A/N: Well, here's the new ch., but something seems to be wrong with it, and
I can't put my finger on it. Oh well. Reviews addressed @ end..
Chapter 5
I just made it to Andrews on time. The helo flight was tedious. Sometimes when I was a little girl I wished I could become a bird and fly away from all my problems. Now, I wanted to be a bird, because I felt the one I was in wasn't going fast enough.
I tried mind-contact. I know it sounds nutty, but I was desperate. I had to have some sort of contact with Harm. I didn't dare read his journal where others might see it. It was bad enough I'd invaded his privacy, but to have complete strangers do it.. I don't even want to go there. My hands were twitching, and I couldn't control them. Then I began to shake all over, I had this awful sinking feeling Harm was getting worse if not dying. It was all I could do not to scream at the pilot to go faster, or burst into tears. Me, a Marine, the woman who's been through everything. The woman who had a drunk for a father, a mother who left her at fifteen. Who became an alcoholic, married a con, the woman who picked her life out of the gutter and made something of it. The woman who had been through all this was about to sob over her best friend in front of a Lieutenant J.G. and two zoomies. (Zoomie is a nickname for the Airforce.) The lieutenant turned to me. "Ma'am would you like some water?" she asked holding out a bottle.
"Yes, thank you." I reached for it and took a long drink hoping to steady myself.
"If you don't mind my asking, ma'am, are you alright?"
I shook my head. "It's alright Lieutenant-what did you say your name was?"
"Lieutenant J.G. Jessica Green."
"Glad to meet you. May I call you Jessica?"
"Sure."
"Well, I'm Lieutenant Colonel Sarah Catherine MacKenzie-JAG corps, just call me Mac."
"Okay. Mac, what's wrong?"
"It's a very long story Jessica, that began nearly six years ago, in the White House Rose Garden..."
By the time I'd finished my tale, I practically had Jessica crying with me. "Mac, I sure hope the Commander pulls through this time."
"So do I Jessica. So do I."
"Did you say Commander Rabb?" asked the co-pilot.
"Yes I did. Harm was out here for his quals, he didn't make it back to Andrews because of some blasted storm." I replied.
"I heard something along those lines from people around the base, they said one of the Navy's top pilots had flown into a storm to get back in time for his friend's wedding, and that he had to punch out. Last I heard he was in very serious condition." The pilot said.
"Yeah." I sighed. "I was that friend."
"I'm sorry ma'am. I'm sure he'll make it through, even though he's Navy I hear he's a hell of a pilot. You know he's a legend on the base? Always getting out of tough spots like this one..."
Silence pervaded the rest of the ride. Yet, I kept thinking over and over, Even legends fail eventually. Perhaps this is Harm's last chance. He may not make it..He has to make it!!! Everyone back at JAG needs him! He doesn't even know I love him yet! He can't die!!!!
"We're landing ma'am. Please put on your seat belt." The pilot's voice snapped me back to reality. I was already mapping the quickest route to sickbay from the carrier's deck in my mind.
Only out of habit did I salute the military personnel I passed in my mad dash to sickbay. A petty officer stopped me to inform me where my cabin was. I thanked him, barely stopping there to drop off my things. I flung them absently into the cabin, not caring what broke. I continued quickly to sickbay. A clock formed in my mind with the precious seconds of Harm's life just ticking away...
A/N: As promised, here are the responses:
Sancti: Glad you liked the wall scene. In JAG shows we see Harm talking to his dad, but never Mac talking to him. Considering how close they are this surprises me, so I decided to include a scene like that.
NavyChick: Will do! Thanks for the review!!!
~~: Alright, you have improved in your reviews, they have become more civil I'll admit that. But I don't think you understand where I'm coming from. I don't normally bring this up, because it's considered a family secret, and as far as I'm concerned it's nobody's business because it's history. I'm only bringing this up because it seems to be the only way to stop you from continually ranting at me. My family background is riddled with abuse be it physical or emotional. So quit telling me to go research it. I already have first-hand sources, not to mention I have been on the receiving hand of some really nasty stuff. So, is that enough research for you?
Vickleberry: Thank for reviewing, and understanding where I'm coming from.
Ruli: My prequel to this didn't have a happy ending, and I usually get mad at authors who don't, so, even though I don't normally give spoilers, yes, Harm will survive.
Thank you to all of you who took the time to review!!!! I appreciate it!!!
Author's Note: Again!!! Sorry peoplz!!! You must hate me for all these notes!! But I have to react to some of these reviews!!!
Lt. Col. Eowyn: Your personal opinions aren't always shared amongst Harm/Mac shippers. Or any shipper for that matter. Yes tragedy is a part of life, but one must move on. I normally hate it, as to why I write it, usually because I'm mad at DPB or something..
Lisa: For the life of me I never understood why this story was so popular. I personally think it's one of my worst pieces. Thanks anyway!!!!
Miran Anders: Yep, that's what we seem to do best here, get up front and personal. Oh well, I suppose it's partly my fault. Thanks for reviewing!!!!
Sancti: Yes. Zoomies. Your cuz will probably kill you though. I actually learned it from another author, but now I've forgotten who it was... Thank you..
e-dog: Will try to update-hey, maybe I'll even give you guys a chapter after this, have yet to decide.
~~: Okay, you say I'm ignoring my past. That past always influences the future. What's more you're calling me a hypocrite for saying I love history, but not knowing "it's in the past." I beg to differ. Obviously I still have not made my point. I have learned a great deal though from your last review. You and I come from totally different viewpoints. No, I am not a hypocrite, I have simply learned not to "dwell on the past" or feel sorry for myself. I do not blame say for instance my not being "Miss Popularity" at school on my past problems. I am responsible for my actions, and myself alone. Are you responsible for my actions? Certainly not. Say for instance my friend has a father who abused her. So, when she grows up, she abuses her children so much that one dies. Is her father responsible for what she did? Is he? Should he go to court? Or, is she responsible? I don't normally like to bring religion into affairs such as these, but I have gone to counseling and I have been able to put this behind me. My religion has taught me what I have just re-iterated here. No, you do not have to believe it. I am not asking you to. I am simply explaining why I have the view I do. Again, if I am wrong on your views please correct me. The whole point of FFN is so authors can express their views on what is/has happening/happened in these shows or books, I am doing just that. Yes, I do have problems, and the memories are still there, but I do not blame them on others. You are saying, I believe that Mac is not responsible for her actions because her father abused her. This is why she draws away from Harm when he hurts her. I can understand that. But, you cannot go making Harm or her father or any other figure in her life a scapegoat, because Mac is responsible for her actions. As a lawyer she knows that. What's more I don't want any sarcastic pity from my readers I revealed what I did because I thought it might help, NOT because I wanted pity of any
Chapter 5
I just made it to Andrews on time. The helo flight was tedious. Sometimes when I was a little girl I wished I could become a bird and fly away from all my problems. Now, I wanted to be a bird, because I felt the one I was in wasn't going fast enough.
I tried mind-contact. I know it sounds nutty, but I was desperate. I had to have some sort of contact with Harm. I didn't dare read his journal where others might see it. It was bad enough I'd invaded his privacy, but to have complete strangers do it.. I don't even want to go there. My hands were twitching, and I couldn't control them. Then I began to shake all over, I had this awful sinking feeling Harm was getting worse if not dying. It was all I could do not to scream at the pilot to go faster, or burst into tears. Me, a Marine, the woman who's been through everything. The woman who had a drunk for a father, a mother who left her at fifteen. Who became an alcoholic, married a con, the woman who picked her life out of the gutter and made something of it. The woman who had been through all this was about to sob over her best friend in front of a Lieutenant J.G. and two zoomies. (Zoomie is a nickname for the Airforce.) The lieutenant turned to me. "Ma'am would you like some water?" she asked holding out a bottle.
"Yes, thank you." I reached for it and took a long drink hoping to steady myself.
"If you don't mind my asking, ma'am, are you alright?"
I shook my head. "It's alright Lieutenant-what did you say your name was?"
"Lieutenant J.G. Jessica Green."
"Glad to meet you. May I call you Jessica?"
"Sure."
"Well, I'm Lieutenant Colonel Sarah Catherine MacKenzie-JAG corps, just call me Mac."
"Okay. Mac, what's wrong?"
"It's a very long story Jessica, that began nearly six years ago, in the White House Rose Garden..."
By the time I'd finished my tale, I practically had Jessica crying with me. "Mac, I sure hope the Commander pulls through this time."
"So do I Jessica. So do I."
"Did you say Commander Rabb?" asked the co-pilot.
"Yes I did. Harm was out here for his quals, he didn't make it back to Andrews because of some blasted storm." I replied.
"I heard something along those lines from people around the base, they said one of the Navy's top pilots had flown into a storm to get back in time for his friend's wedding, and that he had to punch out. Last I heard he was in very serious condition." The pilot said.
"Yeah." I sighed. "I was that friend."
"I'm sorry ma'am. I'm sure he'll make it through, even though he's Navy I hear he's a hell of a pilot. You know he's a legend on the base? Always getting out of tough spots like this one..."
Silence pervaded the rest of the ride. Yet, I kept thinking over and over, Even legends fail eventually. Perhaps this is Harm's last chance. He may not make it..He has to make it!!! Everyone back at JAG needs him! He doesn't even know I love him yet! He can't die!!!!
"We're landing ma'am. Please put on your seat belt." The pilot's voice snapped me back to reality. I was already mapping the quickest route to sickbay from the carrier's deck in my mind.
Only out of habit did I salute the military personnel I passed in my mad dash to sickbay. A petty officer stopped me to inform me where my cabin was. I thanked him, barely stopping there to drop off my things. I flung them absently into the cabin, not caring what broke. I continued quickly to sickbay. A clock formed in my mind with the precious seconds of Harm's life just ticking away...
A/N: As promised, here are the responses:
Sancti: Glad you liked the wall scene. In JAG shows we see Harm talking to his dad, but never Mac talking to him. Considering how close they are this surprises me, so I decided to include a scene like that.
NavyChick: Will do! Thanks for the review!!!
~~: Alright, you have improved in your reviews, they have become more civil I'll admit that. But I don't think you understand where I'm coming from. I don't normally bring this up, because it's considered a family secret, and as far as I'm concerned it's nobody's business because it's history. I'm only bringing this up because it seems to be the only way to stop you from continually ranting at me. My family background is riddled with abuse be it physical or emotional. So quit telling me to go research it. I already have first-hand sources, not to mention I have been on the receiving hand of some really nasty stuff. So, is that enough research for you?
Vickleberry: Thank for reviewing, and understanding where I'm coming from.
Ruli: My prequel to this didn't have a happy ending, and I usually get mad at authors who don't, so, even though I don't normally give spoilers, yes, Harm will survive.
Thank you to all of you who took the time to review!!!! I appreciate it!!!
Author's Note: Again!!! Sorry peoplz!!! You must hate me for all these notes!! But I have to react to some of these reviews!!!
Lt. Col. Eowyn: Your personal opinions aren't always shared amongst Harm/Mac shippers. Or any shipper for that matter. Yes tragedy is a part of life, but one must move on. I normally hate it, as to why I write it, usually because I'm mad at DPB or something..
Lisa: For the life of me I never understood why this story was so popular. I personally think it's one of my worst pieces. Thanks anyway!!!!
Miran Anders: Yep, that's what we seem to do best here, get up front and personal. Oh well, I suppose it's partly my fault. Thanks for reviewing!!!!
Sancti: Yes. Zoomies. Your cuz will probably kill you though. I actually learned it from another author, but now I've forgotten who it was... Thank you..
e-dog: Will try to update-hey, maybe I'll even give you guys a chapter after this, have yet to decide.
~~: Okay, you say I'm ignoring my past. That past always influences the future. What's more you're calling me a hypocrite for saying I love history, but not knowing "it's in the past." I beg to differ. Obviously I still have not made my point. I have learned a great deal though from your last review. You and I come from totally different viewpoints. No, I am not a hypocrite, I have simply learned not to "dwell on the past" or feel sorry for myself. I do not blame say for instance my not being "Miss Popularity" at school on my past problems. I am responsible for my actions, and myself alone. Are you responsible for my actions? Certainly not. Say for instance my friend has a father who abused her. So, when she grows up, she abuses her children so much that one dies. Is her father responsible for what she did? Is he? Should he go to court? Or, is she responsible? I don't normally like to bring religion into affairs such as these, but I have gone to counseling and I have been able to put this behind me. My religion has taught me what I have just re-iterated here. No, you do not have to believe it. I am not asking you to. I am simply explaining why I have the view I do. Again, if I am wrong on your views please correct me. The whole point of FFN is so authors can express their views on what is/has happening/happened in these shows or books, I am doing just that. Yes, I do have problems, and the memories are still there, but I do not blame them on others. You are saying, I believe that Mac is not responsible for her actions because her father abused her. This is why she draws away from Harm when he hurts her. I can understand that. But, you cannot go making Harm or her father or any other figure in her life a scapegoat, because Mac is responsible for her actions. As a lawyer she knows that. What's more I don't want any sarcastic pity from my readers I revealed what I did because I thought it might help, NOT because I wanted pity of any