Terry's adventures in Northtown- part 5.
Having seen Mary as the girlfriend of Billy Kane, Terry is still experiencing a mental breakdown. Although he knows it's a bad idea, he can't resist going up to them in the next field. One small blessing is that the Happy Happy Fun Club have buggered off to have fun in the wilderness.
Terry- MARY! Not you as well! What are you doing with this guy?
Billy- Who's he, Mary? How does he know your name, he looks, common.
Mary- Oh him. He tried to mug me once, and I broke both of his legs. You'd think the filthy poor person would learn his lesson by now. (to Terry) Get a job, tramp.
Terry- That's a lie. That's... (remembers Andy telling him Northtown's Terry is a petty crook)
Terry cannot beleive this one. Not only is Mary with Billy in this reality, she is also a snobby rich bitch. He once again falls into the "Elias's death scene from Platoon" pose.
Billy- Geesey, if he's not off my land in a minute, kill him. I'd do it, but I've dinner at Sir Jack Turner's and don't want to ruin the suit.
Geese- Very good m'lord.
Mary- Billy, let's go home now and make love in that new four poster bed you ordered.
Terry- WHAT! I did not need to fucking hear that.
The impossibly rich couple leave. Terry knows he's beaten and leaves before Geese kills him. A while later, he runs into the Happy Happy Fun Club again. They are all sitting around a campfire.
Rock- Hey, stranger guy. You're just in time for a campfire and singalong.
Terry- Uhh...
Yamazaki- It's no trouble at all, friend.
Dong Hwan- Yeah, join us. You haven't seen my brother have you?
Terry- Uh, no. (coming up with a lie to escape the singalong) I'd, you know beeter go find him. You know what the countryside can be like...
Yamazaki- Please. You might scare them.
Using the pretence of finding Jae Hoon, he runs off as they begin singing "Kum Ba Yah". He actually sees Jae sitting alone holding a laptop behind some bushes. He is also puffing on a joint.
Terry- They're looking for you. What you doing with that?
Jae Hoon- Who cares about a singalong when I brought hardcore porn to watch.
Terry- Let's have a look.
At first, it's all good, as he sees a nude Chizuru Kagura and Yuri Sakazaki engaged in things I can't go into depth about here. Later however, the girls on screen are joined by none other than Andy "Lovemuscle" Bogard and the scene really hots up as all three get it on.
Terry- Fuck me! I don't wanna watch my own brother doing it on film. You carry on kid, I'm going.
More aimless wondering, and Terry is having serious doubts about ever getting home to Southtown, and being an all round success again. All of a sudden, he sees a large, bright, flash of light. A few seconds after the light, a small public toilet cubicle materialises out of nowhere, accompanied by old Dr Who sound effects.
Terry- What the @#%$... Does this happen often here? Aw Jesus, it stinks of shit... huh?!
The toilet opens up, and out steps surviving NESTS wannabe leader Krizalid, followed by Angel, NESTS resident bimbo. These are their usual, recognisable Southtown versions.
Angel- You didn't actually have to recreate public bog smells, did you.
Krizalid- Realism is important here.
Terry- OK, do you mind explaining WHAT exactly is going on here? How did you two fuck ups get here to this reality? I want answers, and I want you to take me home.
Angel- Tell him about our evil plan, boss.
Terry- What evil plan?
Krizalid- Yes, our evil plan. You see, this is NESTS, well, what's left of us's newest invention. A reality crossing, time travel toilet.
Terry is confused. So is Angel, but that's normal for her.
Krizalid- With it, we can travel to any alternative universe, or send anyone away to one. It was us who sent you here, and our ultimate goal is to send all the KOF good guys, and anyone else we hate here, and RULE THE WORLD! The world being our own one, just to explain.
Terry- But how did you get me in there?
Krizalid- Remeber going out drinking with everyone. You left them for a few minutes to go for a piss. We conveniently left this waiting for you, warped you here, and warped ourselves back. You were too drunk to notice anything wrong.
Terry- He goes on a bit doesn't he?
Angel- Tell me about it. He say's long winded speeches are a big part of being a villain. So's gloating at our enemies while telling them our plans, which is the only reason we came back here.
Krizalid- That's right. Ready, evil laughter time.
Both baddies begin to laugh, loudly in the style of Dr Evil from Austin Powers.
Krizalid- This is only my first step to world domination.
Angel- Good idea to test it on K9999 first, and leave him in some godforsaken reality forever. He was soo annoying.
Krizalid- Imagine, me, king of the world, you, my ever willing sex object...
Angel- HEY! You said I could be a queen! (cries)
Krizalid- That was pillow talk. I didn't mean that.
Terry- But aren't you, you know, gay Krizalid?
Krizalid- I'm not gay! What happened between me and Zero was purely innocent, friends, nothing more.
Terry- I heard you did a striptease for him on his birthday. And that you were both into Elton John, and...
Krizalid is angry now. Angel is laughing her perfectly shaped arse off.
Krizalid- Shut up. It's not important. What is is that we'll ship everyone here, and conquer the real world without any hassle. And get my vengance for the death of dear, sweet Zero.
Terry- Yeah right. You'll be beaten again, like you always are. Gotta say though, this plan's better than your last one.
Krizalid- Don't remind me. Trying to annoy fighters into submission with the cheesiest Bee Gees music. What was I thinking?
Angel- I like the Bee Gees?
Krizalid- Shut up. You're NESTS sex appeal, you're not allowed opinions. Go stand around in provocative poses again.
Angel does as she's told and stands there looking sexy in a variety of poses.
Terry- A toilet? Who uses a public toilet?
Angel- Bill+Ted and Dr Who had phone boxes. We needed to be original, that's what the boss says anyway.
Krizalid- I'm warning you...
Terry- Enough of this shit. You don't take me back, I'm hijacking that toilet by force! Well!
Krizalid- Just you try it.
Will Terry get back to Southtown, and does he realise how stupid hijacking a toilet seems? Will Angel keep taking her boss's crap? And who DOES use a bloody toilet anyway? Stay tuned for the final chapter, soon.
Having seen Mary as the girlfriend of Billy Kane, Terry is still experiencing a mental breakdown. Although he knows it's a bad idea, he can't resist going up to them in the next field. One small blessing is that the Happy Happy Fun Club have buggered off to have fun in the wilderness.
Terry- MARY! Not you as well! What are you doing with this guy?
Billy- Who's he, Mary? How does he know your name, he looks, common.
Mary- Oh him. He tried to mug me once, and I broke both of his legs. You'd think the filthy poor person would learn his lesson by now. (to Terry) Get a job, tramp.
Terry- That's a lie. That's... (remembers Andy telling him Northtown's Terry is a petty crook)
Terry cannot beleive this one. Not only is Mary with Billy in this reality, she is also a snobby rich bitch. He once again falls into the "Elias's death scene from Platoon" pose.
Billy- Geesey, if he's not off my land in a minute, kill him. I'd do it, but I've dinner at Sir Jack Turner's and don't want to ruin the suit.
Geese- Very good m'lord.
Mary- Billy, let's go home now and make love in that new four poster bed you ordered.
Terry- WHAT! I did not need to fucking hear that.
The impossibly rich couple leave. Terry knows he's beaten and leaves before Geese kills him. A while later, he runs into the Happy Happy Fun Club again. They are all sitting around a campfire.
Rock- Hey, stranger guy. You're just in time for a campfire and singalong.
Terry- Uhh...
Yamazaki- It's no trouble at all, friend.
Dong Hwan- Yeah, join us. You haven't seen my brother have you?
Terry- Uh, no. (coming up with a lie to escape the singalong) I'd, you know beeter go find him. You know what the countryside can be like...
Yamazaki- Please. You might scare them.
Using the pretence of finding Jae Hoon, he runs off as they begin singing "Kum Ba Yah". He actually sees Jae sitting alone holding a laptop behind some bushes. He is also puffing on a joint.
Terry- They're looking for you. What you doing with that?
Jae Hoon- Who cares about a singalong when I brought hardcore porn to watch.
Terry- Let's have a look.
At first, it's all good, as he sees a nude Chizuru Kagura and Yuri Sakazaki engaged in things I can't go into depth about here. Later however, the girls on screen are joined by none other than Andy "Lovemuscle" Bogard and the scene really hots up as all three get it on.
Terry- Fuck me! I don't wanna watch my own brother doing it on film. You carry on kid, I'm going.
More aimless wondering, and Terry is having serious doubts about ever getting home to Southtown, and being an all round success again. All of a sudden, he sees a large, bright, flash of light. A few seconds after the light, a small public toilet cubicle materialises out of nowhere, accompanied by old Dr Who sound effects.
Terry- What the @#%$... Does this happen often here? Aw Jesus, it stinks of shit... huh?!
The toilet opens up, and out steps surviving NESTS wannabe leader Krizalid, followed by Angel, NESTS resident bimbo. These are their usual, recognisable Southtown versions.
Angel- You didn't actually have to recreate public bog smells, did you.
Krizalid- Realism is important here.
Terry- OK, do you mind explaining WHAT exactly is going on here? How did you two fuck ups get here to this reality? I want answers, and I want you to take me home.
Angel- Tell him about our evil plan, boss.
Terry- What evil plan?
Krizalid- Yes, our evil plan. You see, this is NESTS, well, what's left of us's newest invention. A reality crossing, time travel toilet.
Terry is confused. So is Angel, but that's normal for her.
Krizalid- With it, we can travel to any alternative universe, or send anyone away to one. It was us who sent you here, and our ultimate goal is to send all the KOF good guys, and anyone else we hate here, and RULE THE WORLD! The world being our own one, just to explain.
Terry- But how did you get me in there?
Krizalid- Remeber going out drinking with everyone. You left them for a few minutes to go for a piss. We conveniently left this waiting for you, warped you here, and warped ourselves back. You were too drunk to notice anything wrong.
Terry- He goes on a bit doesn't he?
Angel- Tell me about it. He say's long winded speeches are a big part of being a villain. So's gloating at our enemies while telling them our plans, which is the only reason we came back here.
Krizalid- That's right. Ready, evil laughter time.
Both baddies begin to laugh, loudly in the style of Dr Evil from Austin Powers.
Krizalid- This is only my first step to world domination.
Angel- Good idea to test it on K9999 first, and leave him in some godforsaken reality forever. He was soo annoying.
Krizalid- Imagine, me, king of the world, you, my ever willing sex object...
Angel- HEY! You said I could be a queen! (cries)
Krizalid- That was pillow talk. I didn't mean that.
Terry- But aren't you, you know, gay Krizalid?
Krizalid- I'm not gay! What happened between me and Zero was purely innocent, friends, nothing more.
Terry- I heard you did a striptease for him on his birthday. And that you were both into Elton John, and...
Krizalid is angry now. Angel is laughing her perfectly shaped arse off.
Krizalid- Shut up. It's not important. What is is that we'll ship everyone here, and conquer the real world without any hassle. And get my vengance for the death of dear, sweet Zero.
Terry- Yeah right. You'll be beaten again, like you always are. Gotta say though, this plan's better than your last one.
Krizalid- Don't remind me. Trying to annoy fighters into submission with the cheesiest Bee Gees music. What was I thinking?
Angel- I like the Bee Gees?
Krizalid- Shut up. You're NESTS sex appeal, you're not allowed opinions. Go stand around in provocative poses again.
Angel does as she's told and stands there looking sexy in a variety of poses.
Terry- A toilet? Who uses a public toilet?
Angel- Bill+Ted and Dr Who had phone boxes. We needed to be original, that's what the boss says anyway.
Krizalid- I'm warning you...
Terry- Enough of this shit. You don't take me back, I'm hijacking that toilet by force! Well!
Krizalid- Just you try it.
Will Terry get back to Southtown, and does he realise how stupid hijacking a toilet seems? Will Angel keep taking her boss's crap? And who DOES use a bloody toilet anyway? Stay tuned for the final chapter, soon.