," Jeter finally responded. "I'm always available if you need an ear."

"Thanks, Russ," Mike said. Jeter looked like he had more to say but was hesitant to express it. Mike frowned. "Something else on your mind, Russ?"

"Maybe," Russ sighed. "There's talk amongst the crew."

"Scuttlebutt?" Mike asked with raised eyebrows.

"Yes…about the captain," Russ replied.

"Oh," Mike replied, his turn to sigh. "I can guess the subject matter."

"Dr. Scott," Russ replied with a nod. "There's talk of their relationship and regulations."

"Who's talking?" Mike asked. Russ hesitated. "It's okay, I'm not going to seek them out. I just want a feel for the playing field before I make decisions."

"Green is not a fan of what the captain is doing. He is the loudest. There are a few more."

"Foster?"

"No, actually. Foster seems to be routing for him."

"Not surprising," Mike mumbled. "What's the feel of the crew?"

"Seems there are more routing for our good captain than against him. But I feel he may be disregarding rules."

"Russ, it's a new world," Mike said softly, thinking of his own rule bending with Garnett. Luckily, they were not the subject of scuttlebutt…yet.

"Then maybe the captain should make new rules known," Russ said setting his jaw.

"Which camp are you, Russ?" Mike asked. He watched uncertainty flash through his friend's eyes.

"As the Master Chief or as Russ his friend?"

"Yes," Mike replied with a smile. Russ nodded slowly, putting his thoughts in order.

"As Master Chief I must protest. Fraternization rules are there for a reason," Jeter replied, and Mike felt the urge to cringe, holding his features emotionless. "As his friend...I think he deserves to be happy."

"And so is the conundrum," Mike smiled. Russ nodded.

"I'm still bound to my duty, XO," Russ said.

"I know. It's a delicate line," Mike breathed out. He took a deep breath. "I suppose you need to do what you need to do. I'll keep my finger on the pulse."

"Thank you, Sir, as will I," Russ replied.

He checked his watch. "I need to get back to the bridge."

To Be Continued…