The year is 1994, Spike and Carly have been dating each other for 9 years,
but tonight's date was to be a special occasion.
Bumblebee headed towards a cliff-edge overlooking the sea, and a full moon, with Spike and Carly sitting inside. Carly looked at Spike in the eyes.
"What are we here for Spike?"
"You'll see!"
Fireworks suddenly lit up the clear, sky, in fabulous explosions that Carly had never seen before, her eyes widened with emotion as she put her arms around Spike.
After the final firework turned the sky red, then came the moment of truth for Spike.
"We've been seeing each other for 9 years, 9 years of wonderful nights, 9 years of emotion. Carly, will you join me in marriage?" he said nervously. Carly looked shocked for a moment,
"Yes, I will!" she hugged Spike, knocking him onto the seat, as the two began to kiss.
"Looks like I've got a wedding to arrange..." said Bumblebee to himself. Unaware to them, Laserbeak had been listening to every word that had been said, he hastily returned to the Decepticon headquarters, and perched on Soundwave's arm.
"Laserbeak, report." Laserbeak entered Soundwave's chest and played back everything he heard, whilst Megatron looked on, unimpressed, he instantly turned towards Starscream and threw an Energon Cube at him.
"You asshole Starscream!! You thought Bumblebee was hear to attack us, and instead, it's just so the flesh creatures could have a romantic evening!"
"How was I supposed to know that?? Even you wouldn't know! No wonder we haven't defeated those Auto-b*****s!"
"Any more of your foul language and I'll blast you into tiny pieces and jump on them!" Starscream walked away grumpily.
The next morning at the Ark, Bumblebee was up early, sat on a rock, watching the sunrise, thinking where and how to arrange Spike and Carly's wedding.
"I gotta find out how and where to do this wedding, but who can I tell?"
"Hey Bumblebee! You're up early!" shouted Jazz, as he walked over.
"Oh, err... hi Jazz!"
"What's up man? You sound nervous!"
"You know a lot about humans and such don't you?"
"I ain't kiddin'! Whaddya wanna know?"
"How would you react if I said... Spike and Carly were getting married?"
"Spike is getting married to that babe?! Come with me Bumblebee, it's gonna be a big day for you as well!" Jazz and Bumblebee walked back towards the Ark.
"Me? How come?"
"Cos there's no doubt Spike will choose you to be the best man!"
"Best man? What does he do?"
"Watch and find out! Yo, Teletraan! Show us how a wedding works!" Teletraan- 1 displayed a wedding procedure.
"Now the best man, is the man who's responsible for keeping the wedding rings until the big day!" Prime walked into the control room, puzzled on why Bumblebee and Jazz were watching a wedding clip.
"What are you doing watching a wedding?"
"Spike and Carly are getting married!" said Bumblebee.
"Hmm... we should wait until the other Autobots are awakened..."
Eventually, all the other Autobots were in the control room around Teletraan-1, then Bumblebee decided to deliver the big news.
"Hey guys!"
"Hey whut? Is there any Decepti-creeps coming? I feel in the mood for some trashin' today!" said Ironhide.
"Not quite Ironhide... Spike and Carly are going to get married!" The other Autobots looked puzzled at each other.
"As the best man, it's my job to arrange the wedding. Any suggestions as to how and where we're gonna do it?"
"Why don't we do it here? I could neaten up the place with some Holograms, and be the grooms-man!" said Hound, demonstrating what holograms he could use.
"Why don't we wear those Dinner-jackets those humans wear? It'll go especially well with my paint-job!" said Sunstreaker.
"An' I could be the DJ for the after Ceremony party! I'll get you all down on the dance floor!" said Blaster.
"Now who's gonna preside over the ceremony?" asked Prime.
"Call me 'Reverend Jazz' and I'll make them man and wife." Jazz stepped forward.
"As I believe the humans say, 'Amen Reverend'! And I know exactly who I am going to invite to this wedding. Let's get to work."
Later on, Spike and Carly took a ride in Bumblebee, mainly to discuss arrangements for the wedding.
"When are ya gonna hold the wedding Spike?" asked Bumblebee.
"I don't know Bumblebee." Carly then laid her head on Spike's shoulder and wrapped her arms around him. "How about... this Friday?"
Wheeljack was in his lab making the wedding cake. But also at the he had to keep the Dinobots at bay from toying with his inventions and the wedding cake mixture, especially Grimlock.
"Me Grimlock! Love Wheeljack's inventions!"
"Get away Grimlock! This is no invention!" Slag and Snarl were busy staring at one of Wheeljack's inventions that he was working on.
"Tell Slag what this weird thing is!" said Slag. Wheeljack walked over, and put it away in a storage unit.
"Let's just say... it's gonna be a perfect cure for what the humans call 'hangovers'."
"Hangover?! What's a hangover? Tell Grimlock what a hangover is!"
"You'll find out soon enough!" Wheeljack went back to making the wedding cake. Hound was making holograms of decorations for the wedding.
"Tell me Mirage, which Hologram do you think is better, these flowers, or this heart?"
"Hmm... the flowers!"
"Has anyone checked how many Energon Cubes we have? I mean, we're gonna be drinking a lot on Friday night!" said Bluestreak. "Maybe we should pay the Decepticons a visit..." said Hound.
"Then let's do it!" said Mirage.
In the Decepticon base, Starscream had been left behind to guard the base whilst the others had gone to take a shipment of Energon cubes to Cybertron.
"Starscream, stay behind! You can't be trusted! You couldn't lead androids to a picnic! I'LL SHOW MEGATRON!"
Suddenly a Hologram of Megatron appeared right behind Starscream, and Starscream thought it really was Megatron. Horrified of what he thought would happen; Starscream dropped to his knees and started begging.
"OH! Forgive me Megatron! I'm not worthy! I'M NOT WORTHY!!! FORGIVE ME ALMIGHTY LEADER! I THINK YOU'RE THE BEST!"
Mirage - being invisible – managed to steal some Energon Cubes and met Hound back outside the room Starscream was in, whilst he was still begging.
"I got 'em Hound! Let's go!"
Hound disengaged the Hologram of Megatron and made a run for it.
"AUTOBOTS!!!! IT WAS JUST A HOLOGRAM!!! YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS!!"
But just then, the rest of the Decepticons returned, much to the horror of Starscream.
"Starscream, what in the world are you doing?" asked Megatron.
"Eh... err... I was just exaggerating what would happen if..."
"Megatron, a stack of our Energon Cubes has been stolen." Said Soundwave. Megatron began to walk towards Starscream.
"Starscream... you are an incompetent idiot!!!" Megatron pointed his Fusion Cannon at Starscream.
Back at the Ark, Hound and Mirage were gloating over how they managed to steal Energon Cubes from the Decepticons.
"Heh-heh! Latest Import! Energon Cube Export! So good, the Decepticons hate to see it being stolen!" said Mirage.
"We've got enough Energon Cubes here to paint the town red!" said Hound.
Prime then returned with Brawn. Brawn opened the back of Prime's trailer and removed a giant roll of black material.
"What'cha gonna do with that roll of material Prime?" asked Ironhide.
"We're going to make ourselves some dinner-suits."
"Ratchet cut out a jacket and bow tie from the material, and Prime tried the tie and jacket on."
"How do I look?"
"It suits you Prime!" remarked Ratchet.
Soon, the other Autobots were trying on their dinner jackets.
"I love it! It matches my new paint job perfectly!" said Sunstreaker.
"I'd say it is a Masterpiece!" said Grapple.
Just then, Tracks rolled in and transformed.
"I've been out to get something... THIS HAT!" Tracks pulled out a very girlish-hat, which caused everyone else to burst out laughing. "Oh dear, I still think it is so gorgeous, it's very stylish and it is SO me!" he said, standing in a girlish pose, unaware of his homosexual behaviour.
That night, Spike, Chip, Bumblebee and Hound held a secret bachelor's party by visiting a Strip Club.
"Make the most of this night Spike, for it'll be you last night as a single guy!" said Chip.
"I will Chip, don't you worry!" They gathered around a small stage, and a sexy looking Peruvian girl came out. Unknown to her and Spike, they once knew each other. The Peruvian girl unbuttoned her dress much to the pleasure of everyone.
"Alright! Take it off babe!" shouted Bumblebee. But then, the girl recognized Spike.
"Spike? Is that you?"
"Juanita?"
"Oh Spike!" Juanita stepped off the stage and hugged Spike. Oh I haven't seen you for a long time...we need to see each other more often.
"Uh, yeah, but I'm getting married tomorrow..." Juanita looked shocked after what Spike told her.
"You're still single tonight, come with me sexy-boy!" Juanita walked off with Spike into her dressing room.
"Damn she's gone! Now what are we gonna do?" said Bumblebee.
"I've got an ace up my sleeve!" Hound produced a hologram of Autobot femme fatale Arcee, which Hound was able to make dance for them. Meanwhile in Juanita's dressing room, her and Spike were making up for the time they spent apart.
"You know Spike... I've been waiting to do this for many years." Juanita unbuttoned her dress, and removed it slowly, and sexily revealing her underwear, and a very sexy figure.
"Woah! You should be Miss Peru!" said Spike.
"I am... now get that shirt off you sexy beast!" Juanita unbuttoned Spike's shirt as they began to make out and kiss... but this was the last time Spike would kiss another woman, for the big day was tomorrow.
Friday came along; it was to be a big day not only for Spike and Carly, but also for the Autobots. At dawn, Prime stepped outside the Ark to watch the sunrise. Red sky, no clouds, all set for a perfect day. He could see a white coloured car carrier heading towards the Ark. Prime looked on as though he knew what it was. The car carrier came to a stop, and transformed into what was Optimus Prime's oldest friend, Ultra Magnus.
"Ultra Magnus!"
"Prime!"
"It's good to see you again old friend!" The two shook hands.
"Same to you! My journey from Autobot City took longer than expected! It's not easy finding the Ark, especially when there's miles and miles of desert around me! Anyway, I bet this is gonna be some Wedding! I've never met Spike or Carly." Prime and Magnus walked back inside the Ark.
The Aerialbots were busy preparing their post-ceremony flying display.
"Okay guys! We've got to get the final part of our show right!" said Silverbolt.
"Nah, we're getting it right! You keep screwing up Mr. Scared-of-heights!"
"Slingshot! How many times have I told you not to call me that?"
"Yeah, well I'm the fastest, smartest, hottest jet you ever saw!" Slingshot began to brag.
"Don't forget why we're doing this, it's for the humans getting married!" said Fireflight.
"Huh! Stupid humans! What did they ever do for US? Well that Carly woman is so hot, I wish she was..."
"Why don't ya try out my fireworks guys?" Wheeljack approached the Aerialbots with a load of dangerously unreliable looking fireworks.
"No way! I remember what happened when we last used YOUR fireworks!" said Silverbolt, remembering that Wheeljack's fireworks were so dangerous; they flew out of control and started attacking the Autobots themselves!
"I guess I'll just keep them for next time the Decepticons decide to attack us!" On his way back to the Ark, Wheeljack planted some small cameras inside the Gazebo where the post-ceremony party would be held. "When the other Autobots awaken with a bad hangover, I'm gonna give them a cure that not even Ratchet would be able to find!"
Blaster was busy setting up the dance-floor and DJ equipment for the party after the ceremony and getting his records together.
"Man, this is gonna be ONE Party!"
"I hope you put on some good music on! Cos I'm gonna be the Dancing-King!" said Jazz, wearing a white robe and a gold chain.
"DJ Blaster never plays a lame song! I should be workin' on Ibiza!"
"Oh yeah! Sun, sand, sea, babes and partying! My idea of a holiday island!"
As the Wedding came closer, the Autobots started to get ready for the big occasion. The Autobots were being waxed up by Ratchet.
"Come on Ratchet! I'm not nearly shiny enough!" moaned Sunstreaker.
"No way! You've had more than your fair share of wax! If I put any more on, I won't be able to wax everyone! And besides, if you were any more shinier, you'd blind my optic sensors!"
Wheeljack finished baking the Wedding cake. And presented it to the other Autobots.
"Fellow Autobots, BEHOLD! La piece de resistance!"
"Me Grimlock! Want piece of wedding cake!" Grimlock ran up and tried to steal a bit of the cake but Wheeljack had put a force field around the cake stopping any one from eating it, thus causing Grimlock to bounce off it! "Me Grimlock! Not fond of Wheeljack's inventions!"
"I though you said you loved my inventions."
"Hmmm... me never thought of that!"
Spike stepped out of his dressing room in his wedding suit to see Bumblebee, Sparkplug and Chip Chase.
"Well how do I look?"
"You look great Spike! I can't believe your big day has finally come! I'm glad I chose not to have a boring old meeting with Bill Gates! What a nerd!" said Chip.
"You made the right decision Chip! Have you still got those rings Bumblebee?"
"Right here Spike! And err... how do I look?"
"Just like any human would! Just why I chose you to be the 'Best Man'." "I'm so proud of you son! I knew the day would come when you and Carly would marry..."
"Thanks, Dad!" Spike and Sparkplug hugged each other.
Ironhide was at Carly's house to pick her up for the wedding. Carly had finished getting into her Wedding Dress, and stepped out of her house to show Ironhide, who had volunteered to escort Carly. Her wedding dress was beautifully made, bright white, elegant and would make the Autobots wish they were human.
"How do I look Ironhide?"
"You look as beautiful as Chromia did the day I met her..."
"YOU have a girlfriend?"
"Yep, back on Cybertron, I met Chromia like er... a long time ago. I remember she wus hanging around with Kup! He was such a seducer back then!"
"Kup eh?" said Ultra Magnus who had stopped by whilst in town. "I remember him telling me how you robbed him of Chromia! He's looking forward to the day he sees you again! So he can get even! HA HA HA!"
"Hey! What'cha doin' here Magnus? Shouldn't ya be back at headquarters?"
"Oh I was in town to get some champagne for the humans and I happened to stop by to see how this old timer was getting on."
"Old timer? That's something you'll never be if you don't get back to the Ark!"
"Alright, alright! See you at the ceremony!" Magnus transformed and headed back to the Ark.
"Well thanks for volunteering to escort me Ironhide, I never had any parents, or at least we don't know what happened to them..."
"Hey, come on... let's get there. I'm gonna have to get cleaned up again as well, Ratchet's gonna have a field day cleanin' mah parts when I keep telling him to get off 'em!" Ironhide transformed and Carly got inside.
The Autobots gathered around Teletraan-1 for the big ceremony looking smart in their dinner jackets and bow ties, and also after being waxed up by Ratchet. Hound decorated the place with Holograms.
"The atmosphere of excitement and intensity would suggest that it's going to be a good wedding." Said Perceptor.
"No it won't, Bumblebee will lose the rings, Jazz won't know what to do and the Aerialbot's flying show will fail." Moaned Huffer.
"Ahh shut up Mr. Moan-mouth, you just moan and complain all the time!" said Gears.
"Says you!" said Huffer.
Ironhide arrived, Carly got out, and Ironhide was then unexpectedly squirted by Inferno and Hot Spot's hoses.
"LEAKIN' LUBRICANTS!"
"Ratchet had us wait till you got back so we could clean you up, can't have you looking all dusty! It might get on Carly's beautiful dress! Damn she looks hot! Shall I put out the fire?" said Inferno.
"Well ah hope Firestar didn't hear that, now get back inside, I've got to escort this young lady!"
"Well... this is it..." said Carly nervously.
"Ah don't worry, it'll be over in Astro-seconds!" said Ironhide.
The moment everyone had been waiting for came. Carly and Ironhide entered, Blaster transformed and began to play 'Here comes the Bride'. The Autobots turned around to see Carly and Ironhide proceed towards the pulpit. Where Spike and Bumblebee were stood waiting nervously.
"Dinobots, draw your swords!" said Grimlock. The Dinobots drew their swords and held them above Ironhide and Carly, forming an arch shape as they walked through. The ceremony began.
"Dear y'all! We're gathered inside the Ark in front of noble Teletraan-1, to witness a wedlock between Spike and Carly! Spike, do you take this beautiful gal Carly, to be your wedded wife?"
"...I do."
"Carly, do you take this handsome young man Spike, to be your wedded husband?"
"I do."
Bumblebee handed Spike and Carly the wedding rings.
"Now recite after me Spike! I, Spike, take you, Carly, to be my wedded wife. With deepest joy I receive you into my life that together we may be one. I promise you my deepest love, my fullest devotion, my tender care. I pledge to you my life as a loving and faithful husband."
Spike held Carly's hand and slowly, put the wedding ring on her 4th finger as he nervously began to recite the words Jazz said.
"I, Spike, take you, Carly, to be my wedded wife. With deepest joy I receive you into my life that together we may be one. I promise you my deepest love, my fullest devotion, my tender care. I pledge to you my life as a loving and faithful husband."
"Carly, recite after me! I, Carly, take you, Spike, to be my wedded husband. With deepest joy I come into my new life with you. Through the pressures of the present and the uncertainties of the future I promise to be faithful to you. I will love, serve, and obey you as long as we both are alive. I pledge to you my life as a loving and faithful wife."
Carly held Spikes hand, and slowly put the wedding ring on as they both looked at each other in the eyes, knowing how deep their own love for each other was.
"I, Carly, take you, Spike, to be my wedded husband. With deepest joy I come into my new life with you. Through the pressures of the present and the uncertainties of the future I promise to be faithful to you. I will love, serve, and obey you as long as we both are alive. I pledge to you my life as a loving and faithful wife..."
"With the power invested in me by my Central Processor, I pronounce you Man, and wife! You may kiss the bride!"
Spike and Carly kissed, all the Autobots cheered.
"You know Prime, it's a time like this that brings a tear to my optics." said Ultra Magnus, overcome with emotion.
"Too true Magnus, it's a beautiful occasion."
At the back, Powerglide had burst into tears.
"This is so beautiful! I wish I had decided to marry Astoria!"
"Err... ain't you got your own babe on Cybertron?" said Beachcomber, trying to comfort Powerglide.
"Ahhh, screw Moonracer, she's a bitch!"
"Autobots! Gather outside for the Aerialbots Stunt show!" said Prime.
Everyone gathered outside the Ark to see the Aerialbots already in the sky, waiting to start their stunt show.
"Okay Aerialbots! Let's do it!" said Silverbolt. The show started off with typical barrel rolls, proceeding to loops followed by dive-bombs and synchronised manoeuvres. Powerglide looked on with jealousy.
"Huh! Why couldn't I be part of the show? I'm better than all 5 Aerialbots put together!"
Then came dangerous acrobatic manoeuvres and close quarters flying. Then to top it off, a high dive flowing into the perfect landing which Silverbolt was dreading.
"I gotta do it! This is a big occasion! I don't want to be slagged off by that idiot Slingshot! Gotta... do... it!!!" Silverbolt had gone so high he was barely visible from the ground and then dived at high speed along with the other Aerialbots and managed to land safely and they all transformed the moment they came to a halt. The others cheered.
"I... I'll never go through THAT again!" gasped Silverbolt
"Roll up! Roll up for the Autobot drinking competition! Are you tough enough to stay sober? Especially when you're chugging down Energon Cubes? Take me on! And I'll take you to school!" Brawn had set up an Autobot drinking competition, which he was confident he was going to win easily.
"YOU'RE gonna end up paintin' the town red when ah win! Count me in Brawn!" Ironhide stepped up to the challenge.
"You're not gonna win! I can feel it!" moaned Huffer.
"That's right Huffer! Ol' Ironhide ain't cut for chugging!"
"And neither are YOU! Cos I'm gonna win!" Huffer stepped up.
"I have a suspicion that I am going to win! HA HA!" Hound entered too, he felt overly confident that he would win.
The contestants took their places at the table with a stack of Energon cubes at their side each.
"All right! Are y'all ready? 3-2-1... CHUG!!!" Jazz started off the competition, as every one started chanting, but after only 2 Energon Cubes, Huffer was drunk, and promptly collapsed, Ratchet and First Aid ran over to see if he was okay, whilst Ironhide, Brawn and Hound kept drinking.
About 10 Energon Cubes later, Brawn started feeling tipsy, and was being beaten at his own game! It was just down to Ironhide and Hound. After 20 more Energon Cubes, Ironhide couldn't drink any more, and collapsed onto the table. Hound had won, or had he?
"And the winner is... HOUND!" announced Prime.
Grimlock was thirsty and wanted an Energon Cube.
"Me Grimlock! Really thirsty!" Grimlock picked up an Energon Cube from Hound's pile.
"No Grimlock! NO!" said Hound. Grimlock tried to drink the Energon, but none seemed to come out!
"Me Grimlock! Not know why Energon won't come out!" Grimlock tossed the Cube, which then landed in front of Perceptor, who transformed into his Microscope mode and examined the Cube.
"Hmm... the light patterns occurring across these vectors would indicate that Hound has cheated."
"HE CHEATED! He made holograms of Energon Cubes! Get him!" said Prowl as he and several other Autobots chased after Hound.
"Oh-oh! Looks like I've been found out!" Hound ran off.
"And the REAL winner is... Ironhide!" Ironhide got up, in a drunken state and collapsed onto Grimlock.
"I... won... whut? Issshh that... you Ratchhet? Jjjust keep yer damn handssh offff mah partssh."
"Me Grimlock! Not Ratchet!"
Soon, the Autobots gathered around the giant Wedding Cake that Wheeljack made to see Spike and Carly cut it. After they cut themselves a piece, Grimlock saw the cake, and transformed into his Dino mode.
"Me Grimlock! Must eat giant Cake!" Grimlock forced the other Autobots out of the way, grabbed the cake, and in a disgusting display of gluttony, ate the cake entirely!
"Nice going Dino-butt! Now there's no Cake left for us!" said Hoist.
"Me... Grimlock... feel... bloated... Cake was delicious!"
Bumblebee decided to stop the issue from ruining Spike and Carly's night by delivering his best man's speech.
"Can I have your attention for a moment?" The Autobots turned around to hear Bumblebee deliver his speech.
"I've known Spike for 9 years! Since we first went to Spy on the Decepticons' Space Bridge! I left him behind, but I managed to save him from being sent to Cybertron and instead, Megatron fell into his own Spacebridge! We all thought he was lost forever! Spike was gutsy little guy! He had an eye for adventure, and didn't seem to care for the dangers involved! I don't know how many times this has left poor old Sparkplug worried, but it sure is a lot! After all, he is a human, and we're trying to stop the Decepticons from devastating this planet, whilst at the same time, fighting to stop them taking Cybertron!
I remember when we had to go fetch some device for Wheeljack's invention, and we stopped in the Arcade, and met a pretty young girl. The one who is now married to Spike! They both saved all our lives when they went to Cybertron to retrieve Cybertronium. We owe our lives to Spike, and Carly!" Everyone applauded. "And now, I invite you all to take to the dance floor, for DJ Blaster's Party of the Century!!"
"Alright! Let's party!" shouted out most of the Autobots.
"Me Grimlock ready to Party!"
"Not so fast guys, it's time for Spike and Carly's first romantic dance as man and wife!"
"Awww man! I got my dance moves ready to roll!" said Jazz.
"Yo! This is DJ Blaster, I'll make you dance faster! But only after the happy couple have their dance!"
Carly walked over to Blaster and whispered something to him.
"No problemo, it ain't lameo!" said Blaster. Carly walked back towards Spike.
"Let me show you... something..." she said in a sultry, seductive tone.
Spike and Carly stood in the middle of the dance floor, holding each other as 'Tango' by Status Quo begun to play. They started by dancing really close, with the normal twirling and sidestepping. Then Carly started doing spins whilst holding Spike's hand at the same time.
"Not a bad couple! They can sure boogie!" said Jazz.
Then they got real close to each other and started moving up and down in a sexual way with their waists almost touching. Some Autobots started to get noisy.
"Alright! WOO!! Get in there!" shouted out Sideswipe.
"This is the part you'll like..." said Carly, as she broke off, and started to do her own dance as she started wiggling her body with her back turned. Then she caressed herself sexily. The Autobots really started to get rowdy.
"Yeah baby!! Oh yeah baby! Groovy!" shouted out Beachcomber.
But Tracks started to feel a little worried.
"Oh dear, what is she doing?" he said cowering in a girlish manner.
Then Carly started tugging her dress and twirling like a flamenco dancer. Spike started to feel turned on. Then she started dancing around in a circle and pulled her dress really high revealing her garter-clad legs. Now everybody was rowdy, shouting out.
"The reaction towards Carly's sexual and seductive dancing would indicate that we are all sexually aroused." Said Perceptor.
"In other words Perceptor?" said Magnus. Tracks was freaked out with what he was seeing, and covered his eyes.
"Oh this is shameful! I can't bear any more of this!"
"HA! What a wuss Tracks is! Can't even bear to watch a hot looking human babe!" teased Magnus.
"That's because Tracks is gay." Prime whispered to Ultra Magnus.
Then Spike and Carly finished the dance and were draped in each other's arms, sweating and panting. Then Blaster put on 'YMCA' by the Village People, and Tracks came rushing onto the dance floor.
"Autobots! It's time to Party!" said Prime. Most of the Autobots took to the dance floor. Spike and Carly went and sat down at a table with Bumblebee, Carly sat on Spike's knee and wrapped her arms around him.
"Wow Carly! I haven't seen you dance like that for a long time!" said Spike.
"Hey... it's what used to turn you on, and you turn me on..."
Red Alert took a load of Energon Cubes over to a table where First Aid was keeping Huffer – who was still drunk after the drinking competition – and started chugging them down.
"Hey hey! Go easy on those Energon Cubes!" said First Aid.
"What if I don't? Somebody will steal them and Iiiiiii......." Red Alert went crazy and ran over to the dance floor and started flipping and jumping around like a madman.
"What a crazy guy! But he can't fly!" said Blaster.
"Alright Red Alert, we think you've had enough now." Said Hot Spot as he and Inferno walked over and backed him into a corner.
"Get away from me! I am the great Zburgol!"
"Perhaps this will help you cool off!" said Inferno as he and Hot Spot started shooting foam at Red Alert, which calmed him down.
Then Blaster put on "No Limits" by 2 Unlimited.
"Hey! There ain't no Limit! Swing it!"
"Alright! Make way for the Dancing King!" said Jazz, who took off his Dinner Jacket started break dancing.
He started doing spinning on the floor on his back and back flipped out of it into a handstand.
"Hey! Cool moves Jazz!" said Sunstreaker.
Jazz then flipped back onto his feet and did a Moonwalk and then flipped into a backward roll, and into a Cartwheel roll.
"He sure lives up to his 'Dancing King' title!" said Prowl.
And to finish it off, he flipped into a forward roll, and back flipped out of it.
"Oh yeah! All hail the King of the Dance floor!" shouted out Jazz as everybody cheered him.
Prime and Ultra Magnus were telling each other old stories and recent events.
"You know Magnus, the Aerialbots travelled back to the Golden Age of Cybertron a few years ago."
"The Golden Age? WOW!"
"Reminded me of the old story of a Cybertronian named 'Orion Pax' his girlfriend 'Ariel' and his best friend 'Dion'. They all admired Megatron because he was powerful, but Megatron shot them, and the Aerialbots took Orion to my creator, Alpha Trion. And Orion was re-built... into me!"
"I wish I remembered who my creator was... or even my creation date!"
"Ariel was re-built into Elita-One, and Dion was..."
Meanwhile. Bluestreak stood by the large stack of Energon Cubes noticing Prime and Magnus were coming to get another cube. It gave Bluestreak an idea for a prank as he took out a bottle of Vodka.
"HAHA! I can't wait to see what Prime thinks to my special cocktail! It'll get him drunk!" Bluestreak took some cubes and poured some Vodka in whilst nobody was looking. "Here chief! Have one on me!"
"Thanks Bluestreak..." but just as Prime was about to be handed the Energon Cube, Magnus took the cube and chugged it down fast!
"Oops! Sorry Prime! But I needed that fast! Last time I had some Energon was back aaaahhhhttssshhh.... Heyyyy I caaaannn'ttsh deal with thatshhh now!" Ultra Magnus was the victim of Bluestreak's little prank as Bluestreak began to back away innocently. Prime look suspicious, but found the prank funny as he chuckled to himself.
"Bluestreak!" Bluestreak thought he was about to be found out. "Good idea! There's nothing like a prank at a party!" Bluestreak began spiking more Energon Cubes and handing them out.
Spike Carly and Bumblebee stepped outside the Gazebo; Bumblebee stood looking at the stars and the full moon.
"You know, you both look like a cute couple!" said Bumblebee.
Spike and Carly sat down on a rock, and gazed at the sky. Holding each other's hands.
"Oh Spike, that full moon... it's beautiful..."
"It is Carly... but it isn't as beautiful as you..." said Spike, as he rubbed his hand on Carly's shoulder, and removed one of her dress straps from her shoulder.
"Oh yeah! OH YEAH!" gasped Carly as she began to undo Spike's shirt.
"Actually Carly, I think that's not a good idea, especially with Bumblebee around."
"I'll save it for later... you handsome hunk!" instead, the two shared their first long, passionate kiss under the full moon.
Just then, a drunken Cliffjumper - who was a victim of Bluestreak's prank of mixing Vodka with Energon Cubes – walked outside. And started shooting at the moon! Thinking it was Starscream coming to attack!
"LOOK OUT!!! IT'S A DECEPTICON!!!"
"Cliffjumper! What are you doing?" Bumblebee ran over and knocked Cliffjumper onto the ground.
"Starscream's come to gatecrash the party!!!"
"It isn't! It's just a full moon! Bluestreak mixed Vodka with the Energon cubes!"
"WHAT?? Damn that prankster!" Cliffjumper started to feel more sober.
Carly went back inside to get Spike a glass of champagne and a glass of Energon for Bumblebee. On her way back, she tripped over Slag's tail and spilt Energon and Champagne on none other than Sunstreaker!
"HEY! My paint job! It'll take me hours to clean that off! Wait till I find out who..." Sunstreaker noticed Carly was the one who did it. "Hey baby! I forgive ya for spilling all over my sexy paint job! Wanna dance?" Carly giggled and Sunstreaker escorted her to the dance floor. "Hey Blaster! Lay it on me man!"
"Alright! I feel light!" said Blaster, who was rhyming terribly. Blaster put on Sunstreaker's favourite song, 'I'm too Sexy' by Right Said Fred. And Sunstreaker removed his dinner jacket and started dancing with Carly.
"Hey I'm just too sexy for my alt mode baby! Am I too sexy for you?" said Sunstreaker. Carly was laughing. Then things began to shake up as Grimlock transformed into Dino mode and took to the dance floor.
"Me Grimlock get down!"
"Oh-oh! It's no earthquake! But Grimlock can shake!" Blaster then put on 'Let's get ready to Rumble' by Ant and Dec. "An' the best part is that you can't tumble, cos where's Frenzy and Rumble?"
Just then the rest of the Dinobots came onto the Dance floor.
"Me Slag love this song!"
"Make room for the REAL dancing kings!" said Sludge, knocking Jazz, Sunstreaker and Sideswipe off the dance floor.
"Swoop say this party great!!"
"Me Grimlock say party on!!"
Later on after the party had finished, the Autobots gathered back inside the Ark, as it was time for Spike and Carly to go on their Honeymoon. It had been a great night. Most of the Autobots got drunk, Spike and Carly were married, and Prime was reunified with Ultra Magus.
"I'm gonna miss you Spike! You take care of yourselves!" said Sparkplug, emotionally.
"Don't worry Dad, we will! We may even send a post-card!"
Bumblebee transformed.
"All right! It's time for the happy couple to go on their Honeymoon!" Cliffjumper stuck a 'Just Married' sign on the back of Bumblebee. The Autobots all gathered around – wearing their untied bow ties around their necks, and their Dinner Jackets with Energon spilt on them – to see the happy couple depart.
"Have a safe journey! And a nice honeymoon!" said Prime.
Bumblebee drove off, carrying Spike and Carly inside. The Autobots went back to either drinking, or standing around drunk.
"This was sure, one hell of a party! I've gotta get back to Autobot City now!" Ultra Magnus transformed into Car-Carrier mode.
"But Magnus..."
"I'll see you again Prime!" Ultra Magnus headed for the exit of the Ark, but unfortunately crashed into a wall, as he was still drunk. "Ohhh... actually... I might as well stay." He groaned as he transformed.
Soon, all the Autobots were laid out on the floor, either under the influence of Energon or they couldn't be bothered to step into their recharge units, most with headaches, some still malfunctioning from Bluestreak spiking the Energon Cubes with Vodka. But there was one who was still sober, Wheeljack. He compiled the data the cameras had recorded and started inputting it into Teletraan 1, so the next morning, the Autobots would wake up and see how they made fools of themselves.
"HEH HEH HA HA HAA!! When they wake up with a hangover, this is gonna be the perfect cure! Reminding them of how they made idiots out of themselves!"
Bumblebee pulled up on the same Cliff-edge where Spike proposed Marriage. Spike and Carly were in the back seats of Bumblebee, holding and caressing each other.
"Our first night together as man and wife..." said Carly.
"Today has been the best day of my life... now that I am married to someone as beautiful as you... Carly..."
"Oh... you don't have to use such romantic words Spike... especially now I'm married to someone sexy as you... Spike..." Carly lay backwards onto her seat, Spike leaned over her. "Yes... oh yes! You are a sexy beast Spike!" Carly began unbuttoning Spike's shirt and trousers, revealing his muscular chest and arms.
"And you... are... one hot mama Carly!" groaned Spike, as he slowly slid Carly's dress up to her waist, revealing her panties, and garters.
"Oh, Spike!" groaned Carly, as the two began to make love.
9 months have passed since that magical evening, Carly was pregnant and the baby was due as Spike sat with her in the sickbay of Autobot City. Carly began to feel pains.
"Oh... OH!! THE BABY! IT'S COMING!!"
Ratchet and First Aid came running in.
"Alright First Aid, I'll keep an eye on these readings, you deliver the baby!"
"Deliver the baby?! I can't do that!"
"Look First Aid! It's simple, you just catch the baby when it comes out!"
"Uggh! I don't wanna see her thingies!"
"When I'm not around! You'll have to take care of stuff like that! Just do it!"
"Okay! Here goes..." First Aid stood in front of Carly waiting to deliver the baby. Ultra Magnus, Ironhide, Kup, Springer and Blurr came in.
"Wheresthebabywheresthebaby? AmItoolatetoolatetoolate? NoIcantbebecauseIcandothingsfasterthaneverybody!" said Blurr.
"This reminds me of the time on..."
"Save your stories till later Kup! The baby can't hear ya!"
"And what do you know? You stole Chromia from me!"
"Alright break it up old timers! You're gonna miss it!" said Springer, stepping in between Ironhide and Kup.
"Here it comes... ugh god!" said First Aid. The baby came out and landed in a towel First Aid was holding.
"Congratulations! It's a boy!" said Ratchet.
"What shall we call him Spike?"
"How about... Daniel?" First Aid passed Daniel to Spike who held him for a while. Hot Rod and Arcee came in holding each other's hand.
"Are we too late?" asked Hot Rod.
"Late again lad! HA! See Ironhide? I told you he'd be late!"
"Can I see the baby Spike?" asked Hot Rod. Spike passed Daniel to Hot Rod. "Aww... isn't he cute?" Daniel grinned babyishly at Hot Rod. "You think you're my little brother huh? Yes you are! Hey Magnus! You wanna hold the baby?"
"I can't deal with that now! You can pass Daniel back to Carly now."
For Spike and Carly, the past 9 months had been a very special. They were now married, and also parents of a Young boy named Daniel.
2004 JRisindahouse Fan Fiction
With Special thanks to Exulted_Unicron of Seibertron
Bumblebee headed towards a cliff-edge overlooking the sea, and a full moon, with Spike and Carly sitting inside. Carly looked at Spike in the eyes.
"What are we here for Spike?"
"You'll see!"
Fireworks suddenly lit up the clear, sky, in fabulous explosions that Carly had never seen before, her eyes widened with emotion as she put her arms around Spike.
After the final firework turned the sky red, then came the moment of truth for Spike.
"We've been seeing each other for 9 years, 9 years of wonderful nights, 9 years of emotion. Carly, will you join me in marriage?" he said nervously. Carly looked shocked for a moment,
"Yes, I will!" she hugged Spike, knocking him onto the seat, as the two began to kiss.
"Looks like I've got a wedding to arrange..." said Bumblebee to himself. Unaware to them, Laserbeak had been listening to every word that had been said, he hastily returned to the Decepticon headquarters, and perched on Soundwave's arm.
"Laserbeak, report." Laserbeak entered Soundwave's chest and played back everything he heard, whilst Megatron looked on, unimpressed, he instantly turned towards Starscream and threw an Energon Cube at him.
"You asshole Starscream!! You thought Bumblebee was hear to attack us, and instead, it's just so the flesh creatures could have a romantic evening!"
"How was I supposed to know that?? Even you wouldn't know! No wonder we haven't defeated those Auto-b*****s!"
"Any more of your foul language and I'll blast you into tiny pieces and jump on them!" Starscream walked away grumpily.
The next morning at the Ark, Bumblebee was up early, sat on a rock, watching the sunrise, thinking where and how to arrange Spike and Carly's wedding.
"I gotta find out how and where to do this wedding, but who can I tell?"
"Hey Bumblebee! You're up early!" shouted Jazz, as he walked over.
"Oh, err... hi Jazz!"
"What's up man? You sound nervous!"
"You know a lot about humans and such don't you?"
"I ain't kiddin'! Whaddya wanna know?"
"How would you react if I said... Spike and Carly were getting married?"
"Spike is getting married to that babe?! Come with me Bumblebee, it's gonna be a big day for you as well!" Jazz and Bumblebee walked back towards the Ark.
"Me? How come?"
"Cos there's no doubt Spike will choose you to be the best man!"
"Best man? What does he do?"
"Watch and find out! Yo, Teletraan! Show us how a wedding works!" Teletraan- 1 displayed a wedding procedure.
"Now the best man, is the man who's responsible for keeping the wedding rings until the big day!" Prime walked into the control room, puzzled on why Bumblebee and Jazz were watching a wedding clip.
"What are you doing watching a wedding?"
"Spike and Carly are getting married!" said Bumblebee.
"Hmm... we should wait until the other Autobots are awakened..."
Eventually, all the other Autobots were in the control room around Teletraan-1, then Bumblebee decided to deliver the big news.
"Hey guys!"
"Hey whut? Is there any Decepti-creeps coming? I feel in the mood for some trashin' today!" said Ironhide.
"Not quite Ironhide... Spike and Carly are going to get married!" The other Autobots looked puzzled at each other.
"As the best man, it's my job to arrange the wedding. Any suggestions as to how and where we're gonna do it?"
"Why don't we do it here? I could neaten up the place with some Holograms, and be the grooms-man!" said Hound, demonstrating what holograms he could use.
"Why don't we wear those Dinner-jackets those humans wear? It'll go especially well with my paint-job!" said Sunstreaker.
"An' I could be the DJ for the after Ceremony party! I'll get you all down on the dance floor!" said Blaster.
"Now who's gonna preside over the ceremony?" asked Prime.
"Call me 'Reverend Jazz' and I'll make them man and wife." Jazz stepped forward.
"As I believe the humans say, 'Amen Reverend'! And I know exactly who I am going to invite to this wedding. Let's get to work."
Later on, Spike and Carly took a ride in Bumblebee, mainly to discuss arrangements for the wedding.
"When are ya gonna hold the wedding Spike?" asked Bumblebee.
"I don't know Bumblebee." Carly then laid her head on Spike's shoulder and wrapped her arms around him. "How about... this Friday?"
Wheeljack was in his lab making the wedding cake. But also at the he had to keep the Dinobots at bay from toying with his inventions and the wedding cake mixture, especially Grimlock.
"Me Grimlock! Love Wheeljack's inventions!"
"Get away Grimlock! This is no invention!" Slag and Snarl were busy staring at one of Wheeljack's inventions that he was working on.
"Tell Slag what this weird thing is!" said Slag. Wheeljack walked over, and put it away in a storage unit.
"Let's just say... it's gonna be a perfect cure for what the humans call 'hangovers'."
"Hangover?! What's a hangover? Tell Grimlock what a hangover is!"
"You'll find out soon enough!" Wheeljack went back to making the wedding cake. Hound was making holograms of decorations for the wedding.
"Tell me Mirage, which Hologram do you think is better, these flowers, or this heart?"
"Hmm... the flowers!"
"Has anyone checked how many Energon Cubes we have? I mean, we're gonna be drinking a lot on Friday night!" said Bluestreak. "Maybe we should pay the Decepticons a visit..." said Hound.
"Then let's do it!" said Mirage.
In the Decepticon base, Starscream had been left behind to guard the base whilst the others had gone to take a shipment of Energon cubes to Cybertron.
"Starscream, stay behind! You can't be trusted! You couldn't lead androids to a picnic! I'LL SHOW MEGATRON!"
Suddenly a Hologram of Megatron appeared right behind Starscream, and Starscream thought it really was Megatron. Horrified of what he thought would happen; Starscream dropped to his knees and started begging.
"OH! Forgive me Megatron! I'm not worthy! I'M NOT WORTHY!!! FORGIVE ME ALMIGHTY LEADER! I THINK YOU'RE THE BEST!"
Mirage - being invisible – managed to steal some Energon Cubes and met Hound back outside the room Starscream was in, whilst he was still begging.
"I got 'em Hound! Let's go!"
Hound disengaged the Hologram of Megatron and made a run for it.
"AUTOBOTS!!!! IT WAS JUST A HOLOGRAM!!! YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS!!"
But just then, the rest of the Decepticons returned, much to the horror of Starscream.
"Starscream, what in the world are you doing?" asked Megatron.
"Eh... err... I was just exaggerating what would happen if..."
"Megatron, a stack of our Energon Cubes has been stolen." Said Soundwave. Megatron began to walk towards Starscream.
"Starscream... you are an incompetent idiot!!!" Megatron pointed his Fusion Cannon at Starscream.
Back at the Ark, Hound and Mirage were gloating over how they managed to steal Energon Cubes from the Decepticons.
"Heh-heh! Latest Import! Energon Cube Export! So good, the Decepticons hate to see it being stolen!" said Mirage.
"We've got enough Energon Cubes here to paint the town red!" said Hound.
Prime then returned with Brawn. Brawn opened the back of Prime's trailer and removed a giant roll of black material.
"What'cha gonna do with that roll of material Prime?" asked Ironhide.
"We're going to make ourselves some dinner-suits."
"Ratchet cut out a jacket and bow tie from the material, and Prime tried the tie and jacket on."
"How do I look?"
"It suits you Prime!" remarked Ratchet.
Soon, the other Autobots were trying on their dinner jackets.
"I love it! It matches my new paint job perfectly!" said Sunstreaker.
"I'd say it is a Masterpiece!" said Grapple.
Just then, Tracks rolled in and transformed.
"I've been out to get something... THIS HAT!" Tracks pulled out a very girlish-hat, which caused everyone else to burst out laughing. "Oh dear, I still think it is so gorgeous, it's very stylish and it is SO me!" he said, standing in a girlish pose, unaware of his homosexual behaviour.
That night, Spike, Chip, Bumblebee and Hound held a secret bachelor's party by visiting a Strip Club.
"Make the most of this night Spike, for it'll be you last night as a single guy!" said Chip.
"I will Chip, don't you worry!" They gathered around a small stage, and a sexy looking Peruvian girl came out. Unknown to her and Spike, they once knew each other. The Peruvian girl unbuttoned her dress much to the pleasure of everyone.
"Alright! Take it off babe!" shouted Bumblebee. But then, the girl recognized Spike.
"Spike? Is that you?"
"Juanita?"
"Oh Spike!" Juanita stepped off the stage and hugged Spike. Oh I haven't seen you for a long time...we need to see each other more often.
"Uh, yeah, but I'm getting married tomorrow..." Juanita looked shocked after what Spike told her.
"You're still single tonight, come with me sexy-boy!" Juanita walked off with Spike into her dressing room.
"Damn she's gone! Now what are we gonna do?" said Bumblebee.
"I've got an ace up my sleeve!" Hound produced a hologram of Autobot femme fatale Arcee, which Hound was able to make dance for them. Meanwhile in Juanita's dressing room, her and Spike were making up for the time they spent apart.
"You know Spike... I've been waiting to do this for many years." Juanita unbuttoned her dress, and removed it slowly, and sexily revealing her underwear, and a very sexy figure.
"Woah! You should be Miss Peru!" said Spike.
"I am... now get that shirt off you sexy beast!" Juanita unbuttoned Spike's shirt as they began to make out and kiss... but this was the last time Spike would kiss another woman, for the big day was tomorrow.
Friday came along; it was to be a big day not only for Spike and Carly, but also for the Autobots. At dawn, Prime stepped outside the Ark to watch the sunrise. Red sky, no clouds, all set for a perfect day. He could see a white coloured car carrier heading towards the Ark. Prime looked on as though he knew what it was. The car carrier came to a stop, and transformed into what was Optimus Prime's oldest friend, Ultra Magnus.
"Ultra Magnus!"
"Prime!"
"It's good to see you again old friend!" The two shook hands.
"Same to you! My journey from Autobot City took longer than expected! It's not easy finding the Ark, especially when there's miles and miles of desert around me! Anyway, I bet this is gonna be some Wedding! I've never met Spike or Carly." Prime and Magnus walked back inside the Ark.
The Aerialbots were busy preparing their post-ceremony flying display.
"Okay guys! We've got to get the final part of our show right!" said Silverbolt.
"Nah, we're getting it right! You keep screwing up Mr. Scared-of-heights!"
"Slingshot! How many times have I told you not to call me that?"
"Yeah, well I'm the fastest, smartest, hottest jet you ever saw!" Slingshot began to brag.
"Don't forget why we're doing this, it's for the humans getting married!" said Fireflight.
"Huh! Stupid humans! What did they ever do for US? Well that Carly woman is so hot, I wish she was..."
"Why don't ya try out my fireworks guys?" Wheeljack approached the Aerialbots with a load of dangerously unreliable looking fireworks.
"No way! I remember what happened when we last used YOUR fireworks!" said Silverbolt, remembering that Wheeljack's fireworks were so dangerous; they flew out of control and started attacking the Autobots themselves!
"I guess I'll just keep them for next time the Decepticons decide to attack us!" On his way back to the Ark, Wheeljack planted some small cameras inside the Gazebo where the post-ceremony party would be held. "When the other Autobots awaken with a bad hangover, I'm gonna give them a cure that not even Ratchet would be able to find!"
Blaster was busy setting up the dance-floor and DJ equipment for the party after the ceremony and getting his records together.
"Man, this is gonna be ONE Party!"
"I hope you put on some good music on! Cos I'm gonna be the Dancing-King!" said Jazz, wearing a white robe and a gold chain.
"DJ Blaster never plays a lame song! I should be workin' on Ibiza!"
"Oh yeah! Sun, sand, sea, babes and partying! My idea of a holiday island!"
As the Wedding came closer, the Autobots started to get ready for the big occasion. The Autobots were being waxed up by Ratchet.
"Come on Ratchet! I'm not nearly shiny enough!" moaned Sunstreaker.
"No way! You've had more than your fair share of wax! If I put any more on, I won't be able to wax everyone! And besides, if you were any more shinier, you'd blind my optic sensors!"
Wheeljack finished baking the Wedding cake. And presented it to the other Autobots.
"Fellow Autobots, BEHOLD! La piece de resistance!"
"Me Grimlock! Want piece of wedding cake!" Grimlock ran up and tried to steal a bit of the cake but Wheeljack had put a force field around the cake stopping any one from eating it, thus causing Grimlock to bounce off it! "Me Grimlock! Not fond of Wheeljack's inventions!"
"I though you said you loved my inventions."
"Hmmm... me never thought of that!"
Spike stepped out of his dressing room in his wedding suit to see Bumblebee, Sparkplug and Chip Chase.
"Well how do I look?"
"You look great Spike! I can't believe your big day has finally come! I'm glad I chose not to have a boring old meeting with Bill Gates! What a nerd!" said Chip.
"You made the right decision Chip! Have you still got those rings Bumblebee?"
"Right here Spike! And err... how do I look?"
"Just like any human would! Just why I chose you to be the 'Best Man'." "I'm so proud of you son! I knew the day would come when you and Carly would marry..."
"Thanks, Dad!" Spike and Sparkplug hugged each other.
Ironhide was at Carly's house to pick her up for the wedding. Carly had finished getting into her Wedding Dress, and stepped out of her house to show Ironhide, who had volunteered to escort Carly. Her wedding dress was beautifully made, bright white, elegant and would make the Autobots wish they were human.
"How do I look Ironhide?"
"You look as beautiful as Chromia did the day I met her..."
"YOU have a girlfriend?"
"Yep, back on Cybertron, I met Chromia like er... a long time ago. I remember she wus hanging around with Kup! He was such a seducer back then!"
"Kup eh?" said Ultra Magnus who had stopped by whilst in town. "I remember him telling me how you robbed him of Chromia! He's looking forward to the day he sees you again! So he can get even! HA HA HA!"
"Hey! What'cha doin' here Magnus? Shouldn't ya be back at headquarters?"
"Oh I was in town to get some champagne for the humans and I happened to stop by to see how this old timer was getting on."
"Old timer? That's something you'll never be if you don't get back to the Ark!"
"Alright, alright! See you at the ceremony!" Magnus transformed and headed back to the Ark.
"Well thanks for volunteering to escort me Ironhide, I never had any parents, or at least we don't know what happened to them..."
"Hey, come on... let's get there. I'm gonna have to get cleaned up again as well, Ratchet's gonna have a field day cleanin' mah parts when I keep telling him to get off 'em!" Ironhide transformed and Carly got inside.
The Autobots gathered around Teletraan-1 for the big ceremony looking smart in their dinner jackets and bow ties, and also after being waxed up by Ratchet. Hound decorated the place with Holograms.
"The atmosphere of excitement and intensity would suggest that it's going to be a good wedding." Said Perceptor.
"No it won't, Bumblebee will lose the rings, Jazz won't know what to do and the Aerialbot's flying show will fail." Moaned Huffer.
"Ahh shut up Mr. Moan-mouth, you just moan and complain all the time!" said Gears.
"Says you!" said Huffer.
Ironhide arrived, Carly got out, and Ironhide was then unexpectedly squirted by Inferno and Hot Spot's hoses.
"LEAKIN' LUBRICANTS!"
"Ratchet had us wait till you got back so we could clean you up, can't have you looking all dusty! It might get on Carly's beautiful dress! Damn she looks hot! Shall I put out the fire?" said Inferno.
"Well ah hope Firestar didn't hear that, now get back inside, I've got to escort this young lady!"
"Well... this is it..." said Carly nervously.
"Ah don't worry, it'll be over in Astro-seconds!" said Ironhide.
The moment everyone had been waiting for came. Carly and Ironhide entered, Blaster transformed and began to play 'Here comes the Bride'. The Autobots turned around to see Carly and Ironhide proceed towards the pulpit. Where Spike and Bumblebee were stood waiting nervously.
"Dinobots, draw your swords!" said Grimlock. The Dinobots drew their swords and held them above Ironhide and Carly, forming an arch shape as they walked through. The ceremony began.
"Dear y'all! We're gathered inside the Ark in front of noble Teletraan-1, to witness a wedlock between Spike and Carly! Spike, do you take this beautiful gal Carly, to be your wedded wife?"
"...I do."
"Carly, do you take this handsome young man Spike, to be your wedded husband?"
"I do."
Bumblebee handed Spike and Carly the wedding rings.
"Now recite after me Spike! I, Spike, take you, Carly, to be my wedded wife. With deepest joy I receive you into my life that together we may be one. I promise you my deepest love, my fullest devotion, my tender care. I pledge to you my life as a loving and faithful husband."
Spike held Carly's hand and slowly, put the wedding ring on her 4th finger as he nervously began to recite the words Jazz said.
"I, Spike, take you, Carly, to be my wedded wife. With deepest joy I receive you into my life that together we may be one. I promise you my deepest love, my fullest devotion, my tender care. I pledge to you my life as a loving and faithful husband."
"Carly, recite after me! I, Carly, take you, Spike, to be my wedded husband. With deepest joy I come into my new life with you. Through the pressures of the present and the uncertainties of the future I promise to be faithful to you. I will love, serve, and obey you as long as we both are alive. I pledge to you my life as a loving and faithful wife."
Carly held Spikes hand, and slowly put the wedding ring on as they both looked at each other in the eyes, knowing how deep their own love for each other was.
"I, Carly, take you, Spike, to be my wedded husband. With deepest joy I come into my new life with you. Through the pressures of the present and the uncertainties of the future I promise to be faithful to you. I will love, serve, and obey you as long as we both are alive. I pledge to you my life as a loving and faithful wife..."
"With the power invested in me by my Central Processor, I pronounce you Man, and wife! You may kiss the bride!"
Spike and Carly kissed, all the Autobots cheered.
"You know Prime, it's a time like this that brings a tear to my optics." said Ultra Magnus, overcome with emotion.
"Too true Magnus, it's a beautiful occasion."
At the back, Powerglide had burst into tears.
"This is so beautiful! I wish I had decided to marry Astoria!"
"Err... ain't you got your own babe on Cybertron?" said Beachcomber, trying to comfort Powerglide.
"Ahhh, screw Moonracer, she's a bitch!"
"Autobots! Gather outside for the Aerialbots Stunt show!" said Prime.
Everyone gathered outside the Ark to see the Aerialbots already in the sky, waiting to start their stunt show.
"Okay Aerialbots! Let's do it!" said Silverbolt. The show started off with typical barrel rolls, proceeding to loops followed by dive-bombs and synchronised manoeuvres. Powerglide looked on with jealousy.
"Huh! Why couldn't I be part of the show? I'm better than all 5 Aerialbots put together!"
Then came dangerous acrobatic manoeuvres and close quarters flying. Then to top it off, a high dive flowing into the perfect landing which Silverbolt was dreading.
"I gotta do it! This is a big occasion! I don't want to be slagged off by that idiot Slingshot! Gotta... do... it!!!" Silverbolt had gone so high he was barely visible from the ground and then dived at high speed along with the other Aerialbots and managed to land safely and they all transformed the moment they came to a halt. The others cheered.
"I... I'll never go through THAT again!" gasped Silverbolt
"Roll up! Roll up for the Autobot drinking competition! Are you tough enough to stay sober? Especially when you're chugging down Energon Cubes? Take me on! And I'll take you to school!" Brawn had set up an Autobot drinking competition, which he was confident he was going to win easily.
"YOU'RE gonna end up paintin' the town red when ah win! Count me in Brawn!" Ironhide stepped up to the challenge.
"You're not gonna win! I can feel it!" moaned Huffer.
"That's right Huffer! Ol' Ironhide ain't cut for chugging!"
"And neither are YOU! Cos I'm gonna win!" Huffer stepped up.
"I have a suspicion that I am going to win! HA HA!" Hound entered too, he felt overly confident that he would win.
The contestants took their places at the table with a stack of Energon cubes at their side each.
"All right! Are y'all ready? 3-2-1... CHUG!!!" Jazz started off the competition, as every one started chanting, but after only 2 Energon Cubes, Huffer was drunk, and promptly collapsed, Ratchet and First Aid ran over to see if he was okay, whilst Ironhide, Brawn and Hound kept drinking.
About 10 Energon Cubes later, Brawn started feeling tipsy, and was being beaten at his own game! It was just down to Ironhide and Hound. After 20 more Energon Cubes, Ironhide couldn't drink any more, and collapsed onto the table. Hound had won, or had he?
"And the winner is... HOUND!" announced Prime.
Grimlock was thirsty and wanted an Energon Cube.
"Me Grimlock! Really thirsty!" Grimlock picked up an Energon Cube from Hound's pile.
"No Grimlock! NO!" said Hound. Grimlock tried to drink the Energon, but none seemed to come out!
"Me Grimlock! Not know why Energon won't come out!" Grimlock tossed the Cube, which then landed in front of Perceptor, who transformed into his Microscope mode and examined the Cube.
"Hmm... the light patterns occurring across these vectors would indicate that Hound has cheated."
"HE CHEATED! He made holograms of Energon Cubes! Get him!" said Prowl as he and several other Autobots chased after Hound.
"Oh-oh! Looks like I've been found out!" Hound ran off.
"And the REAL winner is... Ironhide!" Ironhide got up, in a drunken state and collapsed onto Grimlock.
"I... won... whut? Issshh that... you Ratchhet? Jjjust keep yer damn handssh offff mah partssh."
"Me Grimlock! Not Ratchet!"
Soon, the Autobots gathered around the giant Wedding Cake that Wheeljack made to see Spike and Carly cut it. After they cut themselves a piece, Grimlock saw the cake, and transformed into his Dino mode.
"Me Grimlock! Must eat giant Cake!" Grimlock forced the other Autobots out of the way, grabbed the cake, and in a disgusting display of gluttony, ate the cake entirely!
"Nice going Dino-butt! Now there's no Cake left for us!" said Hoist.
"Me... Grimlock... feel... bloated... Cake was delicious!"
Bumblebee decided to stop the issue from ruining Spike and Carly's night by delivering his best man's speech.
"Can I have your attention for a moment?" The Autobots turned around to hear Bumblebee deliver his speech.
"I've known Spike for 9 years! Since we first went to Spy on the Decepticons' Space Bridge! I left him behind, but I managed to save him from being sent to Cybertron and instead, Megatron fell into his own Spacebridge! We all thought he was lost forever! Spike was gutsy little guy! He had an eye for adventure, and didn't seem to care for the dangers involved! I don't know how many times this has left poor old Sparkplug worried, but it sure is a lot! After all, he is a human, and we're trying to stop the Decepticons from devastating this planet, whilst at the same time, fighting to stop them taking Cybertron!
I remember when we had to go fetch some device for Wheeljack's invention, and we stopped in the Arcade, and met a pretty young girl. The one who is now married to Spike! They both saved all our lives when they went to Cybertron to retrieve Cybertronium. We owe our lives to Spike, and Carly!" Everyone applauded. "And now, I invite you all to take to the dance floor, for DJ Blaster's Party of the Century!!"
"Alright! Let's party!" shouted out most of the Autobots.
"Me Grimlock ready to Party!"
"Not so fast guys, it's time for Spike and Carly's first romantic dance as man and wife!"
"Awww man! I got my dance moves ready to roll!" said Jazz.
"Yo! This is DJ Blaster, I'll make you dance faster! But only after the happy couple have their dance!"
Carly walked over to Blaster and whispered something to him.
"No problemo, it ain't lameo!" said Blaster. Carly walked back towards Spike.
"Let me show you... something..." she said in a sultry, seductive tone.
Spike and Carly stood in the middle of the dance floor, holding each other as 'Tango' by Status Quo begun to play. They started by dancing really close, with the normal twirling and sidestepping. Then Carly started doing spins whilst holding Spike's hand at the same time.
"Not a bad couple! They can sure boogie!" said Jazz.
Then they got real close to each other and started moving up and down in a sexual way with their waists almost touching. Some Autobots started to get noisy.
"Alright! WOO!! Get in there!" shouted out Sideswipe.
"This is the part you'll like..." said Carly, as she broke off, and started to do her own dance as she started wiggling her body with her back turned. Then she caressed herself sexily. The Autobots really started to get rowdy.
"Yeah baby!! Oh yeah baby! Groovy!" shouted out Beachcomber.
But Tracks started to feel a little worried.
"Oh dear, what is she doing?" he said cowering in a girlish manner.
Then Carly started tugging her dress and twirling like a flamenco dancer. Spike started to feel turned on. Then she started dancing around in a circle and pulled her dress really high revealing her garter-clad legs. Now everybody was rowdy, shouting out.
"The reaction towards Carly's sexual and seductive dancing would indicate that we are all sexually aroused." Said Perceptor.
"In other words Perceptor?" said Magnus. Tracks was freaked out with what he was seeing, and covered his eyes.
"Oh this is shameful! I can't bear any more of this!"
"HA! What a wuss Tracks is! Can't even bear to watch a hot looking human babe!" teased Magnus.
"That's because Tracks is gay." Prime whispered to Ultra Magnus.
Then Spike and Carly finished the dance and were draped in each other's arms, sweating and panting. Then Blaster put on 'YMCA' by the Village People, and Tracks came rushing onto the dance floor.
"Autobots! It's time to Party!" said Prime. Most of the Autobots took to the dance floor. Spike and Carly went and sat down at a table with Bumblebee, Carly sat on Spike's knee and wrapped her arms around him.
"Wow Carly! I haven't seen you dance like that for a long time!" said Spike.
"Hey... it's what used to turn you on, and you turn me on..."
Red Alert took a load of Energon Cubes over to a table where First Aid was keeping Huffer – who was still drunk after the drinking competition – and started chugging them down.
"Hey hey! Go easy on those Energon Cubes!" said First Aid.
"What if I don't? Somebody will steal them and Iiiiiii......." Red Alert went crazy and ran over to the dance floor and started flipping and jumping around like a madman.
"What a crazy guy! But he can't fly!" said Blaster.
"Alright Red Alert, we think you've had enough now." Said Hot Spot as he and Inferno walked over and backed him into a corner.
"Get away from me! I am the great Zburgol!"
"Perhaps this will help you cool off!" said Inferno as he and Hot Spot started shooting foam at Red Alert, which calmed him down.
Then Blaster put on "No Limits" by 2 Unlimited.
"Hey! There ain't no Limit! Swing it!"
"Alright! Make way for the Dancing King!" said Jazz, who took off his Dinner Jacket started break dancing.
He started doing spinning on the floor on his back and back flipped out of it into a handstand.
"Hey! Cool moves Jazz!" said Sunstreaker.
Jazz then flipped back onto his feet and did a Moonwalk and then flipped into a backward roll, and into a Cartwheel roll.
"He sure lives up to his 'Dancing King' title!" said Prowl.
And to finish it off, he flipped into a forward roll, and back flipped out of it.
"Oh yeah! All hail the King of the Dance floor!" shouted out Jazz as everybody cheered him.
Prime and Ultra Magnus were telling each other old stories and recent events.
"You know Magnus, the Aerialbots travelled back to the Golden Age of Cybertron a few years ago."
"The Golden Age? WOW!"
"Reminded me of the old story of a Cybertronian named 'Orion Pax' his girlfriend 'Ariel' and his best friend 'Dion'. They all admired Megatron because he was powerful, but Megatron shot them, and the Aerialbots took Orion to my creator, Alpha Trion. And Orion was re-built... into me!"
"I wish I remembered who my creator was... or even my creation date!"
"Ariel was re-built into Elita-One, and Dion was..."
Meanwhile. Bluestreak stood by the large stack of Energon Cubes noticing Prime and Magnus were coming to get another cube. It gave Bluestreak an idea for a prank as he took out a bottle of Vodka.
"HAHA! I can't wait to see what Prime thinks to my special cocktail! It'll get him drunk!" Bluestreak took some cubes and poured some Vodka in whilst nobody was looking. "Here chief! Have one on me!"
"Thanks Bluestreak..." but just as Prime was about to be handed the Energon Cube, Magnus took the cube and chugged it down fast!
"Oops! Sorry Prime! But I needed that fast! Last time I had some Energon was back aaaahhhhttssshhh.... Heyyyy I caaaannn'ttsh deal with thatshhh now!" Ultra Magnus was the victim of Bluestreak's little prank as Bluestreak began to back away innocently. Prime look suspicious, but found the prank funny as he chuckled to himself.
"Bluestreak!" Bluestreak thought he was about to be found out. "Good idea! There's nothing like a prank at a party!" Bluestreak began spiking more Energon Cubes and handing them out.
Spike Carly and Bumblebee stepped outside the Gazebo; Bumblebee stood looking at the stars and the full moon.
"You know, you both look like a cute couple!" said Bumblebee.
Spike and Carly sat down on a rock, and gazed at the sky. Holding each other's hands.
"Oh Spike, that full moon... it's beautiful..."
"It is Carly... but it isn't as beautiful as you..." said Spike, as he rubbed his hand on Carly's shoulder, and removed one of her dress straps from her shoulder.
"Oh yeah! OH YEAH!" gasped Carly as she began to undo Spike's shirt.
"Actually Carly, I think that's not a good idea, especially with Bumblebee around."
"I'll save it for later... you handsome hunk!" instead, the two shared their first long, passionate kiss under the full moon.
Just then, a drunken Cliffjumper - who was a victim of Bluestreak's prank of mixing Vodka with Energon Cubes – walked outside. And started shooting at the moon! Thinking it was Starscream coming to attack!
"LOOK OUT!!! IT'S A DECEPTICON!!!"
"Cliffjumper! What are you doing?" Bumblebee ran over and knocked Cliffjumper onto the ground.
"Starscream's come to gatecrash the party!!!"
"It isn't! It's just a full moon! Bluestreak mixed Vodka with the Energon cubes!"
"WHAT?? Damn that prankster!" Cliffjumper started to feel more sober.
Carly went back inside to get Spike a glass of champagne and a glass of Energon for Bumblebee. On her way back, she tripped over Slag's tail and spilt Energon and Champagne on none other than Sunstreaker!
"HEY! My paint job! It'll take me hours to clean that off! Wait till I find out who..." Sunstreaker noticed Carly was the one who did it. "Hey baby! I forgive ya for spilling all over my sexy paint job! Wanna dance?" Carly giggled and Sunstreaker escorted her to the dance floor. "Hey Blaster! Lay it on me man!"
"Alright! I feel light!" said Blaster, who was rhyming terribly. Blaster put on Sunstreaker's favourite song, 'I'm too Sexy' by Right Said Fred. And Sunstreaker removed his dinner jacket and started dancing with Carly.
"Hey I'm just too sexy for my alt mode baby! Am I too sexy for you?" said Sunstreaker. Carly was laughing. Then things began to shake up as Grimlock transformed into Dino mode and took to the dance floor.
"Me Grimlock get down!"
"Oh-oh! It's no earthquake! But Grimlock can shake!" Blaster then put on 'Let's get ready to Rumble' by Ant and Dec. "An' the best part is that you can't tumble, cos where's Frenzy and Rumble?"
Just then the rest of the Dinobots came onto the Dance floor.
"Me Slag love this song!"
"Make room for the REAL dancing kings!" said Sludge, knocking Jazz, Sunstreaker and Sideswipe off the dance floor.
"Swoop say this party great!!"
"Me Grimlock say party on!!"
Later on after the party had finished, the Autobots gathered back inside the Ark, as it was time for Spike and Carly to go on their Honeymoon. It had been a great night. Most of the Autobots got drunk, Spike and Carly were married, and Prime was reunified with Ultra Magus.
"I'm gonna miss you Spike! You take care of yourselves!" said Sparkplug, emotionally.
"Don't worry Dad, we will! We may even send a post-card!"
Bumblebee transformed.
"All right! It's time for the happy couple to go on their Honeymoon!" Cliffjumper stuck a 'Just Married' sign on the back of Bumblebee. The Autobots all gathered around – wearing their untied bow ties around their necks, and their Dinner Jackets with Energon spilt on them – to see the happy couple depart.
"Have a safe journey! And a nice honeymoon!" said Prime.
Bumblebee drove off, carrying Spike and Carly inside. The Autobots went back to either drinking, or standing around drunk.
"This was sure, one hell of a party! I've gotta get back to Autobot City now!" Ultra Magnus transformed into Car-Carrier mode.
"But Magnus..."
"I'll see you again Prime!" Ultra Magnus headed for the exit of the Ark, but unfortunately crashed into a wall, as he was still drunk. "Ohhh... actually... I might as well stay." He groaned as he transformed.
Soon, all the Autobots were laid out on the floor, either under the influence of Energon or they couldn't be bothered to step into their recharge units, most with headaches, some still malfunctioning from Bluestreak spiking the Energon Cubes with Vodka. But there was one who was still sober, Wheeljack. He compiled the data the cameras had recorded and started inputting it into Teletraan 1, so the next morning, the Autobots would wake up and see how they made fools of themselves.
"HEH HEH HA HA HAA!! When they wake up with a hangover, this is gonna be the perfect cure! Reminding them of how they made idiots out of themselves!"
Bumblebee pulled up on the same Cliff-edge where Spike proposed Marriage. Spike and Carly were in the back seats of Bumblebee, holding and caressing each other.
"Our first night together as man and wife..." said Carly.
"Today has been the best day of my life... now that I am married to someone as beautiful as you... Carly..."
"Oh... you don't have to use such romantic words Spike... especially now I'm married to someone sexy as you... Spike..." Carly lay backwards onto her seat, Spike leaned over her. "Yes... oh yes! You are a sexy beast Spike!" Carly began unbuttoning Spike's shirt and trousers, revealing his muscular chest and arms.
"And you... are... one hot mama Carly!" groaned Spike, as he slowly slid Carly's dress up to her waist, revealing her panties, and garters.
"Oh, Spike!" groaned Carly, as the two began to make love.
9 months have passed since that magical evening, Carly was pregnant and the baby was due as Spike sat with her in the sickbay of Autobot City. Carly began to feel pains.
"Oh... OH!! THE BABY! IT'S COMING!!"
Ratchet and First Aid came running in.
"Alright First Aid, I'll keep an eye on these readings, you deliver the baby!"
"Deliver the baby?! I can't do that!"
"Look First Aid! It's simple, you just catch the baby when it comes out!"
"Uggh! I don't wanna see her thingies!"
"When I'm not around! You'll have to take care of stuff like that! Just do it!"
"Okay! Here goes..." First Aid stood in front of Carly waiting to deliver the baby. Ultra Magnus, Ironhide, Kup, Springer and Blurr came in.
"Wheresthebabywheresthebaby? AmItoolatetoolatetoolate? NoIcantbebecauseIcandothingsfasterthaneverybody!" said Blurr.
"This reminds me of the time on..."
"Save your stories till later Kup! The baby can't hear ya!"
"And what do you know? You stole Chromia from me!"
"Alright break it up old timers! You're gonna miss it!" said Springer, stepping in between Ironhide and Kup.
"Here it comes... ugh god!" said First Aid. The baby came out and landed in a towel First Aid was holding.
"Congratulations! It's a boy!" said Ratchet.
"What shall we call him Spike?"
"How about... Daniel?" First Aid passed Daniel to Spike who held him for a while. Hot Rod and Arcee came in holding each other's hand.
"Are we too late?" asked Hot Rod.
"Late again lad! HA! See Ironhide? I told you he'd be late!"
"Can I see the baby Spike?" asked Hot Rod. Spike passed Daniel to Hot Rod. "Aww... isn't he cute?" Daniel grinned babyishly at Hot Rod. "You think you're my little brother huh? Yes you are! Hey Magnus! You wanna hold the baby?"
"I can't deal with that now! You can pass Daniel back to Carly now."
For Spike and Carly, the past 9 months had been a very special. They were now married, and also parents of a Young boy named Daniel.
2004 JRisindahouse Fan Fiction
With Special thanks to Exulted_Unicron of Seibertron