Title : When Harry Potter became Harry Malfoy
Author : Ptijade
Rating : PG-13 for now but will go up to R or NC-17
Disclaimers: I don't own Harry Potter, I'm just having fun with the characters, no money is
made with it.
Warning: It's an AU story and a SLASH story! M/M LOVE! Don't like it, don't read it!!
Feedback: Greatly appreciated!
Archives: Just tell me where you put it
AN: Severus is only 10 years older than Harry and Hogwarts is not a boarding school.
/…/: thoughts
"…": talking
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Chapter 1: How it was before
Harry was a very happy teenager.
He lived in a small house in a big town near London. He had parents who loved him and that he loved very much and lots of friends ready to follow him everywhere. He was an only child and regretted it a little, but his friends compensated his want for a brother or sister.
He lived an ordinary life, well, as far as "ordinary" could go when you are a wizard.
Sometimes, his father had to go away for his work, but he always came back quickly saying that he missed his family too much. He was a very loving father and husband.
Harry thought he needed nothing else to make his life better, except for finding the Great Love of his life. And he had already found it even if he had not declared himself yet.
His potential soulmate?
His private teacher, Severus Snape.
The man had arrived when Harry was thirteen.
At first, he had seen him as a big brother, even if a cold one at the beginning. He only helped Harry with his lessons and never talked about his life or anything else; but Harry was nothing if not persistent, so he continued to talk to Snape until he made him answer and then smile.
From then on, they liked to chat after his tutoring in potions and DADA. One day, as they were talking about the complexity of love, Severus saying that Harry was too young to understand fully what real love was, Harry realized that he felt something very peculiar towards his friend.
He thought about it later that night.
He knew that men could love other men; his mother had explained it to him, one day while they were shopping in town and after seeing two men kissing in the middle of the street. The wizarding world was very open to homosexuality even if there were still people who were against it.
So, lying on his bed, he tried to analyse his feelings.
/What do I really feel for Severus? Is it only friendship? When I see him I feel my heart make a little jump in my chest. I have the impression that the day becomes brighter. I'm really happy to see him. But maybe it's just because I consider him the big brother I never had…Aaaahh…. I don't know, I'll think about it later/
But one day, as he was coming back home from Hogwarts when he was 15, he spotted Severus talking with another man and they seemed… very close. In fact, the other man seemed to be…FLIRTING? With Severus?!
Harry felt his heart tighten painfully.
/What's wrong with me?/ he wondered. /To see him with this man… It hurts…Why? I don't want him to smile at other people, to be kind to others… I'm such a selfish brat! But it hurts so much… Is this love?/
During the lesson with Severus, he remained quiet, only answering when he was asked a question.
At the end Severus asked, "Is something wrong? You are not acting like yourself today, Harry."
Harry just gave him a little smile and said, "Don't worry, I'm fine. I've just got a bit of a headache."
"Do you want a potion?"
"No, no, I just need to lie down for a bit."
"Okay, I'll tell your mother that you're resting."
"Thanks." And with that Severus left his room.
Five minutes later, Harry heard a knocking on his door and his mother appeared.
"Are you alright my sweet?" she asked worriedly
"Yeah, mum, I'm fine, just a headache."
"Are you sure?"
"I'm sure."
"Okay then, sleep a little now, and I'll wake you up for dinner."
She was about to exit the room when Harry abruptly asked, "What do you feel when you're in love?" and then blushed.
His mother slowly turned around. She looked at him and then smiled. "Why do you ask such a question? Is that what's giving you a 'headache'?"
"Well… yeah." Harry replied sheepishly.
"Oh my sweetie! You are so cute!" she exclaimed. "Are you in love?"
"Well, that's what I would like to know!"
"What exactly do you feel for your 'special' person?"
"At the beginning, I thought it was just friendship, but recently I've noticed that every time I see him, my heart begins to beat a little faster and I have the impressionthat everything is all right. And today, I saw him talking with someone who was flirting and then… my heart started to ache. As if something was squeezing it."
"So, it's a 'he'? And the feelings you're describing…. My little baby is in love!"
"Really?"
"Yes my sweet, there is no mistake!! Wait 'til I tell your father about it!!"
"NO!" Harry shouted
"Why not?"
"It's- it's embarrassing!! And you know that dad will make a huge fuss about it!"
"Of course I know! That's why I want to tell him!"
"You… you evil mummy!"
"Thank you very much" she replied, laughing. "All right, if it makes you so uncomfortable, I'll wait until you tell him yourself. Now that your little problem is solved, you can help me make dinner!" With that, they both headed towards the kitchen.
Harry did not declared his love and did not tell his father. He just let his love grow deeper and deeper every day. His mother was the only one to whom he confessed his feelings.
He had not told his father because as he had pointed out to his mother, Harry knew that his father would make a fuss about it.
In fact, not just a fuss, he would hunt down poor Severus, threatening him for hurting his dear Harry, when Harry had not declared his feelings yet!
That was because his father was very protective; very, very protective.
Okay, he was overly protective.
If Lily had not been there, Harry would have become a rotten spoilt brat. His father always wanted to give him everything, the newest toys, books about Quidditch or DADA (Harry was very fond of it), the newest broom, all the animals he could buy, and so on. But Lily had always been there to stop him; she knew what was essential from what was a present and what was just completely useless.
So, all in all, he lived a perfect life, until The Day. The day his mother died and he discovered that all his life had been a lie.