To japanesejewel: Rockx, eh? Never head that one. Note to self: steal that word. Oh, wait, you weren't supposed to hear that…I mean,…uh…I…YES I'M AWESOME!!!
To Parareru (man, that's hard to pronounce): What can I say? Señor Senior, Sr.'s been watching the Drakken series, and picked up some personality traits from our favorite mad scientist.
I could tell you what I don't own (yet), but you already know.
CHAPTER FOUR
Duff Killigan gave another evil laugh for good measure, then held his golf club about an inch from Rufus, ready to give him a solid whack if Kim or Ron came any closer. If I'm lucky, he thought, I just might hit Kim Possible between the eyes with this drive.
Just then, from somewhere in the bank, an electronic beeping began to play "Phantom of the Opera".
"Oh. Excuse me." Duff Killigan, much to Kim and Ron's surprise, set down his golf bag, unzipped one of the side pouches, and took out his cell phone. "Hello?...Aye…aye…nay, nay, nothing has…what? Now? But…But I just got to the best part! Ye see, I have the hairless rodent trapped in one of me special…oh…okay…all right. Bye."
Killigan replaced the cell phone, and then turned to Kim and Ron. "Well, I hate to be leavin' ye on such short notice, but…" He tossed a golf ball on the ground. A huge cloud of smoke filled the bank. When it had cleared, the only clue as to where Killigan had gone was the sound of a helicopter taking off from the roof.
As Ron helped a terrified Rufus out of his golf ball prison, Kim questioned the tellers and patrons. Remarkably, except for one man's least expensive watch, Killigan hadn't stolen anything!
"Well," Ron said, on the way back to school, "I think that one would qualify as our easiest mission ever."
"I don't know, Ron. Why would he just leave like that?"
The Kimmunicator chirped again. "Kim! We got a hit on the site from Steve Verruckt! The club's been robbed!"
"Robbed of what?"
"Gone!" Steve pointed to the file cabinet in the back of the room. It was open and, except for a single folder in the very back of the drawer, completely empty. "Someone broke in and took every single evil plot we had!"
"Except for this one," Allen said, taking out the remaining folder.
Kim suddenly caught a whiff of a familiar expensive, custom-blend cologne. "Give you three guesses who. I knew Junior was up to something! Come on, Ron. We have to find him!"
"Why?"
"Ron, think about it. Señor Senior, Sr. and Señor Senior, Jr. have an entire drawer full of world domination plots that have been meticulously analyzed to make sure nothing can go wrong!"
Unfortunately, on her way out, Kim ran into Barkin. Literally.
"Where's the fire, Possible?"
"Mr. Barkin! Where's Señor Senior, Jr.?"
"He left, with no explanation. Said that some important family matter had come up. I think I heard a helicopter. The real question is why you haven't reported back to me."
"Well, you see…"
"Possible, let me make one thing clear: nobody breaks their promises to Steve Barkin. I think you know exactly what's going on, and you're not telling me. Which leads me to wonder, what are you hiding? What could possibly be so mind-bogglingly important for me not to find out about?"
"Kim Possible! Are you still following me?"
Steve Verruckt came out of the meeting room, with Allen, Don, and Bob close behind.
"Wha-?" Kim began, but saw Steve give her a barely noticeable wink.
"Verruckt. What's going on here?"
"Kim Possible has been following me for the past few days, and I think she's trying to pry into my private life!" As he passed Kim, he whispered "I'll deal with Barkin. You go do what you need to do."
Within ten minutes, Kim was in the air, in the private jet of a skinny, yet strong-looking man.
"Thanks for the ride, Mr. Pengine!"
"Kim, after you took care of those poachers in my nature reserve, I'm more than happy to help!"
"No big. It was just a matter of making sure the elephants say them first."
Ron came up to the front of the plane. "Uh, Kim? Didn't we shut down Señor Senior, Sr.'s lair?"
"Yeah."
"So, then, where are we going?"
Kim opened her mouth to speak, and then realized that she had no idea where to go…until a sudden idea came to her.
"Wait a minute. First, Junior is on the phone to his father about doing something that requires training and skintight outfits." Ron shuddered. "What's wrong?"
"I just got an image of Señor Senior, Sr. in a skintight outfit, and let me tell you, that is SICK AND WRONG!"
"Ron! Focus! Okay, so then, Duff Killigan holds up a bank, in Middleton, but leaves in a helicopter without stealing anything after receiving a mysterious phone call, which totally doesn't fit his M.O. Then, while we're gone, Señor Senior, Jr. makes his move, steals all of EGBT's evil plots, and gets away while we're gone. Plus, Barkin said he heard a helicopter!"
"So?"
"So, I think that the whole Killigan-robbing-a-bank thing was just a way to divert our attention. Killigan was the distraction."
"You mean Duff Killigan took my job? I take back my earlier statement; that is sick and wrong!"
"Sick and wrong." Rufus agreed from Ron's pocket.
"Wade, is there any reason why Duff Killigan wouldn't be operating out of his island lair?"
"None that I know of. But what does this have to do with the robbery of the plots?"
"Can you stream me a satellite image of the island's exact coordinates?"
Wade pushed a button, and the screen changed to an image of a largish island that was about 5% beach, 5% house, and 90% golf course. As Kim watched, a helicopter landed on the roof, and two figures got out of it.
"Yep. The Seniors couldn't use their old lair, so they borrowed Killigan's."
One hour later, Kim and Ron swam up onto the shores of Killigan's Island.
"KP, could you answer me something?"
"What's that?"
"How is it that you can always go straight from skydiving to scuba diving and come out looking as though you just went to a beauty salon, whereas I always flop around like a wounded animal for a while?"
"The secret is to detach your parachute before you hit the water."
"Yeah. How come I can never do that and you can?"
"I think it's because I don't duct tape the parachute to my body."
"Oh sure, fine, if you want to take chances on your pack coming off in midair, be my…"
Ron was cut short by the arrival of Señor Senior, Sr., Señor Senior, Jr., and Duff Killigan on the beach. All three had evil grins on their faces.
"You see, father? I told you they would find us. They always find us!"
So? Eh? Whaddya think? Review! Respond! Conform! Consume! OBEY!!! Oh, wait, that's not right, uh…