Title: Healing
Feedback: Of course I want to know what you think otherwise I'd hide it in a folder on my computer! Kristi@allengames.com
Disclaimer: They belong to Joss. If they were mine I'd be nicer to them! At least most of the time.
Spoilers: Only if you have lived in a cave and not seen any of Angel or Buffy.
Distribution: If you want it just ask!
Author's notes: The centered offset quotes are quotes pulled from the shows. I didn't write them, I didn't think of them. Also I wanted to thank everyone who sent me feedback! This is my first fanfic and it's very inspiring! If you'd like to see more of this story let me know!
You didn't really think I'd end it there did you?
Chapter Nine
Willow sat in the library, inconsolable. She checked book after book. It had to be wrong. There was never any indication that the spell would kill Angel. She knew she risked releasing Angelus but she hadn't realized she had risked his life completely. Tears fell on the yellowed pages of the books. She wiped at them. There was a quiet knock on the library door. Willow looked up as Giles stepped in. She stood up and tackled Giles in a hug. The very British man was taken aback a moment before he put his arms around the redhead and let her cry.
* * *
Time has ceased to exist for Buffy. She didn't know how long she lay bent over her lover's body. The candles had burned low. They were the only light in the room. Buffy's tears had ceased to fall. She had cried all the life out of herself. There was only numbness and death. She silently unlocked the manacles from Angel's wrists and ankles.
Buffy lay down next to Angel's cold body, somehow he seemed colder to the touch then he had before. She pillowed her cheek on his chest and pulled his arm around her. She remembered a crypt she'd seen once. The top was carved to resemble two lovers, lying like this. The inscription had been in Latin. She wished now that she had been able to read it, maybe they had been found like that and buried together.
"Buffy," It was so faint she was sure she had imagined it but she sat up franticly anyway.
"Angel?" It was a question, the most important question.
His eyelids fluttered almost imperceptibly. Buffy knelt beside him. Her hands stroked the face that had reverted to human sometime earlier, his strong brow, those beautiful cheekbones, the lips that never did smile enough. "Angel, Angel, come back to me. Don't leave me now." Buffy pleaded, tears she thought were long gone gathering in her voice.
He coughed weakly, blood splattered his lips "Never," he whispered so faintly she had to lean closer to hear him.
She covered his face in kisses and tears. "We need to get you somewhere you can rest comfortably."
"In a minute," he reached a hand out to her; Buffy took it and drew herself back down, into his arms. He still seemed colder to her then usual, even colder then the room itself. It worried her; Angel was always room temperature, unless he'd just finished drinking warm blood.
"Angel, honey, we've got to get you some place warmer. You're too cold. You need to eat and you need to be warm." Buffy stood up and awkwardly got his big body up off the floor. He stumbled a bit and fell against her; nearly knocking them both back down. Buffy struggled to get him out of the room, down the hall and into an elevator. Her slayer strength made her stronger then him, but it was still awkward and clumsy when trying to carry someone a foot taller then she was.
Once in the elevator she let him rest in a corner. Buffy punched in the code for the penthouse. Buffy bounced on the balls of her feet, urging the elevator to go faster. When it finally reached the penthouse floor it took everything she had to get Angel back up and moving toward the bedroom. Once she got him in the bed she took his boots off and piled every blanket she could find on top of him. She got the blankets from the spare room and piled them on top of him.
"You're gonna be okay, Angel. I don't know what's wrong, but we're gonna fix it." Buffy retrieved the cordless phone from the bedside and called the front desk.
"I need Willow." Buffy said as she crawled under the blankets and covered as much of Angel's body as she could, trying to warm him with her own body.
"I'm sorry. We don't have a Willow working here."
"Harmony, you ditz, this is Buffy, remember Willow, the red head witch you were mercilessly mean to in High School. I need her. I need you to find her. She's in the building, probably either the library or the magical studies lab. Send her to Angel's apartment immediately. I also need you to find Giles and Wesley and tell them the same thing. Now, not later, not when you finish painting your nails, now."
"Well okay, but geez, you know, I could eat you, you should be nicer to me."
"And I could stake you and then let the janitor clean up the dust. Now." Buffy hung up.
Willow was there inside of 10 minutes. "Angel's not dead! Buffy, that's great."
"Something is wrong with him, Will. He's really cold and he's hurting and weak. Get some blood out of the fridge, heat it up for a couple of minutes and bring it in here please. If there's a bag of anything human in there bring it."
Willow nodded and disappeared into the kitchen.
Angel shivered under all the blankets. "Buffy, so cold."
"I know. Willow is bringing you some warm blood. I'm doing everything I can."
Buffy helped him sit up, supporting him with her body. Willow handed her the mug. Buffy held it for him. "Wrap your hands around this, Angel. I'll hold it, but it'll warm up your hands."
Angel drank the blood slowly. He seemed to have stopped shivering quite as much. Giles and Wesley had shown up by then and were conferring with Willow in the living room. Buffy tucked blankets around him and promised to come check on him in a moment.
"I just want to see what Giles, Wes and Willow have come up with. I'm right in the next room if you need me."
Angel nodded and closed his eyes. Buffy looked at him anxiously and then walked into the living room.
"What have we found out?" Buffy asked. She stood with her arms crossed over her chest, watching Wes and Giles pour over the books.
Giles removed his glasses and rubbed his forehead. "I think maybe this is just a reaction to Willow's spell, perhaps even an indication that the spell worked properly. Once he gets some rest, and eats, he should be alright, I believe."
"I concur." Wes added. "I believe we can take this as a sign Willow's spell worked. And it would make sense. Angel is recovering from battle wounds. He had quite an internal battle, from the external signs we saw. He needs to recover from it just as he would a physical battle. Give him a little bit of time and I believe he'll be as good as new."
Buffy nodded. "Thank you all for coming up here so quickly. Willow, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell at you."
The sweet redhead smiled and shook her head. "No, it's okay. You were upset and I understand. I wish I'd know to expect this, at least I could have warned you."
Buffy gave her a brief hug. "If you guys want to show yourself out, I'm going to check on Angel. I'll let you know how he is. And Wes, if you could let everyone else know we think he's going to be okay."
"Of course, Buffy. Take care of Angel; I'll handle the rest for the moment."
Buffy crawled back into the bed with Angel. He had stopped shivering and he felt a bit warmer to the touch. She snuggled up into his chest. "How are you feeling?" she asked.
Angel smiled at her weakly. "Better now." He dipped his head and kissed her very gently. Buffy returned the kiss with trembling lips. Fire spread through her, from her lips, down her spine, all the way to her toes. The kiss deepened and grew from innocence into full blown passion. Buffy pulled back, barely able to breathe, she looked up into Angel's face. His eyes were burning with intensity. He gave her only a moment before capturing her mouth with his own again. His mouth moved from hers, across her jaw and down her neck. He stopped where he'd left his mark on her and kissed it gently. "Mine," Angel whispered before running his tongue over the scar. Buffy arched her body into his.
"From the moment I was born, I was yours, Angel. I was made to love you. Sometimes I think my soul in heaven was yours from the beginning of time."
He shifted his body and looked into her eyes. "There are no words to tell you, how beautiful you are to me."
Buffy touched traced his eyebrow and kissed his cheekbone. She cradled his face in her hands. "I know we've got this brand new anchored soul to test out, but maybe you should rest. We've got the rest of our lives."
Angel shook his head. "It doesn't matter if we've got the rest of eternity, it's not enough time."
They undressed each other slowly, taking time to savor each inch of skin uncovered. Buffy kissed the base of his throat, noticing for the first time a very faint cross shaped scar. "What happened?" she asked.
He smiled. "Do you remember the night in the Bronze, the first time you kissed me after you found out I was a vampire."
-"It's just-"-
-".painful, I know. See you around?"-
Buffy nodded. She had already fallen so deep in love with him by then, she hadn't even realized it, or maybe she had and she just wasn't ready to accept it yet.
"The cross you were wearing, when we kissed, it burned me." Angel said.
"Why didn't you say something? Pull away?" She asked.
"Kissing you was worth the pain." He answered simply.
Buffy looked at him with tears in her eyes and gently kissed the scar. "And this is worth all the pain we've gone through to get to this point, Angel."
"Buffy, this is worth over a century of pain, and many centuries more, even if all we ever have is this one-"
Buffy silenced him with a kiss. "Don't. I will not wake up with you gone, ever again. Promise me?"
"I promise." He kissed her, "One last thing, Buffy and then that's enough talking."
"Hmmm?" She sighed with pleasure.
"Just in case, there's a stake under the bed."
Buffy opened her eyes and looked straight into his. They were determined, the same sort of look she had before she went into battle. "No, that's not going to happen this time. You promised remember?"
In answer, Angel kissed her again. He ran his hands down her back and rested them on her hips. Her body was a marvel, so tiny, so perfect, with so much strength in every muscle, every movement. He started to tell her how beautiful, how perfect she was, but he had no words, not in his eyes.
Buffy kissed the corded muscles of Angel's neck. He wasn't cold anymore. When they were this close it seemed her warmth became his, her heartbeat, his heartbeat and even her breath, his breath. She ran her hot little hands over his body. There was so much pain, so much heartache to make up for. They had so much healing to do, healing that could only be done together.
Buffy kept her eyes open while Angel ran his hands over her body. This was to close to her dreams, she wanted to make sure that she hadn't fallen asleep and into a dream. Angel's hands were cool, but everywhere they touched her started a fire that burned down to her very bones. Everything inside of her wanted him, wanted to touch the marble coolness of his skin.
"Buffy," Angel's voice was velvety smooth and husky with desire. "I love you. I want my life to be with you."
In answer, Buffy wrapped herself around him. Angel already had her mind, her heart and her soul. He had since the day she knocked him on his back in that alley behind the Bronze. She gave him the only she had left to give, the one thing she'd never been able to give, her body.
Feedback: Of course I want to know what you think otherwise I'd hide it in a folder on my computer! Kristi@allengames.com
Disclaimer: They belong to Joss. If they were mine I'd be nicer to them! At least most of the time.
Spoilers: Only if you have lived in a cave and not seen any of Angel or Buffy.
Distribution: If you want it just ask!
Author's notes: The centered offset quotes are quotes pulled from the shows. I didn't write them, I didn't think of them. Also I wanted to thank everyone who sent me feedback! This is my first fanfic and it's very inspiring! If you'd like to see more of this story let me know!
You didn't really think I'd end it there did you?
Chapter Nine
Willow sat in the library, inconsolable. She checked book after book. It had to be wrong. There was never any indication that the spell would kill Angel. She knew she risked releasing Angelus but she hadn't realized she had risked his life completely. Tears fell on the yellowed pages of the books. She wiped at them. There was a quiet knock on the library door. Willow looked up as Giles stepped in. She stood up and tackled Giles in a hug. The very British man was taken aback a moment before he put his arms around the redhead and let her cry.
* * *
Time has ceased to exist for Buffy. She didn't know how long she lay bent over her lover's body. The candles had burned low. They were the only light in the room. Buffy's tears had ceased to fall. She had cried all the life out of herself. There was only numbness and death. She silently unlocked the manacles from Angel's wrists and ankles.
Buffy lay down next to Angel's cold body, somehow he seemed colder to the touch then he had before. She pillowed her cheek on his chest and pulled his arm around her. She remembered a crypt she'd seen once. The top was carved to resemble two lovers, lying like this. The inscription had been in Latin. She wished now that she had been able to read it, maybe they had been found like that and buried together.
"Buffy," It was so faint she was sure she had imagined it but she sat up franticly anyway.
"Angel?" It was a question, the most important question.
His eyelids fluttered almost imperceptibly. Buffy knelt beside him. Her hands stroked the face that had reverted to human sometime earlier, his strong brow, those beautiful cheekbones, the lips that never did smile enough. "Angel, Angel, come back to me. Don't leave me now." Buffy pleaded, tears she thought were long gone gathering in her voice.
He coughed weakly, blood splattered his lips "Never," he whispered so faintly she had to lean closer to hear him.
She covered his face in kisses and tears. "We need to get you somewhere you can rest comfortably."
"In a minute," he reached a hand out to her; Buffy took it and drew herself back down, into his arms. He still seemed colder to her then usual, even colder then the room itself. It worried her; Angel was always room temperature, unless he'd just finished drinking warm blood.
"Angel, honey, we've got to get you some place warmer. You're too cold. You need to eat and you need to be warm." Buffy stood up and awkwardly got his big body up off the floor. He stumbled a bit and fell against her; nearly knocking them both back down. Buffy struggled to get him out of the room, down the hall and into an elevator. Her slayer strength made her stronger then him, but it was still awkward and clumsy when trying to carry someone a foot taller then she was.
Once in the elevator she let him rest in a corner. Buffy punched in the code for the penthouse. Buffy bounced on the balls of her feet, urging the elevator to go faster. When it finally reached the penthouse floor it took everything she had to get Angel back up and moving toward the bedroom. Once she got him in the bed she took his boots off and piled every blanket she could find on top of him. She got the blankets from the spare room and piled them on top of him.
"You're gonna be okay, Angel. I don't know what's wrong, but we're gonna fix it." Buffy retrieved the cordless phone from the bedside and called the front desk.
"I need Willow." Buffy said as she crawled under the blankets and covered as much of Angel's body as she could, trying to warm him with her own body.
"I'm sorry. We don't have a Willow working here."
"Harmony, you ditz, this is Buffy, remember Willow, the red head witch you were mercilessly mean to in High School. I need her. I need you to find her. She's in the building, probably either the library or the magical studies lab. Send her to Angel's apartment immediately. I also need you to find Giles and Wesley and tell them the same thing. Now, not later, not when you finish painting your nails, now."
"Well okay, but geez, you know, I could eat you, you should be nicer to me."
"And I could stake you and then let the janitor clean up the dust. Now." Buffy hung up.
Willow was there inside of 10 minutes. "Angel's not dead! Buffy, that's great."
"Something is wrong with him, Will. He's really cold and he's hurting and weak. Get some blood out of the fridge, heat it up for a couple of minutes and bring it in here please. If there's a bag of anything human in there bring it."
Willow nodded and disappeared into the kitchen.
Angel shivered under all the blankets. "Buffy, so cold."
"I know. Willow is bringing you some warm blood. I'm doing everything I can."
Buffy helped him sit up, supporting him with her body. Willow handed her the mug. Buffy held it for him. "Wrap your hands around this, Angel. I'll hold it, but it'll warm up your hands."
Angel drank the blood slowly. He seemed to have stopped shivering quite as much. Giles and Wesley had shown up by then and were conferring with Willow in the living room. Buffy tucked blankets around him and promised to come check on him in a moment.
"I just want to see what Giles, Wes and Willow have come up with. I'm right in the next room if you need me."
Angel nodded and closed his eyes. Buffy looked at him anxiously and then walked into the living room.
"What have we found out?" Buffy asked. She stood with her arms crossed over her chest, watching Wes and Giles pour over the books.
Giles removed his glasses and rubbed his forehead. "I think maybe this is just a reaction to Willow's spell, perhaps even an indication that the spell worked properly. Once he gets some rest, and eats, he should be alright, I believe."
"I concur." Wes added. "I believe we can take this as a sign Willow's spell worked. And it would make sense. Angel is recovering from battle wounds. He had quite an internal battle, from the external signs we saw. He needs to recover from it just as he would a physical battle. Give him a little bit of time and I believe he'll be as good as new."
Buffy nodded. "Thank you all for coming up here so quickly. Willow, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell at you."
The sweet redhead smiled and shook her head. "No, it's okay. You were upset and I understand. I wish I'd know to expect this, at least I could have warned you."
Buffy gave her a brief hug. "If you guys want to show yourself out, I'm going to check on Angel. I'll let you know how he is. And Wes, if you could let everyone else know we think he's going to be okay."
"Of course, Buffy. Take care of Angel; I'll handle the rest for the moment."
Buffy crawled back into the bed with Angel. He had stopped shivering and he felt a bit warmer to the touch. She snuggled up into his chest. "How are you feeling?" she asked.
Angel smiled at her weakly. "Better now." He dipped his head and kissed her very gently. Buffy returned the kiss with trembling lips. Fire spread through her, from her lips, down her spine, all the way to her toes. The kiss deepened and grew from innocence into full blown passion. Buffy pulled back, barely able to breathe, she looked up into Angel's face. His eyes were burning with intensity. He gave her only a moment before capturing her mouth with his own again. His mouth moved from hers, across her jaw and down her neck. He stopped where he'd left his mark on her and kissed it gently. "Mine," Angel whispered before running his tongue over the scar. Buffy arched her body into his.
"From the moment I was born, I was yours, Angel. I was made to love you. Sometimes I think my soul in heaven was yours from the beginning of time."
He shifted his body and looked into her eyes. "There are no words to tell you, how beautiful you are to me."
Buffy touched traced his eyebrow and kissed his cheekbone. She cradled his face in her hands. "I know we've got this brand new anchored soul to test out, but maybe you should rest. We've got the rest of our lives."
Angel shook his head. "It doesn't matter if we've got the rest of eternity, it's not enough time."
They undressed each other slowly, taking time to savor each inch of skin uncovered. Buffy kissed the base of his throat, noticing for the first time a very faint cross shaped scar. "What happened?" she asked.
He smiled. "Do you remember the night in the Bronze, the first time you kissed me after you found out I was a vampire."
-"It's just-"-
-".painful, I know. See you around?"-
Buffy nodded. She had already fallen so deep in love with him by then, she hadn't even realized it, or maybe she had and she just wasn't ready to accept it yet.
"The cross you were wearing, when we kissed, it burned me." Angel said.
"Why didn't you say something? Pull away?" She asked.
"Kissing you was worth the pain." He answered simply.
Buffy looked at him with tears in her eyes and gently kissed the scar. "And this is worth all the pain we've gone through to get to this point, Angel."
"Buffy, this is worth over a century of pain, and many centuries more, even if all we ever have is this one-"
Buffy silenced him with a kiss. "Don't. I will not wake up with you gone, ever again. Promise me?"
"I promise." He kissed her, "One last thing, Buffy and then that's enough talking."
"Hmmm?" She sighed with pleasure.
"Just in case, there's a stake under the bed."
Buffy opened her eyes and looked straight into his. They were determined, the same sort of look she had before she went into battle. "No, that's not going to happen this time. You promised remember?"
In answer, Angel kissed her again. He ran his hands down her back and rested them on her hips. Her body was a marvel, so tiny, so perfect, with so much strength in every muscle, every movement. He started to tell her how beautiful, how perfect she was, but he had no words, not in his eyes.
Buffy kissed the corded muscles of Angel's neck. He wasn't cold anymore. When they were this close it seemed her warmth became his, her heartbeat, his heartbeat and even her breath, his breath. She ran her hot little hands over his body. There was so much pain, so much heartache to make up for. They had so much healing to do, healing that could only be done together.
Buffy kept her eyes open while Angel ran his hands over her body. This was to close to her dreams, she wanted to make sure that she hadn't fallen asleep and into a dream. Angel's hands were cool, but everywhere they touched her started a fire that burned down to her very bones. Everything inside of her wanted him, wanted to touch the marble coolness of his skin.
"Buffy," Angel's voice was velvety smooth and husky with desire. "I love you. I want my life to be with you."
In answer, Buffy wrapped herself around him. Angel already had her mind, her heart and her soul. He had since the day she knocked him on his back in that alley behind the Bronze. She gave him the only she had left to give, the one thing she'd never been able to give, her body.