Disclaimer: We don't own HP. Please don't sue us! JKR is the copyright holder.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

This story is based on a "Dear Abby"- type column, written by Ron Weasley for the Hogsmeade Herald, a newspaper that is also available at Hogwarts. Yes, this is a Ron/Hermione fic. For any readers familiar with the Speaker's Corner on CITY-TV, Ron's responses take the form of those common to the Devil's Advocates.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

WWW.WOW

Wacky Wise Wizard's: Words on Women: Issue #4

Welcome back, readers, here is my fourth installment of Words on Women. On to our first letter:

"Dear WWW: Why does the boy I like seem SO PIG HEADED, he can't even agree with me on anything for fear it will actually make him look like he was thinking? Signed, Brown Bookworm."

Dear Insufferable Know-It-All: This boy probably has no idea you like him because you are too busy telling him off for even the slightest of transgressions. I bet you bug him about doing his homework, revising more, the way he plays games instead of reading and the like. Try to learn from his example. I imagine he is quite full of a love of life and is more than willing to share it with you. Just loosen up and go with the flow. Telling him how you feel might actually make him see that you like him.

"Dear WWW: My best friend likes a girl, the same girl likes him, EVERYONE KNOWS IT except the two of them. They fight constantly and I am at my wits end. Signed, Green Lantern."

Dear Green Goblin: I answered a letter in last issue very much like yours, could you be this mysterious best friend? In case you missed it, here is what I said to her: {Dear Fairly Frustrated Friend: Just get together with his friend and arrange a stunt that will get them alone together without realizing it. Maybe talk to her where she doesn't know he is listening and get her to tell you how she feels. The other thing is to get her to appear to be seeing some else. Maybe his best friend (make sure the best friend isn't interested in her first), then see if he is jealous. Always a surefire way to tell. As long as the guy isn't a red head. They don't fall for stuff that easily and are very insightful. He would not have any difficulties spotting the signs of love.} If you are the mysterious best friend, just tell him where you stand and that he has to tell the girl or he'll lose her forever and she'll go off and date some famous international Quidditch star. Maybe suggest he write her secret admirer notes to gauge her response.

Dear WWW: I really like this girl, and I think she likes me, but we have a problem. I cannot say anything for fear her overprotective brother will try to end my life. What am I to do? Signed, Seeking Solitude."

Dear Rude Tude Dude: BAD IDEA, never mess with a girl who has an overprotective brother. You have every right to be afraid, in particular if she is a redhead. They are pretty and have lots of spunk, but the big brothers are generally big on saving their little sister. I suggest looking at a nice brunette, preferably one who is smart.

Well that's it. Another week gone by. Keep sending your questions of woe and I'll keep giving my golden advice.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Please review. If you like, send your own question to "WWW" in your review. We will do our best to answer them. Your penname will be posted next to your question. Please don't be insulted by any of Ron's answers, this is all in good fun. Note: Questions sent to "WWW" should preferably not come from any of the main characters in the books, especially from Ron. Pretend you are the student writing the letter (your penname will be your alias).