Chapter 13~ The tomato juice incident
"When we get back we are going to take a long holiday."
"Yes, we are."
The twins leaned back in their seats on the plane, mentally cursing the woman who had given them the tickets.
"I suppose this is like luxury to her." sighed One
Unfortunately in their hurry to find Estelle they hadn't bothered to check the plane tickets.
"Economy!" snarled Two as he attempted to mutilate his ticket. To an onlooker it may have simply looked as though he was trying to attempt some difficult origami.
"At the rate you're going that thing will have reduced itself to dust soon" grinned One as he gazed at Two's hands still trying to murder the ticket.
"It's not my fault that I'm used to champagne, salmon and a good movie when I'm travelling. Who books our tickets normally? The Merovingian. So therefore it's his fault, not mine if this ticket reduces itself to dust." Two continued to fiddle with the scrap of card between his fingers. "I mean what is this supposed to be?"
Two held up a plastic cup of something that looked like it would have been perfectly at home in a sewage pipe.
"That is tomato juice" said One "It's very good for you."
Two glanced warily at the contents of the cup and cautiously took a small sip. The colour he turned was reminiscent of the kind an artist would be proud to paint grass with.
"I don't even want to know the use-by date" Two managed to splutter out.
"Well, it's usually good for you." One's mouth twitched slightly as he watched his twin pour the remnants of his cup into a sick bag.
"I can't believe you're taking this so calmly." Two gazed up at his twin in amazement.
"It's called 'putting on a front' besides we don't want this one screwed up, do we?" One raised an eyebrow at his brother who quickly went back to mutilating his ticket.
Lunch turned out to be even less appetising than the tomato juice. The only thing left that the woman had left on the trolley was mushroom soup or ham cobs. After the tomato juice episode Two decided that he wasn't hungry. One, however, chose to brave a ham cob.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Okay, so we forget the holiday when we get back. Instead, we'll send the Merovingian on a round-the-world trip in economy! It'll do him good to see how the other half live.."
The twins strode through the Parisian airport attracting stranger looks than usually from passers by.
"Oh the poor dear" whispered an elderly lady to her husband
"That guy looks green!"
"I'm sure, as programs, we're not supposed to get food poisoning." One moaned
"No we're not."
One sighed "Then whatever was in that cob must have been really, really old!"
"I seriously doubt you will get food poisoning."
"How do you know? You've never had it."
"Neither have you so please stop whinging about your stomach and let's find the girl."
"You don't even care your poor brother is dying!" One pouted and sat down heavily on a metal bench.
"For goodness sake. You aren't going to die. Now get your backside off that seat before we both are in danger of something much worse than death."
One groaned clutching his stomach "Like what?"
Two pointed out of the window at a taxi that had just pulled in.
"Like that."
Through the pouring rain outside, the twins could just see a young woman stepping into the car. She was wearing a white t-shirt and jacket with jeans and her chestnut hair was tied in a tight ponytail.
"It's her!" One yelled.
The twins ran through the airport, crashing into people as they passed. They reached the automatic doors which opened just a second too late. The car was gone.
Two looked up and down the road then said something telepathically to One. One nodded and stood on the edge of the pavement. A few seconds later another car came into view. As soon as it was a few feet from where One was standing, he stepped out into the road in front of the oncoming car.
The driver's eyes widened and he swerved out of the way. One, however, phased into the passenger seat.
"Bonjour!" he smirked
The driver took one look at One and slumped forward onto the steering wheel in a dead faint. One opened the driver's door, shoved the man out into the road, moved across to the driver's seat and took control of the steering wheel. Seconds later, Two appeared in the passenger seat.
He looked at One driving and pouted.
"It's not fair! We are in a foreign country, using left-hand drive and you still manage to beat me to the steering wheel!"
"When we get back we are going to take a long holiday."
"Yes, we are."
The twins leaned back in their seats on the plane, mentally cursing the woman who had given them the tickets.
"I suppose this is like luxury to her." sighed One
Unfortunately in their hurry to find Estelle they hadn't bothered to check the plane tickets.
"Economy!" snarled Two as he attempted to mutilate his ticket. To an onlooker it may have simply looked as though he was trying to attempt some difficult origami.
"At the rate you're going that thing will have reduced itself to dust soon" grinned One as he gazed at Two's hands still trying to murder the ticket.
"It's not my fault that I'm used to champagne, salmon and a good movie when I'm travelling. Who books our tickets normally? The Merovingian. So therefore it's his fault, not mine if this ticket reduces itself to dust." Two continued to fiddle with the scrap of card between his fingers. "I mean what is this supposed to be?"
Two held up a plastic cup of something that looked like it would have been perfectly at home in a sewage pipe.
"That is tomato juice" said One "It's very good for you."
Two glanced warily at the contents of the cup and cautiously took a small sip. The colour he turned was reminiscent of the kind an artist would be proud to paint grass with.
"I don't even want to know the use-by date" Two managed to splutter out.
"Well, it's usually good for you." One's mouth twitched slightly as he watched his twin pour the remnants of his cup into a sick bag.
"I can't believe you're taking this so calmly." Two gazed up at his twin in amazement.
"It's called 'putting on a front' besides we don't want this one screwed up, do we?" One raised an eyebrow at his brother who quickly went back to mutilating his ticket.
Lunch turned out to be even less appetising than the tomato juice. The only thing left that the woman had left on the trolley was mushroom soup or ham cobs. After the tomato juice episode Two decided that he wasn't hungry. One, however, chose to brave a ham cob.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Okay, so we forget the holiday when we get back. Instead, we'll send the Merovingian on a round-the-world trip in economy! It'll do him good to see how the other half live.."
The twins strode through the Parisian airport attracting stranger looks than usually from passers by.
"Oh the poor dear" whispered an elderly lady to her husband
"That guy looks green!"
"I'm sure, as programs, we're not supposed to get food poisoning." One moaned
"No we're not."
One sighed "Then whatever was in that cob must have been really, really old!"
"I seriously doubt you will get food poisoning."
"How do you know? You've never had it."
"Neither have you so please stop whinging about your stomach and let's find the girl."
"You don't even care your poor brother is dying!" One pouted and sat down heavily on a metal bench.
"For goodness sake. You aren't going to die. Now get your backside off that seat before we both are in danger of something much worse than death."
One groaned clutching his stomach "Like what?"
Two pointed out of the window at a taxi that had just pulled in.
"Like that."
Through the pouring rain outside, the twins could just see a young woman stepping into the car. She was wearing a white t-shirt and jacket with jeans and her chestnut hair was tied in a tight ponytail.
"It's her!" One yelled.
The twins ran through the airport, crashing into people as they passed. They reached the automatic doors which opened just a second too late. The car was gone.
Two looked up and down the road then said something telepathically to One. One nodded and stood on the edge of the pavement. A few seconds later another car came into view. As soon as it was a few feet from where One was standing, he stepped out into the road in front of the oncoming car.
The driver's eyes widened and he swerved out of the way. One, however, phased into the passenger seat.
"Bonjour!" he smirked
The driver took one look at One and slumped forward onto the steering wheel in a dead faint. One opened the driver's door, shoved the man out into the road, moved across to the driver's seat and took control of the steering wheel. Seconds later, Two appeared in the passenger seat.
He looked at One driving and pouted.
"It's not fair! We are in a foreign country, using left-hand drive and you still manage to beat me to the steering wheel!"