Trigger Warning: PTSD; Electrocution

Day Seven
The Way You Shake and Shiver
Shaking Hands | Seizures | Silent Panic Attack

Bucky Barnes didn't like electricity.

Actually, that wasn't completely true. If the electricity was nice and contained in a lightbulb or a television, then fine. He would always be wary of it, but he wouldn't rebel against it. He wasn't quite to the point of wanting to live in a cabin off the grid and rely on candles and campfires. At 2:00am when he couldn't sleep, he certainly appreciated being able to microwave that frozen burrito from the back of his freezer that he had no recollection of actually buying.

But, any kind of free ranging electricity always made him anxious. He went out of his way to stay inside when there were thunderstorms. Whenever he helped Sam work on his family's boat, Bucky would steer very clear of anything that had to do with the generator. Even just a static shock on the doorknob in his apartment would have him backtracking and climbing out the window rather than use that door.

So, when the battle shifted to an area with several electricity pylons, he was already on edge. Perhaps that was how his opponents were able to get the best of him.

"Bucky, look out!" Sam called out to him too late.

He wasn't even quite sure what hit him. All he knew is that he was suddenly flying through the air, grasping around for anything that might at least slow him down. And then there was an impact. And Bucky had no time to even process that impact when he felt the hot, searing electricity enter through his left shoulder and all logical thought was gone.

It felt like he was burning from the inside out. Every atom in his body screamed and vibrated so violently that it felt like they might come apart.

"Wipe him and start over."

Searing pain took over his whole body, so much so that his vision completely whited out. All his muscles were completely locked and he wasn't even sure if he were still breathing.

"Wipe him."

He was somehow drowning and burning at the same time. Nothing outside of the excruciating pain existed anymore. All that was left in the world was him and this agony.

"And start over."

Suddenly, the searing heat dulled and his muscles went from feeling like steel rods to feeling like melting jello. His muscles were suddenly spasming out of control, each twitch pulsating pain through his body. He gasped for breath as his brain spiraled wildly out of control.

"You are to be the new fist of HYDRA."

His body no longer belonged to him. All he knew was searing pain. This was all he would ever be.

"Bucky? Buck?! Can you hear me?"

The world blurred and swung disorientingly around him. But he was suddenly aware of a firm hand on his right shoulder. It wasn't pushing him down, rather gripping his shoulder in a show of support rather than dominance.

"Bucky?!"

"Sam?" Bucky murmured.

"Shit, man, you scared the hell outta me."

Slowly, reality started coming back to him. He was laying on his back, his muscles still spasming at odd intervals. He felt like he got run over by a truck and then the truck had backed up and parked on top of him. The worst of it was definitely his left shoulder, which felt like there was a hot poker still skewered through his muscles and resting in his bones. He was gasping shallowly for breath and his heart was beating so hard that it felt like it was trying to drill through his ribcage.

"You still with me, Buck?" Sam asked, looking down at him worriedly.

"Wipe him and start over."

"What…" Bucky murmured, still trying to sort out what was real and what wasn't.

"You got thrown into one of the pylons," Sam told him. "You got stuck there and got electrocuted pretty bad before I was able to get you out. But you're out now. You're gonna be okay."

Bucky let his head fall to one side, distantly taking in the wreckage of the pylon about thirty feet away. It was still sparking. And then his left hand caught his eye. He could hear his vibranium arm whirring as his fingers convulsed.

"Ya gotov otvechat."

"Bucky!" Sam's sharp voice brought Bucky's head snapping back to look up at him. "You with me?"

"I… think so…?" Bucky said unsteadily.

"Here, can you sit up?" Sam urged.

Bucky took a deep breath and then dug his right elbow into the grass underneath him, leveraging himself up somewhat. Sam wound an arm carefully around Bucky's back in order to help him sit up. Bucky gasped and moaned as his muscles ached with every movement, but now that he was sitting up he could feel his head clearing. He curled his vibranium arm to rest in his lap as he attempted to work his fingers out of their convulsions.

"Sorry, I…" Bucky mumbled, casting an anxious glance back at the ruined pylon.

"The reprogramming HYDRA used on your involved electrocution," Sam supplied gently. "Yeah, I know."

Bucky nodded, looking determinedly down at his hand as his fingers finally started to at least twitch in the direction he tried to move them. "Sometimes… it's hard to believe that programming is really… gone."

Sam reached out and grasped Bucky's shoulder again. "Well, you're not trying to murder me. I call that a good day." Despite himself, Bucky snorted a laugh at Sam's stupid smirk.

Bucky had come a long way. Oftentimes it felt like he had lived four lifetimes. Before HYDRA, HYDRA, post-HYDRA, and now… whatever this was. He was still trying to figure it out. And he was incredibly grateful to not have to figure it out on his own.

"Thanks, Sam."

Translation: Ya gotov otvechat. - Ready to comply.