A/N Hey, sorry for the long lag between updates, but I have been unwell.
There are few things that make you want to write less than being 8 months
pregnant in 98-degree weather and still suffering from morning sickness.
Though it actually makes me feel better to torture Estel. But anyway, here
is a nice long post to keep you entertained until I finish the next
section.
Thanks to everyone that reviewed. I am still looking for a good name for their daughter if anyone has any suggestions. I have one possible name from a reader, but I would like more.
Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me.
ESTEL/ESTELLE
Estel lightly hugged his pillow to his chest as he sat up in bed to watch the sunrise. The dawn was hazy with promise of hot muggy day. The storm had raged until the wee hours of the morning and had contributed to Estel's wakeful condition. He had grown to hate storms over his time in Rivendell. He always associated them with his Elrond's anger.
Estel felt his stomach growl and curled more tightly around it. He had been up sick half of the night, but had started to feel better over the last few hours. Now he was hungry and needed to eat while he could. But he didn't feel like getting out of bed. Instead he hugged the pillow more tightly to him and continued to watch the sky. He was exhausted and wanted to lie down and sleep, but his back hurt too much. He had been forced to spend the entire night either on his back or on his right side. The bruise and cut on the left side of his face pained him too much to put pressure on. He rubbed at his cheek just below his eye to feel where Thranduil had smacked him last night. He hadn't looked at it in a few hours, but he knew it had turned purple and darkened into an ugly bruise.
He tried not to think about the bruise because if he though about the bruise he would be forced to think about what a fool he had made of himself last night. Estel groaned both in embarrassment and discomfort as his stomach gave another rubble. He needed to get something to eat soon or he would start to feel sick again. Not liking that idea, Estel crawled out of bed quickly steadying himself on the side table. Lack of food had made him lightheaded.
Once the room quite spinning, Estel stole down to the kitchen without even changing out of his sleeping clothes. It was just barely past dawn and he assumed no one would be up and moving yet this morning. After the late night that was had last night, he doubted even the servants would be about yet.
Estel stopped at the threshold of the kitchen. When he had been very young and just come to Rivendell, he had learned that Lord Elrond did not like anyone in the kitchen between mealtimes. Especially a dirty four year old. Estel remembered the Elf Lord's displeasure, even to this day sixteen years later. Plus he was worried about going into the very birthplace of food odors. A fearful thought of the rabbit still being present in the kitchen nearly sent him running back for his room, but then his stomach gave another insistent rumble followed by a light wave of nausea. He stood for a few moments longer in total indecision.
Finally he moved forward to the door and pressed his forehead against it. He knew he needed to go in there and find some food, but he could already smell the leftovers from last night's feast. He almost whimpered at the idea of having to face the smell of rabbit mixed with the pine scented cleaner the elves used to keep the kitchen clean. But before he could make a final decision as to what to do, the door he was leaning against was quickly forced open smacking him in the face and almost knocking him down.
"Ow." Estel yelped as he grabbed his nose. He could not yet tell if it was bleeding, but the door had hit hard enough to make his cheek start throbbing even worse.
"Estel, I am so sorry. Are you alright?" The head of the kitchen staff, and the fattest elf in Imladris said. He had not known the young human was on the other side of the door. He could not imagine why anyone but him would be up at this hour, much less the young one who seemed to spend so much of his time sleeping.
"I'm ok." Estel's muffled reply came from behind his hands. He had not moved them from his nose and cheek yet.
"Mercy, Estel, what are you doing up at this hour?" And why are you hiding behind doors?" The elf took a good look at the Ranger and noticed the large ugly bruise on his left cheek. It was so swollen that the human's eye was nearly forced shut by it. "Gracious, I didn't do that did I?" He reached out to touch the damaged area.
"No." Estel jerked away not wanting anyone to touch his face. Now that he was standing and talking the movement made his whole face hurt. "You did nothing more than bump me in the nose." Estel tried to smile, but it came out more like a grimace because his face hurt so much.
"Fair enough. But that doesn't explain why you are up so early."
"I was hungry." Estel suddenly felt very self-conscious. If there was one thing Elrond didn't like even more than going into the kitchen between meal times, it was bothering his staff between meal times.
"Well come in and let me fix you something. You need to eat, you are skin and bones." The elf began to lead the human back towards the kitchen when Estel stopped again at the threshold. "What is it?"
"It's just." Estel didn't know what to say to not insult the elf. But, he knew the smell would make him ill if he got any closer.
"It's just what?"
Estel thought he would try another excuse. "Ada always said we weren't allowed in the kitchen between meals."
"Oh, that is an old rule that I asked him to put in place to protect me from his twin hellions many years ago. Those two would come running into the kitchen with frogs and snakes wanting to put their grubby hands on the fine dishes. I threatened to quit unless the Lord did something about it." The portly elf chuckled.
Estel still refused to move. He had no choice now but to tell the truth. "It's just the smell."
"What smell?"
"It's nothing bad." Estel quickly said trying to spare the elf's feelings. "But with my nose, even good smell make me feel sick." Estel added with shame.
"Oh, I see. Well what would you like, I shall bring it out to you?"
"You don't have to do that." Estel felt guilty, but grateful none the less.
"Never you mind about that, young one. You need to eat and keep your strength up for that little one of yours." Estel was used to people telling him he needed to eat. Even he could tell that he had lost a tremendous amount of weight, but he felt his eyes open in shock as he realized what the chef had just said.
"How did you know?"
Again the large elf chuckled. "It doesn't take a seer, Estel. I have been around long enough to know the signs of a woman when she is with child. And besides, even though you try to hide it with baggy clothes, you can still see your belly." The elf gently reached down and touched Estel's stomach, resting his hand for a moment on the bulge just under his ribcage. "Now what did you want to eat?"
"Crackers" Estel squeaked, too shocked to say anything else.
"I think we are out, but I will see what I can find." With that the elf left for the kitchen and Estel sank into a chair holding his tummy. He hadn't realized that anyone could tell he was pregnant yet. And now they could. He dropped his head onto the table. He was not ready for this.
A short time later the elf returned with a plate full of cookies, each with a dollop of peanut butter and a banana slice on it, and a glass of milk. "Here you go, Estel. I guess I have to bake more crackers and waybread today."
Estel smiled at the yummy looking cookies. For some reason whenever he did feel like eating, all he wanted was peanut butter or potatoes. The chef must have noticed this. "Thank you so much." Estel could feel tears come to his eyes.
"Now hurry off, Estel. My staff will be here soon to start breakfast. And I don't want your no good brothers to see that I let you eat between meals or they will forever be hounding me for snacks again." Estel rose to leave, but when he reached the door, he turned at the sound of the chef's voice again. "Estel, if you are ever hungry at anytime, feel free to come in the kitchen or ask someone to get you something. We all want you and your baby to be healthy and we promise not to tell your father." The elf winked as he turned back into the kitchen.
Estel made his way to the terrace he sat on last night. It was in the farthest western wing of the house between Elrond's study and his chambers. It was usually very quiet, but more importantly, it was the farthest away from the kitchen and its smells. He rounded the corner lost in thought and was startled nearly to the point of dropping his food by the Lord of Imladris. Estel had not expected to see anyone, especially his father. He hoped he wouldn't get in trouble for snacking in between meals.
"Good morning, Estel. I thought you were going to sleep in this morning?" The elflord raised an elegant eyebrow.
"I was, but I couldn't sleep. I got hungry." Estel noticed that the lord was still in his robes from last night. He stood uncertainly by the entrance. He didn't want to disturb his father, but he didn't want to go back to his room either. He refused to bring any food other than crackers into his room for fear the scent would linger. He shuffled his bare feet with indecision.
"Would you like to join me?" Elrond looked at his child. In truth, in the young Ranger looked exhausted and ill in the pale morning light. He had dark circles under his eyes and the left side of his face was black and blue from Thranduil's slap.
Estel attempted to smile before he remembered that it hurt. He ended up with more of a lopsided grimace. But he sat down on a bench and tucked his legs under him taking a sip of milk. He then took a cookie and pealed off the banana eating it. Then he licked the peanut butter off, finally discarding the cookie.
Elrond watched with a smile on is face. He would never understand why Estel had to dismantle food before he could eat it. No matter what it was, he would inevitably pull at least some of it apart into its component pieces and eat the pieces separately. It was just one of the quirky little quirks that he had come to love about his son.
Estel finally seemed to notice the scrutiny and looked up. "Do you want one, Ada?" Elrond sat down beside his son and took one of the cookies. He had to admit the combination was quite good.
"Did you make these yourself?"
"No, the chef made them for me. I didn't ask him, honest. I wouldn't have gone to the kitchen before breakfast except I was so hungry I was starting to feel sick. I promise, I won't do it again." Estel had stopped eating and looked at his father. He felt slightly afraid and he had no idea where it had come from. He knew Elrond would never hurt him.
Elrond seemed to sense the fear and smiled at his son. "That is alright, Estel. I do not mind you eating between meals. I want you to eat whenever you are hungry. You are far too skinny for you own good."
Estel finally ate a cookie and grimaced in pain as the pressure of biting into the cookie shot pain all the way up to his temple. His cheek throbbed mercilessly.
"Does you face pain you that much?" Elrond looked on with concern at his son. He lightly ran his hand across Estel's cheek and his healing sense already told him there was a small break in Estel's cheekbone. He cursed Thranduil to the deepest pit's of Morgoth.
"It's a little sore I guess." Estel tried to calm his breathing. The last thing he wanted to do was start another fight between the elf lord and the elf king.
"Why don't you stick to the softer foods on the plate and when you are done eating I will look at your cheek?"
"Ok."
"Then, you go back to bed for the rest of the morning." At the mention of bed, Estel couldn't stop himself from yawning. Elrond smiled and took one of the discarded cookies. Though his anger had been great over what had transpired last night, in the morning light maybe things weren't so bad after all.
Two weeks later Elrond sat at the table nervously looking at Thranduil. The elf king had a sour look on his fair face as he tapped his fingers on the table. Breakfast should have been served ten minutes ago, but they were all waiting for Estel too appear. This was the third time in the last two weeks that the young Ranger had been late for breakfast. Elrond didn't blame him, he still needed a great deal of sleep and often felt unwell in the mornings. The others generally had no problems waiting for him, but Thranduil was a different story. Elrond could sympathize, Thranduil was a king and therefore used to having his own way. It must be annoying to be forced to live in someone else's house where they give the orders, especially a half elf.
Thranduil had stated plainly that he was staying until the birth. The arrogant woodelf hadn't even waited for an invitation. He had just proclaimed it. Well, Elrond would not be the rude one and kick him out no matter how much he may have wanted to. The king said that it was imperative that he remain to see that all the proper procedures were safeguarded if this child was to be accepted into the royal house of Mirkwood. What procedures Elrond had no idea, given normal Mirkwood customs he probably wanted Estel to give birth squatting in a field, bathed in deer's blood, biting on a old discarded bow. Then they would dance around a bonfire wearing pieces of the afterbirth.
Elrond's musings were interrupted by the choked sounds of Glorfindel trying to stifle his laughs. He should have known that the blonde would be eavesdropping on his thoughts. The two had been friends for so long they shared a very strong psychic bond, stronger in fact, than the one Elrond had with his children.
Elrond looked at his best friend and felt himself start to chuckle. He knew he had to leave before he dissolved into a very unsightly laughing fit. "I think I will go see what is keeping Estel. Elladan, order breakfast to be served." Elrond gasped out as he all but ran from the room.
However, not before he heard Glorfindel yell. "And I will go see if I can find an old bow no one is using." Both elves could no longer fight the laughter and the halls echoed with it.
"Those two will never change." Thranduil groused. In truth he envied the close friendship Elrond and the blonde had. He had no such friends. He had to admit that he was very happy that Legolas had found a friend to be that close with, he only wished it were not Estel. He had feared for many years that his son would forever be lonely because he was very shy, but he now seemed to be very happy around the twins and the human.
Speaking of his son, Thranduil spared a look at Legolas. He was perfectly dressed and seated, but looked very dark and worried. He also looked like he wanted to say something, but stopped himself. Thranduil leaned over and questioned him. "Why are you frowning so, my little Greenleaf?"
"Estel is unwell. I can feel it."
"Do not worry, from what I have seen, he is always unwell." Thranduil placed a hand on his son's leg. Legolas gave him a small smile. Before anything could be said the four remaining at the table heard another burst of laughter from Elrond and Glorfindel. "Will those two never grow up?" Thranduil rolled his eyes good naturedly trying to cheer his son.
"What do you mean?" One of the twins asked him. Thranduil didn't know which one, he could never keep them straight.
"For as long as I have known your father and the Barlog-slayer, they have acted like elflings." All eyes at the table were now fixed on him. All of the younger elves were shocked to hear someone say something like that about the powerful Lord Elrond and the Great Lord Glorfindel. But they were also very curious because few ever told stories about what the two were like in earlier years. So Thranduil launched into a story about the first time he ever met the two.
Upstairs, Elrond knocked on Estel's door, his keen elvin hearing already picking up the sounds of one being ill from inside. He pushed to door open and went to his child. Estel knelt on the floor in front of the privy vomiting and trying to hold his freshly washed, but completely unbound, hair. Elrond gathered the wet strands in his hand and spoke soothingly to his child. He noticed that Estel only had on is breeches and shirt, everything else was still sitting on the side of the chase lounge in his bathing room. The lounge had been moved into Estel's bathing rooms so that he would have somewhere more comfortable than the floor to lie on when he felt ill.
When Estel was finished, he sat back on his heels and looked up at his father. "Am I late for breakfast again?" He hadn't meant to be late. He knew how angry it made Thranduil and he was trying everything he could to make the king like him better. He rose quickly, looking around for the rest of his clothes. However, the room began to spin and he stumbled. Elrond steadied him before leading him over to the chase lounge.
"Yes, you are late but it is of little matter. Are you feeling better?" Elrond smiled kindly at his child, while tucking a lock of hair behind Estel's ear.
"I guess." Estel tried to reach for his outer tunic, which was located behind Elrond. The elf simply raised an inquisitive eyebrow at the Ranger.
"Really?" Elrond held the tunic out of reach.
"Ok, not really." Estel hung his head and rubbed his hand up and down on his belly.
"Then I want you to go back to bed for a few more hours." Elrond helped Estel stand and led him back to the bed.
"But."
"But what, Estel? You are ill and need to rest." He pulled the covers back so Estel could slip back under them. "Now, try and rest. I will have some tea sent up for you in a bit. I want you to drink all of it. The tea does no good for you if you only drink a few sips." The elf lord smiled again at his child. To his eyes Estel looked so young and vulnerable, not nearly old enough to be a parent himself. He remembered when Estel had been very young and would not go to bed until Elrond told him a story. He missed that cuddly little boy. He bore little resemblance to the thin, unhappy woman who looked at him now. "And if you are very good and are able to eat something later, I will come and entertain you with tales later."
Estel's eyes lit up. It had been a long time since Elrond had told him stories. It had been a long time since he and his father had spent any time alone together unless he was too ill to move and needed Elrond to take care of him. He knew conceptually that Elrond was not angry with him for getting pregnant, but in his heart he still feared that his father was disappointed with him. "That would be wonderful, Ada. Thank you."
Elrond smoothed Estel's hair back and kissed him on the forehead. "Now, get some rest." Elrond closed the door behind him.
It wasn't much past the time that Elrond closed the door that Estel was fast asleep. He hated being so tired all of the time. He tended to sleep between ten to twelve hours a day as opposed to the elves, who only slept two to three. But it was still better than his first few months of pregnancy where he slept around fifteen hours a day.
Estel spent much of the morning in bed before Elrond would allow him to get up. By lunch he felt much better, and even went to the table to eat with everyone else. Thranduil was completely disgusted in Estel's choice of lunches. The young Ranger chose to eat a peanut butter and cheddar cheese sandwich. Elrohir decided that he would try a bite of it because he was convinced that there was no way it was edible. It tasted so bad that the twin was unable to swallow it. But Estel seemed to enjoy it, which was good enough for the family.
By dinnertime, Estel was not hungry but decided to go anyway. He just played with the fish and side dished on his plate until his father turned to him. "Is there something wrong with your dinner?"
"No, sir." Estel yelped. He hadn't realized anyone was paying attention to him.
"Are you feeling sick again, love?" Legolas asked from across the table.
"No, not really. I just don't feel like eating this." Estel pushed a piece of fish across his plate.
"What do you feel like eating? We can have the cooks prepare it." Elrond asked. He had learned that trying to force Estel to eat something he didn't want would only result in the young human being ill later.
"I don't know. The idea of eating anything is just blechk." Estel stuck his tongue out for emphases. "I guess maybe I should just go to bed." He looked to his father for permission to leave the table.
"Oh Estel, don't leave yet. I had the chef's make chocolate ice cream for you." Legolas said.
"Ice cream, really?" Legolas shook his head yes in response to Estel's question.
"If you would eat that, I will have the chef's bring it immediately." Said Elrond from the head of the table.
"Yes, that sounds wonderful." Estel could just imagine the sweet, sweet ice cream.
Soon the servants set a bowl of it in front of the young human, and he spooned some into his mouth. It was just as good as he thought it would be. He enjoyed it thoroughly. But before he could enjoy anymore of it, Thranduil spoke up.
"Elrond, I cannot believe that you are spoiling it, by letting it eat whatever it wants when ever it wants. Have you no sense of discipline in this house? It will end up as big as a horse if you let it keep eating like this. Why not make it eat food that is good for it and its child?" Thranduil could not believe the way they spoiled the Ranger. Letting him have dessert before he even ate more than a bite of his dinner. It was ridiculous.
Elrond grit his teeth so that he didn't yell at the king. He hated the way Thranduil refused to refer to Estel by his name. The woodelf always called Estel "it." But worse than that, was that Estel had put his spoon down and pushed his bowl away from him. Elrond could see tears glistening in the silver eyes.
"I'm sorry."
"Well you should be. You are a spoiled brat. Legolas learned to eat what was put in front of him whether he liked it or not. Obviously Elrond did not teach that lesson to his children." Thranduil snapped at Estel. Estel just hung his head and looked at his hands.
After a while, Estel turned to Elrond. "Ada, may I be excused?" He felt like he was about to start crying and he wanted to leave first.
"Do you not want to finish your ice cream?" Elrond hoped he could coax his child into eating a bit more. But Estel just shook his head "no." "Ok, then you may go."
Estel made to leave the table when Thranduil again spoke up. "NO, my son had the cooks make this for you especially and you skipped your dinner for it, so now you should eat it." Thranduil thrust the bowl of melting ice cream back at the Ranger. "Eat it."
"I'm not really hungry any more." Estel avoided looking at the food. Everyone else at the table recognized the look on Estel's face. They all had learned that meant the Ranger was feeling sick and not to push him to eat.
"I didn't ask if you were hungry, I said to eat it." Thranduil handed the spoon to Estel and glared. Estel wanted to make the king happy, but he knew he couldn't hold it down if he ate it, especially the whole bowl.
"Estel, you don't have to eat any of it if you feel ill." Elrond said. He was at the end of his patience with the king was barely holding on to his politeness. He was just glad Glorfindel had chose to eat dinner with the guard rather than the family.
Estel could see the two powerful elves lock eyes with each other and new that a fight would breakout soon if he didn't do something. So he picked up the bowl and began to spoon the ice cream into his mouth. It now tasted like clay to him. It was hard to force it past the lump in his throat, but he knew he had to or there would be trouble.
He made it half way through the bowl before he could feel it trying to come back up. He managed to swallow it back down and turned to his father again. "Ada, can I be excused?"
"Of course. I will come check on you later." Elrond could not miss the way his child kept licking his lips and swallowing. But at least Thranduil looked somewhat appeased.
Estel barely made it to his washroom before he was violently ill. It was still cold when it came back up. He was so lost in his misery he didn't even look to see who it was that had come in and started rubbing soothing circles on his back. But he could tell that their touch both relaxed and strengthened him.
When he was finally finished the person handed him a glass of mint water to rinse his mouth out, and even helped to steady the glass in Estel's shaking hands. Estel then felt himself enveloped in strong arms and pulled back against a warm chest. They wiped away his tears and hummed softly to him. It was then finally realized it was Legolas that had come to help him. The blond elf stroked Estel's hair back from his face and placed a few gentle kisses on his brow.
"I don't think I like chocolate ice cream anymore." Estel said shakily.
"I don't suppose that you would." Legolas smiled.
"Isn't your father going to be angry with you for leaving the table?" Estel was starting to feel sleepy.
"He doesn't know that I left. Elrond asked to have a word with him and the two left the room. I suspect they didn't want us to see them arguing." Legolas could feel Estel relaxing against him.
"I think I need to go to bed." Estel tried to find the energy to get up, but it just wasn't there. Legolas seemed to sense this and just lifted Estel up and carried him to bed. It worried him greatly how light his friend felt. Estel was nearly asleep by the time Legolas had gotten him changed into his pajamas, so Legolas gave him one final kiss on the forehead and drew the shade before leaving the human to sleep through the night.
Down the hall in Elrond's study things were not so peaceful. Elrond had requested that Thranduil join him here immediately after Estel had left the table. He needed to find a way to make the king understand that he was not going to be allowed to treat Estel that way. In the back of his mind he remembered that he should try and be politic about it, but his paternal protectiveness was getting the best of him.
Once the door was closed Elrond turned to Thranduil. "Don't you ever talk to Estel like that again."
'I am not suppose to tell him my opinion?"
"Not when it involves his eating habits." Elrond took a deep breath hoping to calm himself. "Thranduil, Estel has been hyperemetic since the very beginning of his pregnancy. It is imperative that we let him eat whatever he wants when ever he wants just so that he can have enough energy to survive and keep the pregnancy viable."
"We are not all healers, speak plainly." Thranduil was annoyed that Elrond was using medical terms that he didn't understand. His father had not found it important that he learn the healing arts. Apparently, at least one of the many elves that had acted as Elrond's guardian when he was young, had different ideas.
"It means, that he has been very ill since around the fifth week of his pregnancy. Some days, he vomits so much that he cannot hold down water and is too ill to get out of bed. For months now it has been a struggle to get him to eat at all, much less two meals in one day. It doesn't matter what he eats, just that he eats. I would much prefer that he ate fish and chicken and vegetables every meal that it was served, but he cannot. I will be happy with him eating peanut butter and cookies if that is what he is able to hold down. If he does not eat or is not able to hold down enough food, there is a very real possibility that he could loose the baby, even now."
"Really." Thranduil found this all to be very interesting. Maybe he could take care of this situation after all.
"Please, just promise me that you will leave him alone when it comes to what, when, and how much of something that he chooses to eat."
"Very well, Half elf." Thranduil turned and left in a flurry of robes. He had much work to do.
Three weeks later Estel relaxed in the sun under a large tree. On his lap he held a large tome about the history of Mirkwood. Two weeks ago he had gone the Thranduil and asked to be tutored in the history of the Woodland realm. He knew that the king was very knowledgeable on the subject, so he decided to take a chance. Thranduil had agreed to teach him and so they had lessons in the morning and then Estel read for the next day in the afternoon. He was at least three lessons ahead in reading, but it was of little consequence because he found it interesting.
So engrossed in his reading was Estel, that he did not notice the elf watching him. Legolas stood in he shadows looking at the Ranger. The two had barely spoken at all since Thranduil arrived five weeks ago and he missed his best friend. Thranduil was with Elrond discussing matters that Legolas wanted nothing to do with so now was his chance to snatch some time with Estel.
Decision made, Legolas stalked up soundlessly through the trees until he was a few feet above the human. Then he dropped down beside him. Estel barely seemed startled.
"Hello."
"Hi, what are you reading?" Legolas tried to see over Estel's shoulder from his seat directly beside the human.
"A history of the early days of Mirkwood. Very interesting." Estel tried to hide his smile. He knew Legolas would not be ignored for a "stuffy old book" as he called them.
"Why do you want to read that when the day is so beautiful? You should be out enjoying it."
"I am out enjoying it. Besides, your father told me to read it."
"Sitting under a tree reading a book is not enjoying the day. You should be out on the fields practicing archery or swords." Legolas tried to take the book from Estel. Estel just turned slightly so the book was out of Legolas's reach.
"If you haven't noticed, my friend, I am not in any shape to practice swords." Estel touched his stomach. "Nor do I feel like being laughed at by the Mirkwood guard who have taken up residence on our archery fields." Estel flipped the page even though he hadn't actually read it. 'I think I shall just stay here and read for the afternoon."
Legolas was becoming annoyed with Estel's lack of interest in his presence. He flopped his head in Estel's lap fanning his hair out to cover the pages of the book. Estel looked down at him in question. Legolas smiled at the Ranger and Estel finally smiled back. Legolas had almost forgotten how pretty Estel's smile was. After all, it had been over a month since he had seen the young human smile.
Legolas sat up slightly and kissed Estel on the tip of the nose. Estel smiled even brighter and kissed Legolas on the lips. Legolas returned the peck not expecting it to go any further, but to his surprise and great joy, Estel deepened the kiss. Estel's hair fell forward blocking their kiss from view of prying eyes, but Legolas was developing a rather embarrassing bulge in his leggings.
Finally Legolas broke away, sat up, and looked at the Ranger. Estel blushed. "Did I do something wrong?" Estel asked.
"No." Legolas continued to stare at the Estel, his mind racing to try and figure out where they could go to be alone. Then he remembered the small cave not far from there that the two of them had sat out the spring storm. "Take a walk with me."
Estel stood and followed Legolas, grasping the hand the elf held out for him. He led them to a small cave that Estel remembered well. Legolas settled the two of them on the floor, using Estel's cloak as a bed and his for covers. Now it was Estel's turn to stare at him. Legolas reached for him and he melted into the touch. He had been wanting this for weeks now, to the point where it had almost become a physical pain. It wasn't just the sex, but that was nice too, it was Legolas's touch and presence that he longed for.
Each spot Legolas touched was like being submerged in warm water after a cold day. And when Legolas finally entered him he realized that the elf was his sun. That he would freeze to death without Legolas's touch. The sensation was so intense Estel could almost not bear it. The absolute feeling of completeness of having their entire family together in his body was mind blowing.
When they were finished and collapsed as sweaty heaps under Legolas's cloak, the elf tickled Estel's side and he giggled. Legolas then realized that it had literally been months since he had heard his friend laugh, and he sincerely missed the sound. However, it didn't take long for him to settle into a light doze with Estel cuddled against his chest with one leg still thrown over the elf's hips. Legolas soon began to feel wetness on his chest and noticed that Estel was crying.
"What is wrong Estel?" Legolas tried to look into the human's eyes, but Estel refused to meet them.
"Nothing." Estel sniffled.
"Then why are you crying, sweetheart?" Legolas stroked the Ranger's hair back and kissed his forehead.
"It's just that I am happy to see you. I have missed you." Estel snuggled even closer to the elf as he spoke, still craving the skin on skin contact.
"I missed you to, love. I didn't mean to stay away so long. My father has kept me very busy."
"I know, I guess I was just kind of lonely. I thought maybe I had made you mad or something."
"No, I could never be mad at you. I promise not to stay away so long, if you promise to tell me if you are lonely." Legolas looked down and noticed that Estel was finally looking up at him. The answering smile melted Legolas's heart.
When Legolas got back to the house he made a point of talking to Elrond about Estel's mood. The Half elf had also noticed how down his foster child had been lately. Along with Glorfindel the three devised a picnic by the water falls for the next day to try and cheer up the Ranger.
After the decision was made, Glorfindel left to make arrangements, while Elrond surreptitiously made sure the weather was going to be warm and clear the next day. Legolas was left the job of convincing the Ranger to go. It turned out to be much easier than he had expected. As soon as he had mentioned it to Estel, the human had thrown his arms around Legolas's neck and thanked him for setting up the picnic. He decided not to tell Estel that it was actually Elrond's idea.
So in a good mood and very full of himself, Legolas sought out his father to invite him as well. The outing was supposed to be for family, and Thranduil was family, Legolas's anyway. At first his father seemed reluctant, but he was unable to resist the pleading of his only child for long.
Just after breakfast the next day, Estel, Legolas, Elrond, Glorfindel, the twins, and Thranduil set off towards a steam heated swimming pond near one of the smaller waterfalls. It was little more than an hour's hike, but the weather was beautiful and the forest alive so everyone enjoyed it greatly. Even Thranduil was enjoying himself. He realized that he had been away from his beloved trees for too long and now he reveled in their chatter.
When they finally reached the pool it didn't take long before the twins and Legolas were enjoying a good swim. Even Elrond and Glorfindel stripped down and partook of the warm water. Estel just dangled his feet in saying that because he was as big as a whale he would probably displace too much water. Then he kicked water at Elrohir when he mentioned that even Oliphants liked to bathe in pools. But the younger twin ignored the shower of water because he was just so happy to see Estel's eyes shining again with humour.
Thranduil shunned the pool in favour of perching in a tree above it. Being from a completely landlocked nation, he could never understand the half elf's fascination with water. Thranduil, himself, disliked water greatly and rarely went anywhere near it unless it was in a bath or he had no choice.
While he sat above them all in the tree watching, he turned his attention to Estel. The human did look much happier than Thranduil had seen him since his arrival. His spirit shone through his ridiculously pretty silver eyes and his smile made him look annoyingly radiant, for a human anyway. Thranduil could almost understand what his son saw in the little mortal worm. He also noticed that he could detect a faint glow from his granddaughter as well. Her spirit was now strong enough to be seen if he looked closely, even as she was draining her mother's. He realized if he wanted the human to loose the child he would have to do something soon, before his son became too attached to either. He would hate to see his beloved son, the only reason he still remained in Middle Earth, hurt when his lover died. But that is what would happen if he continued to fall in love with this Ranger.
His plan formed he dropped from the tree just in time to be hit by a shower of water from Glorfindel which had been aimed at Elrond. The dark-haired lord had dropped below the water to avoid it though. The Mirkwood king had to admit he had rarely seen anyone move so well in the water as Elrond. He supposed it had something to do with having grown up always around water but he did not know for sure. Given Elrond's convoluted family tree he was probably related to a mermaid somewhere.
But now was not the time to ponder it, now he had to kill a certain golden- haired elf. "What are you trying to do drown me, you moron?"
Elrond surfaced just in time to hear Thranduil yelling and to see Estel cringe beside him at the sound.
"Nay, you just got in the way. If I wanted to drown you I would take you someplace far more secluded than this, where no one would hear you screaming." Glorfindel smiled back sweetly.
Thranduil wished to say more to the obnoxious Vanyar elf, but took one look at the pleading eyes of his son and again caved in. Instead he turned to Lord Elrond. "Why did you bring your guard dog anyway? I thought this was a family affair."
"Glorfindel is family." Elladan spoke up.
"Yeah, I am their grandmother's cousin."
"You, imp of Morgoth, are about as closely related to them as the Ranger over there. Just because they call you uncle does not make you one." Thranduil enjoyed the hurt expression on Estel's face. It was time for the next insult. "Too bad you are not another adoptive father for Elrond. Then at least Middle Earth would be rid of you, since his fathers never seem to last very long. The kiss of death seems to be being called 'ada' by the half elf." Thranduil mentally considered who would yell at him first. He purposely ignored Legolas. He did not want to see the hurt in his elfling's eyes.
"Ada, can we eat? I am getting hungry." Estel interrupted before anyone could yell at Thranduil. He didn't want this day ruined with fighting. Thranduil enjoyed seeing the spirit seem to bleed out of the young human. He again looked tired and sad. Somewhere, Thranduil could not tell from where, he felt a pang of guilt at making Estel stop smiling. He guessed it was like yelling at a dog. But he did have to admit that Elrond's pet human was frighteningly loyal to the elf lord.
Elrond recognized that Estel was trying to defuse the fight. Part of him wanted to tell the rotten king what he thought of him and then throw him bodily from his valley, but he would not lessen Estel's sacrifice. "Of course, my child. We shall serve lunch right now." In truth it was getting close to lunchtime.
Soon everyone was out of the water and seated on a large blanket to eat. The cooks had sent an enormous amount of food, and even a large hunk of meat still on the bone for Glorfindel's dog. Estel sadly picked at the food on his plate, all appetite gone after the incident with Thranduil earlier. He smiled when someone talked to him or joked with him, but the smile never touched his eyes.
Glorfindel noticed the change in the young human and was determined to do something about it. Picking his target well, he waited until he knew Estel was looking at Elladan and then launched a strawberry straight at the elder twin's face. The fruit exploded on impact, leaving a sticky read trail down Elladan's face. Elladan looked over and Glorfindel innocently pointed at Legolas, who was sitting beside him with a plate full of strawberries. In return Elladan picked up a handful of cooked yams and lobbed them at the prince's face, resulting in a direct hit. It didn't take long before the younger elves and Estel were in a full-fledged food fight. Glorfindel sat back and enjoyed the way Estel cheered up from getting to throw carrots at his brothers.
Finally Elrond was able to end the battle, getting quite messy himself in the process, and everyone settled back down to eat. This time Estel actually ate a bite or two of each type of food on his plate. The elflord guessed it was one of the largest meals the Ranger had eaten in months.
After meals were eaten and food washed out of hair and off faces, Elrond and Glorfindel went exploring to find herbs, while Thranduil again climbed a tree to have a higher vantage point. He watched as Estel leaned back against his son as Legolas lightly massaged the human's back. Elladan and Elrohir seemed to be amusing themselves trying to get rocks to skip across the water.
Estel eventually lied down on the blanket with his head pillowed in Legolas's lap. He gently rubbed his hand up and down on his belly. He started to doze off in the warmth of the day and the warmth of the company when Legolas distracted him.
"Are you feeling unwell?"
"No, why, do I look unwell?" Estel cracked his eyes open to look at the elf.
"No. It is just that you keep rubbing your stomach. I thought perhaps you felt ill."
"Oh, I just do that because it feels good." Estel shrugged. He then felt Legolas's hand begin to rub his belly. The elf used a feather light touch that made Estel giggle. "That just tickles." Thranduil wanted to puke at how cute they were.
The king's ponderings were interrupted by the twins. "Legolas, come with us to the top of the waterfall. The view up there is amazing. There was some quiet discussion between his son and Estel before Legolas dropped a kiss on Estel's forehead and left.
Thranduil watched for a while longer as the human dozed in the sun. But soon the human got up and started to collect the dishes to rinse out. He carried them some ways down stream and Thranduil followed. He found it fitting that the human should be the one cleaning up after the elves. Part of him wished it were Glorfindel doing it just so he could see the mighty Lord of the Golden Flower washing dishes. Thranduil dropped down beside the human startling him badly.
"Did I frighten you, young one?" Thranduil purred as he leaned against a tree trunk.
"Yes. I didn't hear you up there." Estel tried to smile at the elf king. Secretly he had hoped that things had gotten better between them as of late.
"Not surprising." The king mumbled to himself, but out loud he said. "Why are you washing dishes? Surely your brothers would help you when they return."
"Oh, I don't mind. Besides, the smell from the food left on them was starting to make me feel queasy." Estel gave a wan smile to Thranduil.
"Well, we wouldn't want that now would we. You must take better care of your self, dear Estel, you are simply skin and bones. What elf would want to cuddle up to someone as thin as you. It would be like hugging a skeleton, with a big bulbous stomach." Thranduil tilted his head thoughtfully. "I take that back, more like a spider. With a round torso and long thin limbs. I suppose that you remind my son of home." Thranduil was rewarded with the Ranger looking down self-consciously at his belly and blushing.
"Oh, do not act so coy. It is obvious that you and my son have lain together; otherwise you would not be in this state. In fact, I believe most of the Mirkwood guard knows that you two lay together. My son has informed them exactly where you like to be touched and what noised you make. Normally I would not put up with him treating a lady in such a manner, but since you are no lady it is of little consequence. I am more angry with my little Greenleaf for not being more careful when he slept with a whore." Estel looked up at the king with hurt eyes. "Do not look at me like that. What type of person would have sex with a man so quickly? Not a someone of virtue, that is the truth." Estel could feel tears rise in his eyes and again dropped them to the forest floor.
Thranduil saw the tears and reveled in them. "A person like you should not be the type to raise a member of an Elvin Royal family. You will raise the child to have weak morals." Only if Thranduil thought about it, Legolas was far more to blame in this situation than Estel. Estel could not help craving the touch of his child's father, it was only natural, but Estel did not know that. "Yes, I think she will be better off in Mirkwood away from you. We will take her their as soon as she is born. I think it best that you do not see her again after that."
"You can't take her from me." Estel felt fear like he had never felt before at the thought of having his daughter taken from him. But he also felt another type of fear that was so strong and so primal it almost took his breath away. It was the type of fear he felt when he was very young child and went to his mother's room to wake her and she would not answer his call. It surrounded him and made him start to shake.
"Oh yes I can. I am a king, and you are a bastard human that Elrond keeps as a pet. The Elders will never agree to let you keep an Elvin child. The only hope you have would be to tell them who you truly are, and that would mean certain death for her and you." Thranduil smiled evilly at the human and Estel felt another wave of fear nearly drown him. Thranduil of course knew that what he said was mostly untrue. The Elders already knew Estel's identity. Moreover, some of the most powerful among them were either related to Elrond or very close friends of the half elf. They would never side against Elrond, who was the most one of the two most powerful (his mother-in-law Galadriel being the other), but again Estel did not know.
"I know what you are thinking, you will talk to Legolas and he will straighten this whole thing out." Estel had not been thinking that, but it was a good idea. "Well, it won't work. Legolas doesn't care about you. You are nothing more than a broodmare to him. You are a way to spend his time before he marries Elrond's daughter Arwen. Think on it a moment, why would he want you, when he could have the most beautiful elf-maid in centuries? He wouldn't. You are a diversion. He only seeks you out when he wants sex. Or, hadn't you noticed." Thranduil closed in for the kill. "Though I doubt he will want you much longer, the way that you look. My guess is that he will turn again to Elladan's bed or one of his friend's from home and you will be left in the cold. Freezing for his touch. But do not worry, from looking at Glorfindel, Elrond takes good care of his pets." Thranduil began to laugh at Estel's distress as the Ranger ran from the glade he was in. He didn't even pick back up the dishes.
Estel ran back towards the path that would take him home as fast as he could. Tears blurred his vision and he tripped more than once, cutting both his hands and knees. When he made it back to the blankets, Elrond and Glorfindel had returned and were chatting quietly. Thranduil leaned against a tree just off to the side. Estel didn't even wipe the tears from his face before he turned to run home.
Elrond called after his child. "Estel, where are you going in such a hurry?"
"Home." Estel gulped trying to still his tears.
"Why? We were not planning to leave until closer to dark."
"I don't feel well. I want to go lie down." Estel sniffled, but tears still poured down his cheeks.
"Well, wait and we will all go. Or I will return with you if you are feeling ill." Elrond rose to accompany his child.
"No. That is not necessary. I just need to go home. You stay here with the others. I'll go alone." Estel's voice broke on the last word and he turned and ran off again before Elrond could protest. Alone was how he would be for the rest of his life according to Thranduil. Estel had been alone a lot when he was a child. He was the youngest person in Imladris by several hundred years. Consequently he had no one to play with and spent a great deal of time alone. He had hoped as he grew older that he would find someone to spend his time with, be they friend or lover and he had found both in Legolas. Legolas had given him a daughter who would drive away his loneliness. But Legolas didn't love him. Legolas would take his daughter away from him. Estel again felt the irrational fear almost swallow him as he ran back towards the house.
Soon he reached the courtyard winded from running and crying. All the way home he kept thinking on what Thranduil had said. That he would never get to see his daughter. The thought was beyond terrible to him and it literally made him sick as he bent down and vomited in the middle of the courtyard. He felt awful. One reason he tended to eat bland foods, was because they were bland when they came back up. Not so with what he had eaten at lunch.
He felt someone supporting him as he wretched and was glad of it because his knees were beginning to shake. He finally looked up at Erestor's worried face. "Oh Estel, are you going to be alright?"
Estel wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. "Yes, I just am not feeling sick right now."
"Obviously." Erestor smiled at the human. "I shall have someone clean this up and summon your father."
"No, that is alright. I just need to go my room and rest for a while. I am sorry I stopped you." Estel allowed Erestor to lead him into the house and towards the stairs which lead to his rooms. Erestor was someone Estel had known almost his whole life, but was not very close to. He knew that Elrond considered the rather shy elf to be a very good friend, but Estel had just never warmed to him the way he had to Glorfindel. When Estel was young, Erestor had taught him political theory and mathematics. He supposed that he always associated the elf with those boring subjects and long unpleasant afternoons being cooped up in a study for far more hours than a young boy should be forced to sit still. Erestor was the consummate civil servant and Estel did not doubt that Imladris would fall apart without him, but he was not as kind as Elrond or as charismatic as Glorfindel. Erestor enjoyed going over accounts more than archery practice and Estel had always found that just plain weird.
However, right now Estel didn't care about any of that as he leaned slightly on Elrond's advisor. "Do not trouble yourself about that Estel. I was just on my way to the stable to see if the groom had counted the bags of feed we had left to determine how many we would need. I figure that we can see what we don't need and make a tidy profit." Erestor droned on and on about similar veins and Estel remembered why he never sought out this elf's company.
When they finally reached Estel's room, the human rested his head against the door for a moment and Erestor looked on in concern. "Are you sure you will be well?"
"Yes, I will be fine. This happens all the time. I just need to take a nap. Thank you Erestor. And I really am sorry about the courtyard."
"No harm done. You just rest and feel better. I will see you later." Erestor stood outside of the closed door a moment and worried. He had not missed Estel's red rimmed eyes or the way his voice hitched now and then. He did not doubt that the young human felt ill, but there was clearly something else bothering him. He would discuss it with Elrond when he returned.
Thanks to everyone that reviewed. I am still looking for a good name for their daughter if anyone has any suggestions. I have one possible name from a reader, but I would like more.
Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me.
ESTEL/ESTELLE
Estel lightly hugged his pillow to his chest as he sat up in bed to watch the sunrise. The dawn was hazy with promise of hot muggy day. The storm had raged until the wee hours of the morning and had contributed to Estel's wakeful condition. He had grown to hate storms over his time in Rivendell. He always associated them with his Elrond's anger.
Estel felt his stomach growl and curled more tightly around it. He had been up sick half of the night, but had started to feel better over the last few hours. Now he was hungry and needed to eat while he could. But he didn't feel like getting out of bed. Instead he hugged the pillow more tightly to him and continued to watch the sky. He was exhausted and wanted to lie down and sleep, but his back hurt too much. He had been forced to spend the entire night either on his back or on his right side. The bruise and cut on the left side of his face pained him too much to put pressure on. He rubbed at his cheek just below his eye to feel where Thranduil had smacked him last night. He hadn't looked at it in a few hours, but he knew it had turned purple and darkened into an ugly bruise.
He tried not to think about the bruise because if he though about the bruise he would be forced to think about what a fool he had made of himself last night. Estel groaned both in embarrassment and discomfort as his stomach gave another rubble. He needed to get something to eat soon or he would start to feel sick again. Not liking that idea, Estel crawled out of bed quickly steadying himself on the side table. Lack of food had made him lightheaded.
Once the room quite spinning, Estel stole down to the kitchen without even changing out of his sleeping clothes. It was just barely past dawn and he assumed no one would be up and moving yet this morning. After the late night that was had last night, he doubted even the servants would be about yet.
Estel stopped at the threshold of the kitchen. When he had been very young and just come to Rivendell, he had learned that Lord Elrond did not like anyone in the kitchen between mealtimes. Especially a dirty four year old. Estel remembered the Elf Lord's displeasure, even to this day sixteen years later. Plus he was worried about going into the very birthplace of food odors. A fearful thought of the rabbit still being present in the kitchen nearly sent him running back for his room, but then his stomach gave another insistent rumble followed by a light wave of nausea. He stood for a few moments longer in total indecision.
Finally he moved forward to the door and pressed his forehead against it. He knew he needed to go in there and find some food, but he could already smell the leftovers from last night's feast. He almost whimpered at the idea of having to face the smell of rabbit mixed with the pine scented cleaner the elves used to keep the kitchen clean. But before he could make a final decision as to what to do, the door he was leaning against was quickly forced open smacking him in the face and almost knocking him down.
"Ow." Estel yelped as he grabbed his nose. He could not yet tell if it was bleeding, but the door had hit hard enough to make his cheek start throbbing even worse.
"Estel, I am so sorry. Are you alright?" The head of the kitchen staff, and the fattest elf in Imladris said. He had not known the young human was on the other side of the door. He could not imagine why anyone but him would be up at this hour, much less the young one who seemed to spend so much of his time sleeping.
"I'm ok." Estel's muffled reply came from behind his hands. He had not moved them from his nose and cheek yet.
"Mercy, Estel, what are you doing up at this hour?" And why are you hiding behind doors?" The elf took a good look at the Ranger and noticed the large ugly bruise on his left cheek. It was so swollen that the human's eye was nearly forced shut by it. "Gracious, I didn't do that did I?" He reached out to touch the damaged area.
"No." Estel jerked away not wanting anyone to touch his face. Now that he was standing and talking the movement made his whole face hurt. "You did nothing more than bump me in the nose." Estel tried to smile, but it came out more like a grimace because his face hurt so much.
"Fair enough. But that doesn't explain why you are up so early."
"I was hungry." Estel suddenly felt very self-conscious. If there was one thing Elrond didn't like even more than going into the kitchen between meal times, it was bothering his staff between meal times.
"Well come in and let me fix you something. You need to eat, you are skin and bones." The elf began to lead the human back towards the kitchen when Estel stopped again at the threshold. "What is it?"
"It's just." Estel didn't know what to say to not insult the elf. But, he knew the smell would make him ill if he got any closer.
"It's just what?"
Estel thought he would try another excuse. "Ada always said we weren't allowed in the kitchen between meals."
"Oh, that is an old rule that I asked him to put in place to protect me from his twin hellions many years ago. Those two would come running into the kitchen with frogs and snakes wanting to put their grubby hands on the fine dishes. I threatened to quit unless the Lord did something about it." The portly elf chuckled.
Estel still refused to move. He had no choice now but to tell the truth. "It's just the smell."
"What smell?"
"It's nothing bad." Estel quickly said trying to spare the elf's feelings. "But with my nose, even good smell make me feel sick." Estel added with shame.
"Oh, I see. Well what would you like, I shall bring it out to you?"
"You don't have to do that." Estel felt guilty, but grateful none the less.
"Never you mind about that, young one. You need to eat and keep your strength up for that little one of yours." Estel was used to people telling him he needed to eat. Even he could tell that he had lost a tremendous amount of weight, but he felt his eyes open in shock as he realized what the chef had just said.
"How did you know?"
Again the large elf chuckled. "It doesn't take a seer, Estel. I have been around long enough to know the signs of a woman when she is with child. And besides, even though you try to hide it with baggy clothes, you can still see your belly." The elf gently reached down and touched Estel's stomach, resting his hand for a moment on the bulge just under his ribcage. "Now what did you want to eat?"
"Crackers" Estel squeaked, too shocked to say anything else.
"I think we are out, but I will see what I can find." With that the elf left for the kitchen and Estel sank into a chair holding his tummy. He hadn't realized that anyone could tell he was pregnant yet. And now they could. He dropped his head onto the table. He was not ready for this.
A short time later the elf returned with a plate full of cookies, each with a dollop of peanut butter and a banana slice on it, and a glass of milk. "Here you go, Estel. I guess I have to bake more crackers and waybread today."
Estel smiled at the yummy looking cookies. For some reason whenever he did feel like eating, all he wanted was peanut butter or potatoes. The chef must have noticed this. "Thank you so much." Estel could feel tears come to his eyes.
"Now hurry off, Estel. My staff will be here soon to start breakfast. And I don't want your no good brothers to see that I let you eat between meals or they will forever be hounding me for snacks again." Estel rose to leave, but when he reached the door, he turned at the sound of the chef's voice again. "Estel, if you are ever hungry at anytime, feel free to come in the kitchen or ask someone to get you something. We all want you and your baby to be healthy and we promise not to tell your father." The elf winked as he turned back into the kitchen.
Estel made his way to the terrace he sat on last night. It was in the farthest western wing of the house between Elrond's study and his chambers. It was usually very quiet, but more importantly, it was the farthest away from the kitchen and its smells. He rounded the corner lost in thought and was startled nearly to the point of dropping his food by the Lord of Imladris. Estel had not expected to see anyone, especially his father. He hoped he wouldn't get in trouble for snacking in between meals.
"Good morning, Estel. I thought you were going to sleep in this morning?" The elflord raised an elegant eyebrow.
"I was, but I couldn't sleep. I got hungry." Estel noticed that the lord was still in his robes from last night. He stood uncertainly by the entrance. He didn't want to disturb his father, but he didn't want to go back to his room either. He refused to bring any food other than crackers into his room for fear the scent would linger. He shuffled his bare feet with indecision.
"Would you like to join me?" Elrond looked at his child. In truth, in the young Ranger looked exhausted and ill in the pale morning light. He had dark circles under his eyes and the left side of his face was black and blue from Thranduil's slap.
Estel attempted to smile before he remembered that it hurt. He ended up with more of a lopsided grimace. But he sat down on a bench and tucked his legs under him taking a sip of milk. He then took a cookie and pealed off the banana eating it. Then he licked the peanut butter off, finally discarding the cookie.
Elrond watched with a smile on is face. He would never understand why Estel had to dismantle food before he could eat it. No matter what it was, he would inevitably pull at least some of it apart into its component pieces and eat the pieces separately. It was just one of the quirky little quirks that he had come to love about his son.
Estel finally seemed to notice the scrutiny and looked up. "Do you want one, Ada?" Elrond sat down beside his son and took one of the cookies. He had to admit the combination was quite good.
"Did you make these yourself?"
"No, the chef made them for me. I didn't ask him, honest. I wouldn't have gone to the kitchen before breakfast except I was so hungry I was starting to feel sick. I promise, I won't do it again." Estel had stopped eating and looked at his father. He felt slightly afraid and he had no idea where it had come from. He knew Elrond would never hurt him.
Elrond seemed to sense the fear and smiled at his son. "That is alright, Estel. I do not mind you eating between meals. I want you to eat whenever you are hungry. You are far too skinny for you own good."
Estel finally ate a cookie and grimaced in pain as the pressure of biting into the cookie shot pain all the way up to his temple. His cheek throbbed mercilessly.
"Does you face pain you that much?" Elrond looked on with concern at his son. He lightly ran his hand across Estel's cheek and his healing sense already told him there was a small break in Estel's cheekbone. He cursed Thranduil to the deepest pit's of Morgoth.
"It's a little sore I guess." Estel tried to calm his breathing. The last thing he wanted to do was start another fight between the elf lord and the elf king.
"Why don't you stick to the softer foods on the plate and when you are done eating I will look at your cheek?"
"Ok."
"Then, you go back to bed for the rest of the morning." At the mention of bed, Estel couldn't stop himself from yawning. Elrond smiled and took one of the discarded cookies. Though his anger had been great over what had transpired last night, in the morning light maybe things weren't so bad after all.
Two weeks later Elrond sat at the table nervously looking at Thranduil. The elf king had a sour look on his fair face as he tapped his fingers on the table. Breakfast should have been served ten minutes ago, but they were all waiting for Estel too appear. This was the third time in the last two weeks that the young Ranger had been late for breakfast. Elrond didn't blame him, he still needed a great deal of sleep and often felt unwell in the mornings. The others generally had no problems waiting for him, but Thranduil was a different story. Elrond could sympathize, Thranduil was a king and therefore used to having his own way. It must be annoying to be forced to live in someone else's house where they give the orders, especially a half elf.
Thranduil had stated plainly that he was staying until the birth. The arrogant woodelf hadn't even waited for an invitation. He had just proclaimed it. Well, Elrond would not be the rude one and kick him out no matter how much he may have wanted to. The king said that it was imperative that he remain to see that all the proper procedures were safeguarded if this child was to be accepted into the royal house of Mirkwood. What procedures Elrond had no idea, given normal Mirkwood customs he probably wanted Estel to give birth squatting in a field, bathed in deer's blood, biting on a old discarded bow. Then they would dance around a bonfire wearing pieces of the afterbirth.
Elrond's musings were interrupted by the choked sounds of Glorfindel trying to stifle his laughs. He should have known that the blonde would be eavesdropping on his thoughts. The two had been friends for so long they shared a very strong psychic bond, stronger in fact, than the one Elrond had with his children.
Elrond looked at his best friend and felt himself start to chuckle. He knew he had to leave before he dissolved into a very unsightly laughing fit. "I think I will go see what is keeping Estel. Elladan, order breakfast to be served." Elrond gasped out as he all but ran from the room.
However, not before he heard Glorfindel yell. "And I will go see if I can find an old bow no one is using." Both elves could no longer fight the laughter and the halls echoed with it.
"Those two will never change." Thranduil groused. In truth he envied the close friendship Elrond and the blonde had. He had no such friends. He had to admit that he was very happy that Legolas had found a friend to be that close with, he only wished it were not Estel. He had feared for many years that his son would forever be lonely because he was very shy, but he now seemed to be very happy around the twins and the human.
Speaking of his son, Thranduil spared a look at Legolas. He was perfectly dressed and seated, but looked very dark and worried. He also looked like he wanted to say something, but stopped himself. Thranduil leaned over and questioned him. "Why are you frowning so, my little Greenleaf?"
"Estel is unwell. I can feel it."
"Do not worry, from what I have seen, he is always unwell." Thranduil placed a hand on his son's leg. Legolas gave him a small smile. Before anything could be said the four remaining at the table heard another burst of laughter from Elrond and Glorfindel. "Will those two never grow up?" Thranduil rolled his eyes good naturedly trying to cheer his son.
"What do you mean?" One of the twins asked him. Thranduil didn't know which one, he could never keep them straight.
"For as long as I have known your father and the Barlog-slayer, they have acted like elflings." All eyes at the table were now fixed on him. All of the younger elves were shocked to hear someone say something like that about the powerful Lord Elrond and the Great Lord Glorfindel. But they were also very curious because few ever told stories about what the two were like in earlier years. So Thranduil launched into a story about the first time he ever met the two.
Upstairs, Elrond knocked on Estel's door, his keen elvin hearing already picking up the sounds of one being ill from inside. He pushed to door open and went to his child. Estel knelt on the floor in front of the privy vomiting and trying to hold his freshly washed, but completely unbound, hair. Elrond gathered the wet strands in his hand and spoke soothingly to his child. He noticed that Estel only had on is breeches and shirt, everything else was still sitting on the side of the chase lounge in his bathing room. The lounge had been moved into Estel's bathing rooms so that he would have somewhere more comfortable than the floor to lie on when he felt ill.
When Estel was finished, he sat back on his heels and looked up at his father. "Am I late for breakfast again?" He hadn't meant to be late. He knew how angry it made Thranduil and he was trying everything he could to make the king like him better. He rose quickly, looking around for the rest of his clothes. However, the room began to spin and he stumbled. Elrond steadied him before leading him over to the chase lounge.
"Yes, you are late but it is of little matter. Are you feeling better?" Elrond smiled kindly at his child, while tucking a lock of hair behind Estel's ear.
"I guess." Estel tried to reach for his outer tunic, which was located behind Elrond. The elf simply raised an inquisitive eyebrow at the Ranger.
"Really?" Elrond held the tunic out of reach.
"Ok, not really." Estel hung his head and rubbed his hand up and down on his belly.
"Then I want you to go back to bed for a few more hours." Elrond helped Estel stand and led him back to the bed.
"But."
"But what, Estel? You are ill and need to rest." He pulled the covers back so Estel could slip back under them. "Now, try and rest. I will have some tea sent up for you in a bit. I want you to drink all of it. The tea does no good for you if you only drink a few sips." The elf lord smiled again at his child. To his eyes Estel looked so young and vulnerable, not nearly old enough to be a parent himself. He remembered when Estel had been very young and would not go to bed until Elrond told him a story. He missed that cuddly little boy. He bore little resemblance to the thin, unhappy woman who looked at him now. "And if you are very good and are able to eat something later, I will come and entertain you with tales later."
Estel's eyes lit up. It had been a long time since Elrond had told him stories. It had been a long time since he and his father had spent any time alone together unless he was too ill to move and needed Elrond to take care of him. He knew conceptually that Elrond was not angry with him for getting pregnant, but in his heart he still feared that his father was disappointed with him. "That would be wonderful, Ada. Thank you."
Elrond smoothed Estel's hair back and kissed him on the forehead. "Now, get some rest." Elrond closed the door behind him.
It wasn't much past the time that Elrond closed the door that Estel was fast asleep. He hated being so tired all of the time. He tended to sleep between ten to twelve hours a day as opposed to the elves, who only slept two to three. But it was still better than his first few months of pregnancy where he slept around fifteen hours a day.
Estel spent much of the morning in bed before Elrond would allow him to get up. By lunch he felt much better, and even went to the table to eat with everyone else. Thranduil was completely disgusted in Estel's choice of lunches. The young Ranger chose to eat a peanut butter and cheddar cheese sandwich. Elrohir decided that he would try a bite of it because he was convinced that there was no way it was edible. It tasted so bad that the twin was unable to swallow it. But Estel seemed to enjoy it, which was good enough for the family.
By dinnertime, Estel was not hungry but decided to go anyway. He just played with the fish and side dished on his plate until his father turned to him. "Is there something wrong with your dinner?"
"No, sir." Estel yelped. He hadn't realized anyone was paying attention to him.
"Are you feeling sick again, love?" Legolas asked from across the table.
"No, not really. I just don't feel like eating this." Estel pushed a piece of fish across his plate.
"What do you feel like eating? We can have the cooks prepare it." Elrond asked. He had learned that trying to force Estel to eat something he didn't want would only result in the young human being ill later.
"I don't know. The idea of eating anything is just blechk." Estel stuck his tongue out for emphases. "I guess maybe I should just go to bed." He looked to his father for permission to leave the table.
"Oh Estel, don't leave yet. I had the chef's make chocolate ice cream for you." Legolas said.
"Ice cream, really?" Legolas shook his head yes in response to Estel's question.
"If you would eat that, I will have the chef's bring it immediately." Said Elrond from the head of the table.
"Yes, that sounds wonderful." Estel could just imagine the sweet, sweet ice cream.
Soon the servants set a bowl of it in front of the young human, and he spooned some into his mouth. It was just as good as he thought it would be. He enjoyed it thoroughly. But before he could enjoy anymore of it, Thranduil spoke up.
"Elrond, I cannot believe that you are spoiling it, by letting it eat whatever it wants when ever it wants. Have you no sense of discipline in this house? It will end up as big as a horse if you let it keep eating like this. Why not make it eat food that is good for it and its child?" Thranduil could not believe the way they spoiled the Ranger. Letting him have dessert before he even ate more than a bite of his dinner. It was ridiculous.
Elrond grit his teeth so that he didn't yell at the king. He hated the way Thranduil refused to refer to Estel by his name. The woodelf always called Estel "it." But worse than that, was that Estel had put his spoon down and pushed his bowl away from him. Elrond could see tears glistening in the silver eyes.
"I'm sorry."
"Well you should be. You are a spoiled brat. Legolas learned to eat what was put in front of him whether he liked it or not. Obviously Elrond did not teach that lesson to his children." Thranduil snapped at Estel. Estel just hung his head and looked at his hands.
After a while, Estel turned to Elrond. "Ada, may I be excused?" He felt like he was about to start crying and he wanted to leave first.
"Do you not want to finish your ice cream?" Elrond hoped he could coax his child into eating a bit more. But Estel just shook his head "no." "Ok, then you may go."
Estel made to leave the table when Thranduil again spoke up. "NO, my son had the cooks make this for you especially and you skipped your dinner for it, so now you should eat it." Thranduil thrust the bowl of melting ice cream back at the Ranger. "Eat it."
"I'm not really hungry any more." Estel avoided looking at the food. Everyone else at the table recognized the look on Estel's face. They all had learned that meant the Ranger was feeling sick and not to push him to eat.
"I didn't ask if you were hungry, I said to eat it." Thranduil handed the spoon to Estel and glared. Estel wanted to make the king happy, but he knew he couldn't hold it down if he ate it, especially the whole bowl.
"Estel, you don't have to eat any of it if you feel ill." Elrond said. He was at the end of his patience with the king was barely holding on to his politeness. He was just glad Glorfindel had chose to eat dinner with the guard rather than the family.
Estel could see the two powerful elves lock eyes with each other and new that a fight would breakout soon if he didn't do something. So he picked up the bowl and began to spoon the ice cream into his mouth. It now tasted like clay to him. It was hard to force it past the lump in his throat, but he knew he had to or there would be trouble.
He made it half way through the bowl before he could feel it trying to come back up. He managed to swallow it back down and turned to his father again. "Ada, can I be excused?"
"Of course. I will come check on you later." Elrond could not miss the way his child kept licking his lips and swallowing. But at least Thranduil looked somewhat appeased.
Estel barely made it to his washroom before he was violently ill. It was still cold when it came back up. He was so lost in his misery he didn't even look to see who it was that had come in and started rubbing soothing circles on his back. But he could tell that their touch both relaxed and strengthened him.
When he was finally finished the person handed him a glass of mint water to rinse his mouth out, and even helped to steady the glass in Estel's shaking hands. Estel then felt himself enveloped in strong arms and pulled back against a warm chest. They wiped away his tears and hummed softly to him. It was then finally realized it was Legolas that had come to help him. The blond elf stroked Estel's hair back from his face and placed a few gentle kisses on his brow.
"I don't think I like chocolate ice cream anymore." Estel said shakily.
"I don't suppose that you would." Legolas smiled.
"Isn't your father going to be angry with you for leaving the table?" Estel was starting to feel sleepy.
"He doesn't know that I left. Elrond asked to have a word with him and the two left the room. I suspect they didn't want us to see them arguing." Legolas could feel Estel relaxing against him.
"I think I need to go to bed." Estel tried to find the energy to get up, but it just wasn't there. Legolas seemed to sense this and just lifted Estel up and carried him to bed. It worried him greatly how light his friend felt. Estel was nearly asleep by the time Legolas had gotten him changed into his pajamas, so Legolas gave him one final kiss on the forehead and drew the shade before leaving the human to sleep through the night.
Down the hall in Elrond's study things were not so peaceful. Elrond had requested that Thranduil join him here immediately after Estel had left the table. He needed to find a way to make the king understand that he was not going to be allowed to treat Estel that way. In the back of his mind he remembered that he should try and be politic about it, but his paternal protectiveness was getting the best of him.
Once the door was closed Elrond turned to Thranduil. "Don't you ever talk to Estel like that again."
'I am not suppose to tell him my opinion?"
"Not when it involves his eating habits." Elrond took a deep breath hoping to calm himself. "Thranduil, Estel has been hyperemetic since the very beginning of his pregnancy. It is imperative that we let him eat whatever he wants when ever he wants just so that he can have enough energy to survive and keep the pregnancy viable."
"We are not all healers, speak plainly." Thranduil was annoyed that Elrond was using medical terms that he didn't understand. His father had not found it important that he learn the healing arts. Apparently, at least one of the many elves that had acted as Elrond's guardian when he was young, had different ideas.
"It means, that he has been very ill since around the fifth week of his pregnancy. Some days, he vomits so much that he cannot hold down water and is too ill to get out of bed. For months now it has been a struggle to get him to eat at all, much less two meals in one day. It doesn't matter what he eats, just that he eats. I would much prefer that he ate fish and chicken and vegetables every meal that it was served, but he cannot. I will be happy with him eating peanut butter and cookies if that is what he is able to hold down. If he does not eat or is not able to hold down enough food, there is a very real possibility that he could loose the baby, even now."
"Really." Thranduil found this all to be very interesting. Maybe he could take care of this situation after all.
"Please, just promise me that you will leave him alone when it comes to what, when, and how much of something that he chooses to eat."
"Very well, Half elf." Thranduil turned and left in a flurry of robes. He had much work to do.
Three weeks later Estel relaxed in the sun under a large tree. On his lap he held a large tome about the history of Mirkwood. Two weeks ago he had gone the Thranduil and asked to be tutored in the history of the Woodland realm. He knew that the king was very knowledgeable on the subject, so he decided to take a chance. Thranduil had agreed to teach him and so they had lessons in the morning and then Estel read for the next day in the afternoon. He was at least three lessons ahead in reading, but it was of little consequence because he found it interesting.
So engrossed in his reading was Estel, that he did not notice the elf watching him. Legolas stood in he shadows looking at the Ranger. The two had barely spoken at all since Thranduil arrived five weeks ago and he missed his best friend. Thranduil was with Elrond discussing matters that Legolas wanted nothing to do with so now was his chance to snatch some time with Estel.
Decision made, Legolas stalked up soundlessly through the trees until he was a few feet above the human. Then he dropped down beside him. Estel barely seemed startled.
"Hello."
"Hi, what are you reading?" Legolas tried to see over Estel's shoulder from his seat directly beside the human.
"A history of the early days of Mirkwood. Very interesting." Estel tried to hide his smile. He knew Legolas would not be ignored for a "stuffy old book" as he called them.
"Why do you want to read that when the day is so beautiful? You should be out enjoying it."
"I am out enjoying it. Besides, your father told me to read it."
"Sitting under a tree reading a book is not enjoying the day. You should be out on the fields practicing archery or swords." Legolas tried to take the book from Estel. Estel just turned slightly so the book was out of Legolas's reach.
"If you haven't noticed, my friend, I am not in any shape to practice swords." Estel touched his stomach. "Nor do I feel like being laughed at by the Mirkwood guard who have taken up residence on our archery fields." Estel flipped the page even though he hadn't actually read it. 'I think I shall just stay here and read for the afternoon."
Legolas was becoming annoyed with Estel's lack of interest in his presence. He flopped his head in Estel's lap fanning his hair out to cover the pages of the book. Estel looked down at him in question. Legolas smiled at the Ranger and Estel finally smiled back. Legolas had almost forgotten how pretty Estel's smile was. After all, it had been over a month since he had seen the young human smile.
Legolas sat up slightly and kissed Estel on the tip of the nose. Estel smiled even brighter and kissed Legolas on the lips. Legolas returned the peck not expecting it to go any further, but to his surprise and great joy, Estel deepened the kiss. Estel's hair fell forward blocking their kiss from view of prying eyes, but Legolas was developing a rather embarrassing bulge in his leggings.
Finally Legolas broke away, sat up, and looked at the Ranger. Estel blushed. "Did I do something wrong?" Estel asked.
"No." Legolas continued to stare at the Estel, his mind racing to try and figure out where they could go to be alone. Then he remembered the small cave not far from there that the two of them had sat out the spring storm. "Take a walk with me."
Estel stood and followed Legolas, grasping the hand the elf held out for him. He led them to a small cave that Estel remembered well. Legolas settled the two of them on the floor, using Estel's cloak as a bed and his for covers. Now it was Estel's turn to stare at him. Legolas reached for him and he melted into the touch. He had been wanting this for weeks now, to the point where it had almost become a physical pain. It wasn't just the sex, but that was nice too, it was Legolas's touch and presence that he longed for.
Each spot Legolas touched was like being submerged in warm water after a cold day. And when Legolas finally entered him he realized that the elf was his sun. That he would freeze to death without Legolas's touch. The sensation was so intense Estel could almost not bear it. The absolute feeling of completeness of having their entire family together in his body was mind blowing.
When they were finished and collapsed as sweaty heaps under Legolas's cloak, the elf tickled Estel's side and he giggled. Legolas then realized that it had literally been months since he had heard his friend laugh, and he sincerely missed the sound. However, it didn't take long for him to settle into a light doze with Estel cuddled against his chest with one leg still thrown over the elf's hips. Legolas soon began to feel wetness on his chest and noticed that Estel was crying.
"What is wrong Estel?" Legolas tried to look into the human's eyes, but Estel refused to meet them.
"Nothing." Estel sniffled.
"Then why are you crying, sweetheart?" Legolas stroked the Ranger's hair back and kissed his forehead.
"It's just that I am happy to see you. I have missed you." Estel snuggled even closer to the elf as he spoke, still craving the skin on skin contact.
"I missed you to, love. I didn't mean to stay away so long. My father has kept me very busy."
"I know, I guess I was just kind of lonely. I thought maybe I had made you mad or something."
"No, I could never be mad at you. I promise not to stay away so long, if you promise to tell me if you are lonely." Legolas looked down and noticed that Estel was finally looking up at him. The answering smile melted Legolas's heart.
When Legolas got back to the house he made a point of talking to Elrond about Estel's mood. The Half elf had also noticed how down his foster child had been lately. Along with Glorfindel the three devised a picnic by the water falls for the next day to try and cheer up the Ranger.
After the decision was made, Glorfindel left to make arrangements, while Elrond surreptitiously made sure the weather was going to be warm and clear the next day. Legolas was left the job of convincing the Ranger to go. It turned out to be much easier than he had expected. As soon as he had mentioned it to Estel, the human had thrown his arms around Legolas's neck and thanked him for setting up the picnic. He decided not to tell Estel that it was actually Elrond's idea.
So in a good mood and very full of himself, Legolas sought out his father to invite him as well. The outing was supposed to be for family, and Thranduil was family, Legolas's anyway. At first his father seemed reluctant, but he was unable to resist the pleading of his only child for long.
Just after breakfast the next day, Estel, Legolas, Elrond, Glorfindel, the twins, and Thranduil set off towards a steam heated swimming pond near one of the smaller waterfalls. It was little more than an hour's hike, but the weather was beautiful and the forest alive so everyone enjoyed it greatly. Even Thranduil was enjoying himself. He realized that he had been away from his beloved trees for too long and now he reveled in their chatter.
When they finally reached the pool it didn't take long before the twins and Legolas were enjoying a good swim. Even Elrond and Glorfindel stripped down and partook of the warm water. Estel just dangled his feet in saying that because he was as big as a whale he would probably displace too much water. Then he kicked water at Elrohir when he mentioned that even Oliphants liked to bathe in pools. But the younger twin ignored the shower of water because he was just so happy to see Estel's eyes shining again with humour.
Thranduil shunned the pool in favour of perching in a tree above it. Being from a completely landlocked nation, he could never understand the half elf's fascination with water. Thranduil, himself, disliked water greatly and rarely went anywhere near it unless it was in a bath or he had no choice.
While he sat above them all in the tree watching, he turned his attention to Estel. The human did look much happier than Thranduil had seen him since his arrival. His spirit shone through his ridiculously pretty silver eyes and his smile made him look annoyingly radiant, for a human anyway. Thranduil could almost understand what his son saw in the little mortal worm. He also noticed that he could detect a faint glow from his granddaughter as well. Her spirit was now strong enough to be seen if he looked closely, even as she was draining her mother's. He realized if he wanted the human to loose the child he would have to do something soon, before his son became too attached to either. He would hate to see his beloved son, the only reason he still remained in Middle Earth, hurt when his lover died. But that is what would happen if he continued to fall in love with this Ranger.
His plan formed he dropped from the tree just in time to be hit by a shower of water from Glorfindel which had been aimed at Elrond. The dark-haired lord had dropped below the water to avoid it though. The Mirkwood king had to admit he had rarely seen anyone move so well in the water as Elrond. He supposed it had something to do with having grown up always around water but he did not know for sure. Given Elrond's convoluted family tree he was probably related to a mermaid somewhere.
But now was not the time to ponder it, now he had to kill a certain golden- haired elf. "What are you trying to do drown me, you moron?"
Elrond surfaced just in time to hear Thranduil yelling and to see Estel cringe beside him at the sound.
"Nay, you just got in the way. If I wanted to drown you I would take you someplace far more secluded than this, where no one would hear you screaming." Glorfindel smiled back sweetly.
Thranduil wished to say more to the obnoxious Vanyar elf, but took one look at the pleading eyes of his son and again caved in. Instead he turned to Lord Elrond. "Why did you bring your guard dog anyway? I thought this was a family affair."
"Glorfindel is family." Elladan spoke up.
"Yeah, I am their grandmother's cousin."
"You, imp of Morgoth, are about as closely related to them as the Ranger over there. Just because they call you uncle does not make you one." Thranduil enjoyed the hurt expression on Estel's face. It was time for the next insult. "Too bad you are not another adoptive father for Elrond. Then at least Middle Earth would be rid of you, since his fathers never seem to last very long. The kiss of death seems to be being called 'ada' by the half elf." Thranduil mentally considered who would yell at him first. He purposely ignored Legolas. He did not want to see the hurt in his elfling's eyes.
"Ada, can we eat? I am getting hungry." Estel interrupted before anyone could yell at Thranduil. He didn't want this day ruined with fighting. Thranduil enjoyed seeing the spirit seem to bleed out of the young human. He again looked tired and sad. Somewhere, Thranduil could not tell from where, he felt a pang of guilt at making Estel stop smiling. He guessed it was like yelling at a dog. But he did have to admit that Elrond's pet human was frighteningly loyal to the elf lord.
Elrond recognized that Estel was trying to defuse the fight. Part of him wanted to tell the rotten king what he thought of him and then throw him bodily from his valley, but he would not lessen Estel's sacrifice. "Of course, my child. We shall serve lunch right now." In truth it was getting close to lunchtime.
Soon everyone was out of the water and seated on a large blanket to eat. The cooks had sent an enormous amount of food, and even a large hunk of meat still on the bone for Glorfindel's dog. Estel sadly picked at the food on his plate, all appetite gone after the incident with Thranduil earlier. He smiled when someone talked to him or joked with him, but the smile never touched his eyes.
Glorfindel noticed the change in the young human and was determined to do something about it. Picking his target well, he waited until he knew Estel was looking at Elladan and then launched a strawberry straight at the elder twin's face. The fruit exploded on impact, leaving a sticky read trail down Elladan's face. Elladan looked over and Glorfindel innocently pointed at Legolas, who was sitting beside him with a plate full of strawberries. In return Elladan picked up a handful of cooked yams and lobbed them at the prince's face, resulting in a direct hit. It didn't take long before the younger elves and Estel were in a full-fledged food fight. Glorfindel sat back and enjoyed the way Estel cheered up from getting to throw carrots at his brothers.
Finally Elrond was able to end the battle, getting quite messy himself in the process, and everyone settled back down to eat. This time Estel actually ate a bite or two of each type of food on his plate. The elflord guessed it was one of the largest meals the Ranger had eaten in months.
After meals were eaten and food washed out of hair and off faces, Elrond and Glorfindel went exploring to find herbs, while Thranduil again climbed a tree to have a higher vantage point. He watched as Estel leaned back against his son as Legolas lightly massaged the human's back. Elladan and Elrohir seemed to be amusing themselves trying to get rocks to skip across the water.
Estel eventually lied down on the blanket with his head pillowed in Legolas's lap. He gently rubbed his hand up and down on his belly. He started to doze off in the warmth of the day and the warmth of the company when Legolas distracted him.
"Are you feeling unwell?"
"No, why, do I look unwell?" Estel cracked his eyes open to look at the elf.
"No. It is just that you keep rubbing your stomach. I thought perhaps you felt ill."
"Oh, I just do that because it feels good." Estel shrugged. He then felt Legolas's hand begin to rub his belly. The elf used a feather light touch that made Estel giggle. "That just tickles." Thranduil wanted to puke at how cute they were.
The king's ponderings were interrupted by the twins. "Legolas, come with us to the top of the waterfall. The view up there is amazing. There was some quiet discussion between his son and Estel before Legolas dropped a kiss on Estel's forehead and left.
Thranduil watched for a while longer as the human dozed in the sun. But soon the human got up and started to collect the dishes to rinse out. He carried them some ways down stream and Thranduil followed. He found it fitting that the human should be the one cleaning up after the elves. Part of him wished it were Glorfindel doing it just so he could see the mighty Lord of the Golden Flower washing dishes. Thranduil dropped down beside the human startling him badly.
"Did I frighten you, young one?" Thranduil purred as he leaned against a tree trunk.
"Yes. I didn't hear you up there." Estel tried to smile at the elf king. Secretly he had hoped that things had gotten better between them as of late.
"Not surprising." The king mumbled to himself, but out loud he said. "Why are you washing dishes? Surely your brothers would help you when they return."
"Oh, I don't mind. Besides, the smell from the food left on them was starting to make me feel queasy." Estel gave a wan smile to Thranduil.
"Well, we wouldn't want that now would we. You must take better care of your self, dear Estel, you are simply skin and bones. What elf would want to cuddle up to someone as thin as you. It would be like hugging a skeleton, with a big bulbous stomach." Thranduil tilted his head thoughtfully. "I take that back, more like a spider. With a round torso and long thin limbs. I suppose that you remind my son of home." Thranduil was rewarded with the Ranger looking down self-consciously at his belly and blushing.
"Oh, do not act so coy. It is obvious that you and my son have lain together; otherwise you would not be in this state. In fact, I believe most of the Mirkwood guard knows that you two lay together. My son has informed them exactly where you like to be touched and what noised you make. Normally I would not put up with him treating a lady in such a manner, but since you are no lady it is of little consequence. I am more angry with my little Greenleaf for not being more careful when he slept with a whore." Estel looked up at the king with hurt eyes. "Do not look at me like that. What type of person would have sex with a man so quickly? Not a someone of virtue, that is the truth." Estel could feel tears rise in his eyes and again dropped them to the forest floor.
Thranduil saw the tears and reveled in them. "A person like you should not be the type to raise a member of an Elvin Royal family. You will raise the child to have weak morals." Only if Thranduil thought about it, Legolas was far more to blame in this situation than Estel. Estel could not help craving the touch of his child's father, it was only natural, but Estel did not know that. "Yes, I think she will be better off in Mirkwood away from you. We will take her their as soon as she is born. I think it best that you do not see her again after that."
"You can't take her from me." Estel felt fear like he had never felt before at the thought of having his daughter taken from him. But he also felt another type of fear that was so strong and so primal it almost took his breath away. It was the type of fear he felt when he was very young child and went to his mother's room to wake her and she would not answer his call. It surrounded him and made him start to shake.
"Oh yes I can. I am a king, and you are a bastard human that Elrond keeps as a pet. The Elders will never agree to let you keep an Elvin child. The only hope you have would be to tell them who you truly are, and that would mean certain death for her and you." Thranduil smiled evilly at the human and Estel felt another wave of fear nearly drown him. Thranduil of course knew that what he said was mostly untrue. The Elders already knew Estel's identity. Moreover, some of the most powerful among them were either related to Elrond or very close friends of the half elf. They would never side against Elrond, who was the most one of the two most powerful (his mother-in-law Galadriel being the other), but again Estel did not know.
"I know what you are thinking, you will talk to Legolas and he will straighten this whole thing out." Estel had not been thinking that, but it was a good idea. "Well, it won't work. Legolas doesn't care about you. You are nothing more than a broodmare to him. You are a way to spend his time before he marries Elrond's daughter Arwen. Think on it a moment, why would he want you, when he could have the most beautiful elf-maid in centuries? He wouldn't. You are a diversion. He only seeks you out when he wants sex. Or, hadn't you noticed." Thranduil closed in for the kill. "Though I doubt he will want you much longer, the way that you look. My guess is that he will turn again to Elladan's bed or one of his friend's from home and you will be left in the cold. Freezing for his touch. But do not worry, from looking at Glorfindel, Elrond takes good care of his pets." Thranduil began to laugh at Estel's distress as the Ranger ran from the glade he was in. He didn't even pick back up the dishes.
Estel ran back towards the path that would take him home as fast as he could. Tears blurred his vision and he tripped more than once, cutting both his hands and knees. When he made it back to the blankets, Elrond and Glorfindel had returned and were chatting quietly. Thranduil leaned against a tree just off to the side. Estel didn't even wipe the tears from his face before he turned to run home.
Elrond called after his child. "Estel, where are you going in such a hurry?"
"Home." Estel gulped trying to still his tears.
"Why? We were not planning to leave until closer to dark."
"I don't feel well. I want to go lie down." Estel sniffled, but tears still poured down his cheeks.
"Well, wait and we will all go. Or I will return with you if you are feeling ill." Elrond rose to accompany his child.
"No. That is not necessary. I just need to go home. You stay here with the others. I'll go alone." Estel's voice broke on the last word and he turned and ran off again before Elrond could protest. Alone was how he would be for the rest of his life according to Thranduil. Estel had been alone a lot when he was a child. He was the youngest person in Imladris by several hundred years. Consequently he had no one to play with and spent a great deal of time alone. He had hoped as he grew older that he would find someone to spend his time with, be they friend or lover and he had found both in Legolas. Legolas had given him a daughter who would drive away his loneliness. But Legolas didn't love him. Legolas would take his daughter away from him. Estel again felt the irrational fear almost swallow him as he ran back towards the house.
Soon he reached the courtyard winded from running and crying. All the way home he kept thinking on what Thranduil had said. That he would never get to see his daughter. The thought was beyond terrible to him and it literally made him sick as he bent down and vomited in the middle of the courtyard. He felt awful. One reason he tended to eat bland foods, was because they were bland when they came back up. Not so with what he had eaten at lunch.
He felt someone supporting him as he wretched and was glad of it because his knees were beginning to shake. He finally looked up at Erestor's worried face. "Oh Estel, are you going to be alright?"
Estel wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. "Yes, I just am not feeling sick right now."
"Obviously." Erestor smiled at the human. "I shall have someone clean this up and summon your father."
"No, that is alright. I just need to go my room and rest for a while. I am sorry I stopped you." Estel allowed Erestor to lead him into the house and towards the stairs which lead to his rooms. Erestor was someone Estel had known almost his whole life, but was not very close to. He knew that Elrond considered the rather shy elf to be a very good friend, but Estel had just never warmed to him the way he had to Glorfindel. When Estel was young, Erestor had taught him political theory and mathematics. He supposed that he always associated the elf with those boring subjects and long unpleasant afternoons being cooped up in a study for far more hours than a young boy should be forced to sit still. Erestor was the consummate civil servant and Estel did not doubt that Imladris would fall apart without him, but he was not as kind as Elrond or as charismatic as Glorfindel. Erestor enjoyed going over accounts more than archery practice and Estel had always found that just plain weird.
However, right now Estel didn't care about any of that as he leaned slightly on Elrond's advisor. "Do not trouble yourself about that Estel. I was just on my way to the stable to see if the groom had counted the bags of feed we had left to determine how many we would need. I figure that we can see what we don't need and make a tidy profit." Erestor droned on and on about similar veins and Estel remembered why he never sought out this elf's company.
When they finally reached Estel's room, the human rested his head against the door for a moment and Erestor looked on in concern. "Are you sure you will be well?"
"Yes, I will be fine. This happens all the time. I just need to take a nap. Thank you Erestor. And I really am sorry about the courtyard."
"No harm done. You just rest and feel better. I will see you later." Erestor stood outside of the closed door a moment and worried. He had not missed Estel's red rimmed eyes or the way his voice hitched now and then. He did not doubt that the young human felt ill, but there was clearly something else bothering him. He would discuss it with Elrond when he returned.