The trouble began on a typically normal mission for the Hellsing Organization. A FREAK vampire had been reported in the city and Alucard was sent to deal with him.
-In a deserted back alley of London-
Random FREAK vampire: *Is firing wildly at Alucard emptying several clips into him*
Alucard: *Get's shot into a bloody puddle on the pavement*
RFV: What a weakling, there's no way that fool could have been Hellsing's pet vampire
Alucard: *Thinking* He don't know me very well do he
RFV: *Starts to walk away*
Alucard: *Regenerating in a cloud of bats* Releasing power lock to level 3..level 2...level1...the Cromwell approval is now in effect...
RFV: *Turning around* What the...?
-Five minutes later-
Alucard in Hell hound form: *Licking lips* BURP...excuse me, Well that was almost fun. Oh well back to the mansion. *Tries to turn back into his human form*...huh....I can't turn back
-One hour later-
Alucard: *Is still in his dog form and is lying on a doctors table* well Doc give it to me straight
Doc: Alright, so far we know that you can't turn back into your human form
Alucard: Genius! Now tell me WHY
Doc: We'll need more time to determine that
Alucard: Fine! Just hurry!
-Two hours later-
Alucard: *Is reading a book* (Don't ask me HOW a dog holds a book)
Doc: Alright We've figured it out.
Alucard: About time
Doc: Well it appears that in your canine form your body absorbs the DNA of what you eat. Apparently over the years you ate so many low level vampires, vampires without the power to switch between a dog form and back that you absorbed enough of their DNA to loose your own shape changing powers when you had your last...uh snack. Essentially trapping you in your dog form
Alucard: Just wonderful, please tell me there's a cure
Doc: Yes I have a formula that will slowly purge the foreign DNA from your body but it will take time, about two months. Until then you'll just have to learn to live in your current body
Integral: I heard the whole thing Alucard, I'm putting you on temporary retirement until your condition clears up. Ceres will take care of anything that comes up
Doc: ....well actually....
Integral: What is it?
Doc: Since Alucard and Miss Ceres are joined by blood her master's current condition may have some...ah interesting side effects on her
Alucard: Like....?
Integral: What kind of side effects?
-View of outside of the Hellsing mansion-
Ceres: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
-Back in the doctors office-
Doc: I think were about to find...
-Outside of Ceres's room-
Integral: So...who goes in first
Walter: I nominate Alucard, he is her master, all if favor?
Integral: I
Walter: I
Alucard: I.....hate you *Goes into Ceres's room*
Walter: Do you think he'll be alright?
Integral: *Shrugs*
Alucards voice:....Oh Ceres...
Ceres: Master...look at me
Walter: Did you hear? He didn't call her police girl. This must be serious
Integral: Yes I heard now be quiet
Alucard: Ceres...look I'm sorry
Ceres: Why are you sorry?...wait your don't mean...
Alucard: Yes well about that...
Ceres: YOU'RE THE ONE WHO DID THIS TO ME!?
Alucard: No Ceres stay back I can explain
-Random screaming and crashing noises are heard from inside the room-
Integral + Walter: *Thoughts of a monster Ceres eating Alucard*
Alucard: *Get's thrown out of the room, thru the door, and hits a wall*
Integral+ Walter: 0.o
Celes: *Glowing red eyes appear in the doorway*
Integral: Ceres whatever form your in we can cure you just calm down
Ceres: Calm down? CALM DOWN? LOOK AT ME *Steps out of the room*
Walter: Miss Ceres...you're a...poodle....
Ceres: *Is indeed a poodle* Yes Walter I am well aware of that
Walter: *Snickers*
Ceres: Walter I swear if you laugh at me I will hurt you
Walter: *Tries to hold in laughter before* AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *He erupts into uncontrollable hysterical laughter*
Ceres: -_-
Walter: *Continues to laugh pointing at Ceres*
Integral: *Edges away from Walter*
Ceres: *Starts to chase Walter around the hallway*
Walter: AHHHH
Alucard: *Pulls himself out of the wall and goes over to Integral* Aren't you going to stop her
Integral: No
Alucard: Why
Integral: There are some things you just shouldn't get involved in
Alucard: I guess I see your point
Integral: Besides it's not polite to interrupt a dog while it's eating
-Later-
Alucard: So what do dog's usually do to keep entertained, I'm more bored then usual
Integral: Go to the park I guess
Alucard: Oh why not, will you take me
Integral: I suppose
-Five minutes later-
Integral: *Is walking Alucard*
Alucard: Please explain to me why I can't go around causing random havoc
Integral: Because I don't feel like covering up the reports of a mutant seven eyed dog going around eating people and besides you need the exercise.
Alucard: In this form I can battle an army of undead single handedly, do you really think a walk will increase my strength from that level
Integral: Point taken but your still not gonna go around causing havoc
Alucard: Aww
-At the park-
Alucard: So what now?
Integral: *Spots a stick and picks it up* Fetch *Throws the stick*
Alucard: *Chases after it and comes back with the stick in his mouth*
Integral: That's odd
Alucard: Let me guess. You expected me to come back with a telephone pole in my mouth or something
Integral: Well it is something that you'd do
Alucard: I suppose so
Integral: Anyway let's try again *Takes the stick and throws*
Alucard: *Chases after it*
Integral: *Has the stick behind her back* Hehe stupid dog
Alucard: ??? Now where did that stick go to *Searches around for it*
-A few days later-
Alucard: NO WAY
Integral: It's in your contract you have to obey me *Holds up a long piece of paper labeled: ALUCARDS CONTRACT*
Alucard: Let me see that *Takes the contract and puts on reading glasses* There's got to be a loophole in here
Integral: Alucard I don't care if there is a loophole your getting a bath and that's final.
Alucard: NO
Integral: Just get in the tub
Alucard: But I don't wanna!
Integral: Look, Ceres didn't argue *Points to Ceres*
Ceres: *Is sparkling clean and currently gnawing on Walters arm (Don't worry it's still attached)
Walter: Miss Victoria will you please stop now
Ceres: *Gnaw gnaw* No *Gnaw gnaw*
Alucard: That's because you used Walter as bait
Integral: Fine what will it take to get you to take a bath
Alucard: Hmm can I go around causing random chaos....
Integral: No
Alucard: At the Escariot headquarters
Integral: .....Deal! *They shake hands...er paws*
-A few days later-
Integral: *Is at her desk* Alright Walter what's on the schedule for today?
Walter: Well other then the usual silencing of undead, the only thing other thing for today is....oh
Integral: What is it?
Walter: Well it would appear that Alucard and Ceres have been scheduled to be.....fixed today
Integral: *Evil Grin* Well in that case have someone tell them to go to the medical facility immediately
Walter: Err *Fidgets nervously*
Integral: What now?
Walter: Well about a week ago I took the liberty of informing Alucard and Miss Victoria of their...procedure...
Integral: I see....
Walter: When I went to see them this morning they didn't answer and I went inside Alucards room and found this *Hands her a letter* It would appear that they've...left the country
Letter: Master,
I'm cashing in all the sick leave I've built up over the last decade or so, I have enough for the police girl to. We'll come back when the condition clears up.
PS: We will be stopping in Rome to annoy Maxwell and Anderson
PPS: Please Ignore the outbreak of blood bank robberies that you may hear about
Walter: I wonder how they managed to write it....
-In a deserted back alley of London-
Random FREAK vampire: *Is firing wildly at Alucard emptying several clips into him*
Alucard: *Get's shot into a bloody puddle on the pavement*
RFV: What a weakling, there's no way that fool could have been Hellsing's pet vampire
Alucard: *Thinking* He don't know me very well do he
RFV: *Starts to walk away*
Alucard: *Regenerating in a cloud of bats* Releasing power lock to level 3..level 2...level1...the Cromwell approval is now in effect...
RFV: *Turning around* What the...?
-Five minutes later-
Alucard in Hell hound form: *Licking lips* BURP...excuse me, Well that was almost fun. Oh well back to the mansion. *Tries to turn back into his human form*...huh....I can't turn back
-One hour later-
Alucard: *Is still in his dog form and is lying on a doctors table* well Doc give it to me straight
Doc: Alright, so far we know that you can't turn back into your human form
Alucard: Genius! Now tell me WHY
Doc: We'll need more time to determine that
Alucard: Fine! Just hurry!
-Two hours later-
Alucard: *Is reading a book* (Don't ask me HOW a dog holds a book)
Doc: Alright We've figured it out.
Alucard: About time
Doc: Well it appears that in your canine form your body absorbs the DNA of what you eat. Apparently over the years you ate so many low level vampires, vampires without the power to switch between a dog form and back that you absorbed enough of their DNA to loose your own shape changing powers when you had your last...uh snack. Essentially trapping you in your dog form
Alucard: Just wonderful, please tell me there's a cure
Doc: Yes I have a formula that will slowly purge the foreign DNA from your body but it will take time, about two months. Until then you'll just have to learn to live in your current body
Integral: I heard the whole thing Alucard, I'm putting you on temporary retirement until your condition clears up. Ceres will take care of anything that comes up
Doc: ....well actually....
Integral: What is it?
Doc: Since Alucard and Miss Ceres are joined by blood her master's current condition may have some...ah interesting side effects on her
Alucard: Like....?
Integral: What kind of side effects?
-View of outside of the Hellsing mansion-
Ceres: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
-Back in the doctors office-
Doc: I think were about to find...
-Outside of Ceres's room-
Integral: So...who goes in first
Walter: I nominate Alucard, he is her master, all if favor?
Integral: I
Walter: I
Alucard: I.....hate you *Goes into Ceres's room*
Walter: Do you think he'll be alright?
Integral: *Shrugs*
Alucards voice:....Oh Ceres...
Ceres: Master...look at me
Walter: Did you hear? He didn't call her police girl. This must be serious
Integral: Yes I heard now be quiet
Alucard: Ceres...look I'm sorry
Ceres: Why are you sorry?...wait your don't mean...
Alucard: Yes well about that...
Ceres: YOU'RE THE ONE WHO DID THIS TO ME!?
Alucard: No Ceres stay back I can explain
-Random screaming and crashing noises are heard from inside the room-
Integral + Walter: *Thoughts of a monster Ceres eating Alucard*
Alucard: *Get's thrown out of the room, thru the door, and hits a wall*
Integral+ Walter: 0.o
Celes: *Glowing red eyes appear in the doorway*
Integral: Ceres whatever form your in we can cure you just calm down
Ceres: Calm down? CALM DOWN? LOOK AT ME *Steps out of the room*
Walter: Miss Ceres...you're a...poodle....
Ceres: *Is indeed a poodle* Yes Walter I am well aware of that
Walter: *Snickers*
Ceres: Walter I swear if you laugh at me I will hurt you
Walter: *Tries to hold in laughter before* AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *He erupts into uncontrollable hysterical laughter*
Ceres: -_-
Walter: *Continues to laugh pointing at Ceres*
Integral: *Edges away from Walter*
Ceres: *Starts to chase Walter around the hallway*
Walter: AHHHH
Alucard: *Pulls himself out of the wall and goes over to Integral* Aren't you going to stop her
Integral: No
Alucard: Why
Integral: There are some things you just shouldn't get involved in
Alucard: I guess I see your point
Integral: Besides it's not polite to interrupt a dog while it's eating
-Later-
Alucard: So what do dog's usually do to keep entertained, I'm more bored then usual
Integral: Go to the park I guess
Alucard: Oh why not, will you take me
Integral: I suppose
-Five minutes later-
Integral: *Is walking Alucard*
Alucard: Please explain to me why I can't go around causing random havoc
Integral: Because I don't feel like covering up the reports of a mutant seven eyed dog going around eating people and besides you need the exercise.
Alucard: In this form I can battle an army of undead single handedly, do you really think a walk will increase my strength from that level
Integral: Point taken but your still not gonna go around causing havoc
Alucard: Aww
-At the park-
Alucard: So what now?
Integral: *Spots a stick and picks it up* Fetch *Throws the stick*
Alucard: *Chases after it and comes back with the stick in his mouth*
Integral: That's odd
Alucard: Let me guess. You expected me to come back with a telephone pole in my mouth or something
Integral: Well it is something that you'd do
Alucard: I suppose so
Integral: Anyway let's try again *Takes the stick and throws*
Alucard: *Chases after it*
Integral: *Has the stick behind her back* Hehe stupid dog
Alucard: ??? Now where did that stick go to *Searches around for it*
-A few days later-
Alucard: NO WAY
Integral: It's in your contract you have to obey me *Holds up a long piece of paper labeled: ALUCARDS CONTRACT*
Alucard: Let me see that *Takes the contract and puts on reading glasses* There's got to be a loophole in here
Integral: Alucard I don't care if there is a loophole your getting a bath and that's final.
Alucard: NO
Integral: Just get in the tub
Alucard: But I don't wanna!
Integral: Look, Ceres didn't argue *Points to Ceres*
Ceres: *Is sparkling clean and currently gnawing on Walters arm (Don't worry it's still attached)
Walter: Miss Victoria will you please stop now
Ceres: *Gnaw gnaw* No *Gnaw gnaw*
Alucard: That's because you used Walter as bait
Integral: Fine what will it take to get you to take a bath
Alucard: Hmm can I go around causing random chaos....
Integral: No
Alucard: At the Escariot headquarters
Integral: .....Deal! *They shake hands...er paws*
-A few days later-
Integral: *Is at her desk* Alright Walter what's on the schedule for today?
Walter: Well other then the usual silencing of undead, the only thing other thing for today is....oh
Integral: What is it?
Walter: Well it would appear that Alucard and Ceres have been scheduled to be.....fixed today
Integral: *Evil Grin* Well in that case have someone tell them to go to the medical facility immediately
Walter: Err *Fidgets nervously*
Integral: What now?
Walter: Well about a week ago I took the liberty of informing Alucard and Miss Victoria of their...procedure...
Integral: I see....
Walter: When I went to see them this morning they didn't answer and I went inside Alucards room and found this *Hands her a letter* It would appear that they've...left the country
Letter: Master,
I'm cashing in all the sick leave I've built up over the last decade or so, I have enough for the police girl to. We'll come back when the condition clears up.
PS: We will be stopping in Rome to annoy Maxwell and Anderson
PPS: Please Ignore the outbreak of blood bank robberies that you may hear about
Walter: I wonder how they managed to write it....